by M. Malone
“And I’ll open it for you when we come back out, too.”
“There’s no rule that says you have to open it all the time,” Katie teased. She clutched her bag against her chest, trying to act like she was used to handsome men attending her like she was a princess.
“Well, somebody might want to tell my father that because he’d knock me upside the head if he found out that I didn’t know how to treat a lady.”
Katie smiled all through being seated at a quiet table, all the way through the perky waitress reciting the day’s specials and into their appetizer. They were halfway through chicken nachos that were making Katie wish she’d ordered several plates, chatting about random things before Bennett looked at her suddenly.
“How am I doing so far?”
“Great. I’m having so much fun.”
His shoulders lowered. “Oh good. It just occurred to me that I was having a good time. Usually when that happens it means I’ve gone off on some tangent talking about something that bores everyone around me.”
Katie thought back to all the things they’d talked about. He’d told her a few random facts about where most restaurants sourced their jalapenos from but that could hardly be considered a tangent, right? They were in fact eating jalapenos, so that was actually relevant.
“You’re not boring. Besides, what’s wrong with being passionate about things? I think you’ve been too hard on yourself. You just have a lot of interests.”
Bennett took another bite of nachos and then fixed her with an intense look. “I want to ask you something but I’m pretty sure I’m going to do it wrong. And I really don’t want to hurt your feelings.”
Katie winked at him. “Go ahead. I promise not to take offense. Even if it’s pretty bad.”
He looked down at the plate between them, dragging a chip through the cheese and salsa left on the plate. “It’s about your ex-husband.”
“Oh. I think I already know what you want to ask. Why did I stay with him so long?”
“Yeah. It doesn't sound like he was worthy of you.”
“That’s nice of you to say. Hmm, that’s a difficult question though. I honestly don’t know why I stayed as long as I did.”
Bennett peered at her worriedly. “Sorry, I probably shouldn’t have brought it up.”
“No, it’s okay. We’re friends, right? Friends talk about real things. I’ve definitely vented for hours about this to Ridley.”
Katie sighed. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to tell him about her marriage. It was natural that he’d be curious. It just wasn’t so easy to admit to someone who was hyper focused and accomplished like Bennett that she’d floated through life for years without much ambition or direction of her own.
“When I was in school, I was just an average student. I didn’t excel in any one subject so most of my teachers didn’t pay too much attention to me. No one really encouraged me to go on to higher education. My sister and brother were the smart ones. I was the nice girl. I had lots of friends.”
“I bet you did. You attract people like a flower attracts bees. If I didn’t know better I’d think you were releasing some kind of special pheromone.”
Katie laughed. “Like a secret weapon to snare people into my web. I like that. Anyway, after high school I was working in a clothing boutique and Don came in. He was on vacation with some friends. He was really flirty and complimentary at first. It felt good to get so much attention from a handsome, sophisticated American guy. My mom really liked him. She couldn’t believe that I caught a doctor.”
Bennett made a face. “Caught? It’s too bad you didn’t throw him back.”
She smiled at that. “I’m glad I didn’t. He’s the real loser here. I have amazing kids, the best friends and neighbors you can ask for and now I have a great, new job where I’m learning tons. I’m happy to be exactly where I am.”
Bennett picked up another chip. “I’m glad you’re here, too.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
♥
Bennett took a sip of his water, watching Katie surreptitiously from behind the glass. They’d had a great conversation so far, after his stupid question about her ex. But her answer had made him feel better. She didn’t seem to be carrying a torch for the guy which was good and she hadn’t seemed like spending time with him was a hardship.
Now he just had to remember all the advice that Nick had given him. Bennett cut into his steak and tried to think of something he could say that would show her more of who he was. If he was supposed to show her that he was more than just a scientist, he was going to have to do better than small talk about their families and the restaurant.
“I can hear the gears moving in your mind.” Katie smiled gently.
Bennett paused mid-chew. “Sorry. I guess that was kind of an awkward pause.”
“Silence can be nice sometimes, too. I’m always a little suspicious of people who have to fill every moment with activity, you know? It’s exhausting trying to keep up with that.”
Katie twirled her pasta around her fork. She’d confessed that pasta was one of her weaknesses. Especially pasta with seafood in it. Another thing he filed in his mental notes about her.
“I’m used to being the quiet one in a crowd of noise,” Bennett said. “Growing up with three younger brothers who never stopped moving taught me to find an oasis in the middle of pandemonium. Plus, my Aunt Maria and her two kids lived with us for a while also when I was really young. My cousins Langston and Laura are like additional siblings. It was a constant party.”
Katie leaned forward. “Was it crazy? You seem like such a solitary person. I can’t imagine you growing up in a big family.”
“It was difficult at times. With so many people around, there’s always someone asking you for something or making noise. Finding time alone was almost impossible. Luckily we have so much land that we were all outside a lot. I’ll have to take you to some of my favorite spots one day.”
“I would love that.” Katie placed her fork by her plate and sat back with a satisfied sigh. “That was so good. I’m sure it’s all going to my hips but that’s okay. It was worth it.”
Bennett took his last bite of his own food. His brother had recommended the restaurant and he’d described it as upscale without being pretentious. Sweeties was known for great food and a romantic atmosphere but of course it all came with an extremely high price tag. However, it was definitely worth the outrageous price. Bennett was feeling languid and satisfied after such a good meal.
The waitress appeared then and set a dessert menu on the table between them. Bennett wondered if she thought they were a real couple. He considered the idea. What did other people see when they looked over at their table? He was so used to being considered strange or an outsider that he found he liked the idea of being a part of a couple with Katie. She made him feel like he belonged, exactly the way he was.
The waitress took their plates. “Dessert? We have a seasonal berry crumble that is absolutely delicious.”
Katie groaned. “Okay, you twisted my arm!” She made a face as the waitress disappeared. “I have no willpower at all.”
Bennett chuckled at her pained look. “So you have a weakness for sweets? I’ll have to remember that if I ever need to bribe you to do something.”
“You wouldn’t need to use pastry to get me to do something,” Katie mumbled under her breath.
Bennett almost choked on the sip of water he’d just taken. He grabbed his napkin and blotted his chin. Had he heard that correctly? But Katie was checking her phone and didn’t look as though she’d just said something inappropriate. His face heated. She might not have even realized she’d said it out loud.
He was trying to think of something to say but kept coming up blank. Should he pretend he hadn’t heard that? Or was she secretly hoping he had and waiting for him to acknowledge it? The secret language of flirting was such a mystery to him and he couldn’t exactly ask Katie to decode her own signals.
Bennett sighed. So much for b
eing himself. Maybe he could excuse himself and call Nick for more advice. But he quickly nixed that idea. His brother had already made assumptions about his relationship with Katie and he definitely didn’t want to embarrass her or reveal anything to people she had to socialize with regularly.
While he was contemplating this, Katie stood and put her napkin aside. “It’s been a while since I’ve been here. Aren’t the bathrooms down that hallway?” When Bennett nodded, she stood. “Great. Excuse me.”
He watched the sway of her hips as she walked away and then jerked his attention back to the table. The last thing he wanted was for her to turn around and see him ogling her. Although, considering what she’d said earlier, maybe she wouldn’t mind?
Nick’s words from earlier came back to him. Show her what’s under the lab coat. He hadn’t meant it in a dirty way but Bennett was starting to think that Katie wouldn’t have a problem with that plan.
♥
Katie washed her hands in the sink, wishing she could splash the cool water over her face without ruining her makeup.
What the hell is wrong with you?
She’d been lucky that Bennett hadn’t heard her dirty little comment earlier otherwise he’d probably have already asked for the check. Katie wasn’t sure what had gotten into her lately. She’d never been this unpredictable before but there was something about Bennett that made it easy to let her guard down. She found herself doing and saying things that she would normally filter out.
It was telling that she felt this comfortable around him. Don had always been so critical of everything that she’d tried to morph herself into what he’d wanted. Nothing she did ever seemed like enough so over the years she’d started to assume that everyone felt the way he did. That all her friends were just tolerating her or that they all secretly pitied her.
Living with someone who was emotionally abusive was such an insidious thing. It never seemed all that bad at first. She’d even considered it constructive criticism at first. Don had always made it sound like he just wanted her to improve herself and reach her highest potential. But after seeing other people’s relationships, she’d finally understood that the way he treated her wasn’t normal and it wasn’t healthy. There was nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself as long as you were doing it for the right reasons.
Not because you had someone else’s voice in your head telling you that you weren’t good enough.
Well no more. She’d finally found the strength to take control of her own life. Yes it was scary and maybe she wasn’t doing so well with her bills but at least she was doing it on her own. Katie was proud of herself for not giving up. She knew that if she really needed help, her siblings and her friends would help. But that wasn’t what she wanted. There was something really satisfying about working to fix her problems herself.
“Okay just go out there and have fun. Don’t take it so seriously.”
The woman at the next sink glanced over at her curiously. “Honey, are you on a date too?”
Katie dried her hands with a paper towel. “Yeah. Sorry about talking to myself. I’m just trying to remind myself not to get my hopes up.”
The other woman flipped her long blond hair over her shoulder. She held her hands over her stomach that was completely flat in her super tight dress. “I know what you mean. I met my guy on that new MeetNChill app. I’m not expecting much other than to get some. These men out here aren’t shit.” Then with a little wave she walked out of the bathroom.
“Well, okay then.” Katie chuckled all the way back to the table. At least she wasn’t the only one frustrated with the whole dating thing.
By the time she got there, her berry crumble was waiting for her. Katie slid into her seat and immediately picked up her fork. If she wasn’t “getting any” like her friend in the bathroom, at least she would have a great dessert. She’d take her pleasure where she could get it.
“I can’t believe you didn’t get anything,” she told Bennett. It made her feel a little weird to scarf down this whole berry pie while he just sat there.
“No, I rarely eat processed sugar. It’s easier to maintain my ideal muscle-to-fat ratio if I only eat sweets on special occasions.”
Katie gaped at him. “That sounds awful. I’m supposed to be teaching you to have fun so I cannot let you continue to live a pie-less existence. No one should only get to have sweets on holidays or whatever. Here.” She held out her fork.
Bennett leaned forward hesitantly but took the bite of pie she offered. His eyes closed as he chewed and swallowed.
“Damn that’s good.”
Katie grinned. “See? Don’t worry. I’m sure your perfect body fat percentage won’t be ruined because you had a bite of something yummy.”
His lips pulled up at the corners like he was fighting a smile. “I’ll be sure to think of you tomorrow when I’m running an extra mile on the treadmill.”
Katie’s stomach sank until she noticed his shoulders shaking with laughter. “Oh that was just mean. I actually felt bad for a second there. I was trying to share because I felt guilty enjoying this decadent dessert while you didn’t have anything.”
“Don’t feel guilty. I’m enjoying myself watching you.”
A warm rush of heat spread through her as she took another bite of pie. She wasn’t sure if Bennett really knew what he was doing when he said things like that. He probably thought it was just a nice thing to say and she didn’t want to be the brazen hussy who told him those things were sexually suggestive.
Or that her panties were uncomfortably damp every time he said something like that in his deep voice.
Katie managed to finish the rest of her dessert without embarrassing herself. In the car as Bennett drove her home, she mentally prepared herself for what would happen. She’d tell him that he did a great job and he’d probably give her a friendly hug to say good night.
Then she’d go upstairs, change into her nightgown and probably pull out the vibrator that she rarely even used anymore.
When they parked in her driveway, Katie realized she’d forgotten to leave the porch light on. Without it, the interior of the car was so dark that she could barely see anything more than Bennett’s shadow.
“Hold on. I’m coming around.”
The soft hush of his voice in the darkness caused goose bumps all over her. She waited patiently as he circled the car to open her door, and then walked her up to her porch. The lights she’d left on inside spilled through the front windows, casting a warm glow over them both.
Katie pulled out her keys and opened the door. Neither of them said anything. It suddenly struck her as funny. Normally this was when she’d be worried about whether the guy would kiss her or whether she wanted to rush in and slam the door in his face.
“This is usually make it or break it time,” she joked.
“What does that mean?”
“Oh, you know. It's the end of the night and usually you're a little tipsy at this point. So in high school you'd park the car somewhere and make out but as an adult, normally you just kiss goodnight before going inside.”
“Well, that doesn't sound that difficult.”
“Oh, you'd think it would be easy. Just lean in and smooch but you have to be smooth with it. You have to read the signals.”
Bennett sighed. “And you lost me again. Why can't the signal be when she says I'd really like it if you'd kiss me now? That would be so much easier.”
Katie's put her hand over her mouth to smother her laughter. Looking at things from his perspective, it was kind of odd that there were all these unspoken rules about something that should be instinctive but it was impossible to ignore that the rules existed, whether they were official or not. She remembered the first time Don had kissed her. It was a little bittersweet to remember it now, being so young and naive that she'd required so little to feel cherished. But all she'd wanted was to feel like someone saw her as special.
"The rules seem annoying, I know, but it all comes back to one thing.
You want to make sure that she's as into it as you are. And everyone isn't good at articulating what they're feeling. So you have to be able to read the signs. Body language."
"So, if I can learn to read body language then I'll know what to do?"
"Most of the time, yes."
"Well, if I could learn German then I should be able to learn this."
Katie laughed softly. "I still can’t believe you know all those languages. Is there anything you can’t do?"
His face fell. "I think we've established that there are quite a few things that I can't do."
In that moment, Katie suddenly understood what a monumental mistake she’d made. This whole thing was so wrong and she was swamped with shame for her part in it.
“I made a mistake agreeing to this.”
“To what? This date? Why?”
Bennett looked slightly hurt so she grabbed his hand before he could pull away.
“Because by agreeing to teach you, I'm participating in the idea that you need to change somehow. That you need to be different for a woman to like you. And that's not true. Bennett, you have everything you need already. You already have the most important thing. This, right here."
She pressed her hand into the center of his chest, relishing the strong, steady beat thumping beneath her palm.
"You have the biggest heart. The way you love your family and care about everyone around you, even your former employees, proves that. You don't need to change a thing. I think you're perfect the way you are."
Without her knowledge, her hand had roamed over his chest, feeling the hard muscles beneath.
“I think you’re perfect, too.” Bennett’s eyes were intense on hers before he looked down. He seemed mesmerized by the motion of her hand. Katie knew she should stop; she was practically pawing him but he felt so good.
“This is the most fun I’ve had in a really long time. I think you are beautiful and fun and I wake up every day excited now because I know you’ll be there.”