This latest deceit felt even worse. Instead of coming clean, he’d lied again, faked her illness, and was even planning on using it for the party so he’d still have a chance to make the cabin his.
They wanted to leave the cabin to someone who would have a family someday. Now he was faced with that very real future and he had no idea if he even wanted it. Did he want a future with Olivia and the baby?
He was a poor excuse for a grandson and an even worse human being.
He had to tell his grandparents the truth. It didn’t matter if they gave him the cabin anymore. The only thing that mattered was making things right with Olivia. Maybe if he admitted the truth about his feelings for her to himself, to her, and to his family, he’d be able to salvage their relationship before he lost her and the baby forever.
Chapter Twenty-One
Sawyer slumped in a deck chair and downed his first shot. There’d be many more of these before the party was over, but it was early and he needed to pace himself. Being a slobbering drunk wasn’t an option. As much as he wanted to let the alcohol numb his pain, he had to face this moment head on, sober.
Another week had gone by and Olivia still hadn’t contacted him. Obviously his heartfelt apologies on her voicemail weren’t enough. Aidan hadn’t spoke to him since their fight on the field either. He’d called them both, multiple times, but hadn’t gotten through to either of them. Seemed Olivia wasn’t ready to forgive him and his friend was following her lead.
He’d even shown up at the apartment but wasn’t allowed up. Waiting outside during times when he thought they’d be coming or going hadn’t done any good either. Somehow they always managed to elude him.
In one half-baked scheme, he’d destroyed a lifelong friendship, was about to alienate himself from his family, and managed to lose the only woman he’d ever loved.
Bravo. Brav-fucking-o.
“You look in good spirits today,” Tyler said, before bursting into deep belly laughter. “I can’t even say that with a straight face. She’s gone, isn’t she? Left you high and dry when you needed her the most.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He planned on telling the truth but the thought that Tyler would get to hear it first disgusted him. “Why don’t you be a good father and go cuddle your baby.”
“I did that already. In front of Gran. Besides, Misha is eating and I can’t exactly help with that part.”
The end was near and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it. He’d have to suck it up and let go. He’d still have the memories of his family, with or without the cabin. Besides that, after bringing Olivia here, he wasn’t sure he could picture himself at the cabin without her. Every time he thought about coming here in the future, she infiltrated his thoughts. And not only her—the baby, too, a tiny Sawyer-Olivia hybrid, toddling around on the beach, splashing in the waves, sleeping in the back bedroom that he would convert into a nursery. Coming here now would remind him of everything he’d lost.
“Enjoy it, man. I hope the money helps you out with Misha.”
Tyler’s smile wavered. “You’re giving up?”
Sawyer shrugged. “I’m done. You win. Embrace it.” He grabbed a beer and left Tyler stunned.
“If everyone could gather around please,” spoke someone into the microphone. “Grandma and Grandpa Sterling would like to make an announcement before we cut the cake.”
Instantly his palms grew sweaty. He’d hoped to speak to them privately before they dealt with the cabin, but it appeared he’d lost his opportunity. Maybe it was better this way. Then everyone could hear his story firsthand instead of it filtering through the usual gossip chains, morphing into something different along the way.
Gran and Gramps took their seats at the head table. Their smiles calmed him momentarily before he remembered he would be the one who ruined their day. As they were being handed the microphone, he stepped forward, intent on saying his piece and telling the truth before they made their final decision.
Fair would be spilling Tyler’s secret to sell the cabin at the same time, but it wasn’t Sawyer’s place to say anything. And the sooner he stopped caring about the cabin the better, no matter how much it hurt to let his home go.
“Before you make your announcement, there’s something I need to say.” He stepped through the crowd. His grandparents turned to him, surprise on their faces.
“Whatever it is, I’m sure it can wait,” Tyler said, glaring at him.
“Relax. This has nothing to do with you. This is all about what I’ve done.”
“What do you mean, dear?” Gran asked, sitting forward in her chair.
“It’s about Olivia and me, and our relationship.” He paused unsure of how to say exactly what he needed to.
“Where is she? I haven’t seen her yet today. Is she still ill?”
“I’m here, Gran,” Olivia said, rushing up to the head table, her arms wide for a hug. “I’m so sorry I’m late. Traffic was terrible, and then I got lost. Really, I couldn’t be more embarrassed. I brought you these.” She thrust a bouquet of calla lilies and orchids at them.
“Thank you, dear. You’re just in time. Sawyer was about to tell us something important. About you and him. Sounds exciting.” Her eyes twinkled with excitement.
“He was? Oh, um, well, yes. Perhaps he should do that another time.” She stared at him as if trying to turn him to stone, but he wouldn’t be silenced.
In fact, the sight of her recharged him, surging him with energy and confidence. He’d waited weeks for a chance to tell her how he felt, and now he could. And she’d have to listen to him here.
“What I have to say needs to happen now.”
“Really, sweetheart, let’s not bore your family with our…issues.” She twisted her hands together as if they were the source of her discomfort. Sadly, he was the one who got that honor.
“Olivia and I aren’t really dating.”
She gasped, as did a few other people. Gran, however, looked calm as ever.
“Sawyer, really. Now isn’t the time!” Olivia’s voice had an edge of nervousness to it, but there was something else behind it too, almost as if she were holding back her emotions and nearly failing. The glistening in her eyes told him he was probably right.
“No. Now. When I found out you wanted to leave the deed for the cabin to one of us, I was thrilled. I’ve loved the cabin since I was a child. It’s where so many of my memories of my parents are. It’s the only place I really feel close to them, and it’s been the only home I’ve known since their accident.”
“We know, dear.”
“But then you said you only wanted to leave it to someone who would pass it down to their children and my hopes crumbled. Why on earth would you ever leave the cabin to a bachelor like me when your other choice is Tyler, Sophia, and Misha? I knew I was sunk. I couldn’t compete.”
He paused, taking a deep breath.
“No,” Olivia whispered, moving toward him, but Gran’s hand on her arm froze her in place.
“And then I realized I could compete if I had a relationship that might lead to something more in the future. At least, it had to look like I had a relationship. So I made Olivia an offer she couldn’t refuse.
“We were pretty convincing too. It was fun, in a way, playing the part of the loving boyfriend, bringing my girl around to family dinner so I wasn’t the only single one for a change. It felt nice. Comforting. And then it was more than that, and before I knew it, I’d fallen for her. This girl, who was only supposed to be my temporary girlfriend until after this party, wormed her way into my heart and took root there.”
The ache that had been in his chest for weeks dissipated slightly, evaporating like fog in sunshine. This was right. Telling everyone what he’d done and how he honestly felt was the thing he should have done all along.
“I know telling you this will cost me the cabin. I’ll miss the summer weekends here, the moon reflecting off the lake on a clear night, the smell of campfires, but it�
��s okay, because it’s only a place. And it’s a place that will never be the same, because now whenever I think of the cabin, I imagine Olivia there with me. But she won’t be. I screwed up.”
Tears pooled in his eyes, but he didn’t bother to try and blink them away. What was the use? There would only be more to follow. May as well give in, finally. He’d spilled his heart and soul for everyone to see, what were a few tears in the mix?
…
Was this really happening? Had she walked into an episode of some alternate reality television show?
“What the hell are you doing?” she asked in a whispered yell as she went to Sawyer’s side. “Are you out of your mind? You’ve blown any chance you had at scoring the cabin.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“So this last three months was a waste? It was all for nothing?”
“I wouldn’t say that.”
“What the hell would you say then? I’m out of a job and an apartment and now you won’t even get the cabin. Sounds like a win to me!” She scolded him, barely controlling her voice so the others around them couldn’t hear.
“Are you finished yet, Sawyer?” Gran asked.
He shrugged. “For now. I’m sorry I interrupted your announcement.”
“Quite alright. I’m glad you’ve got that off your chest. I’m sure it’s been bothering you for some time.”
Olivia hugged herself, ready for the scolding.
“As you all know, we came here to celebrate our birthdays as well as to gift the deed to the family cabin. I’m sure interest is piqued after Sawyer’s heartfelt confession. So without further ado, we’ll get on with it. When we decided to do this, we hoped to leave the place to someone who would one day pass it down through the family. And while we still hope that is the case, we have realized the person who takes over for us has to love it as much as we do. Sawyer, the cabin is yours.”
“Are you kidding me, Gran? Seriously, Gramps? He lied, and you’re giving him the cabin as a reward?” Tyler stopped short of stomping his foot but otherwise threw a temper tantrum.
“Sawyer might have lied, but his hopes for a future at the cabin were honest, which is more than I can say for the grandson who was only looking to make a few bucks,” Gramps said, speaking up for the first time.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Tyler turned a brilliant shade of crimson.
“Oh? I’m sure your real estate agent would be interested to hear that, since she’s already spending the commission she planned to earn next spring. Seems she’s got quite the mouth on her, and never shuts it. Told the whole bloody town about the upcoming listing, just in case anyone knew of a buyer. Smart cookie, that one.”
Olivia laughed at Gramps’ sarcasm.
“Are you really giving me the cabin?” Sawyer asked. “After everything I told you? Aren’t you upset?”
“Heavens no. We knew something was fishy right from the start and had you two figured out long ago.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” he asked, his voice filled with disbelief and curiosity.
“What fun would there be in that?” Gran laughed.
“She added a nice bit of eye candy, I think they say, to our family dinners. And I like that she kept you on your toes. I wasn’t ready to see her leave,” Gramps added.
Her cheeks burned. She’d never been called eye candy by an eighty-year-old man before.
“Oh stop,” Gran said, swatting at Gramps. “We had the deed made up shortly after we figured you out. We knew that if you, the king of bachelors, were willing to even pretend to have a girlfriend to get the cabin, that it must be pretty special to you. Later, when we found out about the soon-to-be listing in the area, we knew we’d made the right choice.”
“You could have told us sooner and saved us all the heartache,” Tyler said, whining.
He didn’t even understand the meaning of the word. Heartache had nothing to do with losing a possession like the cabin. Real heartache came from losing the only person who mattered in your world, losing the only man you ever loved.
Back when Sam had left her, practically at the altar, she’d thought he was the love of her life. But now, knowing Sawyer, being with him this entire time, seeing what he would sacrifice to tell the truth about their relationship, she knew what real, whole-hearted love was. What she’d felt for Sam all those years ago was like puppy love, a crush. What she felt for Sawyer was all encompassing, can’t-deny-it, chick flick style love.
“And spoil the big announcement today?” Gran said. “No. We wanted to wait and see how this all played out. Not exactly how we hoped, I’m afraid.”
Gran’s gaze fell to Olivia.
She swallowed around the lump of emotion in her throat. She’d barely kept it together this long. No way could she hold it in under Gran’s watchful gaze.
“Congratulations. I’m really happy for you, but I have to go.” She spun on her heel to walk away, but he grabbed her arm, stopping her.
“No. I’m not letting you run away again. Not until you hear what I have to say.”
“I’ve heard it all. I listened to your voicemails. I know how you feel. Or at least how you feel right now.”
“You listened to them and still didn’t contact me? Why?”
“Because it doesn’t change the fact that we want different things in life. I want stability. Roots. A place to call my own and someone to share it with me. Someone who plans to stick around forever, not just for now.”
She bit her lower lip hard, trying desperately to stave off the sadness threatening to cripple her if she gave into it. She’d been strong this long; she could be strong a little longer.
“What if I told you I wanted forever, too?” Sawyer asked.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“Don’t, Sawyer. Don’t do this to me,” Olivia said, her voice on the edge of breaking.
Sliding his hand down her arm, he took her hand in his, gripping it tightly so she wouldn’t slip away. He couldn’t live through that again. He hoped she saw the truth of his feelings in his eyes, heard it in his words. “I mean it. The day you walked into my apartment was the day my life changed. The day you walked out of my office and didn’t look back was the day my world ended.”
She sucked in a hitched breath and he wanted more than anything to pull her into his arms and kiss her. But he wouldn’t. Not yet.
“I didn’t realize the mess I’d made of my life until you showed me how good really living could be. Right from the start, you cared about me, my life, my future, and not because you had to as part of the deal, but because you wanted to.”
“I shouldn’t have tried to change you. You’re perfect the way you are,” she said softly.
“You did change me. For the better.”
Sawyer looked around at all the people watching their moment and knew his time was running out. Taking a deep breath, he geared up for his final push, the one that would hopefully land him the ultimate prize—Olivia.
“The day you left, I’d planned on taking you out and asking you to be my girlfriend for real. I wasn’t sure what the future would bring, but I knew I wanted you in it. I had a position made for you at Sterling. A permanent one. It’s still there if you want it. I wasn’t sure how I’d sort out the whole traveling thing with work, but I knew I’d do whatever it took to find a way to keep you and get that deal, too. I’d fly back and forth across the ocean every other weekend if I had to.”
“You don’t have to change who you are for me, and you don’t have to sign on for a future you don’t really want. The baby and I will be fine on our own.”
“What’s that about a baby?” Gran asked, sitting forward in her seat.
Olivia placed her hand on her stomach. “I’m pregnant.”
“That’s wonderful, dear!” Gran cheered.
“And I’ll raise the baby on my own. All I ever wanted was someone to share my life with, have a family with, and now I have the family even if I don’t have the husband to go along w
ith it.”
“There’s no doubt in my mind you would do a damn good job as a single mother,” said Sawyer, “but that’s not what I want for you or for our child. Who I am now and what I want in the future are different because of having you in my life, and I’m okay with that. Fuck, I’m great with that.”
“Language, son,” Gramps piped up.
“Shush up,” Gran said, swatting him.
“Olivia, I love you. I’ll love you today and tomorrow and forever if you’ll let me. I’ll give up the Marcus project if that’s what it takes to win you back. You are more important to me than any other person in this whole world.”
Tears flowed freely down her cheeks and he hoped with every fiber in his being that they were tears of happiness, because if they weren’t, he’d made a huge ass of himself in front of his entire family for nothing.
“I love you, too, Sawyer,” she whispered.
“What did you say, dear? We’re eighty. You’re gonna have to speak louder than that. Someone get her the mic.” Gramps waved at the nearest person.
Olivia laughed then spoke louder. “I love him too.”
The grin spreading across Sawyer’s face was so wide and proud that it almost hurt. She loved him, and he couldn’t be happier. Well, he could be.
He dropped to his knee, not letting go of her hand. “I don’t have a ring.”
“Sawyer, come here!” Gran called.
“Not now, Gran. I’m kind in the middle of something,” he called back, rolling his eyes but trying not to break the magic of the moment. “And I know this is unexpected since we literally just made up. But—”
“Come here, Sawyer. Come.” Gran waved her arms like she was signaling a 747 into a coat closet.
“Are you for real? No, Gran. Please stop interrupting me. As I was saying, I would be so honored if you would agree to spend forever with me…and my apparently crazy-assed family.”
The Hookup Hoax (Entangled Lovestruck) Page 19