"Partly. She did like the games, but she liked the attention more. She didn't get much of it in high school. Even I found it was flattering, and some of the guys were kind of cute, if guys are your type." She paused. "Hang on, need to make this turn."
We had reached the northern end of Lake Mille Lacs, driving up the west side of the lake. She pulled into the left turn lane, waited for an opening, and made the turn. "How about a quick stop?" she suggested.
"Sure."
We pulled into a full service station, and she drove to the pumps. "We don't need gas, but I may as well fill up anyway." We climbed out. She began pumping the gas then switched to cleaning the windshield. I watched and talked to her.
Right then I decided something: I liked her. Not wanting to have sex with her sort of like, but just liked her. And admired her. She was dead sexy, I had to admit, especially the way she was dressed, but she wasn't paying attention to anyone else while she was taking care of her car. I wasn't sure what that meant, but it gave me something to think about. Plus she didn't act like she needed someone to take care of her. I liked that about her. She exuded an aura of quiet competence, I guess.
She paid for the gas at the pump but then headed towards the store, giving me a playful little bump as she stepped past me. "Salt," she said. "And maybe some empty calories. Calories don't count this weekend."
"Yeah, right," I told her. "You don't keep that figure with that attitude."
"I'm going for a ten mile run in the morning," she said. "Will you join me?"
"Ten miles? Seriously?" She nodded. "You know, I'd like to go with you, but I don't know if I can keep up, and ten miles might be more than I would like."
We stepped into the convenience store. We each found some salt, some empty calories, and things to drink. When we got to the register, Jessica took everything I was holding and paid for it.
"I should have paid for that," I told her when we stepped outside. "You're paying for everything else."
"I promised you a no-expenses weekend," she said, smiling at me.
"But-"
"I'm happy you're here, Jade." She put an arm around me and hugged me, shoulder to shoulder. Then she held my car door for me again. Most of the guys I dated didn't open my car door, but she did. It was nice.
She got us on the road and said, "About two more hours. I have picnic style food in the cooler behind you. Hungry?"
"What was all the salt and sugar for then?"
"Mostly I wanted a little longer break to stretch. But don't worry, I'll go through all the salty treats I bought and half of yours."
"Have you just admitted your weakness? I was starting to think you were Super Woman."
"Oh, I have more weaknesses than that," she said. "Hang on, another turn." It was a right turn. We were heading north again. "Okay, can you reach the food? It's all on top. Finger food."
"Sure," I said. I raided the cooler. She had sandwiches in one bag, cut up fresh vegetables in the second, and grapes in the third.
"I hope you're not a vegetarian," she said. "Susan is definitely a carnivore, so I made sandwiches accordingly. Two of the sandwiches are turkey, two are roast beef."
"Carnivore here," I told her. "What sandwich do you want?"
"One of either," she said. "And if you can open the bags and put them where I can reach them, that would be great."
We ate quietly for several minutes. "Sorry," she said. "I kind of wolfed the sandwich."
"Did you want another?"
"No, thank you." She glanced at me. "About the morning. We can walk if you don't want to run. Or I can go alone. Across the road from the cabin is a state park. There is a bunch of hiking trails. It's just through the trees and pretty flat, but it's still pretty. I like bringing my camera."
"I'd like that," I told her. "Mosquitoes?"
"Probably. I brought spray. I'm the only one who gets to bite you this weekend."
I laughed. "I don't think you'll be biting me, either."
"Ah, you have left a window of hope wide open for me. I will bask in the knowledge you didn't flat out say 'no'." Jessica glanced over and looked me up and down pointedly before returning her attention to the road.
"You wouldn't want to bite me," I replied. "I taste like straight girl."
She laughed and glanced over at me. "You're okay. For a straight girl."
I watched the trees slide past our window. It was a beautiful evening, and traffic was now much lighter, the road narrower, the trees closer to the road, a mix of oak, birch and swatches of pine trees. It was gorgeous, and riding along in Jessica's car left me feeling relaxed.
"Jessica?"
"Yes, Jade?"
"How did you know you were gay?"
"Is that what you were thinking about for the last fifteen minutes?"
"No, I was thinking how beautiful the drive is, and how relaxed I am starting to feel, and then suddenly I wanted to talk to you again."
"So you asked the hardest question you could ask." But she was smiling. "For me, it was a process. I dated guys in high school, and I had fun with some of them, but when I got to college, and they wanted to step up the physical intimacy, I found I just wasn't interested. So I continued to date, but casually." She paused, remembering. "Then, during my junior year over winter break, I was at a New Year's Eve party. And you know how it's traditional to kiss right at midnight?"
"You kissed a girl?"
"Yeah."
"And that's how you knew?"
"No, but the seed was planted. It was a really nice kiss. She was a little drunk. Not a lot drunk, just a little, enough to have lowered inhibitions, and she decided to really make it a nice kiss, not just the little peck I was expecting. She wrapped her arms around my neck, and she was able to raise my blood pressure by several notches before she let me go."
"Wow."
"That's what I said," Jessica said, laughing.
"Was she gay?"
"No. She called me the next day, completely embarrassed, and we both got teased about it for a long time afterwards, but I realized I had enjoyed kissing her more than I had ever enjoyed kissing any guys. By senior year I was actively trying to find women to date, although I was pretty stupid about it."
"Oh?"
"I didn't do anything stupid, stupid. No bad choices. I was just bad at it. I didn't know how to find them. I could find the militant lesbians, you know, the ones who hate men, but I found I didn't like them. I had horrible gaydar; I still do, actually. So dating was a frustrating experience for me."
"And now?"
"It's still a frustrating experience."
"Picky?"
"Yes. But not the way you might think. I appreciate a woman who looks nice. I think you're totally hot." She glanced at me as if she were judging my reaction. "Does it bother you that I said that?"
I laughed. "No. It's flattering. Thank you."
"But what's important to me is that she has a brain and she is kind. I can find women who are hot. I can find women with brains. And I can find women who are kind. But trying to get two out of three can be difficult unless I really compromise on the third. Is that shallow?"
"It depends on whether being totally hot is the most important part," I told her. "That would be shallow. You know you are basically describing yourself, though."
She looked over at me. "Do you mean that?"
"Sure. You have an amazing body."
"I work hard for it."
"It shows. And you're brilliant at work. And from what I've seen, you're kind. That girl dumped you on the phone today right before you were going to pick her up for a weekend you'd put real effort into, and you weren't a bitch to her. I might have been."
"Thank you." She was quiet for a while. "She also needs to be open-minded and a little adventurous. Not reckless, but someone who, for instance, would go hiking in the woods with me."
"So if I were gay, I'd be your dream girl?" I bit my lower lip and dipped my chin so I was looking through my eyelashes at her.
Jessica laughed. "P
robably. Depends upon whether you enjoyed what I would want to do to you in bed."
I laughed nervously. "Would I?"
"If you were gay you might." She smiled. "Heck, even if you weren't gay, you might enjoy it."
Curiosity set in. I wondered what two women did together. "Are you going to tell me more than that?"
She thought about it. "No. It would give me too many ideas, and then I'll spend the entire weekend thinking about what could be rather than enjoying what is."
With my curiosity unsated, I was disappointed, but I wasn't going to pry. "Well then," I said, picking up my diet soda. "Here's to what is."
We clinked soda cans and drank.
"What about you?" Jessica asked. "What's your story, Jade? I've been trying to guess your ethnic background, but I've been failing."
"I'm a mix," I admitted. "My maternal grandmother was from India. I also have some Filipino in me and even a little Italian. I look more like my grandmother than anyone else." I tugged on my straight black hair.
"I love your mocha complexion, and you display a striking mix," Jessica said with an appreciative tone. "And the rest of your story?"
"Well, I was born 29 years ago in a small town in Iowa," I said. "My parents believe I am saving myself for marriage and are deeply worried about the corrupting influence of the big city."
She laughed. "Do they have cause to worry?"
"Some," I told her. "But I'm not stupid and rarely make stupid, dangerous mistakes."
"So your dating life?"
"I have one. It's okay." I paused. "I like doing outdoorsy stuff, but I haven't found a guy who doesn't get competitive about it. Or at least they're always either not interested at all or else so much better, bigger and faster than I am, that I feel going with me is settling. I've never had a guy offer to go for a hike instead of a run, and with this tiny stature and short legs, I can't keep up with any guys who want to go running. I either end up running alone or else feel guilty I am holding him back. You get what I mean?"
"I think so." She glanced over at me. "I like your stature."
I laughed. "This is so funny, but you're more of a gentleman to me than the guys I've dated."
She smiled at me. "Why is it funny?"
I thought about it. "You know? I don't know. I guess because you're not a gentleman." I stressed the last syllable.
"Do you like the way I treat you?"
"Yes, I do. It's weird having a woman hold a car door for me, but I like it."
She nodded once. "So, tell me about the last guy you dated that you liked and didn't break up with because he was a dork."
I laughed. "Let me think." I thought about my last boyfriend. He was definitely a dork. What guy would want to spend more time with his games than with me? And the one before that had wandering eyes. I'm not necessarily any more jealous than the next woman, but I didn't trust he'd stay faithful. I didn't want to spend my entire life wondering when he was going to cheat or whether he already had. The one before him had been kind of dumb. Big and cute, but dumb, and he'd only been fun for a while. Last I had heard, he was dating a bimbo, and the two of them were very happy together.
My smile fell while I thought about it.
"Jessica," I said quietly, afraid I was about to sound horribly pathetic. "Maybe someone in college. I don't know."
"Oh honey," she said. "I'm sorry."
Neither of us said anything for a while, then I decided that was enough of that mood. "I don't care," I said. "Okay, I care, but this weekend, I'm here with you, and you promised to flirt with me."
"You know," she said. "Now that I have fed you, I expect you to sleep with me."
I laughed. "I brought my granny jammies."
"Oh hell," she said. "I didn't. I packed expecting to be with Susan." She started to blush. "I am so not letting you see what else I brought."
"Jessica! Did you bring scandalous sex toys?"
"Yes." Her blush deepened.
"Seriously?"
She nodded.
My curiosity came back in full strength. "Anything good?"
"They're all good, Jade, in the right hands."
"Tell me."
"No way," she said. "I've blushed enough for now. And then I would think about using them. On you." She glanced at my legs before snapping her eyes back to stare out the windshield. "I can borrow one of Jon's shirts to sleep in. Or I suppose one of us can take the sofa, but it's not going to be as comfortable."
Maybe I should have been intimidated by the attention, but intense curiosity mixed with my usual amount of playfulness kept me going. "Tell me about one of your toys and I'll agree to share the bed with you."
She glanced over at me.
"What?" I asked. "You said you wanted me to flirt. I'm flirting."
"You're playing with fire."
"How many did you bring?"
"An exact count depends on whether you count the silk scarves individually."
I wondered how far I could tease her. I decided a lot further than I had so far. "What would you do with those? To me. If I let you."
She looked at me again. "Jade," she begged. "Please. If you want to tease, find something else. I was looking forward to a pretty decadent weekend, and I'm fucking horny. I don't need to get hornier."
"Really?"
"Really."
"I'm sorry."
"It's okay, I'm not mad. But if you bring this up again, I am going to consider it permission to show you what I would do with them." She opened her car window, making it difficult to talk for a few minutes and, I presume, to cool off a little. She rolled the window back up after a few miles.
"We should talk about the proposal," she said.
I shoved my curiosity down. I had enjoyed the banter. "All right," I said, capitulating. I gave her a status update.
"Let's work late," she suggested. "We can make a fire and sit in front of it with our laptops. We can see how much we can get done. It would be nice if we could play for the rest of the weekend."
"All right. I can give you what I have so far and tell you what I'm still working on."
* * *
"We're here," she said, pulling up to the back of a cute little cabin. It was going to be dark soon, and I was happy we had arrived during the daylight.
Jessica climbed out of the car and popped the trunk. She pulled the cooler out of the back seat and rolled it on its wheels to the back door of the cabin. I got both our suitcases from the trunk, and by the time I reached the door, she had it unlocked and was holding the screen door for me. I stepped past her, and she followed me into the kitchen.
"Bathroom," she said, pointing to one door. "Our bedroom." She pointed. "Keep that door closed; it's Marcy's and Jon's bedroom. The living room is through there. If you can put our suit cases in the bedroom and fetch the rest of the groceries from the car, I'll make sure the water is turned on."
I nodded and slipped into the bedroom.
The cabin was cute. It wasn't very big, but it was attractive. It was very rustic and very clean. In our bedroom were a queen size bed and a large dresser as well as a closet. I set both suitcases down then gave the bed a try. It felt comfortable.
It took several trips, but I got both our laptops and the remaining groceries inside. I took a deep breath and could taste the knotty pine. I explored the cabin. In the living room I found a wall of photos, clarn taken over many years. Most of them looked old, and I didn't recognize anyone, but they all showed people clearly enjoying themselves at the cabin.
The cabin had an old-fashioned root cellar door like the type you see in some movies with an exterior door in the ground. The door was flipped open, and on my final trip through, I heard some swearing. I dropped the groceries off and went back outside to see what was going on.
"Everything okay?" I hollered down.
"Just trying to start the pump," Jessica hollered back. "I think I've got it now." A minute later she appeared at the bottom of the stairs and started up. "I think that did it. The hot water
heater is on and the pump is pumping. We won't have any hot water for a little while, although it might be warm just from the pilot light."
We stepped inside, and she tested the kitchen sink. Water was flowing.
"Marcy has complicated directions written on everything down there or I never would have figured it out."
I grinned. "Kind of like a guy trying to figure out everything 'down there', huh?"
She looked at me for a moment then began laughing. "Not that I would know," she said. "I'll take your word for it. I never had any trouble figuring that out, myself. Maybe if the guys aren't giving you what you need, you should try something different. You know the definition of insanity: trying the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
"Does that line work for you?"
"I'll let you know at the end of the weekend," she said, leering at me. We both broke into giggles.
We put the groceries away. I found a squeeze bottle of chocolate and a fresh container of honey. I held them up while looking at her. She took them away from me and put them in the cupboard. "No comment," she said.
"That's kind of a cliché," I told her.
"There's ice cream," she said. "I told you. Calories don't count at the cabin."
"And the honey?"
"For your tea."
"Uh huh," I said, nodding at her.
"You can put the chocolate in your coffee, too."
"Eww." I made a face.
"It's like a mocha."
"Right." My face was still wearing an expression of distaste. "I'll try one after you do."
"Deal."
I looked at her. "You are so full of shit."
"I don't know what you're talking about. What would you use chocolate syrup for?"
"You know exactly what it's for," I told her.
She offered an innocent look. "Tell me."
"I thought you didn't want me to tease you."
"I love being teased," she said. "I tease back. Are you teasing me? I thought we were talking about chocolate sauce."
Her attempts to look innocent were somewhat damaged by the outfit she was wearing; it was hard to think of her as at remotely innocent.
"We were talking about what to do with chocolate sauce."
"Right."
"You can, you know-"
Northern Proposals Page 2