I slid the Jack and Coke across the bar. “Here you go, Ethan.”
“Thanks, Bell. Things look busier in here. Even after the dinner rush.”
I scanned the crowd. There were a heck of a lot more people than usual, and I think that was in large part because a band was about to take the stage. Ford hadn’t wasted any time getting a few different acts lined up, and it looked like his play was going to work. I glanced down the aisle to see none other than Lacey Hotchkiss with her boobs resting on top of the bar as if they were a platter for Ford to feast from.
Lacey and I had never become friends, much to my parents’ chagrin. But we’d mostly stayed on opposite corners of life on the island. She hadn’t once been into The Catch since I’d worked here. Of course, now that Ford was back, here she was. I was honestly surprised it had taken her this long. My stomach roiled as the two of them laughed, Lacey flicking her long, blond hair over her shoulder. I gripped the edge of the bar and forced my gaze back to the man in front of me. “Uh, yeah. I think people are excited about the band.”
Ethan nodded. “That was a really smart idea.”
I busied myself wiping down the bar. “It wasn’t mine.”
“Whose was it?”
Ethan blanched, coming to the realization that Ford was behind the live music. “Don’t worry. Ford and I have gotten over our bad blood.”
Ethan studied me carefully. “You sure? It takes a lot to get you riled up enough to pour a beer over a man’s head.”
I grinned. “And let that be a warning to you to never piss me off.” He held up his hands in surrender. “So, where’s your boss?” I hadn’t seen much of Hunter since we’d buried the hatchet at the bonfire.
Ethan took a sip of his drink, then set it on the bar. “He’ll be here in a bit. Just wanted to stop by his parents’ and see if they needed anything.”
“Good. I miss seeing his ugly mug around here.”
Ethan grinned. “Make sure you tell him just how ugly it is.”
“Always do. Can’t have all the attention the ladies lavish on him going to his head.”
Ethan lifted his drink in a toast. “Amen to that.”
“Speak of the Devil.”
Hunter slid onto the empty stool, and Ethan gave him a friendly slap on the back. “What? You guys talking about how amazing I am?”
I stepped up onto the shelf under the bar so I could lean over the counter. I grabbed Hunt’s face in my hands and laid a smacking kiss on each cheek. “Actually, we were just talking about how ugly you were.”
Hunter let out a deep chuckle. “That cuts deep coming from you, Bell.”
There was a prickling sensation on the back of my neck as I stepped down from my perch. I scanned my surroundings, my gaze catching on Ford. A muscle in his cheek ticked wildly. Lacey reached out a hand, settling it on his biceps. I couldn’t watch, it burned something deep in my belly as if acid were festering there.
I startled at the hand on my shoulder. I must’ve been staring for longer than I thought, because Hunter was now at my side behind the bar. “What’s wrong? Is Ford giving you trouble?”
Something about the question had tears burning the backs of my eyes. I wanted to scream “yes,” say that Ford was giving me the worst kind of trouble, the kind that reminded me of how I had pined for the boy who was my sister’s. How I’d wished he were mine. I’d wanted it so badly that a part of that sixteen-year-old girl I’d been had worried that I’d willed my sister’s death into being. God, it had been so long since any of those thoughts had taken root in my mind. I thought I’d banished them for good. But all it took was Ford walking back into my life for me to realize they were still there, just simmering below the surface.
“Bell?”
I looked up into Hunter’s concerned eyes. “No, I’m fine. Ford and I made our peace.”
“Then why do you both keep looking at each other like you’re tempted to commit murder?” His gaze flicked back and forth between Ford and me, his jaw tightening. “Or…rip each other’s clothes off.”
Heat flared in my cheeks. Ford certainly didn’t want to rip off my clothes. He probably just couldn’t handle the idea of the girl he’d always looked at as a little sister talking to men. Heaven forbid. I had a sudden urge to lay one on Hunter just to make a point. And not only on his cheeks this time. “We’re just figuring out our new normal, and Ford needs to get used to the idea that I’m no longer a sixteen-year-old girl. I can handle myself.”
Hunter let out a chuckle and pulled me into a side hug. “He always was overprotective of you.”
I grumbled a few choice profanities under my breath. Ford had always gone a little over the top when looking out for me. I was pretty sure he’d threatened bodily harm to all of the boys at the high school if they were to take advantage of me. It got so bad that none of them would even talk to me for the first year. And when I’d wanted to learn to skateboard, Ford had made me promise that I’d only do it with him and then had proceeded to buy every sort of protective gear the local sporting goods store sold. I’d looked like the Michelin Man waddling out to learn that first lesson.
“Well, he needs to learn that I can take care of myself,” I grumbled.
Hunt gave me a hard squeeze and released me. “He will.” He eyed his brother. “And if he gives you any shit, just let me know, and I’ll pop him one for good measure.”
Hunter looked a little too happy at the idea of punching his brother. I grabbed his biceps, bringing his focus back to me. “We’re fine. And look how busy the bar is. That’s all on Ford.”
Hunter’s mouth pressed into a hard line as he scanned the crowd. “We’ll see if it lasts.”
I sighed. Ford and Hunter needed to make peace. For their parents, if nothing else. But I really wanted that peace for both of them. I’d have given anything for just another day with my sister, and these two idiots were squandering the second chance they had right in front of them. “Give him a shot to make this right…for me?”
Hunter’s expression gentled. “I’ll try. But only for you.” He bent, kissing the top of my head before he headed back around the bar.
I turned back to Ethan. “So, refill?”
“I think I’m good,” Ethan said, holding up his still half-full glass.
“All right. I’m going to see if Darlene needs any help on the floor. Just flag Ford down if you need another.”
Ethan grimaced, looking from Ford to Hunter and back again. He was probably debating if asking for another Jack and Coke would end in a fistfight between brothers. I really hoped not.
I wove my way through the crowded tables, flagging Darlene down. “You need any help?”
Darlene blew her bangs out of her face. “Can you get refills for table six?”
“Sure thing.” I was halfway back to the bar before I realized that table six was the group of hot guys Darlene wanted to foist on me. I groaned but filled pint glasses and placed them on a tray before heading for the table in the back corner. I studied the men as I approached. Definitely tourists. Wealthy, from the looks of things. Collared shirts and sweaters that probably cost more than I made in a night here. Darlene was right, they were good-looking, but they weren’t my type.
I unloaded the glasses, one at a time, onto the table. “Here you go, boys. Need anything else? Something to eat?” The last thing I needed was them getting shitfaced and making a scene.
A guy with sandy-blond hair and blue eyes gave me a grin. It was a smile I knew he’d used on countless women before. One that probably got him what he wanted nine times out of ten. But all I could think was that his eyes weren’t quite blue enough, and his hair was too blond. “We could actually use some tips from a local.”
I put on my polite hostess mask. “Sure, what are you looking for?”
Blondie leaned back in his chair. “Good restaurants. Places to hike. Anything that we shouldn’t miss.”
I tucked the tray under my arm. “The Mad Baker is my favorite breakfast spot. The General Stor
e has great sandwiches, and they can pack you lunches for day hikes. I’d check out the trails around the bluff and maybe do a kayaking trip for some whale watching.”
“Sounds like there’s a lot of great stuff to do around here.”
“There is. The General Store has tons of brochures for more activities, too.”
“Thanks.” The guy gave me another of those flirty smiles. “Want to take that kayak trip with us?”
Before I could open my mouth to politely decline, a heavy hand landed on my shoulder and sent shivers down my arm. “Excuse me, gentlemen. I need to steal Bell away.”
Ford steered me away from the table and back towards the hallway. I was so stunned by his move that I didn’t even fight him. But when we hit the hall, I shrugged out of his hold. “What the hell, Ford?”
His expression was relaxed, but the set of his shoulders gave him away. “I didn’t like the way those guys were looking at you.”
My mouth opened and closed like a fish on a line. “You didn’t like the way they were looking at me?”
“No.” The statement came out on a growl. “It—it was like they were undressing you with their eyes.” He could barely get the words out, as if the idea were appalling to him. He might not want me, but some men did.
I threw up my hands. “News flash, Ford, this is a bar. Guys are going to check me out. Some girls, too. I’m used to it. And I know how to handle myself. If someone gets out of line, I’ll remove them or have Hank help me do it. I don’t need you swooping in and ruining tips for the waitstaff or me.”
The muscle in Ford’s cheek flickered. “There were five of them, and one of you. It’s not safe.”
I let out a growl of my own. “I have been taking care of myself for a long freaking time. I don’t need any help doing it now.” I forced myself to ignore Ford’s flinch. “And you’re not actually my big brother, you know.”
I stormed past him, but not before I heard him mutter, “Trust me, I know.”
19
Bell
I moaned as I took a sip of the coffee. “I needed this way more than yoga this morning.”
“Yoga would probably help that black cloud following you around a lot more than loading yourself up with caffeine.”
I scowled at Caelyn. “I didn’t sleep well last night. This coffee is keeping me from murdering people.” The truth was that I’d tossed and turned all night long, replaying the argument with Ford over and over in my head. Now that I had him back in my life, I hated the idea of us being at odds. But there was so much baggage with our friendship, and part of me wondered if it was even possible for us to not blow up at each other.
Kenna tipped her face towards the early morning sun. “I’ll take caffeine over yoga any day.”
Caelyn twisted on the bench to face Kenna. “You’re even worse because you drink all that fake sugar and fat-free creamer in your coffee.”
Kenna kept her eyes closed. “Don’t start with me on that crap, C.”
“All right, you two. We each have our own ways of functioning, and let’s just leave it at that.”
Caelyn settled back in her seat, watching the boats load up for the day. “Fine.”
Kenna let out a husky laugh. “You sound like a pouting toddler. Not everyone is down for your level of healthy living.”
“I’m not that bad.”
Kenna snorted. “You won’t even let the kids have soda.”
“I occasionally let them have cane soda.”
“That’s not the same thing, and you know it.”
I grinned at my two best friends, trying to hold in my laugh. “You know, Will has a secret stash in the garage.” The poor kid had hidden candy, soda, and chips out there. When Kenna and I found out, we started adding to his supply.
Caelyn straightened in her seat. “He does not.”
Kenna choked on her laugh. “In the old army chest in the corner.”
“That little bugger.”
“Caelyn,” I warned. “Do not throw out his food. He’s fifteen, he needs a little junk in his life.”
She sagged back against the bench. “Oh, fine.” She looked back out to the water. “I did wonder why he never asked for dessert.”
“Because your idea of dessert is some all-natural carob thing.” Kenna eyed the whole-grain muffin in Caelyn’s hand.
“Hey, carob is basically chocolate.”
I held up a hand. “Not even close.”
Caelyn’s attention suddenly darted back to the dock, and she sighed. “I want to climb that man like a tree.”
I let out a strangled sound that was part laugh and part cough. “What?” I followed her line of sight to a hulking frame striding down the dock. Not only was the man tall and broad, but he also wore an expression that threatened bodily harm to anyone who got in his way.
Kenna groaned. “What is it with you and the brooders?”
Caelyn shrugged. “Their waters look smooth and quiet, but they always pack a punch.”
I shook my head as I watched the man disappear into the marina shop. “I think it’s probably a good idea for you to stay away from Griffin Lockwood.”
“Why?”
The look of hopeful innocence on Caelyn’s face was reason enough right there. She always thought she’d be the woman to fix the broken guys, and it had burned her more than once. But she didn’t need me to remind her of any of that. I forced a smile. “Because he could eat you.”
Caelyn waggled her eyebrows. “Maybe I want him to.”
“Gross. I do not need to hear about that,” Kenna groused.
“No, you just need some sexual exploits of your own.”
Kenna turned to face me. “I think we should talk about Bell’s love life.”
The mask slipped over my features without me consciously putting it in place. “I have no love life currently, you know that.”
“Hmmmm.” Kenna drummed her fingers along the side of her coffee cup. “So, what about the scene last night at The Catch?”
My spine stiffened. “Who told you about that?”
“I ran into Crosby when I was getting our coffees. He was at the bar last night, for too long judging by his rumpled state this morning.” Kenna let out a little huff.
“What did he say?”
Little worry lines appeared between Kenna’s brows. “He told me Ford pulled you away from a table full of guys. Said he didn’t look too happy about the attention they were paying you.”
This was the problem with living on a teeny-tiny island. Everyone knew everyone else. And they all loved spreading gossip. I was going to pour salt in Crosby’s beer the next time I served him. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to share what had happened with Kenna and Caelyn—I told them everything—it was just that I hadn’t wrapped my head around it yet.
Caelyn took a sip of her tea. “Ford does seem pretty protective of you.”
“Yeah, like a little sister,” I grumbled into my coffee.
“And the problem with that is?” Kenna asked.
Caelyn reached around me to smack Kenna’s knee. “You know what the problem is.”
Of course they already knew. They’d known since the day I first started having those butterflies take flight in my belly when Ford was around. They’d listened to my fears that I’d never feel for anyone the way I felt about him. And they’d held me as I sobbed when I learned that he was gone for good. So, of course, they knew those feelings wouldn’t just up and vanish.
“Maybe I need to sign up for one of those online dating sites or apps.” It’s not like I had dated a lot in college and after, and it had to partially be a numbers game. If I put myself out there enough, there had to be someone who’d make my skin tingle and my soul feel at peace the way Ford did. I just hadn’t tried hard enough to find them.
“Are you trying to get murdered?”
“Kenna,” Caelyn scolded.
“What? Those places are a breeding ground for serial killers and sexual predators.”
I grimaced. “I’
ll be safe. Meet in a public place, not give out my phone number.”
“Everything’s searchable these days, Bell.”
“We could double.” I looked to Caelyn. “Or triple?”
Caelyn held up her hands. “Oh, no. You’re not dragging me into this. I’m perfectly happy with my fantasy life with Griffin the Greek god.”
I grinned at her but underlying it was just a hint of worry. The last thing she needed was to build that broody man up in her mind to something he wasn’t. “Okay, fine. But I have to try something, and it’s not like there are a lot of options on an island of fifteen hundred people.”
Kenna turned in her seat so she was facing me, tucking one long leg under her. “What’s with the sudden desperate urge to date?”
Emotion clogged my throat. “I have to get over him. I thought I was. For the past eleven years, all I’ve felt was anger.” Anger and maybe a little sadness for all that I’d thought Ford had thrown away. “But all it took was one look at him in the flesh to know I’d been lying to myself all along.”
I looked out at the ocean, dark gray waters rippling and swirling. “At first, I was still so angry with him. He’d betrayed me. Spit on the bond we had. Left me in my worst moment. But when I realized what was happening, how much he’d been hurting, what my parents had done…I didn’t have any anger left.”
“I still can’t believe they pulled that crap,” Kenna muttered.
Caelyn made a hushing sound at Kenna, sensing that I needed to get this all out now. “When I didn’t have my anger to hold on to, all I had left was my longing. That and my guilt.”
“Oh, Bell.” Caelyn wrapped an arm around me, squeezing in close.
“I thought maybe he’d turned into a fancy asshole in LA. But at the end of our shift, I saw him wrapping up the extra food to send home with Darlene. He knows she has two kids at home, and her ex is so far behind on child support it’s ridiculous. He’s kind to all the staff, he’s working his ass off, and dammit, I missed him. I missed talking to him about the important stuff and about the things that don’t matter. I thought I might’ve blown that out of proportion in my mind, romanticized it or something, but I didn’t.”
Reckless Memories Page 12