“Room for one more?”
Charlie nodded as Callum took a seat on the verge beside her. He placed an arm around her shoulder and pulled her body into his. She felt him start to rub her back reassuringly, and she smiled, remembering the way he had soothed the crying baby earlier.
There was no doubt in her mind that he would make a fantastic father one day. It was something she was most looking forward to – the start of their little family. It was a long way off for them at the moment, but she liked the idea that their time would eventually come.
“Did you see what happened?” she asked after a few minutes of silence between them.
“Yeah, I saw everything,” he replied, gently kissing the top of her hair and pulling her close.
Charlie nuzzled into the gap between his arm and chest, inhaling the fresh, yet rich smell of his usual aftershave. Fragranced with spiced vanilla and a hint of amber, his aroma was so intoxicating she could be high from it in minutes.
“You know if I could have stopped it, I would have right?” he said brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear.
A painful lump formed in Charlie’s throat, choking her words as she tried to speak. “W-W-Why can’t she just be happy for me? She doesn’t like my job and the fact that I’m not engaged or married yet. She is so old fashioned it drives me crazy.”
She felt Callum’s body stiffen beneath her. Lifting herself from his grasp she turned to look at him cautiously. “You okay?”
“What? Me? Of course, I’m fine.” He answered her quickly as he ran a hand through his hair. “Ummmm, do you want to go back inside now?” Getting to his feet before she could reply, he held out his hands to pull her upright.
Charlie eyed him suspiciously. He was looking very flushed all of a sudden, a thin sheen of sweat glistening on his brow. “Are you sure you’re alright?” she asked worriedly as he pulled on the rounded neck of his T-Shirt to fan himself.
“I’ve just gone really warm, that’s all,” he waved her off. “Let’s go inside where the air conditioning is.”
She followed obediently back through the fire escape and into the ruckus of the party. Her eyes darted wildly around the room searching out for her mother. Luckily, she couldn’t see her.
“Auntieeee Charlieeeee!”
She dropped to her knees at the excitable voice of her little nephew. Opening her arms wide, she enveloped Ben into a hug and kissed his cheek sloppily. “Happy Birthday, Ben,” she said.
“Happy Birthday, Trigger,” Callum said crouching down beside them and ruffling Ben’s hair. “How old are you today, hey?”
“Fiveee,” Ben said with a beaming smile.
She loved Callum’s nickname for her nephew. It had been decided one afternoon in her mother’s back garden after Ben had consumed way too much fizzy pop than his body could handle. Going from zero to a hundred in a matter of minutes, Callum had dubbed the crazy little dude with his new name from the rapid explosion of energy.
“You’re becoming a big boy now,” Callum replied, high fiving Ben.
Out of the corner of her eye, Charlie spotted Emma and her husband, Harrison, lurking nearby. Letting go of her hold on Ben, she whispered gently into the little boy’s ear. “You go and play with your friends, little man. Auntie Charlie is going to go and speak to your Mummy and Daddy.”
“Okay,” he smiled, running off towards the soft play jungle.
She watched her sister tap her husband’s chest before they started to saunter over towards them. Straightening up, Charlie gritted her teeth in preparation and linked her arm through Callum’s for safety in numbers.
“Harrison. Emma.” Callum broke the ice first by shaking each of their hands. “Thank you for inviting me along to Ben’s birthday party.”
Charlie studied the couple stood before them. Harrison still looked his usual uptight self in a long sleeved jumper and corduroy trousers, whereas her sister looked as immaculate as ever. Her auburn coloured hair had been restyled into a short bob, and she wore a simple lilac summer dress with strappy sandals.
Charlie lifted her eyes back up her sister’s body again, but this time she lingered around her stomach. She was looking a lot rounder than normal. Charlie stared transfixed trying to work out if she was pregnant round or whether she had just put on some extra weight. Hoping for the latter, she lifted her eyes to her sister’s face.
“I’m pregnant,” Emma confirmed bluntly.
“Oh...” Charlie felt her insides suddenly drop. This was the last thing she needed to happen right now. This would just be more ammunition for her mother to use to bring her down. She could just see it now. Her mother continuously telling her how perfect her sister was that she was pregnant with her second grandchild in five years.
“Congratulations, guys,” Callum said on Charlie’s behalf.
“Yeah, congratulations,” she mumbled.
Harrison pulled Emma closer to his body and rested his hand protectively over her swollen stomach. “Don’t worry, Charlie. I’m sure you’ll eventually grow up one day and settle down.” She couldn’t miss the venom dripping off of his voice. “You any closer to deciding if she’s what you want yet?” he rudely shot in Callum’s direction.
Jerking his head to the side, Callum tightened his eyes on Harrison and looked at him with a frightful glare. “And what fucking business is our relationship to you?” he snarled through gritted teeth.
Harrison laughed cockily, obviously relishing that he had hit a nerve. “You’re right, Ellis. It isn’t any of our business. I suppose we should be grateful for this one over here,” he said, gesturing towards Charlie. “It’s fantastic being the golden couple in this family. We can do no wrong in my mother-in-law’s eyes because Miss Disappointment manages to do enough for all of us.”
“Say one more word about my girlfriend and you’ll be fed through a tube for the rest of your life,” Callum threatened, stepping forward with clenched fists.
“Callum,” Charlie warned, pulling him backwards.
Placing a hand in the middle of his chest, she turned towards her sister. “You are grown adults, yet you act like small children. I did not come here to be abused and neither did my boyfriend,” she said with disgust.
“Come on, Baby,” Callum beckoned as he slid an arm around her waist and guided her towards the door. “Let’s get out of here.”
Eleven
Sitting at the breakfast counter in the kitchen, Charlie tapped her bare feet against the stainless steel legs of the bar stool. Clutching her steaming mug of tea, she looked mindlessly out of the floor length windows at the peaceful and sleeping city of Manchester.
She knew that it was way too early to be awake on a Sunday, but she just couldn’t sleep. Her head was continuously spinning following the events from Ben’s birthday party yesterday afternoon. Callum had tried to take her mind off things in only a way that he could, but even that wasn’t enough to remove the harsh comments that had now permanently stamped themselves into her brain.
After a restless night of tossing and turning, she finally had enough around six in the morning and decided that her first cup of tea was needed. Thankfully they were approaching summer, so the mornings were a lot lighter now, meaning that she didn’t need to fuss about switching on any lights and potentially waking Callum up.
Lifting the mug to her lips, Charlie took a small sip, enjoying the feel of the warm tea as it instantly comforted her. Placing her mug back onto the counter, she started tracing patterns across the smooth granite surface with her finger.
Her head started to slowly swim with thoughts again. Specifically, she thought about the comments made by Harrison. What if he was right and Callum hadn’t decided yet whether she would play apart in his future? What if he was having second thoughts on their relationship?
Her chest ached painfully at the thought, knowing it was a certain possibility at this stage.
Turning the clock back in her head, Charlie started to re-evaluate the past instances where she had mentione
d their future in conversation. She recalled the way Callum reacted on each of those occasions. The way his body would freeze within seconds and the sudden rush of heat would flood his skin. She visualised his expression in her mind and winced. The look of sheer panic always seemed to strain across his beautifully sculpted face.
Charlie’s mouth fell open and she shook her head in startling disbelief.
She was right.
After everything they had been through and shared in the past fifteen months, he was still on the fence about their relationship. The shocking realisation felt like a punching blow to Charlie’s gut. Everything around her stopped for a few moments as she stared helplessly out of the window. Tears pricked at her swollen eyes and gradually rolled down her cheeks to splash onto the countertop.
Had it all been a lie? Was he just playing her all this time?
As the tears continued to silently fall, Charlie remembered each time he had managed to playfully brush her family’s intrusive questions away. Citing that their love was strong and built to last, he always artfully dodged the topic of their future and the next step in life.
It was the first time she had actually taken the time to compile all of the facts together. Not expecting to feel as broken as she did right now, she cursed herself for her own curious and inquisitive mind. She hadn’t realised that putting the pieces of the puzzle together would leave her shocked and numb by what was revealed.
“Charlie?”
Charlie quickly sat up straight and used her hands to wipe the tears from her face before Callum approached.
“What are you doing up so early, Baby? I rolled over and your side of the bed was empty. I got worried,” he said, placing a comforting hand on her back.
Charlie flinched, knocking her mug across the counter. It skidded across the smooth surface before falling off the edge with a smash. Keeping her head down, she jumped off of her stool and tried to clear up the broken shards that had scattered across the floor.
“Charlie...”
She remained quiet as she picked up the broken remnants of her mug. She couldn’t even look at Callum right now, let alone speak to him. She was already struggling to fight back the tears as best as she could, and she knew that one look at his face would push her over the edge that she was clinging desperately to.
Standing up straight with her back to Callum, Charlie crossed the kitchen and deposited the broken shards into the dustbin. Walking over to the sink, she turned on the cold tap to wash her hands, hoping that the coldness would shake away the negative feelings she currently had.
“Charlie...” Callum said closely from behind.
She didn’t need to turn around to know that he was standing right behind her. She could feel his strong presence and the sound of his heavy breathing.
He reached out and placed both hands on her pyjama covered hips.
Charlie flinched from his touch again and squeezed her eyes shut as tears slowly trickled down her face.
Gripping her hips tightly once again, Callum spun her body around to face him. “Charlie, what the heck is going on?” he asked, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear.
She tried to shimmy from his grasp as her tears started to fall faster.
She wouldn’t look at him.
She couldn’t.
“Charlie, open your fucking eyes,” Callum commanded as he shook her slightly.
She shook her head.
“I don’t know what’s going on here,” he said. “But you won’t even let me touch you. Please, Baby. Tell me what’s going on.” He pleaded with her desperately as he took in her distraught appearance.
“I worked it out,” Charlie croaked, opening her swollen, tear streaked eyes to look straight at him.
“Worked what out, Baby?” he asked, his voice shaking with anticipation.
The way his eyes suddenly widened nervously was enough for the dam behind Charlie’s eyes to finally break and flood. She finally let go of all the emotions she had built and buried over the past few months. Everything came to the surface in one heart stopping moment.
Sobbing hysterically, Charlie started to rain fists onto Callum’s chest. “I worked it out!” She continued to cry. “I worked it out, you bastard!”
Blocking her flying fists, Callum gripped hold of both of her hands. “What, Charlie? What have you worked out? Tell me?” he shouted over the sound of her cries.
“I know I’m not what you want!” she screeched at him, her voice hoarse. “I’ll never be good enough for you, will I?”
Sinking to her knees, Charlie buried her head in her hands and cried.
Callum sank to his knees in front of her and placed two fingers under her chin. “Baby,” he whispered, lifting her face to look at him.
She opened her eyes just enough to see his distraught expression. His lower lip was trembling and his eyes had glazed over with tears.
“Where has this suddenly come from, Charlie? Is it about yesterday and what that prick said?” Callum asked, running his thumbs under her eyes to clear her tears.
She replied with a small nod.
Cupping her face with both hands, Callum pressed his forehead against hers. “I want you to know that you mean more to me than anything on this earth. I would walk to hell and back for you a million times at least.” He paused briefly and took a large breath. “I know we haven’t really discussed what is going to happen in the future, but I want you to know now that you are going to be a part of it. Just trust me when I tell you that there is a plan for us and one day things will work out how you want. You just need to be patient because neither you nor I are ready for that next step yet. Do you understand where I’m coming from?”
Charlie understood clearly, but she wasn’t sure if it was the answer she wanted. Was he proposing they just continued as normal until the time came that he thought them both ready for the next phase in life?
She shook her head at him.
“You don’t get it do you?” she said through soft sobs. “This isn’t just about getting married, Callum. I don’t just want you to put a ring on my finger to make it all better. That is not what I am getting at.”
“Then what do you want, Charlie?” Callum snapped, raising his hands in question. “I don’t know what else you want me to fucking say. I’ve just laid it all for you on a fucking platter and you’re still not happy. Tell me what you want from me because I don’t know what else I’m supposed to do.”
She opened her mouth to retaliate, but was suddenly silenced by the loud chimes sounding from Callum’s pyjama bottoms.
Standing up, Callum plucked his Blackberry from his pocket and looked at the screen.
Charlie’s hands were shaking with adrenaline and anger as she also got to her feet. “Would you look at that,” she said bitterly. “Couldn’t have come at a more perfect time, hey? You gonna answer it and then fuck off for four hours?” she asked him, her tone laced with spite and fury.
She saw him about to reply and she lifted her hand to silence him. “No, Callum. You wanted to know what I was getting at and here it is,” she said, her voice wavering.
Taking a deep breath, Charlie finally let her true feelings out. “I am only ever yours when it suits you. I feel like you don’t give a shit about me when you spend all day in your office on web chats and phone calls. You expect me to act like everything is fine and that it is ok for you to barely spend any time with me. What are we supposed to do, Callum? Am I supposed to carry on like this for the rest of my life? I’m lucky if I hear from you at all during the week, and then at the weekends you spend your time with me answering phone calls and now disappearing for hours. I am not a part-time girlfriend just here to fill a void for you. I’m here because I love you and I want you to love me back... properly.”
Her voice cracked on her final sentence and Charlie clasped her hand to her mouth choking back a sob. Needing to get out of the kitchen and away from him, she fled around the far side of the island and headed upstairs for the master en-suite.
“Charlie!” She heard Callum’s footsteps rushing up the stairs behind her.
“Just leave me alone,” she cried, slamming and locking the bathroom door behind her. She turned around to rest her weight against the wood before sliding into a crumpled pile on the floor.
“Baby, open up,” Callum shouted, smacking his fist repeatedly against the door. “Please... Just let me hold you.”
Charlie wrapped her arms around her legs and rested her head on top of her knees. She couldn’t believe the instant relief she was feeling after finally letting everything out. She was sure her words had hurt Callum, which was something she was going to have to face at some point today.
“What the hell did you do to her, Callum?” Charlie heard Amelia shriek from down the corridor.
She wasn’t wearing a watch, but she guessed she had been in the bathroom for more than an hour. Callum had tried tirelessly to get her to open the door, but she wouldn’t budge. She wasn’t ready to have that conversation with him yet about what happened in the kitchen earlier.
Clearly he had reached desperation by calling in one of her best friends as reinforcements. But little did he know that not even Amelia was going to be able to get her out of the bathroom she had confined herself in. She didn’t want to speak to anyone. All she wanted was some privacy to collect her thoughts for a little while.
A soft knock on the door caught her attention.
“Sweetie, it’s Mia,” she said softly. “I know you are feeling like shit at the moment, but we are all worried about you and want to make sure you’re ok. Can you let me in, please?”
Charlie stood from her spot beside the door and walked over to the vanity. She gasped at the sight of her face in the mirror. Although she had stopped crying a while ago, her eyes were still very puffy and swollen.
Broken Truth Page 8