Amanda appeared in the doorway behind me. I turned to see her face. She looked concerned. Her voice was weak and careful
“Is everyone okay..?” she said.
Luke moved to the door and took Amanda by her shoulder.
“We need to leave these two to it. Come on,” said Luke.
“No you don’t, Luke. You don’t need to do that at all,” I said.
“Yes we do!” Luke shouted and pulled the door against the jamb. It was almost closed. But I’m glad it wasn’t. I wanted people to hear everything that was said from here on in.
“Do you like having everyone in fear of you, Brandon? Look at those two running away. Is that how you like it?”
“They are my friends, Amanda.”
“You know, I’m not sure they are. Unless maybe I’m in the same category of friend as those two. Am I your friend, Brandon? You threaten me and control me, spread lies about me… is that how you treat all your friends.”
“I didn’t lie. You were fucking Ridgley, weren’t you?”
“No, I wasn’t.” Technically, that was true. Not then I wasn’t. “But you told people I did. You and Penny, working like a couple of playground gossips, slinging mud. Why did you do it, Brandon? What good can it possibly do you, hurting someone you say you care about?”
“You weren’t seeing clearly. You were acting strange. Supposed to be here with me, you’re my girl, but you’ve been screwing around. Again. Of course I’m going to react. I’m your boyfriend, I have a right to react.”
“My boyfriend? You’re not my boyfriend. You were my boyfriend when I didn’t know you. I thought you were so cool, such a nice guy, such a hero - for all of five minutes until you started changing on me. But you were the one screwing around the whole time, first with the red haired girl at the gig, and then every chance you get…”
“So you were jealous, is that it? Is that what all this song and dance is about? You’re cheating for revenge?”
“No, Brandon. It’s about your lying, two faced, cheating. It’s about how you decided to control me by losing me a job I loved, taking away my freedom, smearing my name, and turning my feelings for you from adoration into… something much worse. That’s what you did. It’s what you do. Look at Amanda. You have destroyed that girl. You destroyed her just because she cared about you.”
“What? So you like Amanda now? She hates your guts.”
I took that on board, wondering whether this hate was historical or current. I changed tack.
“It doesn’t matter. What you did, and what you do to people who care about you matters. Brandon, it’s sick. It’s wrong. You’re twisted and vicious…”
I let him chew on what I was saying.
I looked at his eyes, big and wild. He took a quick intake of breath and brushed a hand through his hair.
“You’re accusing me of what, exactly? Being a psycho? Being what, some kind of emotional retard? Am I evil now, is that it?”
Bulls eye. I don’t like hurting people as a rule. But Brandon was the closest I’d met in real life to one of those Shakespearean villains.
“Only you know for sure, Brandon. But… I think you know.”
He stared at me. He sipped his beer bottle. And then he walked past me and seized hold of the door. I thought he was going to tell me to get out. In my head I was already walking. But no, Brandon gently closed the door. And then he locked it and leaned his big frame against it.
“You said some very nasty things, Ashley. Bad things my friends would have heard. You’d better apologise.”
My heart quickened once more. I’d imagined he would have shouted at me, lost his cool, said things exposing his character to his friends. But so far, he hadn’t reacted as predicted. Until now. This looked worse.
“I’m not going to apologise Brandon. You have caused immense harm. You know it and I know it.”
He pointed at me.
“No, no, no. You’re the sick one,” he said and swilled his beer until the bottle was empty.
“You’re not turning this on me. All I’ve done since I arrived at this college was fight for the chance of achieving my dreams, Brandon. Meeting a guy along the way was supposed to be a bonus. But since you paid off my college debt, all you’ve done is hurt me, control me, and knock me down.”
“In your head. You make excuses so you can do what you like and sleep with who you want, Ashley. You’re out of control.”
He was almost convincing. It was the same as what Professor Cantor had said.
“No.”
“Yes,” he said, nodding, walking towards me, seeing me doubt myself.
“No, Brandon. You’re the one who’s out of control.”
“You little bitch. You go and screw around and now you’re trying to mess with my head.”
He moved quickly and seized my wrist. I tried to pull away from him, but he wouldn’t let go.
“Stop it. You’re hurting.”
“But you’ve hurt me, Ash. Fair’s fair now.”
He grunted and flung my arm forward. The momentum sent me onto his bed, and before I could scrabble off he was at my side. His fingers dug at the seams of my clothing, and pushed me down as I tried to stand up.
“What the hell are you doing?” I shouted, but in the chaos of emotions, I already knew. He pulled at my top, and it ripped, the buttons of my blouse flying into the air. I was in shock, but I was ready to fight. Now he clawed at my bra.
“Lay down and be a good girl, Ashley. Stop playing hard to get. It’s time for your lesson.”
He pushed so my back landed on his bed, my momentum hurling my legs in the air. I was vulnerable now. He seized his moment, and yanked my skirt down and pushed at my thighs. His touch was forceful and violent. In a moment he would be upon me and it would all be too late. Luke and Amanda would think it was a part of the same old game. Maybe they would even think Brandon had been telling the truth about me, that I was playing hard to get all along. I think Amanda would have believed it and my suffering would have been for nothing. All these thoughts flashed through my mind. I kicked wildly, I thrashed and I fought with all my strength. He pressed my body down with his overpowering strength and laughed at me. But one lashing leg got through and connected with his jaw. He stumbled back and I moved up as quickly as I could onto my knees. He plastered his hand on his chin and came at me again. I saw he was dazed. And I took all the disgust I had in my body, every scintilla of hatred and threw a punch with the whole of my body weight behind it. I threw my whole self into the punch. It was my one chance. Brandon went backwards and crashed onto the floor. I righted myself and stood up. My blouse was torn, my bra exposed. My tights were laddered and ripped, the seam on my denim broken open. There was a knock at the door. I stepped past Brandon who got onto his haunches and shook his head. I opened the door and let in the outside world of Amanda and Luke. I looked at both of them in turn. “Do I even need to tell you what he just tried to do to me?”
They were silent, Luke shaking his head, Amanda’s eyes roaming from my ripped clothes to Brandon as he slowly stood up, clutching his jaw.
“She’s lying,” he said. But I saw the look in their eyes. A picture paints a thousand words. I caught a glimpse of myself in Brandon’s mirror and saw my forehead was grazed and my legs were bruising.
I had done all I could, but there was a chance neither Luke nor Amanda would be honest with what they’d seen and heard.
“I’m going to clean up,” I said. I went straight back to the bathroom and locked the door. I pulled my iPhone out of my skirt pocket and I opened the screen on the dictation app. The red light icon was still blinking. I pressed stop. My back-up had worked. And now my plan was ‘game-on’. I took a breath and started to shake with the realisation of what I’d just been through.
Thirteen
I heard a meeting was to take place at the college two days later. Cantor was the one who told me. In spite of Ridgley’s overtures that we would be together after he lost his job, I hadn’t contacted hi
m and he didn’t contact me during the whole time. He was as good looking as they come for a forty year old guy, but now he wasn’t exactly thrilling me with his style. I guessed the job was far more important to him than he had let on, and he was willing to put me on hold if there was any chance of keeping it. I understood, but I wasn’t happy about it. Knowing that I already intended to close the door on Ridgley should have been some comfort, but it wasn’t. My memory of our time in the dusty old archive room returned to me at night, and stirred my loins a few times during those forty-eight hours. Sex with Ridgley couldn’t happen again, but when it had happened it was very good. It would be one of those memories I could quietly cherish all my days – the time I did it with the sexy Prof at Smiths College. But if I could have swapped those loin-stirring feelings and everything else that had happened just to get Cody back, I would have done it in a heartbeat. I would have done anything. But Cody was probably in seventh heaven fornicating with Joanna Laws and had long forgotten about our time in York.
I received an email the day before the meeting. It said I was to attend the second half of the meeting to give my account of what happened between me and Ridgley. Reading between the lines, I guessed this was also about Brandon too. Everything always seemed to be about Brandon. I couldn’t fathom why Smiths spent so much time on him. He was a jerk and he did them no credit whatsoever.
Three fifteen pm. The door of the Dean’s office opened, and Professor Cantor invited me in. In the corner was a woman from Student Services, her laptop open and she was taking notes of something that had just been said, probably by the Dean. Next to her was a soft-faced woman with frizzy brown hair and a couple of streaks of grey. She had serious eyes but a pleasant face. She sat on one side of the Dean’s big-ego desk, her hands folded over her knees. She wore some kind of Lanyard with the college emblem on it. Then on the other side of the desk, head bowed like a naughty schoolboy on detention was Professor Ridgley. Cantor sat opposite the Dean beside an empty chair. The old man smiled and indicated that I should take the seat. I sat down and nodded a greeting to the Dean. He made a weak acknowledgement of my presence, and then pointed his face at some paper he had in front of him. The Dean was obviously not on my side – situation normal.
“So, Ashley. We’ve been discussing what happened between you and Mr Ridgley, who is a senior member of our teaching staff on the English Faculty. You will be aware of the rumours gathering strength among the student body that you and Professor Ridgley had an intimate encounter last Tuesday. The allegation is that you and Mr Ridgley were caught in a compromising sexual situation at a time when the English Department was supposed to be closed for business, a time when teachers should have been engaged in lesson preparation, marking, or had gone home. The bare facts mean we must treat this with careful consideration, and with thorough discipline for those we must hold accountable. Rules were broken, lines were crossed, and this institution cannot tolerate that. We have high standards here at Smiths. Do you follow me so far, Ashley?”
“I follow you, Dean, but I’ve got to say something.”
“Then fire away. What do you wish to say at this point?”
I held his eyes firmly in mine. “I’d like to say that it’s a crock of shit.”
The woman doing the dictation looked up at me and then at the Dean. The Dean nodded and she typed. The woman with the frizzy hair smiled benignly and raised an eyebrow. She didn’t seem as establishment as I guessed after all.
“It’s a ‘crock’… why is it a ‘crock’, Ashley. Do enlighten us. If there’s not a single grain of truth in all of this and we are simply wasting our time, then we may as well go and get on with our lives, eh?” Sarcasm dripped from his words. Ben Stiller would have been ashamed of his lookalike.
“This allegation came from Brandon Lynes and his friend Penny Alborough. They were spreading the rumours after Brandon had me followed to Professor Ridgley’s office.”
“You were, what did you say, ‘tailed’?” said the Dean.
“No, I didn’t. I said ‘followed’. Tailed implies I watch too much TV and that I’m a fantasist. Which I am not.”
The woman with the frizzy hair grinned and rubbed her nose to hide a slight smile.
“But you were discovered locked in a room with Professor Ridgley, weren’t you?” said the woman.
“Hold on. I want to know what has been discussed so far and who these people are before I say another thing.”
The Dean looked irritated, but he nodded. “Introduce yourselves, please.”
“Bonnie Davis, Student Welfare Support Officer,” said the frizzy woman with a friendly smile.
“Yvonne Wilson, Student Services Administrator,” said the other woman, an older blonde in very thick glasses.
“You know the others, of course.”
I looked at Ridgley. He looked like he was in pain, probably because I had taken on the infallible overlord of the college. Tom looked at me, but his smile was pained and his eyes weren’t bright as they usually were.
“As for our discussions… I think it’s better if we heard your version first, Ashley.”
In my peripheral vision I noticed Tom make the slightest nod. He meant for me to tell the truth, so that was what I would do… up until the part where we met again in the dusty archive room.
“We were attracted to each other,” I spoke to Bonnie Davis, needing her benign face as opposed to the Dean’s imperious looks. “I went to speak to him about my troubles with Brandon Lynes, who bullied me, threatened me, threatened Cody Barnes, and told me that he had the power to have me kicked out of this college…”
The Dean interjected. “Brandon Lynes, the young man who you live with as your current sexual partner.”
My head swept round. “You’re wrong Dean and you’re out of order. My sexual relations are off limits here. What matters is that I went to see the Professor since he saw that I was suffering because Brandon Lynes was emotionally abusing me, threatening me…”
“Come on!” said The Dean, making a dismissive gesture with his hands.
“No, hold on here. This bears a direct relation to why I had a meeting with Professor Ridgley.”
“Can we hear her, please? That’s why I’m here after all…” said Bonnie Davis. The Dean’s jaw swelled and tightened, but he acquiesced to let me speak.
“I never denied we were attracted to each other. But that’s why Professor Ridgley paid enough attention to notice that I was in a bad place. I wasn’t happy, and I hadn’t been for weeks because Brandon Lynes had been coercing me by using threats against the people I care about. I don’t have sexual relations with Brandon Lynes and haven’t had for a long while. In fact I don’t have ANY relations with Brandon Lynes, apart from being his prisoner.”
The Dean shook his head. He caught himself and stopped.
“But how can we use any of that information?” said the Dean. “It’ll be her word against his!”
“We must do something, Dean,” said Ridgley. “This situation is untenable. Miss Pearson needs our help and support,” said Professor Ridgley.
“I think you’ve already provided plenty of support, Mr Ridgley. The College will take over from here on in, I think,” said The Dean.
Bonnie Davis nodded. “You should have come to see me, Ashley. Helping students with pastoral problems is my field of work. I’m here to ensure student welfare…”
“But I never heard of you until today,” I said.
“Yes… our um, internal structure… could be better,” she said diplomatically looking at the Dean. “But at least we can help you now.”
“Yes, yes, yes. That’s all well and good. By all means take over and support Ashley towards the best solution for her. And take nothing off the table. If she has to withdraw from her course, we wouldn’t stand in her way,” said the Dean, not looking at me.
“Hold on, I’m not withdrawing from anything. I fought to get here and I’ll fight to stay…”
“I think withdrawal will not be necess
ary in this case, Dean,” said Bonnie Davis, backing me up.
“What we need to remember here, committee, is that a cardinal sin has been committed which goes against the values of this college.”
“With due respect Jonathan – a cardinal sin? What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?” said Cantor with a mirthless chuckle. “The girl fancied her Professor, and what student hasn’t taking a liking to a teacher at one time or another, even you once upon a time, who knows? She may or may not have had sexual relations with Professor Ridgley, which they deny and which there is no proof either way. So you can’t hold that against them. But what you can say is that they were in a boundary breaking situation that should not have happened.”
“And that was my fault,” said Professor Ridgley.
“Yes, it was!” said Dean Mayhew with unrestrained anger. He took a breath.
“We must come to a decision. A resolution here and now.”
“Once all the facts are considered,” countered Cantor.
“What are the facts? The only facts we have is that this young lady and Professor Ridgley had a covert sexual encounter which contravenes college rules. For that the Professor must face discipline and…” said the Dean.
“And Miss Pearson should be given the support of the college,” said Bonnie Davis, before the Dean could finish. “If she was abused by Brandon Lynes, then what happened afterwards with Professor Ridgley could be seen as a further abuse.”
“Bonnie, thank you, but what happened between Professor Ridgley and me was not any kind of abuse…” I said. Tom Ridgley winced and covered his eyes.
Bonnie Davis made a short silent chuckle.
“I mean it, Dean. If the college fails to do its proper duty by Ashley there could be serious repercussions later on. And I know you care about repercussions, Dean.”
Vengeful Heart: Fighting Heart Erotic Bad Boy Romance Series Book 3 Page 9