She needed a distraction.
Anna reached forward and turned the radio up, flipping through the stations in some vain attempt to find actual music instead of commercials or talking.
Finally, the soothing sounds of an alternative rock band filled the car and Anna smiled softly. Yes, this was much better.
The peaceful feeling didn’t last long, however. As soon as the song ended, Anna immediately regretted stopping on this station.
“I just don’t see it, Dave. What is the sense in monogamy? I mean, seriously—it isn’t even human nature.” She wanted to turn it off the moment she heard his voice, but for whatever reason, she couldn’t do it.
“Oh, boy. Here we go with another anti-love rant from the infamous doctor Whitman.” Another guy said, his tone sarcastic. “Okay, Drew. Let’s hear today’s sermon.”
“I’m being serious.” Drew told his co-host. Dave and Drew in the Morning was easily the most popular morning radio show in the Columbus area. Everyone listened to the duo, bantering back and forth.
Everyone except Anna. She usually made a point of avoiding the early morning talk show. Not because she didn’t find them entertaining or even funny. She even enjoyed the music.
She just couldn’t stand listening to Drew.
“Oh, I know you are.” Anna could hear Dave’s quiet laughter in the background.
“It just seems like such a big waste of energy. You put so much time and effort into making some girl happy—and for what? For her to break up with you the very night you plan on proposing?” Anna felt her cheeks flare once again, suddenly very certain to avoid making eye contact with other nearby drivers.
“That is kind of harsh, dude.” Dave agreed.
“That’s what I’m saying. Plus, I mean, imagine how many other girls this guy could have had. I know all you ladies out there are probably calling me a pig right now, but it goes both ways. I’m not saying that it’s only a guy’s right to play the field. I say it goes both ways. Monogamy, relationships…just such a waste of time. Humans weren’t made for love. They were made for passion.”
Well, Drew had one thing right at least. “Pig,” she muttered under her breath as she reached forward and stabbed at any button on the radio, eager to be rid of him.
He hadn’t changed a bit since college, that much was obvious.
She remembered their first meeting, once again blushing. She quickly turned her blush into a scowl though, remembering how angry she’d been with him.
She was even more angry seven years later, no longer caught up in his confidence and charm.
That was Drew Whitman for you. Always running his mouth.
Radio broadcasting had been the perfect career choice for him.
It was hard to believe that she and Jeff had met only because of Drew. She remembered, after the night of the party, she and Drew had begun to bump into each other all over the place. Concerts, campus, even the library.
Somehow, he had convinced her to meet him for coffee at a local café. They had run into Jeff there, and the rest…
The rest had led her here, to this very place. She sighed as she pulled into her normal parking place, running her hand through her hair.
Well, regardless of what had happened in her personal life, she could at least be thankful for her vocational life. Even though the next few hours would be spent pouring over paperwork and budgets, she couldn’t deny the little thrill working it’s way through her.
This she could be proud of.
The idea had come to her during her senior year of high school. She had, as usual, been involved with the wrong guy. They had been busted for underage drinking and she had been sentenced to community service.
Anna had found her way here, to this very community center, where she had begun working with kids much younger than herself—most of them forced to be here by their parents and very few there by choice.
It wasn’t as if she could really blame them. The community center had been severely lacking in even the most basic needs for entertainment. They’d had a few old, warped basketballs, a TV that only played VHS, and a pretty ragged library. Outside wasn’t much better, with only one set of swings and a sandbox Anna was almost afraid to touch. Not to mention the dark, dank décor…
As she breezed through the doors, she immediately felt her mood improve.
She had continued to work with the community center long after she’d completed her required hours, bettering things little by little. She was proud to see all of the changes she had helped bring about the place. At first, it had only been little things—like paint, a few new basketballs, an old foosball table she had talked a frat house into donating.
But eventually, she began to set her sites much higher.
An updated entertainment center had been next, including a stereo, DVD player with a library of DVDs, and a room of furniture. She had scoured the campus then, begging for any and all donations.
Once she graduated college, the community center had brought her on as a full time employee. Anna had by then decided that she was going to make the community center a place kids actually wanted to hang out. Her neighborhood had been steadily declining since she was a kid, and things seemed to be at an all-time low. She wanted to give kids an alternative to that lifestyle.
She smiled at the posters hanging on the walls, advertising various activity nights. They hosted movie nights every Friday and Saturday night, some sort of a dance in the gym at least once a month, and basketball games throughout the week. She’d also instituted a tutoring program and had somehow convinced the city to give her the okay for internet access—so long as she could come up with the computers.
The next battle was her biggest one so far.
She had already asked for a daycare to be added to the center—but in addition to that, she had decided that she wanted these kids to have the opportunity to find a creative outlet.
She had planned to build them a studio.
“Hey, Anna, how was your weekend?” One of her co-workers asked as she passed through the employee lounge.
“Oh, it was great,” she told the younger woman with a forced smile. She could hear Drew’s voice sounding from the radio just a few feet away from her. He was no longer talking about her, so that was a plus. “How about yours?”
“Oh, you know, same ol’, same ol’. Mikey’s got an ear infection, so that’s a joy.” The young woman, Crystal, rolled her eyes to show her sarcasm. “But I finally printed some adorable shots of him playing in the snow with the puppy. Remind me to show you them later on!”
“You know I can’t pass up on adorable baby and puppy pictures,” Anna grinned and Crystal laughed, nodding her head. She was at least five years younger than Anna, somehow managing working at the community center almost full-time, raising a toddler on her own, and still trying to finish her degree.
And she just got a new puppy for Christmas.
Anna couldn’t help but admire her.
“Oh, and I left those quotes from my brother on your desk. He said that’s about the lowest he could go.”
“Thanks so much, Crystal! I’ll take a look at them as soon as I get settled in here.”
She poured hot water into her mug and slipped back down the hall, finally sitting down at her desk. The first thing she did was pull open one of the drawers and dig out a packet containing her usual morning tea.
Next, she turned on some music, this time opting for the mp3 player rather than risking having to listen to Drew Whitman rant about her again.
What business was it of his anyway? Okay, so Jeff was his best friend. So what?
And it hadn’t gone exactly the way Drew had made it seem. It wasn’t as if Anna had ripped Jeff’s heart out and stomped on it. As soon as Jeff calmed down and actually gave it some thought, he would realize that it hadn’t exactly come out of nowhere. The distance between them had been growing for some time now, even before it became literal distance instead of only just figurative.
And what did
Drew know about love anyway? He was even worse than Alice when it came to having an actual relationship.
Anna took a deep breath and exhaled loudly before taking a sip from her tea.
Concentrate, Anna Marie.
She opened her eyes and set her mug aside, ready now to delve into business-as-usual.
~*~
Anna had always loved the arts. Whether it was painting, drawing, music, dance…she loved it all. She assumed she’d gotten it from her Nana, as she had lived her entire life as an artist. Whenever Anna was upset or distraught over something, she could lose herself in a drawing or a certain song, and usually, it helped.
Alice was the same way, the two of them artists at their core. It was what had always kept them so close, Anna had thought. After she’d graduated high school, Anna had gone to school planning to major in art—until she realized what she actually wanted to do. Alice had gone off on a cross-country trip, somehow ending up in Europe for almost a year before finally returning home with a purpose.
But now, with the economy such a disaster, Anna was devastated to see the arts disappearing from schools. She and her sister had benefited so much from those programs, as broad as they may have been.
It was this decision that had led her to her latest, and largest, of goals.
The art studio.
She knew this was going to be difficult to get through. The city had already eliminated the programs from the curriculum, which made clear to her where they stood on the subject.
But Anna knew that if she could only show them what a benefit to the community it would be—how much of a difference it could make for these kids, who had no outlet for their anger or frustration…
She knew it could make a difference.
Convincing the city…well, she would do whatever it took.
Even if it meant working all day and all night.
Okay, so her efforts weren’t entirely selfless, she acknowledged as she walked to her car later that week.
It was probably easier for her to lose herself in her work now than it was to lose herself in a drawing, her inspiration having been lacking for quite awhile now. Anytime she sat down to put pencil to paper, she froze.
And besides, putting her energy into researching statistics and looking for grants was a lot more efficient than staring at a blank page while thoughts of Jeff overwhelmed her.
He was just such a good guy. He didn’t deserve…
Anna stopped herself short, unwilling to carry that thought any further.
After tonight, she would be done with it all. She glanced in the backseat, the box of various CD’s and books and even a few items of clothing causing a rush of memories to wash over her.
They’d had a lot of good times together, she and Jeff.
But they were better off this way. Jeff deserved someone who he could be happy with. And Anna…well, she only hoped that she hadn’t made a huge mistake letting him go.
After all, he had been the only guy who hadn’t treated her like garbage their entire relationship. He didn’t cheat on her, he didn’t take advantage of her—he never even fought with her.
How had she not been happy? What kind of a demented freak was she?
She sighed softly.
Jeff had never really been her type. Where she had always gone for the tall, dark, rebel-without-a-cause type, Jeff was fair-haired and bright-eyed, his entire life planned out for him. He came from a family of lawyers and there was no way he was going to deviate.
And that had been exactly what had attracted her. The fact that he was the polar opposite of everything her heart seemed to crave.
Jeff was safe. He wasn’t going to hurt her—not like the others had.
As they got to know one another, she found he was just as easy to love as he was to get along with.
But now, she realized that it wasn’t love their relationship had been lacking in—but passion.
She stared up at the building in front of her, part of her almost disappointed to see a light on in his apartment.
Well, she might as well get it over with.
She sighed, opening the door and grabbing the box. She could do this.
She pressed the button that would call his apartment and waited a long moment for his voice to greet her. But instead, all she got was the angry buzzing sound, signaling the door had been unlocked.
Anna pushed on the handle and then made her way up the stairs, her heart thumping wildly in her chest as her nerves got the best of her.
This is for the best, she repeated over and over again.
Finally, she reached his door and she somehow managed to knock while still holding the box. “It’s open,” Drew called.
She glared at the door, wishing Drew could somehow be on the receiving end instead of the door, as she struggled with the knob. When she entered, he looked up, surprise clearly displayed on his face.
“Oh, it’s you.”
“Sorry to disappoint.” Surely he had been expecting some six-foot-two blonde model-type to walk through his door—not the five-foot-three, average-Anna. She sighed beneath his gaze, waiting for him to say something. When after at least a minute or two had passed, Anna glanced down at the box, as if asking where she should set it. It was a lot heavier now that she’d been holding on to it for awhile.
“Oh, you can just set it there,” he gestured to the floor beside her. “That all of it?” Anna only nodded, feeling very awkward in Drew’s presence without Jeff around. It wasn’t as if they were friends or anything. “Kinda funny how seven years boils down to a box of junk.”
“Yep, it’s a real knee slapper.” She hoped he didn’t notice the sound of unshed tears in her voice as she crossed her arms over her chest.
“So what’s next on the agenda, you little heartbreaker, you?” His tone was teasing, but that didn’t make the comment any less hurtful. Anna stared at him for a moment before speaking, unable to hold back.
“Look, Drew, I know you think I’m a bitch. But you don’t know what happened. So I’d appreciate it if you’d cut me just a little bit of slack. It’s not like I wanted to hurt him.”
Damn it, she swore silently as a tear slipped down her cheek. Crying in front of Drew Whitman. That was a brilliant idea.
“Anna, I—”
“Just forget it,” she shook her head, suddenly very anxious to get away from him. “Can you just make sure he gets that? I think we can both be happy that, after this, we’ll never have to see each other again.”
“Hey, Anna, I didn’t—”
But she would have none of it. She held up her hand and shook her head. “Don’t worry about it, Drew. I’m sure you didn’t mean anything by it.” He stepped toward her, as if he might reach out to her, but she couldn’t do it. She stepped back toward the door, a hand resting on the knob.
She’d already made an ass of herself by crying in front of him. She wasn’t about to let him see her break down completely.
Which was exactly what would happen if she let him comfort her.
Because when Jeff’s best friend was trying to make her feel better for breaking up with Jeff…well, that’s when she would know she was in bad shape.
“Do me a favor?” She asked before she stepped through the door.
“What’s that?”
“Just tell him I’m sorry.”
“He knows, Anna.” And as she nodded her head, she could feel the sobs building up inside her. She managed a sad smile before she ducked through the door and dashed down the stairs, rushing back to her car and shoving the keys in the ignition.
A slow, sad song played on the radio. A song of goodbye.
And Anna let it all wash over her, a few quiet sobs and a dozen tears.
It was time to let go.
~*~
Drew was an ass. Usually he wasn’t so ready and willing to admit this fact, even just to himself.
But tonight, he’d outdone himself.
Yep, tonight, he’d really pulled out all the stops.
Okay, that wasn’t entirely accurate. He hadn’t even said that much to Anna. But apparently, it hadn’t taken much.
He thought about the tears in her eyes.
Once before, many years ago, it seemed, he had been drawn to her because of those tears. Tonight had been no different. The moment he realized what was happening, he immediately had the urge to impose a bit of punishment upon the person who had caused her any pain.
But seeing as how he couldn’t really kick his own ass, Drew had decided to settle for a nice scotch and some self-loathing before bed.
When that didn’t work, he pulled out his phone and called the only person he thought might be able to make him feel a little bit better.
“Hey, man, what’s going on?”
“Your girlfriend stopped by tonight.” Might as well dive right in.
“Anna?” Drew imagined Jeff pinching the bridge of his nose.
“The one and only.” Drew took another sip from his glass. “She dropped your stuff off. Looks like a bunch of junk to me, though.”
“How was she?” Shouldn’t Drew be the one asking how Jeff was? Hadn’t he been the one to have his heart broken?
Drew thought about his response for a long moment, wondering what he should tell Jeff. He could lie and say that she was nothing but smiles and giggles. Maybe he could even say she made a play for him.
Right, like Jeff would believe that.
“She’s…she started crying, man.” The words were out of his mouth before he had the chance to think twice about it. “I didn’t even say anything—”
“You always say something, Drew.” Jeff sighed on the other end of the phone. Drew felt the guilt wash over him, knowing his friend was right.
“I might have implied that she was a…” He paused, reluctant to even repeat what he had said. It wasn’t as if it had been that bad. “A heartbreaker of sorts.”
He shook his head, now officially ashamed of himself.
“Oh, Drew…I don’t know how you get by with your foot permanently lodged in that mouth of yours.” Jeff sighed again and Drew swore he could almost hear his best friend rubbing his temple.
Single, Available, and Completely Attached Page 3