by Rinelle Grey
“So you think my tail changing into legs is kind of like a dragon shifting?” Cari didn’t sound too convinced. “Even though only part of me is changing?”
“But it’s not just part of you. It wasn’t just your tail that changed, your ability to breathe under water did too, and your ability to understand me,” Rowan pointed out.
Cari considered him for a moment, her head on one side. “Does a dragon’s ability to understand humans change when they shift too?”
Perhaps that hadn’t been the best example. “Not exactly,” Rowan explained. “When I first met my stepfather, he couldn’t understand or speak English at all, just like you couldn’t. But it wasn’t shifting that changed it, it was touching my mother, and forming a… well… a kind of bond with her.”
He hadn’t understood it at the time, and it hadn’t been until he was much older that they’d explained the Mesmer bond to him. Probably a good thing, he wouldn’t have wanted to know at eleven.
Cari’s eyes grew round. “Do you think it was me touching you that made me understand you?”
For a moment, Rowan wondered what it might be like if he and Cari had formed something like the Mesmer bond. He’d always been curious what it would be like to be so strongly and magically attracted to someone. Probably greater than anything he would ever experience.
But he wasn’t going to. So there was no point in daydreaming.
He shook his head. “We’d touched long before you understood me. It clearly happened at the same time as your tail changed, so I think it was part of your shift.”
Cari nodded, accepting that. “So how do I shift back then if it’s some kind of mental thing? And when I do, am I not going to understand you anymore?”
She seemed concerned about the idea, and that warmed Rowan’s heart, even as he was sad about the truth. “Probably. But now that we know each other, I’m sure we can find a way to make each other understand.”
If she turned back into a mermaid again, she’d be leaving anyway. He needed to just be glad he’d had this opportunity to get to know her.
“I suppose so.” Cari sounded reluctant, but even so, she said, “So how do I do it?”
Rowan considered. He’d listened in on his siblings’ lessons, so he had some idea, but putting it into words was harder. “You need to focus on your legs, imagine them changing into a tail. Imagining breathing underwater. Take it step by step if you need to. If it works, then over time, you’ll be able to do it with a simple thought, but the first few times might be harder.”
Cari closed her eyes and screwed up her face in concentration. Rowan watched her, his heart aching. If this worked, she would dive over the side of the boat, and he’d probably never see her again.
It was a strange feeling, genuinely hoping something worked and at the same time wishing it wouldn’t.
At least when his mother had first started to realise she was falling in love with a dragon she’d known he could change back and forth into human form without difficulty. And he hadn’t had a family to go back to, not that he could find anyway.
“It’s not working,” Cari said in frustration, opening her eyes and staring at him.
“It takes a while,” Rowan encouraged. “And…” an idea occurred to him. “What if it’s both? What if you need to be in the water and concentrating on changing?”
“I probably do,” Cari agreed, smiling for the first time. “I mean, if I gave myself a tail here in the middle of the boat, I wouldn’t be able to get back to the water, would I?”
“Let’s go back to the water then,” Rowan encouraged. To calm any of Cari’s fears about being discovered, he added, “We can stay at the beach in Calm Water Cove. No one comes there, and my family have been warned to stay away.”
Cari nodded eagerly, then her face fell. “But… I don’t want to get more burnt.”
“Good thinking. If we wait an hour or so, the sun will be low enough that the cove should be in shade.”
Cari nodded. “That sounds good.” She smiled at him. “What are we going to do in the meantime?”
Rowan stared around the room, trying not to voice any of the inappropriate suggestions that popped up. “Um, we could play cards?” he suggested, spotting a deck of cards emblazoned with the resort logo. “Have you ever played Go Fish?”
Of course she hadn’t. As if mermaids could play card games under water. Rowan dredged up the rules of the simple child’s game and tried to explain them to Cari.
All the while he tried not to think that if his suggestion worked, this might be the last thing they did together.
Chapter 11
Cari sat on the beach, waist deep in the water, and stared around at the cove. The white beach stretched between two rocky cliffs and the sand was still warm from the sun. But as Rowan had promised her, the palm trees cast long shadows across the sand as the sun sunk behind them. There was no danger of its heat burning her again.
She could just admire the beauty around her. If she wasn’t so worried about whether this would work, she’d be really enjoying this. This was everything she’d always wanted, sitting here on the sand with Rowan next to her.
Why did it have to be messed up by the fact she couldn’t get home?
Cari bit back a sigh. She needed to concentrate on what Rowan had told her.
She stared down at her legs, floating in the gentle waves.
“Just concentrate,” Rowan encouraged. “I know you can do it.”
His certainty helped. Cari closed her eyes and focused on imagining her legs becoming a tail again, reversing the process that had happened earlier.
Would it hurt? She didn’t like that idea. But even if it did, it would be worth it. She needed to get home. She needed to get back to her family. Her father would be angry and her sisters would be worried.
She’d let herself become distracted. She brought her concentration back to her legs, focusing on them turning into a tail.
And she tried not to think that if it happened, she’d have to leave Rowan.
It was silly. She barely knew him. Sure, she’d been watching him for years, but she’d only actually talked to him for the first time today. It didn’t matter that he’d been nothing but sweet and kind to her since then.
She was a mermaid princess. She shouldn’t be so easily swayed from her responsibilities or by the fact he’d tried so hard to find a human food she’d like. Or that he’d helped her research ways for her to return home. Or even that he’d tried so hard to relieve the pain of the sunburn she’d suffered.
None of that meant she knew him enough to truly care about him.
Even if she did.
Cari bit back a sigh. Why was it so hard to concentrate? Why did her mind keep wandering? She looked down at her legs, which hadn’t even sprouted scales, and wondered if she could do it. “Maybe you’re wrong,” she said softly. “Maybe it doesn’t work like that for mermaids.”
Rowan sat down beside her, his own legs in the water. “Maybe not,” he agreed. “We’re just guessing here. But I’m betting it does. Nothing else makes any sense.”
There was something else that made sense, but the idea was so awful Cari didn’t want to voice it. But the more she kept the idea to herself, even though she tried not to think about it, the worse she felt, until she had to say something.
“What if I’m stuck this way forever? What if it’s a punishment for coming up here on the shore, where I’m not supposed to be? What if there is no way back?”
Rowan reached out and took her hand in his. “I don’t think we’re at that point yet,” he said firmly. “It’s been less than a day. Maybe…” she could see him searching for other possibilities. “Maybe there’s a time limit? Maybe you can’t change more than once in twenty-four hours? Maybe you can only change back when there’s a full moon? Maybe…”
He was still doing it. He was trying everything he could to make her feel better. Cari stared into his earnest, worried face. “I get it,” she said softly. “It’s not time to
give up hope yet.”
His determination only made her like him more. Her sisters would be totally helping her freak out on worst case scenarios, and her father would be insisting this was her punishment for disobeying him.
But Rowan wasn’t like that. He just wanted to help. And Cari was grateful for it.
Grateful enough that she leaned against him and swished her legs up against his in the water.
This wasn’t such a bad place to be, not for a visit anyway. In fact, if she could make her legs become a tail again, if she could actually change back and forth, as Rowan seemed to think, then maybe she could stay for a little while and get to know him and learn more about his world.
Learn more about him.
Cari stared into his eyes, his beautiful blue eyes that reflected the ocean, and her heart insisted she already knew everything she needed to know. She’d never find a better man than Rowan, not if she searched through all of Laquaria.
And even as she thought it, she knew it was true.
Her father, her sisters, her position as queen, even her beautiful pink tail, all that faded into insignificance compared to the way she felt about Rowan.
Without even being aware she was doing it, she swayed a little closer towards him, and this time, it had nothing to do with her balance.
Rowan didn’t know that. “Woah,” he said, catching her shoulders and holding her steady. He stared into her eyes, and Cari held her breath. Rowan’s face was only a few inches from hers, and she couldn’t help staring down at his lips.
The memory of when she’d kissed him under the water invaded her thoughts, filling them up until she could think of nothing else. She desperately wanted to kiss him again, to see what it would feel like when she wasn’t doing it just to save his life.
Rowan searched her face, his forehead furrowing. “Cari?” His voice held a question, one Cari didn’t have the words to answer.
Instead, she leaned forwards and touched her lips to his.
She heard his sharp indrawn breath, and his lips were warm and soft. At first they didn’t move, and he stared at her with wide eyes. Then he gave a soft sigh. His eyes fluttered closed, and he pulled her up against his body. His lips parted and slid against hers.
This was far, far better than their life saving kiss under water. Here there was no danger or worry. She could focus on the feeling of his lips against hers, the sound of his heart beating against her chest, and his arm around her waist.
For a short moment in time, Cari’s life was perfect. It didn’t matter that her legs hadn’t changed back into a tail or that she might never be queen. If she could keep kissing Rowan, that would be enough.
Then Rowan suddenly pulled back. “I’m so sorry, Cari. I didn’t mean to do that.” Only the fact that his eyes held a deep sadness stopped Cari from feeling completely devastated.
Rowan released her waist, instead taking her hands in his. “I want to help you get home to your family, Cari. I know how important that is to you. I’m sorry for getting in the way of that.”
She wanted to protest, to tell him she had wanted this. That she still wanted it and more. But his words about her family broke through the spell and leached away some of her single mindedness.
Rowan was right. She couldn’t have this. Not now. There was too much at stake.
So she nodded her head. “I know, Rowan. And it means so much to me that you want to help me.” She dared to put one hand up to cup his cheek, his two day stubble rough against her palm. That was almost her undoing. She wanted to kiss him again as she caressed his cheek, to contrast the softness of his lips against the rough texture.
She gave herself a shake.
She’d always thought she was stronger than that. She’d never had any trouble resisting the mermen who tried to tempt her.
But no matter how hard she’d tried, she’d never been able to resist Rowan. Could she really do it now when so much was at stake?
Cari bit her lip and pulled back. She needed to get some distance to help her remember her people needed her.
Even if she didn’t want to.
Rowan pulled back too. “Come on,” he said, standing up and holding out a hand to her. “We’re far from done. As I said, there are plenty more mermaid myths to look at. Maybe one of them holds the key.”
Cari sighed and gave him her hand and let him pull her to her feet. “Maybe,” she allowed.
But she knew a part of her hoped they wouldn’t.
Chapter 12
“Right.” Rowan’s screen had a picture of a mermaid and merman on it, crudely drawn, but accurate enough to convince Cari they might have been based on an actual sighting. Rowan’s eyes moved back and forth as he scrolled down the screen. “Look, they’re saying here that in Scotland and Wales mermaids even married humans.”
He looked up and his eyes met hers and Cari could have sworn he’d zapped her just like an electric eel, except he hadn’t even touched her.
His words reminded her of the kiss they’d shared just moments ago, summoning up a false hope of a future together. A future Cari couldn’t make herself let go of, even though she knew she should.
“That implies they could change back and forth, doesn’t it?” Rowan suggested. There was a hope in his eyes too, mirroring her own, even though neither of them voiced it.
But Cari couldn’t trust it. If she believed in it too much, she might just make a fatal mistake and never be able to return to her family. Or maybe she already had.
“Not necessarily,” she countered. “It doesn’t mean they went back to the ocean. Maybe they stayed with their human mates? Maybe they choose that life over their life in the sea and were never able to return home.”
Why couldn’t she convince herself that was a bad thing? Why did her heart keep leaping at the idea of staying here with Rowan, even if it meant she could never return home? Was she really so ready to give up her family and her people?
Rowan’s eyes broke away from hers, and Cari tried not to be disappointed. “Maybe,” he conceded and went back to reading. “This legend says that some mermaids lured sailors to their deaths.” He looked up and grinned. “That one isn’t too hard to believe. You mermaids are certainly tempting.”
The look he gave her was so hot it made her sunburn feel like a warm caress. She could feel his eyes melting her insides.
Then she frowned. Why would she want to lure anyone to their death? Then she remembered that she almost had, albeit unwittingly. She gave a wry laugh. “Sounds to me like the mermaids were just trying to escape and the human sailors wanted to catch them,” she teased
“That could certainly be true,” Rowan agreed. He leaned over and bumped his shoulder gently against hers. “I’m maintaining you were luring me though. It sounds less like I was behaving completely irrationally.”
Rowan was being irrational? Cari thought it was just her. That thought made her feel a little better about the whole situation. Enough to give a giggle anyway. “It’s hardly my fault you weren’t thinking rationally.”
“You used some kind of magic. That’s the only thing that makes any sense,” Rowan said promptly.
“Mermaids don’t have magic.”
“Well, what was it then?” Rowan’s voice was more serious now, and his intent stare sent a shiver up Cari’s spine. Somehow this conversation suddenly seemed to be less about mermaid legends and a lot more about possibilities she shouldn’t be considering.
What if there was some sort of draw between humans and mermaids that she’d never heard of? It would certainly explain a lot of things.
“I don’t know. Maybe we should look at the next legend,” she made herself say. “I don’t think that one helps us at all. It seems like something sailors made up to explain their own mistakes.”
Rowan didn’t break his eyes away from hers though, and Cari found herself unable, or unwilling, to do so either.
They stared at each other for a long moment, and Cari knew her teasing couldn’t be further from the truth.
There was something in those legends, just not something she wanted to face right now.
Rowan was the one who broke the spell. “Right.” He looked back at the device. “Next legend. Um… selkies. They’re not quite mermaids, but they seem similar.”
Cari screwed up her nose. “What are selkies?”
“It’s says here that they’re seals that can shed their skin and become human. A lot of stories apparently involve the skin being stolen, and selkies marrying humans and having children, then finding their skin and returning to the sea,” Rowan said.
Why were so many of the stories about marrying humans? Was it a sign? Was she really not the first mermaid to become obsessed with a human?
Maybe she could believe that if the stories made any sense.
Cari frowned. “My tail certainly wasn’t a skin, and I’m pretty sure you didn’t steal it.”
“You’re not supposed to take it literally,” Rowan said. “We’re looking for common themes, and I think we’re definitely seeing some.” He stared down at the device again. “See, here’s another legend about marrying humans. Female ‘merrows’ often marry humans because the male merrows are hideous and cruel.” He grinned at her. “I don’t suppose all mermen are ugly?”
Cari grinned too and shook her head. “No, not at all. They’re quite… attractive. At least my sisters seem to think so.” She was teasing, but her words were almost automatic as another thought hit her.
Mermen might not be ugly or cruel, but they were in short supply. That was another possible reason for mating humans, wasn’t it? What if mermaids had mated humans because there were more of them than mermen? But from the way her father talked there had once been plenty of mermen, so the myths couldn’t be related to that, could they?
Rowan had no idea of her revelation and was focused on her comment about the mermen’s attractiveness. He raised an eyebrow. “But you don’t find them attractive?”
His teasing distracted her. She could sense a very real curiosity behind it, and something warned her she should steer the conversation in another direction if she really wanted to avoid the heat sizzling between them. “I’ve never really looked.”