“I understand, but I didn’t think I’d have to give up my entire twenties for my career. I’m grateful for my fans and all the opportunities, but I’m thirty-one. Thirty-one, Wade. I don’t have the no-bottom-of-the-barrel energy like I once did. I miss my family. My ovaries throb when I’m near a baby. I don’t want to spend another Christmas eating a cold turkey sandwich in a motel room. I found three gray hairs yesterday. And I refuse to compete against Miss Trina-no-cellulite-Sway. I need to find myself again.”
His face softened some which was unusual for the brute of a man. “All musicians go through the same fluxes. You’re feeling the same thing that others have felt. It is possible to have a family and a career. Look at Trent Trevor and Shaina Gage. They’ve made it work.”
“Wade, don’t pretend you haven’t caught wind of Trent’s extracurricular activities. I’m not as forgiving as Shaina.”
“Marriage takes work.”
“Exactly. Do you realize how hard it is to juggle a full-time music career and a relationship? Tour after tour. Living out of a bag has caused bags under my eyes. No, you wouldn’t understand these issues, because you’ve never had a relationship.” Realizing how harsh her words sounded, she wanted to drag them back. “I’m sorry. That was unnecessary.”
“We’re all tired, Jessa.”
“Then be happy that I’m getting away. I’ll be back, recharged and ready to take on my commitments.” She kissed him on the cheek and he smiled. Maybe he was getting softer in his older age.
*****
“Come again?” Jace gritted his teeth.
Chase shrugged. “I offered her a complimentary stay here at Nirvana.”
Leaning against the fence, Jace smoothed his palm down his face. It had been a month since his dirt bath at the rodeo. He was still sore, but he was almost completely healed and was back working the land. However, hearing this news only hurt him worse, but not physically. “Now why in the hell would you go and do a thing like invite Jessa Garvey here?”
“Well, I don’t know, maybe because I walked into the medic room to find you laying on top of a strange woman man-handling her and she happened to be a popular country music singer. I thought you wouldn’t object to me cleaning up your mess.”
“Pfft. I wasn’t man-handling her. I didn’t even know what the hell I was doing. Whatever that shit pain killer was you gave me made me loopy and stupid. You were the one who talked me into riding at the rodeo. So technically speaking, this is your mess.”
“Wait…hold up there, sunshine. Didn’t you say that you kissed her behind the stables at the rodeo?”
“How did you find out?”
“I saw how close you two were behind the stables and you informed me of a lot of things on the ride back home after the rodeo. And by the way, it’s not a bald spot.” Chase rubbed the back of his head. “It’s a cowlick that won’t behave.”
“Whatever you say, buddy. Bald is beautiful.” Jace thumped him on the back.
He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. Facts are the same. I felt it was my obligation to make things right with Jessa, so to speak.”
“By asking Miss Priss of West Hamilton High to Nirvana? Damn. That just ain’t right.”
“No, by asking Jessa Garvey, country music star, to take a vacation here in paradise. I didn’t have a clue she rejected you back in school. I don’t know why you’ve got your panties all in a bunch, bro. Ask any man and he’ll tell you he was dissed once or twice, some even more, by a girl. She seemed nice enough, and she is a damn good singer. Kaycee is excited to have her here.”
Jace rolled his eyes. He remembered Jessa Garvey. Cheerleader. Prom Queen. Leader of the snob squad. Yeah, he didn’t like her much. Back in high school he’d been quite the shy boy and self-conscious about his weight. He wasn’t sure what he had been thinking when he asked her, the Jessa Garvey, to prom, but he’d gone against logic and did the crazy thing by inviting her. In front of her friends. Sheesh. His body tightened. She’d turned him down with the speed of a racehorse. No surprise. It didn’t even shock him that she and her friends had gotten a giggle out of his blunder. Yet, what he hadn’t expected was that the gaffe would be spread around the school by the end of the day. He’d become the laughingstock of West Hamilton until a month later when all the attention was on Bobbi Jo who’d gotten pregnant by the football captain.
When he’d kissed Jessa, he had no clue who she was, not the snob from school or the country music singer. She was just a beautiful woman with lovely lips made for kissing. In all truth, he hadn’t planned to kiss her when he found her in the partially hidden spot, but something drew him to her and he’d only used the squealing fans chasing him down as a ruse.
He’d only put the pieces together later when his pants were down and his dick was hard.
No one here at Nirvana knew that Jace had been a geek, probably still was, but Jessa’s rude rejection had spiraled him into change. He’d lost weight—a lot of weight. Visited a dermatologist who helped clear up his skin. He’d even started working out. By twelfth grade, he’d gone from dud to stud, but unfortunately, Jessa wasn’t around to see the transformation. Apparently, from what he’d heard, she was taken out of public school and homeschooled because she got a huge part in a musical in some big city. As far as he’d been concerned, “good riddance.”
And now he’d have to tolerate her here, at his place of employment, and more importantly, his haven. A place of peace. Not to mention, he’d groped her—accidently—but still, he’d crossed a line. In his right mind, he never would have done something so idiotic. So brazen. When Chase had told him, his balls had sunk to the size of walnuts, pretty much like they had back in school when she’d laughed at him.
Anger sliced through him, not as much because of the past, but the fact that she still made him feel things he didn’t wish to feel, not for her.
“You don’t know her like I do,” Jace muttered.
“Oh…I get it.” Chase pounded him on the back. “Loud and clear.”
“I don’t know what you think you get, man, but you’re wrong.”
“The only time a man wouldn’t want to spend some time with a beautiful talent like Jessa Garvey is because he wants to ask her out and he’s afraid of being rejected again. Admit it, buddy. It’s okay. All men are afraid.”
Jace removed his hat and hooked it on the fence post. The temperature was rising. “You’ve got this all wrong. The last thing I want is to take a stroll down memory lane with her, or anyone, but especially not Miss Priss. I hope you’re not going to ask me to entertain her while she’s here.” When Chase didn’t answer, Jace looked at his boss and groaned. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
“I wouldn’t joke about this. Anyway, you’re the only one available to take care of her.”
“Yeah, I bet I am.” He shook his head.
“Hey, this is your problem. Shoulda kept your hands to yourself.”
“What part of ‘loopy’ don’t you get? If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s yours. What the hell did you give me? Make-a-fool-of-yourself-serum?”
Chase held up his hands defensively. “I only handed you what the medic gave me. That’s all. It did help with the pain though.”
“A written apology should suffice. I’ll send her one today.”
“Too late. I gave her an open invitation. She called and will be coming this evening. Sorry, buddy, but you’re stuck with the beautiful Jessa. Tough job, but someone has to do it.”
“So you say.”
“Eight days, my friend. Only eight days. Just don’t go falling in love. I’ve lost enough of my hands to the love bite. It’s got to stop. Thank goodness I hired on another few hands.”
Jace laughed. “Now you’ve lost your mind, boss. First, she’d be the last woman I’d ever fall for. Second, she and I have nothing in common. I bet she likes her men rich and famous, you know, birds of a feather and all. And not to mention, I don’t think I’m quite ready for love.”
“Broken record. All the cow
boys have tried that excuse a time or two.”
“But I mean it.”
“Of course, you do.”
“Hey, just because you’re all cuddled up and cozy as a married man doesn’t mean it fits everyone.”
“You’re right. Just keep telling yourself that, bro.”
“I’m getting back to work.” Jace grabbed his hat and left Chase standing by the pen. He headed for the staff quarters while his thoughts stayed on Jessa. Maybe he should just admit to himself that he’d felt something outside of a stirring in his jeans. He’d heard his friends say that a man knows when he’s with a woman that could be dangerous…and she was beyond dangerous. He seemed to always make a fool of himself when she was near.
He’d put up a fence. He wasn’t normally a standoffish guy, but he’d have to draw a line that he couldn’t cross.
The staff building was empty, which he was glad. He was up for cleaning duty and he wanted to do it in peace. He finished sweeping just as he heard the door open and soft footsteps. He knew it was Moon before he even looked up. She was the female hand of Nirvana and Jace liked her, almost felt like a big brother to her and why he’d turned down her ‘come on’ in the barn a few days ago. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail and she had dark circles under her eyes.
“Oh, I didn’t know you were in here.” She tucked a tendril of her dark hair behind her ear.
“Are you finished with the horses?” He scooped the dust into the pan and emptied it into the trash, then placed the broom back in the closet.
Moon made her way across the clean floor and leaned against the counter, running her tongue across her bottom lip. Her cheeks were flushed. “Just finished. I’m hot.” She ran her fingers down her neck, pausing at the dip in her throat, then she quickly dropped her hand.
“Can I get you a water?”
She blinked. “No, I’m fine.” She cleared her throat and threaded her fingers through her hair.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, why wouldn’t I be?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I was asking if we are okay.”
“We’re fine.” Her smile was sincere. “How are your ribs? Have you asked Doc Parker to take a look?” Her cheeks turned red.
“Nothing to see. They’re a little sore, but nothing that a shower won’t handle.”
She stared and opened her mouth to say something, but thought better and shook her head. “Okay. Well, I’m off. See you later.”
Once she was gone, he finished the last bit of cleaning and headed toward staff row to his cabin. He didn’t look forward to welcoming Miss Priss to the ranch. He also didn’t welcome the image of them kissing.
Later, after finishing a quick, cold shower, Jace threw on fresh Wranglers, towel-dried his hair until his ribs ached, and scowled at himself in the mirror. “Couldn’t keep your fucking hands to yourself, could you? Had to get doped up on pain meds and make a fool of yourself. Now you’re roped into being a tour guide for a woman who thinks she’s better than you. Good one, cowboy.” He dropped his towel onto the hook and left the bathroom. Spread out on the bed was the new button down with the tags still on it. He wasn’t sure why he bothered dressing his best. Miss Priss had turned him down years ago, but he refused to let her believe for a second that he still cared.
He didn’t.
Not one iota.
No way.
And he wasn’t going to kiss her again. Or fondle her on purpose. And not accidently.
The crush he’d had on her at fifteen had fizzled long ago. All boys crushed on the pretty cheerleader with the wide blue eyes and big, flirty smile. Although he’d been naïve and slow to mature, his body finally caught up to his head by seventeen and he’d turned out pretty good. He hadn’t dated a girl until he was a senior, but it didn’t turn into a second. He’d had his first real relationship at twenty, and after a year, he’d decided he didn’t want to be saddled down at a young age and Cindy didn’t seem to mind the break up. She married a doctor two months later, so Jace signed up for the rodeo and dedicated himself to riding, something he was good at.
He’d loved it. Hell, he ate, drank, and slept riding bulls until he’d been injured and couldn’t ride for a year. He’d quickly lost his place in the limelight and his career fizzled. After six years in the circuit, he’d taken an early retirement. That’s when he landed at Nirvana. He found the expectations were easy here. A man could work hard and enjoy nature.
His mind naturally flitted back to Jessa. She was the girl every guy dreamed about, had wet dreams about. Beautiful, smart, and talented. Her bubbly personality made her plenty of friends, but Jace knew better. He saw beneath her manipulation. He didn’t like snobs. Her parents had been loaded and owned a ranch. She’d acted like she was privileged.
Pfft.
Picking up the nice shirt, he gave it one last glance before tossing it over the back of the chair. He then grabbed a black T-shirt from the clothes he’d just washed and shook out the folds. It wasn’t dressing up like he normally did when guests arrived, but at least it smelled good and was clean. That was all he’d give to Miss Priss. If she didn’t like it, she could go back to where she came from because here at Nirvana, things were different. She’d see that no one was special or honored. Jetted back into reality was what she needed and he was just the man to do it.
CHAPTER FOUR
Jace paused to take a calming breath and caught a glance of his reflection in the window as he stepped into the administrative building. His hat was low on his forehead and he was clean shaven. The T-shirt seemed a little tight.
Sighing, he found Jennifer, the receptionist, sitting behind the counter tapping away at the computer. He cleared his throat.
She brought her chin up and waved him over, smiling as always. He liked her, but he wasn’t much in the mood for perky. “Hey there, handsome,” she teased. He knew her flirty character was directed toward everyone and she had the patience of a saint.
“Has my guest arrived?”
“She’s not here yet, Jace.”
“Bummer,” he drawled. Maybe if luck was on his side she wouldn’t show up after all.
“Isn’t this exciting? A country singer visiting Nirvana. We’ve had stars before, but none this big.” She spread her hands wide through the air and giggled. “I love her music. Wow, I love her! I have a girl crush.”
Keeping a straight face, he checked his attitude. “Yeah, exciting. We could switch places.”
“You’re funny. You know the guests come here to see you sexy cowboys as much as the scenery. Come on, tell me you don’t have a little itty-bitty crush too?”
“I don’t have a crush, not even a little itty-bitty one.” He wrinkled his nose. Why didn’t he believe his own words?
“Look, Jace.” She held up her left hand and wiggled her fourth finger adorned with a sparkling diamond. “I’m getting married. Me! Married! Sheesh!”
Her cheerfulness made his bad mood tenfold, but he was happy for her. “Hope he’s good man, Jen. You deserve the best.” And he meant it. The staff here were like family.
He didn’t like being pissed. Usually he could handle his mood better—usually he didn’t have a mood to handle. Things had seemed…well…different lately. Maybe it was because he’d been hurt at the rodeo. He couldn’t deny there was an odd sense of void in his life. His nights had gone all wonky too. If he had a nickel for every fantasy and dream he’d had of Jessa recently he’d have enough to buy his own ranch to sweat on.
But Nirvana wasn’t his and he had a job to do. He was expected to be courteous, helpful, and entertaining to all the guests, even the ones that spurred him. He’d have to sink deep and find his gentlemanly side. He’d never let Chase down, but Jace wouldn’t kiss anyone’s ass, even if it was heart-shaped and looked good enough to squeeze.
He took a seat on the chair near the fish tank and peered inside. He had no clue what kind they were, but one stared directly at him, blinking. Did he think Jace was the one living in a tan
k? Damn. Sometimes it felt that way.
Stretching his legs, the white noise of the filter lulled him and he tugged his hat over his eyes. Maybe he could get in a few winks…
The bell dinging above the door made him push his hat up so he could have the tiny pleasure of watching the newest guest stroll into the lobby rolling her suitcase in behind her. With a mixture of annoyance and humiliation, Jace sat up, his mouth watering. There it went. His body and logic right down the tubes.
She didn’t see him yet. Probably a good thing or she would have caught him adjusting his fly. He didn’t like feeling out of control.
Jessa greeted Jennifer and the two exchanged small talk. Mostly Jennifer who was gushing while Jessa autographed the other woman’s shirt. There was no sign of irritation or aggravation in Jessa’s gaze. He was staring hard enough that he would have noticed any changes in her expression. This was good, the distraction, to give him plenty of time to get his exasperation under control and check her out more while he was at it. He shouldn’t…he didn’t want to, but it happened. Damn, why did she have to be so gorgeous? He’d Googled a few recent pictures of her all dolled up with lots of makeup and fancy designer digs, but now she was more like a woman he’d expect to see on a ranch. She wore a loose fitting, off-the-shoulder, red blouse and dark skinny jeans that hugged her curves—curves she didn’t have back in school. A white Stetson topped her head and her long blonde hair fell in shiny, soft waves down her shoulders and back, the tresses almost reaching her tiny waist. Her cowgirl boots looked new. They’d be dusty soon enough. His gaze lingered in appreciation on her long legs. He didn’t like how his gut twisted in need and his zipper bulged again. Was he crazy?
That was the least of it.
His mind came alive, conjuring a vision of her wearing only the hat, boots, and a passionate expression. Sweat beaded on his forehead.
He was smiling until she turned and spotted him. Her curious gaze raked him from hat to boots before she finally stepped across the room. “I didn’t expect to see you so soon. You are here to greet me, right?”
Cowboys Forgive (Cowboys of Nirvana Book 8) Page 4