Heart of a Lion (Awakening Pride Book 11)

by Lacey Thor

  “Don’t,” he warned, but she pressed her fingers to his lips.

  “Let me finish,” she chided. “But I’m not giving you up. I need you, Mitch. I’m only calm when you’re near.”

  “I’m not going anywhere,” he promised, taking Emery from her and brushing his finger over the baby’s soft cheek.

  Emery blinked up at him, gave a cooing sound then dropped his eyes closed again, settling in as if he knew he was safe. It made Mitch’s heart beat faster. He wouldn’t give Emery a reason to ever feel any differently. He was falling as fast for Quinn’s son as he had for her. The baby boy continued to react to the sound of Mitch’s voice. He’d wave a hand or clasp Mitch’s finger or watch him with those big eyes of his, and Mitch fell a little deeper every time.

  He pushed open the door and watched her face as she took in the crib that had been set up in the corner along with a changing table stocked with supplies.

  “How did you manage all this?”

  She wandered over and ran her fingers over the bedding, gave a chuckle at the mobile that held a range of big cats, then paused as she discovered the clothes. She glanced over, eyes luminescent with emotion. He wanted to take all the credit but he wasn’t the one who’d done it.

  “Tony.”

  The man might have pushed her for whatever reason, but he’d also accepted her as part of their group. The crib and supplies were his way of apologizing and showing her that she was welcome. Mitch gathered by the soft look on her face that she realized that, as well.

  “He’s a complicated man, isn’t he?”

  “Mmm,” Mitch said noncommittally as he eased Emery from his arms into the crib. The baby settled in easily, doing that little mew with his lips before relaxing. “He’s beautiful.”

  “He’s…everything,” she tacked on after a long pause. “Lander would have loved him.”

  “I’m sure he does,” Mitch agreed. “He’s probably watching over you both.”

  She leaned into him, lying her head against his shoulder.

  “I like the thought of that. Him watching over us.”

  “What did Lander say when you found out you were pregnant?”

  She closed her eyes, pushed away from him, and crossed the room. “Lander never knew about Emery.”

  “What?” Mitch turned his back to the crib and stared at Quinn.

  “I completely broke down after Lander’s death. Talbot could have killed me easily then. I wouldn’t have cared.”

  It broke his heart to hear her say that.

  “Instead, I woke up splayed on a table with Talbot messing around inside my abdomen. He told me he’d mixed Lander’s sperm with one of my ova, and it had taken. That I was pregnant. That if I was a good girl, I could keep a piece of my friend with me forever. I didn’t know if he was telling the truth or not. As I felt Emery begin to grow, I knew it didn’t matter if it was my egg and Lander’s sperm or not. He was my baby, and I’d do anything to protect him.”

  The sick bastard! Christ, the things he’d said and done to mess with Quinn’s head. It was a miracle she was still as strong as she was.

  “After that, he would remind me anytime I balked that my baby’s life was in his hands.” She shrugged, turning away again.

  “What did he make you do?” Mitch asked then added to his question before she could speak. “And don’t say whatever he wanted. We know that. No one will ever blame you for what you did. I promise you that.”

  She shook her hands, paced a few steps forward then back then walked to the corner, turned and slid down the wall, wrapping her arms around her knees and hugging them close to her chest. She was in the dark and shadows, hiding. Christ, he hated the way she tried to hide herself in the room. He wasn’t sure she even realized that she did it. It spoke a lot about what she’d learned under Talbot’s constant thumb.

  “I wasn’t allowed clothes. I was a thing, not a person, and things don’t require clothing.”

  The shadows in her eyes had questions building on his tongue, but he bit them back. Not wanting to make her feel any more uncomfortable.

  “I’d grown used to it by the time Emery was growing inside me. I was… still grieving at first. My mind wrapped up in Lander and Emery wasn’t…” She paused, waving her hand in front of her face.

  “I understand.”

  He did. It must have been hard for her in the aftermath of her best friend’s death. To be told she had a piece of him wouldn’t outweigh the grief of losing the man himself. Especially since the baby had probably been more of an abstract concept then. Plus, Talbot was into head games. Quinn probably understood that better than any of them.

  “I didn’t believe Emery existed until Talbot let me hear his heartbeat. My face must have showed my joy. Talbot knew he had me right back under his thumb then.”

  And the son had replaced his father as the person used to keep Quinn in place and doing as she was told. If Mitch hadn’t already hated Talbot, this conversation would have sealed it.

  “Sometimes he’d have me watch while they tortured someone. If I broke and begged them to stop, it only got worse. If I sat silent, trying to hold my emotions in, he’d say they wouldn’t stop until I said the word. It didn’t matter. Either way, he only stopped when he wanted to. Then there were the times when he’d make me watch the games.”

  He wasn’t sure he wanted her to continue but knew she needed to. She needed to purge everything she’d endured. It was eating her up. The guilt. The self-blame. She deserved none of it.

  “Those fucking games were the worst. The first time he pulled me in, there were two women. Naked like me, but there was rage in their eyes. He asked me which one I’d choose. I didn’t know what he meant to do so I kept my mouth shut. The next morning I woke up tied to his table. He told me he’d taken the baby.”

  He couldn’t stay away from her. He moved to sit beside her, tugging her into his body and offering her as much comfort as she’d accept.

  “He let me cry for hours before he told me he’d lied. Then he warned me the next time he asked me a question, I better answer it or I would lose my child. Lander’s child.” He eyelids fluttered shut as tears escaped to roll down her cheeks. “So I did. I chose, knowing I held their lives in my hands. I sacrificed every single one of them for my son.”

  At some point, they’d have to get her to accept she’d never had any control over what choice Talbot made. It had been another way for him to control her, to screw with her mind. The bastard had taken pleasure in making her think the lives he’d decided to take where at her whim when she’d never had an ounce of control. God, Mitch wanted to rip off Talbot’s head, to gut him and splay his body as a warning to any others who might try to hurt Quinn.

  He scooped her up, moving her onto his lap and holding her as she cried. Then she surprised him.

  “I never had any chance of saving any of them,” she whispered. “No matter what Talbot told me, they were always going to die.”

  “Yes.”

  He hated agreeing. Hated seeing the acceptance and devastation in her gaze.

  “I want to see Talbot.” She glanced up at him, gauging his reaction. “I have to. We both know he’s waiting for me to go to him.”

  “That doesn’t mean we should parade you down there. We have no idea what his agenda is.”

  “It doesn’t matter. He knows where the female bear shifters are. He knows if the shifter Blane gave him is a member of the pride. Knows if that shifter is still alive. And he knows why I’m having the issues I’m having.”

  “That doesn’t mean he’ll tell us anything,” Mitch argued, but he knew she wouldn’t let it go.

  “We have to try anyway. I have to try. If I can figure out what buttons to push, I think he’ll let something slip. I think he won’t be unable to stop himself from gloating. Especially if he sees the changes in me. I’m his greatest experiment.”

  “You’re not a fucking experiment,” Mitch corrected.

  “I am to him,” Quinn acknowledged. �
�That’s what matters. It’s time I see if I can turn the tables and get inside his head.”

  Mitch knew she was right, but it didn’t make it any easier to accept.

  “And if you can’t?” Mitch asked.

  “Then it’s past time Dr. Talbot paid for his sins.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Any softness Quinn had felt toward Tony after seeing all the baby gear he’d purchased for her and Emery was gone after five minutes in his presence. The man was a cocky, arrogant prick. The only thing keeping her from taking off his head was the presence of Mitch, Jess, and Abby.

  “Enough!” She slammed her hand on the table, interrupting his bullshit explanation to Jess’ latest question. “I have no doubt you’d be happy to talk to Jess if I wasn’t here. Why would you do that to me? Why keep things from me that I need to know? That I have a right to know!”

  “Don’t even think it,” he snarled.

  She couldn’t blame him. Her expression probably conveyed exactly what she was thinking. Which was that he was similar to his uncle who’d liked to keep her in the dark, as well. Though Talbot had used it to manipulate her, and Tony only seemed to piss her off.

  “Then stop making me think it,” she snapped back. “Gideon already told me the ovary that was removed wasn’t mine. I know Talbot screwed with my insides. I know the things happening to me aren’t normal. I need to know if there’s more around the corner for me or if this is as bad as it’s going to get. Don’t leave me in the dark. I can’t be there anymore. I refuse to stay there.”

  Mitch stepped up behind her, wrapping her up in his embrace and tugging her back to rest against his broad chest. She loved the man. Couldn’t deny her emotions for him anymore. He’d started winning her over from the first moment they’d met and continued every moment of every day since. He gave her what she needed even when she wanted more. He gave her what her body and heart could handle. He loved her, in a thousand ways both big and small. They hadn’t made love. Not yet. But he was as deep inside her as he would ever be. He filled her heart and soul. Making love would happen when the time was right, but there was no rush. No pressure to seal the deal in order to cement their relationship. It was already rock solid.

  “While Mr. Broody is pretending to decide what to share—”

  “Jess.” Tony’s voice carried a warning that the other woman ignored.

  “I’ve made a booster shot for you based off the bloodwork that’s been taken while you were here. Have to admit, it’s very interesting.”

  “Don’t start that again,” Quinn warned, not wanting another day of hearing Jess say the word interesting over and over again.

  Jess grinned shamelessly then sobered up as she continued talking.

  “It’s an appropriate word when it comes to you. I do have a question, though. Were you given an infusion of Lander’s blood at all while you were with Talbot?”

  “I don’t know,” Quinn admitted. “Talbot never said one way or the other. With the sheer number of things he did to me, times I awoke to find myself tied down and him and others working on me… Anything could and did happen.”

  “For what it’s worth, I don’t believe they did, which is why Talbot was telling you he was ready to terminate the pregnancy before you left. I think he knew your body wouldn’t last much longer. That he’d lose you both. Which makes me question what the true purpose of the experiment was,” Abby admitted.

  “She’s not a fucking experiment!” Mitch retorted.

  “She was to him,” Jess countered. “That’s what matters for this conversation. Bear with us. The changes he made inside you prior to implanting a shifter embryo in your womb make me believe he was testing a theory.”

  “You think he was trying to create a viable womb to produce shifter babies without needing transfusions or using an actual shifter female whose body might reject a foreign embryo.” Tony looked equal parts appalled and interested.

  “Wait!” Quinn pounced on Tony’s comment. “Are you really saying Emery isn’t mine? That there was some truth to the ugly accusations you spewed earlier?”

  “No,” Abby answered. “Emery is your biological child. His father is a lion shifter, though without access to Lander’s DNA, we can’t confirm his paternity.”

  And it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility for Talbot to tell her it was Lander’s then use another shifter’s sperm to inseminate her egg. It would be one more mindfuck in the scheme of all that he’d done to her so far. Still, it was something to have confirmation that Emery was hers. Not that it would have mattered to her one way or the other if his DNA proclaimed him not to be her biological child. She’d carried him, loved him, and done everything in her power to protect him. That wouldn’t change, no matter what.

  “Why did Tony state otherwise?” Quinn demanded.

  “I didn’t state anything,” Tony corrected. “I suggested. At the time, I wasn’t aware of how much your blood had changed while you were held.”

  “How much did it change?” Mitch asked.

  “Enough that she needs transfusions even though she’s no longer pregnant,” Jess stated. “Enough that I’ve created a booster for her in hopes that it will keep her at a steady level.”

  “What does that mean?” Quinn had no idea how to interpret what Jess was saying.

  “Think of it as your body having a deficiency. One that, if left unchecked, can cause major fluctuations that lead to fainting, seizures, and a variety of other issues. By introducing a steady dose of the drug needed for stabilization, we can stop those fluctuations,” Abby explained.

  “My needed drug is lion’s blood? How is that a thing?”

  Tony sighed and ran his hand through is hair before tilting his head back and pinching his nose.

  “Spit it out,” Mitch ordered.

  “Because on the inside, you’re more shifter than human now.”

  Tony’s words brought silence to the room as they all seemed to take them in. She noted neither Abby or Jess showed any surprise, but she felt the shock in Mitch that echoed her own.

  “What did he do?” Quinn finally asked, filling the silence.

  “As you’re fond of saying, anything he wanted,” Tony replied. “You had both ovaries replaced with that of a shifter female. You also have her liver and one of her kidneys. He replaced your adrenal glands with hers.”

  Both ovaries? That explained his question of whether Emery was hers or not. Her ovaries? A kidney and her liver? Adrenal glands? What the hell! Then the way Tony stared at her alerted her to more. He was holding something back.

  “What else?” Her question was soft, almost tentative as fear ate at her. What else had Talbot done to her?

  Tony shared a veiled look with both Jess and Abby, and she knew he was struggling with what to say or maybe how to say it. So she turned to Abby and Jess also.

  “Tell me.”

  “You’ve had a heart transplant,” Abby offered, keeping her voice as quiet as Quinn’s.

  “I…” She shook her head, pushing away from Mitch and pacing across the room. Wrapping her arms around herself, she held tight, as if her strength could hold her together.

  “Is it hers also?”

  “Yes,” Jess offered.

  Quinn felt something inside her stir again, and it almost took her to her knees. Had the woman been awake and aware of what was happening when they’d harvested her organs and given them to Quinn? Probably. Talbot took pleasure in the awareness of his victims.

  “I have no idea who she was.”

  The confession tore her open. She had parts of another woman inside her and had no idea who the other woman even had been.

  “She was a lion shifter,” Tony told her.

  “A lion shifter,” Quinn repeated.

  It made sense. Lander had been a lion. Her son was a lion. Of course, Talbot had wanted to make her womb as compatible as possible to carry her son. It also made things click in place.

  “It’s her organs that require the lion’s blood.�
�

  “Those are your organs now,” Tony corrected. “But yes. We believe that’s why you need the infusions of lion’s blood. It could also be why he created a second cord leading from the developing baby back to you. You fed the baby and in turn, the baby fed you back enough to keep you going.”

  “Then you gave me the transfusions.”

  God, they’d given her both alpha blood as well as primal blood.

  “It appears the mix of Tah and Daniel’s blood kickstarted something inside of you. The claws, the glow of your eyes, the growls. Then I gave you a dose of primal liger blood, as well,” Jess admitted.

  “Are you trying to tell me that Talbot has made me a shifter?” Quinn couldn’t keep the incredulity from her voice.

  “No.” Abby sliced her hand through the air. “I refuse to believe Talbot has that capability.”

  “But he started something,” Jess added.

  “Fuck me.” Tony shook his head, angry color suffusing his cheeks.

  “I started it. You finished it,” Mitch said as if he were repeating something he’d heard.

  Tony nodded. “Those were Talbot’s words. He said that to me when I threatened to cut you open. He told me it was too late. He’d started it, and we’d finished it.”

  Quinn ignored the threat Talbot had responded to. At this point, she knew Tony would say and do whatever it took to get what he wanted. As much as he rubbed her the wrong way at times, she wouldn’t fault him.

  “We’d like to do further testing…”

  Jess trailed off as Quinn shook her head.

  “No. No more testing. We’ve had enough.”

  She understood the correctness of that statement when the thing inside her seemed to settle. She couldn’t say if it was a lion’s spirit or that of the shifter female herself. Maybe, it was a mix of both. It didn’t matter. All Quinn knew was that she could no longer deny it was a part of her. They, she corrected when she felt a surge of anger inside her. She wouldn’t rest until she discovered who the woman had been whose organs were now in Quinn’s body.

  “We’ll find out who she was,” Mitch whispered as he hugged her close again.