by M. Malone
After everything, she wouldn’t blame him.
Then she turned and he was there.
“Rafe?” She sat up, shocked that he was just standing in the darkness, watching her. If it had been anyone else, it would have been totally creepy, but she knew this was his way of protecting her. He’d keep watch without taking any rest for himself. But she didn’t want to be just protected by him. She wanted to be loved by him.
“Please don’t hate me.”
It shocked her how vulnerable she sounded. But it was how she felt. Every moment without him only drove home how shattered she’d be if he left her. Every moment was a painful reminder of how much he was risking because of her past.
Rafe moved quickly, his legs eating up the distance between where he stood next to the window and the bed. He crawled over the covers, landing on his arms, hovering over her.
“I could never hate you.” His nose brushed her cheek, and she heard his quick inhale, like he was taking in her scent.
It was so unbearably erotic, the idea that he wanted her scent in his lungs, that she moaned and moved against him. Rafe growled softly under his breath, the raw sound traveling through her system and settling right in her core. Heat spread out from there, radiating out through her limbs and washing over her skin. Goose bumps rose, and his breath on her skin, his fingers on her arm, and the weight of him pressing her into the mattress were suddenly all she could think of.
“Rafe, please. I need you.”
She clawed at him, unable to articulate the sudden, all-encompassing need she felt. It was like a living, breathing thing, this need to be surrounded by him. Maybe a part of her thought if she could merge their souls together she’d have a piece of him that no one could take away.
“I need you too. Diana. My sweet Diana. You have no idea how much.”
For someone like Rafe, a man of such few words, it meant everything to hear that he was just as lost in this as she was. Did he feel the same urgency to have, to take, to taste as she did? Diana gave in to the desire to touch and ran her hands over his thick, glossy hair and down the broad shoulders that sheltered her so wonderfully. Rafe smiled softly at the touch, clearly enjoying the tactile sensation of having her hands all over him. He pulled back slightly and then tugged his shirt over his head.
Diana had gone to bed wearing nothing but a T-shirt, so she yanked it over her head and dropped it over the side of the bed. Rafe stood and shed the rest of his clothes. Diana watched as that beautifully cut body emerged, looking like an avenging angel in the darkness. He was so very beautiful and all hers. For now.
She held out her arms to him, welcoming him to her in every way. Rafe took her lips in a brutal kiss, pinning her to the bed with his iron grip on her waist. She gasped and moaned into his mouth, her skin heating with every lash of his tongue and every sinuous press of his thick cock between her thighs. He slipped and rubbed through her wetness, using her own lubrications to ease the way as he teased her. Diana turned her head and bit his arm, thrilled with the dark appreciation that lit in his eyes.
“Take what you need from me. I don’t trust myself to be gentle when I want you this much.” Rafe lay on the bed and gestured for her to climb on top of him.
Just when she was about to climb astride him, Rafe cursed and pointed at his nightstand. “Condoms. They’re in the top drawer. The whole penthouse is well stocked.”
The reminder made Diana think of her vomiting that prior day. She put a hand to her belly. What would Rafe think if he knew that he might have already tied himself forever to the girl who’d lied to him and brought danger to his family?
“Diana? Are you okay?”
She nodded and retrieved the condoms from the drawer. When she didn’t appear to be moving fast enough, Rafe got up and took the box from her hand.
“We don’t have to do anything. I would never want you to feel pressured.”
Diana put her fingers over his mouth. “I’m not feeling pressured. I’m just thinking how lucky I am to have you. To be here right now. The FBI was a wake-up call for me. My brothers would have killed me. I guess it’s just hitting me now that I’m all alone in the world.”
Rafe pulled her close and leaned down until their lips met. “You’re not alone, Diana. You’ll never be alone.”
Suddenly desperate again, she grabbed him and tunneled her hands in his hair. Their kiss quickly turned deep and hot. Rafe shifted her back and rolled a condom down his impressive erection and then rolled her over.
There was no preamble. Instead, with gritted teeth he slid home. The first thrust almost took her over, it felt so good. Rafe must have felt it too because his mouth fell open. Curious, Diana rolled her hips and reveled in his reaction as he cursed viciously and thrust harder. Moaning softly with every swing of his hips, she strained against him, trying to open herself as fully as possible. She wanted him as deep as he could get. She wanted everything he had to give.
“You’re mine now, Diana. Do you understand? I protect what’s mine.”
Diana nodded as the first wave of her orgasm threatened, the pleasure just hovering at the edge, waiting to crash over her. Like always, Rafe sensed that she was right on the edge. His thumb snuck between them to where they were joined and started circling her clit in time with his thrusts. The added stimulation ratcheted up the sensation until Diana felt the first coil of that incredible tension unwind.
“Rafe, oh my God.”
His eyes stayed on her the whole time, as if greedy for the sight of her losing control. It made her release even more powerful to have his eyes on her as she came apart. She shuddered beneath him as he continued to bury himself deep until it finally proved too much and Rafe gave in too. His low growl of satisfaction was almost as satisfying as all the rest. Lost in the sweet aftermath of her own orgasm, Diana watched as Rafe closed his eyes and his jaw clenched. All those tight, chiseled muscles flexed as he thrust deep once more, holding himself inside her for a long time.
Finally he let out a long sigh and rested his head between her breasts.
Chapter Eleven
Rafe watched her sleep. Yes, it was creepy. But he couldn’t help it. He loved her. He needed to keep her safe. And he would do whatever it took. It was pretty much all he’d been doing for the past few days. When he shifted, the bed dipped a little, and Diana instinctively nuzzled in to him. And what do you know? His dick was ready for show time. Cool it. Now was not the time.
She needed sleep. And he, well, he had some calls to make. Rafe wanted to do some checking up on the FBI servers about the accounts Diana had given them. And he also wanted to place a call to Matthias. Because while the FBI had their own people on it, there was no one he trusted more to hack the dark web. The kid was good. Better than good. He was legendary. And these days, Matthias was one of the good guys. At least that’s what Noah told him. Rafe trusted Noah with his life. So that trust extended to the kid too.
Rafe slid his arm out from under Diana, careful not to wake her. His dick, displeased about the latest development, instinctively twitched toward her. Down boy. We have work to do.
He grabbed a pair of sweatpants and headed straight for his office. Closing the door behind him, he sat at his desk and opened his laptop, immediately pulling up the FBI access. For a long moment he held his breath as he waited to see if his access had been blocked. He knew he’d put Alan in a tough spot by protecting Diana, but it was for good reason, and he wouldn’t apologize for it.
He was mildly shocked when he was allowed full access with his full security clearance. While he had the access, he’d take advantage of it.
Rafe pulled all the information that they had on the Jewel of the Sea. And all the information he’d provided around the time of Diana’s father’s death. He jumped through file after file, eventually stopping and giving up. Without help, this could take weeks. Pulling out his cell phone, he made the call. Matthias answered on the first ring.
“What’s on fire?” was Matthias’s first question.
/> “Nothing’s on fire. More like low embers.”
“You know, funny thing, when you’re a right sot, fires tend to follow you around.”
Rafe frowned. “Not sure what the fuck you just said, but I’m guessing it was the British version of fuck off?”
Matthias whistled. “Right you are.”
“Look, I can apologize again, but I think we both know that if I had to do it again, I would. You would have done it too because you and I are one and the same. And normally I’d be happy to indulge this little blood feud. Hell, anytime you want to throw hands or knives, I’m in. But right now I have a woman that needs protection. And I can’t let her down.”
There was a pause. “What do you need?”
And that was the kid. Direct and straight to the point. He needn’t have worried Matthias would be asleep. From what he’d managed to gather from Noah, Matthias, more than any of them, had a difficult time with the transition to civilian life. He still slept like he could be called on a mission anytime, getting no more than three or four hours a night. Rafe understood the reasoning. That feeling of always being on edge. But there was only so long that the kid could do that. Sooner or later he would crash.
“The Jewel of the Sea. Have you been able to find anything else on it?”
“I’ve been hunting. Mostly, you know the history behind it. It’s been in Diana’s family for generations. The thing is damn near priceless. Last appraisal was $50 million.”
Rafe whistled low. “Jesus, no wonder Klinkov wants it.”
“Tell me about it. Your woman, she’s the rightful owner. With that diamond alone, her net worth is astonishing. I’m surprised her brothers haven’t tried to take her out.”
Rafe clenched his jaw. “What the fuck?”
“Shit. That’s not what I meant. It was more of a philosophical thing. Diana’s great. Obviously I don’t want anything to happen to her.”
Rafe snorted. The kid was even more antisocial than he was. “Fine. Tell me some stuff I don’t know.”
“Well, for starters,” Matthias warned, “I had a little unauthorized looky-loo around the ORUS files. I pinpointed a direct moment in time and got out hopefully before anyone knew I was there.”
Hell. The last thing they needed was one of Ian’s guys coming after them. “I thought you were the best?”
“I am. But Ian might’ve found someone better. That happens. Part of what keeps me the best is realizing I may not be the best hacker around anymore. So I’m not going to go poking where I don’t belong. At least not for too long anyway.”
“So what did you find?”
“Orion authorized an agent to go to Austria the day before you did. It doesn’t say in the logs what he went for. But he had a two-day turnaround and returned after a trip to the embassy. Very likely, he went for a diplomatic pouch.”
“So he did send someone else. Okay. So if Orion had the diamond, where would it be now?”
“And that’s the real question. Whoever’s got it obviously knows its worth. They would’ve paid Orion only a fraction of it. But they’ve dug in deep and have it hidden. And they’re not telling anyone that they’ve got it.”
“Okay, keep digging. Because Diana isn’t going to be safe until we catch those assholes. And there’s an account number I need you to check into while you’re at it.”
“You got it.”
After they hung up, Rafe leaned back in his seat. Okay, with Matthias on the diamond, he had to figure out a way to stop Klinkov and the Vandergraffs. Because there was no way he was letting them get anywhere near his woman.
Diana woke with a start, the contents of her stomach roiling in her belly. Her first instinct had her checking for Rafe, but he wasn’t there. Once her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she saw the sliver of light coming from down the hallway. Her stomach pitched again, and she groaned. Frantically Diana kicked the sheets off her legs, but her foot caught at the end.
When she finally managed to get them off, she lumbered toward the bathroom like a drunken water buffalo. Once her feet met the cool tile, she stumbled in, only just managing to kick the door shut and lock it before she embraced the toilet.
She had her hair up from around her face in the nick of time before her stomach had enough and released the contents of last night’s dinner.
Oh God. Why was this happening? All the usual thoughts ran through her head. The kind people have when they were sick and suddenly found religion. Oh God, what did I eat? Oh God, did I drink something? Dear God, is it the stomach flu?
After each heave, more and more contents came up until there was nothing left but bile. And even then, her body had zero interest in stopping. For the next several moments, she dry heaved over and over again until finally her body had nothing left to give.
When she laid her head on the cool porcelain tile, she curled herself into a ball, wondering what she did to deserve this. You know what you’ve done. You know how this happened.
No. It couldn’t be. Please God. But she knew it was true. It was certainly possible. And then to screw with her head even more, she felt a low flutter in her belly. But it was too early for that, right? It was amazing how the mind could play tricks on you. She clutched her belly desperately wanting it not to be true. But there was also part of her that craved this. She wanted a piece of Rafe.
But how? Stupid question really. If she was pregnant, then it had for sure happened that day she came back to Rafe. That day that she had come back to help him, or save him. The day she’d come back because she missed him.
He’d come up behind her, surprised her. They’d both been angry and scared. And they’d both been desperate. He’d hooked his hands into her leggings and ripped them down like they were gossamer. And then he proceeded to fuck her up against a wall.
It was the hottest thing she’d ever done in her life. The two of them had gone after each other like animals.
He’d said he wanted to mark her that night. And he had. He’d come inside her. Neither of them had been thinking about condoms.
At the time, she thought it wouldn’t matter. There was no risk. But given everything she’d been through lately, she might’ve missed a pill or two. Matter of fact, she knew she’d missed one when she was at Charisse’s. But she’d taken them diligently since then. That had to count for something, right?
No, it doesn’t.
She finally managed to push herself up and over to the sink. Halfway through rinsing her mouth there was a knock at the door.
“Hey, baby, you okay in there?”
Shit. She took a deep breath to steady her voice. “Yeah. Fine. I’m just going to take a shower.”
“Let me join you. I can wash your back.”
No. She was not letting him in here. If she did, he would see something was wrong. And then he would be all over her until she told him. And there was that weird flutter again. It was too soon for that. If she was pregnant, and she didn’t know anything for sure—yes you do—Whatever. If she was pregnant, she couldn’t be feeling the baby yet. And also, she wasn’t sure what she was going to do. She knew she didn’t want to tell him yet. They needed to work out what they were doing. Things were far too rocky with their relationship. Between everything, her lying to him, his lying to her, her brothers trying to kill her, the FBI… No, they needed to be on solid ground first. Then she would tell him. But for the time being she would keep it to herself.
“No. You’ll get distracted. And then you’ll try to make me dirty all over again.”
“I fail to see the problem,” he said with a chuckle. But still, there was a hint of concern in his voice. She could hear it.
And that, that was the reason she wasn’t telling him yet. He was so caught up in worrying about her it would be too much. She would tell him. But not until they were more steady in the relationship. She glanced at her belly. Too bad they were on a ticking time clock.
“Very funny. And you hog all the hot water. I’ll be right out, I promise.” She deliberately injected s
ome levity into her voice, hoping that worked.
“Okay, suit yourself. I’ll just content myself with making you breakfast then.”
He was going to cook? Oh boy. “No, that’s okay. Besides, I wanted to do something for you after all the things you did for me last night.”
His laugh was low and made her skin hum in anticipation. “Oh you liked that, did you? If you let me, I can do more things for you, and then you’ll want to make me lunch and dinner.”
“Rafe DeMarco, you are a fiend.”
“You better believe it.” She heard his footsteps moving away from her, and she sagged against the counter. What was she going to do?
All she knew was she didn’t want Rafe to be with her because he felt like he had to be. She was making the right call. She knew what it was like to grow up with a father who tolerated her more than loved her.
She was making the right choice. At least she hoped she was.
Diana took a quick shower, then came out to find the room empty. She could only hope that Rafe wasn’t really trying to cook, otherwise she’d have to explain to his family why he’d almost burned down their penthouse.
“There you are!” Lucia appeared in the doorway to the room just as she was leaving. “Rafe was threatening to cook, so I took over. I’m making pancakes and wanted to know if you’re hungry.”
Diana was helpless in the face of Lucia’s relentless cheerfulness. It was so surreal standing here with Rafe’s sister, knowing that she was possibly carrying the woman’s niece or nephew. Would Lucia be so nice to her if she knew all the trouble she’d brought to her brother’s doorstep?
“Yeah, I’m not sure I can eat anything heavy right now. Maybe just some tea? My stomach isn’t cooperating this morning.”
“Of course. I have this great mint tea that’ll soothe your stomach. Come on.” Lucia wrapped an arm around her shoulders and gave her a gentle squeeze.