As a Dom, he wanted to stake his claim on her. As a man, he needed to think before he acted. He couldn’t make any more mistakes. Questions needed to be an answered.
Was he good for Cora?
Could he give her all of himself?
Was he able to face love and not fear it could be taken away?
Could he be that vulnerable again?
After a long moment of silence, Kyler asked, “What are you going to do?”
Aidan rubbed his temple. Of all the thoughts racing in his mind, only one stood out as most important. “I have to stop hurting, Cora.” He glanced to Kyler, who nodded in understanding, and Aidan added, “And I need to forgive myself.”
Chapter Twenty-five
Wake up. Work. Go to sleep. And repeat.
Cora rolled her eyes at the sad attempt to get over Aidan. She had loved him for two years. That couldn’t be undone in the two weeks since she’d last seen him, no matter how hard she tried.
She hadn’t asked anyone about Aidan, and no one had offered up any news. As much as Cora wanted to know if Aidan was still going the dungeon, she thought it best she stayed far away from that conversation. Hearing that he played with other submissives would likely make her vomit. And she was doing her best to look at the bright side in her current hell.
One promise she had made to herself was if Aidan’s pain ever affected her in ways she couldn’t handle, she’d walk away. While she intended to keep that promise to herself, knowing it was for the best, she couldn’t have anticipated how hard that would be.
Her heart bled that Aidan couldn’t see past his pain. That he couldn’t get over the hurt in his life to be happy with her. But she wouldn’t bare his pain at her expense any longer, no matter how much it hurt to walk away from him.
Cora was bound to face a shitty time after a long history of great ones.
She’d given herself one week to engage in self-pity. Then she’d picked herself up and gone to the spa. A new flirty haircut with long layers, manicure, pedicure, and skin treatments had made her feel, almost, new again.
At her front door and looking into the mirror on the wall, she applied her cherry-red lipstick. She gazed over her black blouse that allowed a good amount of cleavage in contrast to her skinny jeans. For a night on the town the look worked, especially considering Porter and Kyler had given her only an hour to get ready.
Cora hadn’t been the only one missing action at Club Sin. Both Kyler and Porter had spent every night with her on the weekend. Sometimes having a BBQ and beers, or staying at home to watch a movie or going out to the cinemas. Presley and Kenzie had filled her weeknights with shopping trips and girls’ nights.
She appreciated her friends more than ever.
When her doorbell rang, Cora tucked her lipstick into her purse. She gave herself another quick look-over. Pleased by her appearance, she turned to the door and opened it. Kyler and Porter smiled at her.
“Hi, boys,” she said.
Porter, looking a bit badass in his dark jeans and button-down plaid shirt that showed off a glimpse of his bare chest, kissed her cheek. “You’re looking happy.”
“And hot as hell,” Kyler added.
Kyler wore his typical faded jeans and his navy blue T-shirt stretched over hard muscles. “Thanks.” Hell, she deserved to feel sexy, didn’t she? For too long now she’d felt unwanted, and she’d simply had enough of that shit.
Pity parties got old real fast.
She shut the door behind her. “Where are we off to?” Porter had called earlier and told her only that they were heading out and that she was to join them.
Kyler’s gaze twinkled, the side of his mouth arching. “It’s a secret.”
“Secrets!” Cora exclaimed, bouncing on the high heels of her boots. “You boys know me so well.” They made these past weekends bearable, and she loved surprises. “What are we waiting for? I’m ready to make Sin City my bitch.”
Laughing, they followed her as she marched down the driveway.
At Kyler’s black Dodge Ram, Cora opened the door and jumped into the backseat. Porter offered her the front seat on every outing, but he had longer legs. The backseat in the truck wasn’t uncomfortable for someone her size, but he’d have been chewing his knees.
The passenger door opened, and Porter’s laugh filled the truck. “In a hurry, huh?”
“Damn right I am,” Cora replied. She put on her seat belt, a thousand ideas rushing through her mind at the night ahead. “I’m more than ready to shake my ass on the dance floor.”
Kyler dropped down into the driver’s seat. “A good show for all, I assure you.”
Cora smirked at him in the rearview mirror. “Of course it will be. Let me tell you, it was a workout to get these damn jeans on.” Jeans that currently dug into places she’d rather not think about, but hell, her butt looked great.
She bounced in her seat. “Okay, drive, would ya?”
Kyler snorted. “Sounds as if you need to get back into the dungeon, too.” He held her gaze in the rearview mirror, arching his brow. “Bossy little thing tonight, aren’t you?”
She lifted her chin. “We aren’t in the dungeon, are we?” That was a quirk of being a Club Sin submissive. The Doms who played there didn’t want 24/7 submissives. They wanted sexual submissives, but only in the dungeon. Out of the club, submissives had free rein with that type of stuff. Narrowing her eyes, she pointed to him. “Drive.”
Kyler chuckled softly, shaking his head. “Bossy indeed.” After he buckled up, the engine roared to life and he hit the gas.
Cora smiled and glanced out her window, watching Vegas streets pass by. For all the fatigue she’d experienced lately, the adrenaline coursing inside her made her feel wide awake. She hadn’t crossed Aidan off the list, not by a long shot. Deep inside her, she still held out hope that he’d come around. She hoped that he simply needed time and then he’d come for her. Maybe that was wishful thinking, even mindless dreaming, since he hadn’t reached out to her. But her heart couldn’t forget his touch.
She still loved him. She still wanted him. But she could no longer support him and be thoughtful of his pain—not when it hurt her in the process. He needed to realize what they had and that he loved her, and she hoped he realized that before it was too late.
Time was passing.
At some point, her hurt would turn into anger, even she knew that.
Though, she knew perhaps that was her compartmentalizing her feelings and making sense out of all. She had yet to decide if that was pathetic or if destiny was simply a bitch for giving her a taste of happiness and then taking it away.
She stayed silent on the drive, but within half an hour, she was frowning. Kyler wasn’t heading toward the strip. He drove in the opposite direction. As the truck turned down Kyle Canyon Road, Cora scrunched her nose.
The road led to Mount Charleston, far away from Sin City … or any city that had a dance club. She nibbled her lip at the high mountain peaks with the sun setting over tall trees. “Either you’re driving me out in the middle of nowhere to kill me, or we’re going hiking. So you know—neither will make me happy.”
Kyler barked a laugh. “It’s a secret, remember?”
Dammit! Secrets were only fun when Cora had a hint about the plans. She wasn’t aware of any nightclubs in Mount Charleston. Unless Kyler had some secret information about a party in the forest. “How about a hint?”
“Dream on.” In the rearview mirror, Kyler winked. “And, so you know, I like you too much to kill you.”
She snorted, folding her arms. “Good to know.”
Another twenty minutes went by and her mind raced on ideas of their plan. By the time the truck slowed, she still had no clue. She bounced her leg over her knee as Kyler pulled into a driveway.
Her eyebrows rose at the beautiful log cabin with a stunning view of the mountains. She put two and two together. “If you planned to take me away for the weekend, you could have said something.” She dragged her gaze from the ho
use to Kyler and to Porter. “No toothbrush means morning breath.”
Kyler stopped the truck and cut the ignition. “That is a problem.” Laughing, he opened his door and Porter joined him outside.
Cora exited the truck, inhaling the fresh air that was different than Vegas, even if it wasn’t that far away. It smelled a hell of a lot cleaner and without the cars around it was definitely less polluted. The biggest difference from Sin City was the eerie silence. The only sound at all was Kyler’s boots crunching against the small rocks on the ground.
She scanned the area, and the lawn wasn’t manicured. It was rustic with a world of charm, growing wildly out control. She smiled; it was perfect. Heck, she could practically smell the campfire and taste the toasted marshmallows.
Cora approached Porter at the hood of the truck, and her ankle gave out as her heel connected with a rock. Looking down to her clothing, she heaved a long sigh. She would’ve preferred sneakers and comfy clothes while enjoying the wilderness.
As she took in the natural surroundings, she wondered if this was the location of a BDSM play party. She’d heard of resorts that catered to individuals who didn’t enjoy club life. Curious to discover why she stood in the smack dab middle of nowhere, she settled in next to Porter and eyed his oddly soft look. “What?”
He smiled. “You’ve done good, girl.”
“Thank you.” Weirdo. “Care to tell me what I’m so good at?”
“I’m proud of you.” Porter took her hand and his eyes warmed. “You made it through all this with your chin high. You were open and honest when you put everything on the line.” He lowered his chin, looking her head-on. “You should be proud of yourself, too.”
The love oozing off him descended into her heart, touching all the places that he and Kyler had bandaged up. “I am proud of me.”
“And so you should be,” Kyler added, sidling up to her with a satisfied smile. “You’re an incredible woman, Cora. Never forget that.”
She turned and glanced from Porter to Kyler. These two men had put their lives aside for her. They weren’t engaging in anything sexual or asked anything of her. Doms might be arrogant. They might demand submission. But with that trust was a deep care for their submissives. She belonged to Club Sin, and they protected what belonged to them. “You’re both a little perfect yourselves.”
They smiled at her.
She tilted her head to the side and spied the mischievous glint in their gazes. “Okay, what gives with all the sweet talk?”
Kyler gestured to the house. “Go in and find out.”
She paused and glanced to Porter, who gave her a quick nod. She looked to the house, and even though it wasn’t nighttime, she hesitated. They had driven her out to a log cabin, and by all appearances they intended to leave her. “You’re not coming with me?”
The men shook their heads.
“Really?” Cora placed her hands on her hips, narrowing her eyes on them. “And why not?”
“Trust us.” Porter waved her on with a grin. “Go in.”
“Yeah, right, like that charming smile is going to work.” Cora snorted and said, “You’ll have to do better than that.”
Kyler leaned against the hood of the truck, crossing his arms over his thick chest. “Have we ever steered you wrong?” Cora shook her head, and he added, “Exactly. Go into the house, Cora.” He dropped his gaze to hers, and lowered his voice. “Now is not the time to be bossy.”
Cora studied them. Trust had rested so heavy between them. God, what they’d done for her lately. She might be a tad bossy at times, but she knew when to shut up and listen. She wondered if they’d planned a weekend retreat for her that included massages, pedicures, and breakfast on a balcony overlooking the mountains. “Okay, fine, I’ll go.” She looked from Porter to Kyler, and then she pointed. “If I hate whatever you have planned, you’ll come back and get me, right?”
“You won’t hate it.” Kyler’s eyes were half-lidded. “But yeah, I’ll come back if you need me to.”
Cora scoffed at his portrayal of indifference. Bullshit. But why did curiosity always have to get the better of her? Leaving the men behind, she approached the steps leading up to the big wooden balcony. The log house looked like something out of a magazine. Perfect in every way, with huge windows and large wooden beams.
As she reached the front door, Kyler called, “Don’t knock. Go in.”
Cora glanced over the railing. They watched her every move. “You’re both acting weird, just so you know,” she called out. Their laughter drifted to her as she approached the front door. With shaky hands, she opened the door.
A play party?
A spa resort?
A bed-and-breakfast?
The moment she stepped into the house, she stilled.
Two things happened.
First, she heard the roar of Kyler’s engine outside, indicating he and Porter were leaving. Second, time came to a dead halt. Shadowy gray eyes stared at her, jet-black hair hanging over dark eyebrows, and the hard body filling out his dark gray dress shirt and black slacks rendered her unable to move.
She gulped. “Aidan?”
Resting in a large wooden chair next to a stone fireplace, he grinned. “Hello, Cora.”
Chapter Twenty-six
The door behind Cora remained wide open. She watched Aidan as if he were a ghost scaring the living shit out of her. This he hadn’t intended. Christ, these past weeks he’d been trying to make everything better for her.
While his muscles itched to go to her, he forced himself to stay in his chair. His needs and wants weren’t important right now. “I know you’re surprised, but I asked Kyler and Porter to keep tonight a secret. I didn’t want you to worry or stress on the drive here.” When she didn’t move and awkward silence settled in, Aidan added, “You can come in and close the door.”
Cora stared at him for a long moment before she shut the door. She didn’t approach and her glossy gaze held his. “Why are you here?” Her voice shook as her gaze drifted over the living room. “Whose house is this?”
“It’s my house,” he replied with a soft voice, watching her carefully.
She blinked. “You never told me that you owned a home in Mount Charleston. I thought you owned a house in Summerlin.”
He agreed with a nod. “I still have the house in Vegas, but I’ve put it up for sale. I bought this place a week ago.” He smiled. “I thought it suited me better and that it was time for a change.”
Cora gave a slight shake of her head. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I’m ready to talk now.”
She approached cautiously and stopped only a foot away. Her hands hung loosely at her sides and she drew in ragged breaths. A single tear ran down her cheek as she dropped to her knees. “Ready to talk about what?”
He drew in her spicy scent and desire curled through him. Weeks he’d been without that intoxicating aroma. His cock hardened under fierce need for her. A sense of rightness overtook him. His body ached to be connected to her. His heart reached to hold her.
Not yet.
He’d prepared for this night, thinking over every moment and each word he would say. Now, with Cora there and with the swell of emotion, his mind went blank. He couldn’t find the right words or the perfect thing to say to her to fix what he’d done.
Words could never fix this; only action could repair the damage.
Aidan cursed the way her eyebrows squished together. He didn’t want to cause her any more pain or confusion. He wanted to ensure she never hurt again. With his focus on that purpose, he turned to the box on the dark wide-plank floor and pushed it toward her. “Look through that.”
She scooted forward on her knees and peeked inside the box. With a gasp, she lifted her head and touched her parted lips. He nodded in understanding of her surprise. “That’s my life with Lily.”
Cora watched him, not even breathing. “Why do you want me to look at this?”
“Because I need you to,” he mu
rmured.
He couldn’t hide from her any longer. Cora had given all of herself to him, without ever asking for anything in return. She needed to know him, all the little pieces that made him who he was. For her, he had faced his demons. To understand him, she needed to hear about the demons that consumed his life.
Cora regarded him and her gaze clouded, going distant. After a gulp, she grabbed out the picture frame that Aidan had kept of Lily in the kitchen. He studied Cora’s face as she looked to the photo. Her eyes softened with her smile. “Lily was very pretty. She looks happy in this picture.”
Though a pang thumbed his heart, he managed, “She was happy.”
Cora peeked up through her long lashes, her gaze softened. “Aidan, this hurts you. Why do you want me to look at this?”
“Because I hurt you.” He shifted in his seat, his muscles rigid. “I need you to understand Lily.” Cora had protected him from the torment of his past. Tonight, he faced what haunted him.
Her teary eyes searched his before she sighed dejectedly. “Okay.” She placed the picture frame on the floor next to the box and pulled out the photo album of Aidan and Lily’s monthlong trip to Europe—a trip that had been filled with laughter, love, and adventure.
“Europe, hmm?” Cora flipped through the pages. “I’m jealous.” She studied each picture in the way he expected from Cora … carefully. She took her time and Aidan wondered over what she thought of when she looked at him holding Lily or posing with her in front of well-known sights.
After a few more flips of the pages, she lifted her head with beaming eyes. “Tell me about your trip.”
Aidan smiled softly. While some women would be bothered, Cora seemed more focused on Aidan’s experience. Why hadn’t he seen that before? All the questions she’d asked over the years had been done in a cautious way, never to dig too deep or be too personal and obvious, but she asked enough to know him better. “Lily and I had worked a case that was especially hard on her, because it involved a child.”
He remembered how long Lily slept after that case, and the dark circles beneath her eyes. “We went there to unwind and reconnect.” He looked to the picture of Lily standing in the bustling flea markets. “She loved Athens.” At the memory of her rushing around and buying silly little things and then getting drunk later, he grinned at Cora. “She especially enjoyed the taverns.”
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