“Octavia, are you in the bathroom? Are you okay?”
“Yes.” She forced herself to breathe. “I’ll be right out.”
Katie was standing by the window talking on the telephone. She hung up and turned around when she heard Octavia. “I just ordered breakfast for us. I don’t know about you, but I’m famished.
“Thanks.”
“You don’t look so good,” Katie observed. “I think maybe those tequila shots were a little more than you could handle.”
“Tequila shots,” Octavia croaked. “Oh my God, no wonder I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. How many did I have?”
“I don’t know. I lost count, but the guys in the band were buying, so there was a never-ending flow of booze. Those guys can drink.”
“Did we come right back here? I mean, did we, or did I do anything else?”
Katie shook her head, “Well, neither one of us were up for much more than finding a bed to pass out in. Lucky for us Tobias and Andy and the rest of the guys made sure we got here safe and sound. They took care of us.”
“So then, how did I lose my panties?”
“You lost your panties?” Katie shook her head. “Well, my guess is you weren’t wearing any to begin with since the pants I loaned you were so tight.”
“Thank God.” Octavia breathed a sigh of relief. “I think you’re right. I wasn’t sure if I, well, you know.”
“No worries. No one took advantage of us.”
“You sound a little sad about that,” Octavia joked, noticing Katie’s wistful look.
“Well, let’s face it, one night with any of those guys would have been heaven, but I guess it just wasn’t meant to be. They were a lot more chivalrous than I would have ever imagined for a rock group.”
“You never know. You may see them again.”
“I doubt it. They were getting on a plane this morning for New York and then they’re heading to Japan. They won’t be back in the States for months, and by that time they’ll have forgotten all about us.”
“Since I can’t remember anything past getting in the limo, I doubt that I left a memorable impression. It sounds like you made a much better impression since you can at least remember partying with them. I just wish I could remember what it was like hanging out with Tobias Morgan. I had such a crush on him in high school, and what I do remember of last night is that he was still every bit as hot now as he was then.”
“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I know the guy was taken with you. You literally fell into his lap, and from that point on you two were attached at the hip. In his defense, he did tell you to slow down on the shots, but then again, he didn’t stop them from filling your glass. He seemed kind of at odds with everything, but in the end he did make sure that we made it back here safely.
“Well, I’ll just have to take your word for it.” Octavia smiled. “So, what are we going to do with the rest of the day?”
“How about doing the tour of the Liberty Bell, Constitution Hall, and just walking around the historic district before it gets dark? We still have money left on the room comp, so we could come back here for dinner. What do you think?”
“I think that’s a great idea. Let’s do it. I just need to take a couple aspirin, and I’ll feel a lot better.”
Octavia went back in her room and shut the door. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t make herself remember. What was so strange was that she had no memory at all. She would have thought she could have remembered bits and pieces, but it was like it never happened. Never in her life had she experienced this kind of memory loss, regardless of what she drank. Suddenly she felt very sad and empty. She didn’t know why, but she began to cry. She couldn’t stop herself as she lay back on the bed and hugged a pillow. An incredible loneliness overwhelmed her to the point that she was powerless to get up for a few minutes. She hadn’t felt this sad since her sister had left home. What’s wrong with me?
* * * *
The remainder of the day passed without incident. They did the tourist tour of the historic district, and even took a ride in a horse-drawn carriage that took them past Christ’s Church and other landmarks before they made their way back to the hotel where they ate dinner. Tired, they decided to go bed early. They wanted to be on the road before noon and home early so they could work on their homework. Mathieu called before they left the hotel, and they talked for a while. He said he was coming back on Saturday morning and that her sister, Evenela, was hounding him to bring her back with him to Boston for a visit. She wanted to visit Evenela, but she needed to talk with her parents about her Klawinken heritage first.
Katie was a magpie on the trip home. She couldn’t stop talking about the concert and going out with Naked Dreamer afterward. Octavia listened, hoping something Katie said would jar her memory. Every time she pushed herself to remember, the feeling of sadness she had experienced at the hotel came back, bringing tears to her eyes. It was as if she had lost a lot more than just her memory. Luckily, Katie was too busy driving and talking to take notice.
At home, her parents asked her how everything went. She regaled them with the highlights, leaving out meeting the band backstage. They knew she had homework, so when she went to her room with a sandwich instead of sitting down for dinner, they understood. She did need to study, but she still felt dead inside and she needed to be alone. She decided to use her MP3 player and listen to some Naked Dreamer. She began to listen to it, but for some unknown reason Tobias Morgan’s voice didn’t sound the way she remembered. She actually found his voice somewhat distasteful. She turned it off.
That night, before she went to sleep, Mathieu called her, and again he mentioned visiting her sister. On the one hand, he had told her he didn’t want to pressure her, but on the other, he was beginning to sound like a broken record. She missed Mathieu, but she didn’t feel excited about his return. She knew she should be missing him a lot more than she did. Nothing felt right about her relationship with Mathieu.
She studied for a while before she finally fell asleep. When she woke, she felt as if she hadn’t slept at all. There were no dreams to remember. Her body felt cool to the touch, not like before, when she would wake overheated from a dream about Tobias Morgan. She felt so alone, and again she gave way to the unwanted tears that fell unheeded down her cheeks.
Chapter Six
“You know, Octavia, spring break is in two weeks and you promised your sister we were going to visit. She understood you didn’t want to tell your parents over the holidays, but the holidays are long gone and you have over a week off from school coming up. I think the time has come to speak with your parents and visit Boston to see Evenela.” Mathieu looked at her from across the dinner table, his face serious, his eyes locked on hers, his jaw rigid. Ever since he had returned from Boston, he had been unrelenting in his desire for her to go back with him to Boston.
“I know you’re right, and I’ve decided to tell them this weekend. I have no choice. I should have told them long before this.”
“Good,” Mathieu said, draining his glass of scotch. “That makes me happy, and it’s going to make your sister very happy.”
“How I hate the thought of telling them. It will only hurt them,” she said, unable to keep the regret of what she had to do from her voice. “They’ll know that you and I have mated already and that Evenela has been back in my life without their knowledge. If only I could spare them the details. They are going to feel so betrayed.”
“They need to know the truth regardless of how they react. Remember, they betrayed you by not telling you the truth about your real parents.”
“They only did it to protect me. My parents must have given them reason to believe they were doing the right thing. They did ask them to bring me up as their own. Let’s not forget that.” Unlike Mathieu and Evenela, she didn’t see her parents as the bad guys. Mathieu just grunted, shaking his head. She could see he was not happy with her. They finished their meal in silence. She was lost in thought about ho
w she was going to tell her parents that she knew they weren’t her biological parents and the circumstances surrounding her newfound knowledge.
“I want you in my bed tonight, Octavia,” Mathieu stated firmly after the waiter had walked away with his credit card. “We need to be together. We can’t continue to deny ourselves what for me is as necessary and natural as the air we breathe. Our mating will help give you the strength you need for the coming days.”
“I thought you weren’t going to pressure me?”
“I thought I wouldn’t have to, and the fact that you feel I’m pressuring you just adds to my confusion about who you really are.”
“What do you mean, who I really am?”
“You don’t act like you’re my one true mate, Octavia. I keep looking for the acceptance and love that should be in your eyes, and I don’t see it.” He shook his head, his eyes snapping with anger. “You should love me, Octavia, and want to share my bed. Telling your parents about us and that you know you’re Klawinken should not be that difficult. I feel like you dread the thought of both things equally, and that not only goes against everything Klawinken, it goes against me.”
“I can’t help the way I feel. You’re not being fair.” Octavia felt her own anger rising. She didn’t like it that he was bullying her.
“Not being fair,” he said, his tone low, his eyes furious. “I’ve been more than fair. It’s you who are not being fair. You are my mate. Either you act like it or it’s over between us. I can’t do this anymore.”
“Mathieu.” Octavia sat back in her chair, wondering why he was suddenly being so obstinate and unyielding. This was so unlike him. Or was it? “You can’t be serious. What’s changed? You’ve never spoken to me like this before.”
“Tell me something, Octavia, and I want the truth. Have you ever dreamed of me?”
“Mathieu, I’m sorry I’m not responding the way you think I should. It’s not that I’m not attracted to you, because I am. I mean, what woman wouldn’t be. Look at you.” Her eyes softened. “You’re gorgeous.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“You know I’m different. You said so yourself.”
“I guess you just answered my question. And as far as looks are concerned, they truly are only skin deep. With the Klawinken, it’s a mating of the soul. It’s not just physical. It wouldn’t matter to me what you looked like. Your soul would shine from within you, and you would be beautiful to me.” His eyes looked deeply into hers. “It’s not like that for you, is it, Octavia?”
How she hated the thought of hurting Mathieu. However, the time to be honest had come and gone more than once, and this time she was going to do the right thing. She was going to tell Mathieu the truth.
“I don’t know why I haven’t dreamed of you Mathieu, the way you dreamed of me. I did dream, and they were erotic dreams, but they were of another who doesn’t exist except in my dreams. It’s not fair to you that I desire a dream when you are here and I know you love me. Something went wrong, Mathieu. Something went very wrong with your Klawinken dreams of your one true mate.”
Mathieu just sat looking at her for what seemed like forever, before he stood up and walked away from her, not looking back. She followed behind him to the front of the restaurant where their waiter gave him back his credit card. He handed the man his tip. In silence they walked out of the restaurant and to Mathieu’s car, where he opened the door for her and then slammed it shut behind her.
He slid into the driver’s seat and put on his seat belt. Without looking at her, he started the car before he said, “You’ve broken my heart and shattered my soul. I can’t see you again. I’m going to ask the Klawinken Council to erase you from my dreams and to exorcise you from my soul.”
“Mathieu, please,” she sobbed. She couldn’t bear to see him like this.
“I want to forget you.”
“Can they really do that?”
“I don’t know. I’ve heard that they can help those who have lost their loved ones to dull the ache of loss. I’m hoping they can help me because I need to forget you. I want to forget you!”
“I don’t know what to say.” Octavia wanted to take his pain away, to tell him she didn’t mean any of it, but that would only make things worse because she knew now without a shadow of doubt that she couldn’t be what he wanted. He deserved so much better.
“Of course you don’t. I curse the day I ever dreamed of you.”
“Oh, Mathieu,” she cried. “I’m so sorry. I wish my dreams had been of you. You don’t know how much I wish that.”
“But they were of another. Who is he?”
“It doesn’t matter. He’s not real. He’s just a figment of my imagination.”
Mathieu pulled the car over into an empty parking lot and turned off the ignition. His whole body was stiff, tense, and his eyes were wild when he turned to look at her. “Were they of Tobias Morgan?”
Octavia could feel the blood drain from her face. She began to tremble. This wasn’t happening. How could Mathieu know?
“Answer me,” he demanded, releasing his seat belt, his body moving toward her. She had never once felt fear where Mathieu was concerned, but at this moment, her heart was in her throat. “Answer me,” he yelled louder, causing her to lean back against the passenger door. His anger was palatable. It surrounded him. She felt as if she could almost touch it.
“Yes, they were of Tobias Morgan,” she whispered. “He’s a rock star I had a crush on in high school. How did you know?”
“Son of a bitch,” he said. “Motherfucker. I’ll kill him. I swear I’m going to kill the bastard.”
“You know him,” she choked out.
“Know him. Yes, of course I know him. I know all the Klawinken in our area, including the infamous Morgans.”
“Oh my god,” was all she could say. “He’s Klawinken.”
“He warned me he was going to fuck you, but I didn’t believe he’d actually do it, knowing you were mine. But then again, he’s always gotten what he wanted. How could I have been so stupid?”
“Mathieu, none of this makes sense. I’ve only been with him in my dreams. They weren’t real.”
“He fucked you in those so-called dreams, didn’t he?”
“But not until after you and I mated, and only in my dreams. I mean, before that it was only erotic dreams that never went further than foreplay.” She couldn’t believe she was telling Mathieu her deepest secrets. But what choice did she have after his revelation? Tobias was Klawinken, and he had come to her in her dreams and for some reason he had told Mathieu. The concert, her falling into his lap, it wasn’t coincidence. All of it was planned. He had been playing with her, laughing at her, knowing she thought their lovemaking was nothing more than her overactive imagination. She thought she was going to be sick.
“He’s always been an asshole,” Mathieu spit out. “Well, you can have him if he wants you, and that I doubt. He just wanted what wasn’t his, and as soon as he finds out I don’t want you anymore, you won’t see him again. That I guarantee. You’ll never hold on to a man like that. He doesn’t believe in the concept of a one true mate. He used you, Octavia, and you let him.”
“I can’t believe this is happening. I didn’t ask to dream of him. I didn’t want to dream of anyone. I didn’t ask to be Klawinken.”
“No, you didn’t, and you know what, maybe you can just live your life being who you were. I really don’t care anymore. The fact is, I can’t stand the sight of you.” He started the car and pulled back out into the highway.
“What are you going to do, Mathieu? I mean, are you going to confront him?”
“I won’t have to. He’s gone too far this time. The Klawinken Council will take care of him.”
“What do you mean?”
“Not your problem, Octavia. Just go back to your parents and your little piece of the human world you hold so dear. Forget you’re Klawinken. You’ll be doing everyone a favor.”
“Evenela won’t feel
that way.”
“She’ll do what she’s told. She values her Klawinken heritage. She won’t want to be shunned.”
“Shunned?” she asked as they pulled into her parent’s driveway.
“Tobias is fairly powerful, and whatever they do, I’m sure somehow the bastard will come out of it with nothing more than a wrist slap. You, on the other hand, are like a distant cousin that nobody knows or really cares about. The Council is powerful, and I’ve heard they can suppress the gifts of those who misuse them. When they’re done with you, your only link to the Klawinken will be the birthmark on your neck.”
“Mathieu, please, you can’t do this. None of this is my fault.”
“You’re weak, Octavia. I knew it from the start, but I refused to see the truth. You’re not a true Klawinken, not in the way that counts. He wouldn’t have been able to infiltrate your dreams so easily. It may not be your fault, but it’s who you are. You’re more your mother’s child than I had thought. Now, I’d like you to get out of my car.”
“What do you mean, more my mother’s child than you thought?”
“Your mother was Beaucomp, a whore. That’s why she and your father were drunk that night they died. Your father found out the truth. I’m sure you’ll dream of many other men before you’re through, just don’t ever marry. I’m just glad I know the truth now. Good-bye, Octavia.”
With a sob, she opened the car door and ran into her house. Her mother was sitting at the kitchen table.
“You’re home already?”
Octavia couldn’t speak. Her mother saw her tears and said, “What happened?”
When Octavia just stood in the doorway, her mother came to her and wrapped her arms around her. “Did you and Mathieu quarrel?”
She shook her head as her mother held her close awhile. “It’s over,” she finally choked out.
“Now, dear, you only think that. I’m sure things will look better tomorrow. All couples squabble now and then. It’s normal.”
Rosewood, Natalie - Octavia's Choice [The Klawinken 2] (Siren Publishing Classic) Page 5