Meanwhile, Tamisa was struggling to wrap her head around the situation. She had just been put in charge of a team on her first ever mission, a team that even included her mentor, Villo. She was sure that it couldn’t be true. Perhaps it was some sort of test, to see her reaction. In that case, were the others aware of it?
“Dismissed,” said the commander. He quickly left the room, followed by his brother. Tamisa looked at Villo; he was smiling at her. “Congratulations,” he said with a wink. The bastard was definitely in on it.
“You asshole,” she whispered and stormed off to talk to the commander. She caught up with the brothers on the hallway. “Sir, with all due respect, what are you doing?”
Martin gave her a scolding look but the commander seemed like he truly had no idea what she was talking about.
“Ms. Faber?”
“Sir, I am on my first ever mission, I can’t be in command of a team!”
“I just put you in command.” His voice was calm, if somewhat patronizing.
“Sir, was this Villo’s idea?” She was irate at the thought that Villo might have tried to give her special treatment.
“You mean Mr. Kantil?” Only then did Tamisa realize that it had been a mistake to refer to her instructor as ‘Villo’ in front of the commander.
“Ms. Faber,” the commander said calmly, “you are under the false impression that Instructor Kantil is your friend. I assure you, he is not. If he comes off as overly friendly sometimes it is because that is his chosen teaching method. I wholeheartedly encourage it because it always produces positive results and helps us perform a better analysis of a cadet’s ability and psychology. But now you are no longer a cadet Ms. Faber, you are an active member of the Enforcement Unit. Mr. Kantil is now your colleague. He is no longer your instructor and least of all your friend.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Anything else?”
Martin Anderson gave her a look meant to discourage any further conversation, but Tamisa wasn’t done. “Sir, it just… it seems so unusual to put an Enforcer on her first mission in charge of a group of much more experienced soldiers. On top of that, I’m also the only woman, which -”
“Hold on! Right there, pause that thought!” Thomas Anderson raised one hand in the air as he spoke. “Are you trying to tell me that you feel you are not as competent as the men? Are you not equally prepared?”
What the hell is this? Tamisa thought. Was this entire thing orchestrated just to humiliate me? Bully me into admitting that I don’t think I’m as competent as the others? She decided to accept the challenge.
“I am just as prepared as any of the men sir, perhaps more.” So be it then, she thought, preparing for a fiery argument. The commander, however, didn’t seem as if he thought he was getting into an argument.
“All right,“ he said calmly, “then you admit you are just as prepared as they are. The only thing left is your lack of experience in combat situations. Now, with the sole exception of Mr. Muench, none of the others have ever had missions in the Djago Desert, a place of singular threat. That means you have the same level of experience in this situation as they do. For reasons I will not discuss with you, I feel Mr. Muench does not have the proper skills to lead the team in this particular mission. That means I was left to choose from the others. I chose you.”
“Yes sir,” she said, suddenly feeling very ashamed of herself. She had no right to question the commander’s motives, nor Villo’s professionalism. Anderson seemed to guess what she was thinking. “Don’t feel awkward, Ms. Faber,” he said. ”I think it is a good thing that you questioned your ability. It shows you have a very objective grasp of your situation and your limitations. But now the time for doubt is over. You need to start preparing for your first field command.”
“I’ll meet with you in a few hours to discuss the particularities of your command,” Martin added.
Tamisa’s mood swiftly improved. In fact, she felt great. A rush of pride overtook her at the realization that she will not only be the first active female enforcer in over twenty years, but also in command of a field unit on her very first mission. That was an incredible achievement. Now that her doubts were beginning to fade away, she was free to absorb everything that had just happened.
She hadn’t understood the commander’s reasoning at first. Now, she realized that she was in no position to question his judgment. He saw something in her that nobody else had ever seen. If he believed in her, then she had every reason to believe in herself. She also had every reason to celebrate. She realized that she had to go find Villo, to apologize for having been such a bitch. Then, they needed to celebrate together, preferably over many beers at one of the taverns outside the grounds of the academy.
●
When Villo opened the door he was wearing only his pants. His black t-shirt had been thrown carelessly on the floor. Tamisa had not spent a single moment worrying about whether or not it was proper for her to show up at his quarters like that. Since the trainers and cadets at the academy were almost exclusively male, there was really no reason to ever think about proper intergender etiquette. Tamisa tried to think of herself as one of ‘the guys’ anyway.
Villo smiled, just like he always did. “I’m sorry, the asshole is away at the moment. Can I take a message?”
Tamisa pouted, acting sad. Then, she looked into his eyes and just nonchalantly walked into the room. “I’m so terribly sorry,” she said, stressing every word for emphasis. She was smiling because she knew that he would understand. He always understood; he was Villo.
“I don’t get it, have I ever babied you?” he asked. “I mean, the first time we ever met, I kicked your ass and embarrassed you in front of the whole class.” Tamisa shook her head theatrically. “I think it’s so sad that you still find joy in that memory.”
“Apology accepted.”
“I was wondering, you know, if you want to go out and maybe celebrate or something. I mean, it’s kind of a big deal for me.”
“A big deal,” he said, nodding. “Yup, you’re the first soldier-girl we’ve had in twenty-four years and you’re put in command on your first ever mission, right after returning from a six-months punishment for pissing off the commander.” He laughed. “Yeah, I’d say that’s a big deal. We should do more than celebrate we should… we should…” he looked around the room searching for ideas, “I don’t know… have a pillow fight or something. Just something to reflect the grandeur of the whole thing.”
Tamisa started laughing with more joy than she had felt in years. Villo smiled for a moment, then became very serious. His voice softened as he looked into her eyes. “Tammy, I know your story. I know about your life on Aanadya, how much you’ve struggled to get to where you are now. You should be very proud. I know I am.”
They both grew silent. Tamisa kept waiting for him to say something and was very surprised when he didn’t. Instead, he leaned forward and kissed her, pulling her body tightly against his. For a second, surprise and panic almost made her fight back, but that second quickly passed and she threw herself into his passionate kiss with all the force of a swimmer abandoning her body to the water.
No way, she thought, as Villo gently picked her up and laid her on his bed. How can this be happening? For an instant, she wondered just how wrong this was, what the consequences would be. She dismissed those thoughts for a later date. For the first time in her life, she decided not to fight. She abandoned herself in the embrace and the love of her best friend.
Villo smiled and his smile was different. She remembered the commander’s words: ‘You are under the false impression that Instructor Kantil is your friend. I assure you, he is not’. Villo took off her clothes and threw them on the ground. As she came to the realization that this had probably never happened before in the history of the Enforcement Unit, the commander’s voice lingered on:
‘Mr Kantil is now your colleague. He is no longer your instructor, and least of all your friend.’
Chapter 5
&nbs
p; Mission objective: Prevent delivery of information package – completed.
Mission objective: Retrieve information package – failed.
Location: Carthan (Djago Desert)
Notes: Carrier Sophie Gaumont eliminated before information could be retrieved. Elimination carried out by Field Unit Commander Tamisa Faber, self-defense against physical aggression.
Other casualties: Sheldon Ayers, Mindguard (elimination carried out by Field Unit Commander Tamisa Faber, self-defense against mental aggression), Maclaine Ross, Bodyguard (elimination carried out by Field Unit Commander Tamisa Faber, self-defense against physical aggression)
Final Mission Report – Mission QWAY:17496 – Field Unit Commander Tamisa Faber
Returning from his usual evening walk, the doctor found Brother Elias waiting for him in front of his home. The house was painted entirely white, made from volcanic rock and partially carved into the mountain, to help protect against the blistering heat. It was of a simple beauty that the doctor greatly appreciated, for it was one of the things that made life easier on this godforsaken island, where he chose to serve his self-imposed life sentence.
Brother Elias did not share the simple beauty of the house. The left half of his face appeared to be melting off - a suitable illusion given the heat - while the other side was covered in horrible boils, common to victims of Soixtet’s disease. His left hand had withered into an unusable lump and his right one looked like it probably wished it too had withered. Instead, part of its skin had died and fallen off - a spectacle of pain and decay.
The doctor remembered how bad Brother Elias had smelled when they had first met. Afterwards, he met some of the others and realized that all of them smelled equally bad. Now the stench no longer bothered him. It was part of the environment, completely undetectable by the brain.
The entire colony looked like it was home to corpses that had tragically come back to life. He wondered if Lazarus had appeared similar, when the Lord Savior woke him from death. He ultimately decided that he probably hadn’t, otherwise the compassionate Christ would have taken pity on him and left him to slumber with the eternally breathless.
Unlike the biblical Lazarus, these men were dead only in appearance. Their bodies were still very much alive and very much suffering. Soixtet’s disease was so incredibly violent, that the fact that the doctor hadn’t contacted it in the two years he had lived on the island was an occurrence he attributed to divine intervention. He felt nothing but love for these people, especially for Brother Elias. Love and pity, profound pity.
“Brother Torje,” the suffering man called out. The doctor greeted him from afar with a gesture of the hand. The islanders called each other ‘brother’ and ‘sister’. It was not because they were siblings, or belonged to any religious order, but because they had all been sent to this place to die their horrible deaths. This common fate created a closeness that could be rivaled only by the bond of sharing a mother’s womb.
The doctor was not ill, but he too was destined to die on this island, so he too was to them a ‘brother’. The difference between him and the others was that they had been shipped to this place against their will, as part of an IFCO program for disease control, whereas he had come here by his own volition. In time, though neither dying nor disfigured, he had become one of them.
That was the story of why they called him brother. The reason they called him ‘Torje’ was because he had given them a false name. He had done that for fear of ever being found out and promptly murdered. Even with the new identity, that fear was ever present. During his usual evening walk, as he enjoyed the sight of the sun going down over the two active volcanoes that overlooked the island, he wondered if it was perhaps the last sunset he would ever see. It was a question he asked himself every evening.
He was aware that, at any second, his head could get blown off, leaving him much more disfigured than his unfortunate brothers. He had no doubt that the man who was looking for him had the resources and motivation to eventually find him. But the doctor had been living in the Soixtet’s colony for two years and had not gotten sick, which was an unbelievable improbability. He figured that meant the good Lord was watching over him. If the most violent disease that had ever plagued mankind did not kill him, he doubted that a mere man would succeed, at least in the near future. Nevertheless, he lived every day as though it were his last. That was something he truly had in common with the rest of the islanders.
“It is good to see you, Brother Elias,” said the doctor. Even after two years of being in contact only with the diseased brothers, he had not gotten rid of the instinctive gesture of wanting to shake hands. He always had to remind himself that touching them in any way would bring them nothing but pain.
“Brother Torje,” said the decomposing man, “Anita has prepared dinner. We would be delighted if you would join us.” The doctor just slightly nodded. “It would be my pleasure, Brother Elias. Any particular occasion?”
“I am leaving for Kastain tomorrow, so I would like to spend some time with my friends.”
Kastain was not a place; it was a ritual. For the brothers who inhabited the island of Kalhydon on the planet Thissaia, Kastain was a twelve day journey with the purpose of self-reflection and meditation. Faced with disease and death on a daily basis, the brothers found solace in a deep spirituality. Every six months, they retreated to a designated spot where they could enjoy solitude, as they prepared to leave this world. Brother Elias was exhibiting symptoms of the final stages of Soixtet’s - the skin was rapidly falling off his right arm, leaving spaces of muscle exposed to fatal infections. The doctor understood that Brother Elias was convinced he would not be returning from this Kastain, so he was planning on breaking bread with his friend one last time, before he left.
“Is your wife preparing her wonderful bread soup?”
“Indeed she is, Brother Torje.”
“I figured, I know it is your favorite.”
“It is, to my knowledge, your favorite as well, is it not?”
“Yes it is, Elias,” the doctor said. He was sad because he realized that this was the last time he was going to see his good friend. In the corner of hell that was Kalhydon, he had made the most loyal friends. The brothers and sisters of Kalhydon were the kindest, most wonderful people he had ever known. There was so much love here in this fetid prison, it made him angry. Why is it that such love cannot be not found in the hearts of people with more fortunate lives? he thought. Why is it that only in the face of the most intense pain, destined to endure the most frightening death, can humanity cultivate this type of devotion?
It was only in one other place in the universe that the doctor had witnessed such love and harmony. It was a place so incredibly different from Kalhydon and yet, in a way, so similar. Could it really be that mankind can only nurture the purest emotions in the harshest conditions? The doctor had set out on his many travels to learn the nature of man, but what he had learned had not made him happy. He looked at the dying, suffering creature walking beside him, and he decided to be frank, for that was all he felt he could offer the man.
“Brother Elias, you can rest assured, I will take care of Anita and Midia.”
The dying man had tears in his eyes. Even those tears seemed diseased, as if they carried within them part of the ailment that was punishing the rest of his beleaguered body. “Thank you, Brother Torje,” he said.
“No need to thank me, brother. It is the least I can do.”
“The least?” Brother Elias cried. He seemed genuinely hurt by that statement. “Brother, you have done so much already, for all of us.”
“Brother Elias -” the doctor protested.
“No,” Elias insisted. “You have done so much, brother. “You have been our healer. We are indebted to you.“
The doctor was sincerely uncomfortable with this declaration of gratitude. He knew that there was basically nothing of importance he could have ever done for them. Hearing this poor soul speak of some sort of debt made him feel i
ncredibly frustrated.
“A healer? Who have I healed, Elias? Tell me, who? Are you not all still sick? Are you not all still dying from this terrible, unjust disease?”
He felt his eyes tearing up at the mere thought of the pain these people had to endure every day. Fate had given them a veritable piece of paradise in which to live out their own personal hell. The island was incredibly beautiful, the most beautiful place the doctor had ever seen. He still struggled to understand how it could be that these people did not feel insulted by all this beauty surrounding them. In a perverted way, it seemed to mock them. It was a beauty they should not be able to appreciate or enjoy. And yet, they did. They enjoyed it in a way of which most people he had known in his life were not even capable. That made him, at the same time, angry and sad.
As they headed towards Elias’ home, their path overlooked the sea. It was evening now. The stars were shining brightly, reflecting in the water. So many stars. Through their very existence, they provided so many possibilities. Yet, of all possible destinies this universe - or maybe its Creator - could have offered the brothers, they had been cursed with the absolute worst. They were the people who deserved it the least. As a religious man, a man who believed in a just God who watched over His children and loved them equally, the doctor had a hard time coming to terms with what was happening on Kalhydon.
He could think of so many people who should much rather have suffered this destiny. They were, instead, living lives free from any pain and fear. But if they were to share the fate of these people, would they, then, not also become ‘brothers’? Would they not be exactly like the others?
“You have taken away the pain, brother Torje.”
Lost in his own thoughts, the doctor had lost track of the conversation. “What do you mean?” he asked.
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