by R. J. Blain
Some things I couldn’t change, but I would change what I could and refuse to let go of what I needed in my life. Somewhere along the way, Anatoly had gone from a want to a need. It had taken me a long time to arrive to that conclusion, but I would try my best to keep my regrets from drowning me.
Regret and fear had already claimed too much from me.
My aunt offered one of her gentle smiles, a rare enough sight I focused entirely on her. “However satisfying his immediate death would have been, what you did is better. Go see if you can make that damned rock do something useful for a change. Let’s keep this from becoming even more of a tragedy if possible.”
If possible. So much of our lives had been based on those two, terrible words. Nodding, I braced myself for a fight with a damned rock. “Where’s Cleo?”
Todd got to his feet and headed for the hallway. “He’s with the women. I’ll take you. Gentry, keep that damned pest of a sister of yours out of trouble while I’m gone.”
That made my aunt scowled, but didn’t argue, warned me something was going on, and I’d have to start peeling answers out of people. First, I had more important things to attend to. As expected, Anatoly and Randal followed. The two big cats snapped their teeth at each other, and Anatoly won the dispute with a single shove of his far larger shoulder.
“You’re a jerk sometimes, Ana.”
My tiger huffed and nipped my hand.
I flicked his ear.
He took my entire hand in his mouth, applying enough pressure with his teeth I’d add a few more scars to my tally if I attempted to escape without his approval. Since I wouldn’t escape without extra bloodshed, I kept walking, treating my hand as an unconventional leash.
Todd wrinkled his nose. “I can’t believe you’re letting him get away with that.”
“Well, he won’t be going anywhere without me knowing about it this way. He’s my property, and I want to keep careful track of my property.”
“Technically, you’re his property, as he still hasn’t filed that damned form to dissolve the Blade Clan contract.”
“Is there a reason he should file that form? He’s not escaping me, Todd. I’ve decided I’m keeping this tiger. I look forward to thoroughly educating the clan about why they should take care with my tiger. I will repay every bruise they give him tenfold. It’ll be violent.”
“Sometimes, I have a very difficult time thinking you, who first came to my guild looking for work and meshing with the bodyguards, could be capable of that much violence. Then you surprise me. Again. Stop that. You’re bad for my peace of mind.”
I could believe that easily enough. “Unknowingly harboring an assassin tends to make a mess of things.”
Todd balled his hand into a fist and thumped the top of my head. “You’re as much of an idiot as Steph sometimes. I didn’t mean it that way. I mean you get into trouble, and as a result, my peace of mind vanishes for a while. That, plus I have to be on guard because there’s nothing as unpredictable as a tigress on the prowl. Considering you’re armed with the Hope Diamond and Sunder? Maybe we should put you in charge of the United States.”
“No,” my aunt snapped from the sitting room.
“What she said,” I added, cursing the grizzly’s sensitive hearing.
“What, Steph? Nobody would push her around with that damned stone around her neck. And stay in there, damn it! Don’t give Gentry reasons to want to beat me.”
“Then stop trying to give my niece my job. I do have a Vice President.”
She did? I stopped, turned, and returned to the sitting room. “Wait. You have a Vice President?”
“It’s traditional for the United States to have a Vice President, Jesse.” My aunt set aside her papers and arched a brow. “You’re a voter. You even voted in the last election, doing your legal duty. It’s right on the ballot who my Vice President is.”
Narrowing my eyes, I turned to Gentry. “Is there actually a Vice President, or did she eat the poor bastard?”
“You know her Vice President,” my uncle replied.
Damn. “Is her Vice President going to beat me for not knowing?”
“Not particularly. Since it’s too dangerous to go abroad, the Vice President is on call if the President requires help; mostly, the Vice President needs to stay up-to-date on current events, but generally? The Vice President is ready to take over if needed, and may someone have pity on the United States should my sister be removed from her position and the Vice President takes over.”
Like many others, the last time I’d voted, I’d checked off my aunt’s box because I disliked unnecessary change almost as much as the rest of the country. Somehow, we’d found something that generally worked without pissing off the extremists, and nobody—except Ferdinand and his goons—wanted to rock the boat.
“Okay. Who is the Vice President, then?”
“My wife,” Gentry admitted.
My mouth dropped open, and I floundered at the thought of the wolverine taking over the United States should something happen to my aunt. “That’s a disaster.”
“I know, right? It had been a hoot during their first campaign. Some people still call Steph President Adams because of that. It’s fun watching Steph get offended because she very much appreciates being a Miller. She thought she’d escape the burden of being an Adams.”
My aunt heaved a sigh. “I really thought you knew.”
“But Felicity doesn’t have Secret Service agents. Why doesn’t she if she’s the Vice President? Am I the only person who sees something wrong with this whole thing?”
Gentry grinned at my question. “She kept sending them back fully tenderized, and after a while of asking nicely to be left alone, the Secret Service decided to leave her alone. She usually has a pair shadowing her, but they’re very good at hiding in plain sight.”
I narrowed my eyes, debating how my aunt could possibly pull off having a detail for the wolverine. I could only think of one way for my aunt to pull it off: the Vice President was unaware she was being guarded. “Gentry has Secret Service agents masquerading as mercenaries, doesn’t he?”
“I knew you were a smart one. As a matter of fact, yes. I do. I’m a bad friend.”
Gentry rolled his eyes. “She also has Secret Service members in Todd’s guild, too. We work together to make sure people of interest are protected during general work. Also, Felicity is aware you’re up to no good as usual, but as she hasn’t caught you in the act, she’s ignoring it. She thinks you’re cute, Steph. Also, as fair warning, she might try to steal the little girl here for a while. The last I heard, it was ‘to teach that poor little girl what normality actually is.’ I got my ass handed to me when I laughed.”
“Felicity, your wife, and technically one of my aunts because of you, is the Vice President of my actual aunt? And nobody in this country saw anything weird about that?” I bowed my head and sighed. “I didn’t even look at the Vice President part, honestly. I am a bad voter.”
“I think most voters don’t care who the Vice President is, because I’m too damned mean and stubborn to die. Don’t beat yourself up over it, Jesse. Felicity is a great Vice President. If I need time off, she just takes over, browbeats anyone who gets in her way, and goes back to doing her own thing. And my bunny does a good job of taking care of the Clan Council matters.”
The bunny in question shrugged. “Americans don’t really care how the government is run as long as they feel their freedoms have been properly preserved, we don’t push our luck with taxes, and we keep things running the best we can all things considered. The various attacks on Charlotte haven’t even done any damage to the Presidency, despite the destruction. Hell, the locals love it. Destruction means rebuilding, and rebuilding means a boosted economy and job security. And since the attacks have been mitigated to government officials and members of the Secret Service, nobody cares. Personally, I think they should,” the First Gentleman complained. “Go see if you can take care of those puppies, Jesse. There’ll be time enoug
h for you to wrap your head around the idea that Gentry’s wife is the Vice President later.”
Right. I hesitated, afraid of my inability to do more than yell at the Starfall stones and hope one of them did something useful.
I hated feeling so damned useless.
Todd snagged me by the back of my neck and pushed me along. “This way, Jesse. I know how you can talk once you decide it’s time to start solving problems. You can figure out what’s going on after the women are looked at. I doubt that damned rock will make itself useful, but I’ve given up guessing what it will and won’t do. It seems pretty determined to stick near you, so maybe it’ll play nice.”
“Since when have any of the Starfall stones played nice?”
Anatoly lashed his tail and swatted Todd’s leg. The stallion raised a brow and engaged my tiger in a staring match. Randal pressed against my leg and purred.
Men.
“No posturing. I’m too damned tired for your posturing. Ana, behave.”
Anatoly flattened his ears and bared his teeth at me.
I sighed, and Todd hauled me down the hallway and up the stairs. “Henry? Cleo? I’ve brought the woman, and she’s got the rocks.”
Henry poked his head out of a nearby bedroom. “That’s got to hurt. Do you have to hold onto her neck, Todd? She hasn’t healed much yet. She’s been through enough.”
While Henry hated people in pain more than most mystics I knew, I raised my brows at his concern.
Before I had a chance to reply, Todd shoved me forward. “Take her. She’s fine. Anyway, what’s a little bloodshed between friends? Maybe if I help her bleed a little, the Hope Diamond will burst and make everyone around as healthy as I am. And Cleo can tell you just how healthy I am.”
One day, Todd would finally finish driving me insane, I’d go for the nearest weapon, and we’d have another fight. And because Todd was Todd, I’d probably end up face down in the sand with a busted shoulder. Again.
I had a bad habit of screwing up my shoulders, and I needed to do something about that.
“Freakishly so,” the donkey grumbled, emerging from the same bedroom Henry occupied. “Let her go so she can do whatever it is that stone might do. I’ve put the ladies together in here since there were two beds, and it’ll be easier to keep things quiet for them. The babies improved a little since we got the women fed and let them rest, but it’s going to be touchy, especially for the twins.”
“Why can’t I kill him again?” I complained, flexing my hands at the thought of how easy and relatively painless I’d made Ferdinand’s death. A moment of surprise, a few gurgles, and a few labored breaths hadn’t been enough suffering.
“Quick and merciful beats leaving him with an opportunity to surprise you,” the donkey countered. “Get your ass in there, Jesse. I don’t want to lose those puppies, and I don’t know if there’s anything else I can do for them.”
I heard the dismay in the donkey’s tone, and when I glanced at Henry, he shrugged.
Hope remained a cruel and terrible thing, capable of breaking even the strongest people in its fickle grasp. Hope could, in its stubborn way, lead to the greatest of triumphs. It could also lead to the bitterest defeats.
I tired of losing. Peeking into the room, I regarded Rachelle and one of the quieter woman, who hadn’t looked as far along as some of the others, who to all appearances, slept peacefully. “Are they drugged?”
“No,” Cleo replied. “I used a mystic trick to help make certain they slept. At this stage, there’s not many medications I’d be willing to try. Their babies are just too delicate. Even a mild cold could kill them.”
How could life be so fragile? Why? I doubted I’d ever understand the give and take of life and death. Stepping into the room, I went to Rachelle first, stabbing the nearest stool with my foot and dragging it close so I could sit. I placed the bag of Starfall stones onto my lap, opened it, and rummaged inside. Every weapon clan’s stone served a different purpose, but of them, I thought Steel Heart might be the best suited for what I needed.
Something about it brought people together in unexpected ways. I had a mother who apparently prowled for my father and a father who hadn’t picked another woman because my mother lived somewhere out there. Without the damned stone rolling around and doing what it wanted, I wouldn’t have met Anatoly as I had.
Unlike the Hope Diamond, which had more destructive tendencies, I viewed Steel Heart as a tool of creation.
Perhaps it could forge lives for the unborn children who fought to enter the world, despite the circumstances of their existence. I removed it from the pouch and placed it on Rachelle’s stomach, at a total loss of how to convince a rock to do what I needed.
Before I could open my mouth, the Hope Diamond glowed with a gentle orange light, which spread into the room. Every other time I’d witnessed it glow, it’d been blue and black, shedding a potent miasma warning those of its more treacherous nature. Much like cool, soothing water, the light flowed over my skin before bathing everyone in the room in its luminescence. It faded, and I shrugged, picked up Steel Heart, and returned it to the pouch with the other stones. “The Hope Diamond has opinions.”
Cleo rested his fingers against Rachelle’s throat. “Their vitals are already better. Not perfect, but better.”
“How much better?”
“I won’t be awake all night wondering if they’ll die. But we’ll have a lot of work ahead of us getting them fed and in the best shape possible for their birth. I’ll still stay up all night to keep an eye on them and do what I can to make sure Mom’s healthy for delivery, but I won’t be standing vigil waiting for them to die. Henry?”
He leaned over the other woman, brushing his fingers against her brow. “No change.”
I got up and went to her, taking Steel Heart out of the pouch and setting it on her chest. As it always did when I wanted to use it for some purpose, the stone glowed with a gentle light. “Now?”
The mystic frowned, and deep lines creased his brow. “Nothing.”
“Will the baby live through the night?” I whispered.
“It would take a miracle,” he admitted, shaking his head. “There’s only so much we can fix, Jesse. We can’t reverse long-term starvation. No fault of hers, no fault of any of them. They can’t eat food they don’t have, and none of them knew what they needed to eat. They told us what you’d done to try to help them. You’re the only reason those babies had a chance at all. They would have died earlier if they’d sustained the diet they were on.”
“But I did so little,” I protested.
“You did enough to give them a chance.”
It wasn’t enough. I hadn’t been able to cry since I’d arrived in Tennessee, not really, but frustration and the smothering helplessness of the situation conspired against me. After everything, I didn’t want any of the babies to die.
Nothing had been their fault.
I dumped out the entire bag of Starfall stones, wondering which one might be able to do the impossible. Could Sunder severe the chains of death and allow the baby to live? It hadn’t hurt me touching it. It seemed to dislike weapons altogether.
Maybe it wanted life to continue without the threat of weaponry to exist. Maybe we’d been wrong to fear the stone all along. Maybe it could do what Steel Heart hadn’t been able to do. I sniffed and set the dark stone next to Steel Heart.
“Sunder?” Todd asked. “Why did you pick that one?”
I swallowed in an effort to take control of my roiling emotions. “Maybe it hates weapons because it likes life. Maybe it wants to make miracles and stop ending lives.”
Maybe the Hope Diamond had performed a miracle for the twins and had left us to figure out how to help the other baby on our own. Maybe it believed we could make a miracle.
Maybe it didn’t understand what I needed it to do. I dumped the rest of the Starfall stones on the bed and reached for the clasp of the Hope Diamond. The clasp separated, and the heavy stone dropped away. Expecting the rock to ch
ange its mind, I swept Steel Heart out of the way and placed the jewel on the woman’s chest.
I held my breath, wondering what to do to convince the stone to help. There was no physical change in the stone or the woman, and I bit my lip hard enough it bled.
“Easy does it, Jesse,” Henry said, reaching over with his free hand to pat my arm. “It’s not a lot of a change, but things are already looking a little better.” The mystic narrowed his eyes, redirecting his attention to his patient. “Just enough of a difference to get the baby through the night. A chance is better than no chance at all—and that’s all the miracle I could ask for. We’ll have a busy night, Cleo, but I’d rather have that than the alternative.”
“Take your stones back, Jesse. I think they’ve done all they’re going to do, and this was what we were praying for—just a chance.”
I’d seen how hard both mystics would work with the prayer of a chance in the past. I wiped my eyes and nodded. “Shouldn’t you keep the Hope Diamond with you?”
“No. That stone wanted to be with you for a reason. Let’s not annoy it trying to separate you. It might zap us and pull a Steel Heart.”
The last thing we needed was the Hope Diamond wandering off. Heaving a sigh, I retrieved the necklace and clasped it around my throat. “You can now confirm I’m out of my right mind. I put it back on after I got it off.”
“Hey, think about it this way. The stone let you take it off. It’s not as heartless as some think. You’re a good woman, Jesse. Go back to your family and learn what you can. We’ll take care of the babies and make sure their mothers are ready for train travel. They’ll be best off in Charlotte. That way, we can recruit an entire army of mystics if needed, to make sure these babies make it into the world alive. We won’t give up on them,” Henry promised.
I nodded, and I retreated back to the sitting room so I could do my part to make sure their children had a world worth living in after they drew their first breath.
Chapter Sixteen