by T. S. Ryder
"But I ought to have recognized that. I could scent the fear on you. I'm so sorry."
Naya didn't want to talk to this vampire anymore, so she strode off the dock. The vampire followed her, keeping several feet between them. Her escort, which usually kept their distance and pretended not to watch her, now had all eyes on the two of them. One was speaking into a cellphone. Naya frowned at them.
"Are you going to mate the king?"
"What?" Naya turned to the vampire again to find bright blue eyes burning into hers. She shivered at the hungry look in them.
"If you're not going to mate him, then after the child is born and he releases his claim on you perhaps you and I can get to know each other better? I'll admit that I want to be a father myself, and I made sure to freeze my sperm during the Blood Moon, so that when I find a willing female she can bear my children."
Naya was so startled that she laughed. What was it with these vampires? They only wanted supermodels for their parties, but somehow she was still a hot commodity? Was it just because of her blood?
She shook her head. "I don't think so. Now if you'll excuse me, I should get back inside. Gabriel was going to meet me for lunch."
He wasn't, but she was certain that her escort was talking to him, and that they would soon see each other regardless. The vampire she was talking with looked disappointed, but bowed to her and bid her a good day before he strode off, whistling.
Naya headed back to the palace. She considered asking her escort for a cell phone so that she could speak with Gabriel herself, but decided against it. This conversation had brought up some rather unpleasant thoughts that she needed to figure out so she could talk to him about it.
Gabriel wanted her to bear him a child. The vampire she had just spoken to wanted the same thing.
Was that all she was to vampires, a blood bank and broodmare? Did Gabriel care about her at all, or were the expensive gifts that he lavished on her–diamonds, cars, a new house, even an advanced copy of the next book in her favorite series which wasn't due to come out for another three months–designed to keep her contrite, part of the payment that had been promised to her? When he came to bed with her, undressed her, kissed every inch of her body and sent her writhing into throes of pleasure, was that because he cared for her, or because she was a shiny new toy that he would eventually grow bored with and discard?
Would he treat her the way her father used to treat her mother?
The thoughts made her shiver and, though she wanted to reject them outright, she forced herself to examine what she did know. Gabriel had laid claim to her like she was his possession. But that claim didn't need to be forever, and many times possessions got put into a closet and forgotten about.
They had not yet discussed what would happen with the baby after he was born. It was something Naya was afraid to have answered if she was honest with herself. She didn't want to think that she would be sent away and never have a part in her son's life. In Gabriel's life.
Even though he had claimed her, she had no way of claiming him. What exactly was their relationship? Was he sleeping with other women? Angel? She always wore those tight dresses but somehow magically never had a panty line. Was it because she didn't wear any? With her perky breasts and tight ass, she was the epitome of gorgeous.
Gabriel met her at the entrance to the palace. His eyes narrowed as he strode towards her.
"What were you doing with him?"
Naya blinked, but the unspoken accusation made hot anger fill her belly and she threw her head back and slapped away the hand that reached for her arm. "What are you doing with Angel when I'm not around?"
Gabriel's eyes widened and his jaw dropped, but Naya wasn't done with him yet.
"I was talking. But if I decided to do anything else, you'd have to deal with it. Because you don't own me. I agreed to have your baby. I did not agree to be your property. I'm my own person and until I know exactly what we are, I'm going to do whatever and whoever I want. Understood?"
She glared up at the vampire towering above her. He could crush her with one hand, but he actually looked a little shocked as she put her hands on her hips and waited for a response. He glanced around, and Naya remembered that her escort followed her everywhere. Blood rushed to her cheeks.
"We should discuss this privately," Gabriel muttered, taking her hand. She let him lead her back to her suite, where Angel was reading.
The vampire woman looked at their joined hands with a grin and stood as Gabriel approached. "Ivanna is still sleeping, but I can wake her if you two want some time alone."
"Angel, when was the last time we slept together?"
Naya's heart plummeted. So it was true. The king was sleeping with the bombshell. She didn't know why she was so disappointed; she knew she had no right to be. They never said they were going to be exclusive.
"About four months, I think," Angel replied. "Why? I thought that you and Naya were on your way to becoming mates."
"What?" Naya burst out. She stared between the two vampires. "He has never made any indication that he wants anything from me but a baby!"
"I have slept beside you in your bed every night. What do you think that means?" Gabriel turned on her. "I laid my claim on you, do you think I take that lightly?"
"How am I supposed to know what that means? I don't even know if you're going to let me be part of the baby's life after he's born!"
Angel flapped her hands at them. "Not so loud! You'll wake Ivanna."
Naya winced and her head swiveled towards her daughter's room, but no sound came from it. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, and turned back to Gabriel. His dark eyes glittered and his mouth was pressed into a thin line.
Naya rubbed her eyes. "I truly enjoy what's between us. I haven't said anything because I didn't want to wreck it. But I need to know what we are. Is there an us? Am I anything to you other than a warm body?"
"Naya…" Gabriel sighed and ran a hand through his dark hair. "I forget sometimes that humans don't know vampires well. I have only slept in your bed since we met. I have only drunk your blood. That might not mean anything to you, but it means a lot to me. And as for after our baby is born, of course I want you to be part of his life. I want you to be my lover, just as you are now."
His lover. But not his mate? No, of course not. She was human. She would die while he lived on. But a lover was better than nothing, wasn't it? She considered him for a moment, then nodded. "Then I will be your lover."
A sigh brought the attention of both of them back to Angel. The vampire woman was fairly beaming, her hands pressed over her heart. "So beautiful," she murmured, then sighed again. "I can take Ivanna out if you two want the room."
Gabriel grinned and nodded. But even as Naya let him lead her into the bedroom and gave herself to him, she couldn't help but realize–he wanted her for his lover. He said nothing about him being her lover.
Chapter Six: Four Months
The moment Naya was certain that the fluttering sensation around her navel was the baby kicking, she knew she had to tell Gabriel at once. Her heart soared with happiness. The instant love that filled her when she felt Gabriel's baby kicking was too much to keep to herself.
After getting Ivanna settled in the kitchens, where she very happily 'helped' the cooks make cookie dough, Naya went straight to Gabriel's private chambers. She had only been there a few times when they wanted to make sure they wouldn't wake Ivanna up with their lovemaking.
She didn't knock before she entered. And what she found had her heart plummeting. Her lungs locked and her eyes widened. No!
Angel stood behind Gabriel, her body pressed against his, her arms around his waist. His shirt was unbuttoned.
"What the hell?" Naya gasped.
Angel stepped away from the king, tugging her skirt down. Blood rushed to Naya's face and her hands clenched. She could hardly see, she was so angry. How could he? It was just a month ago that he said that he wanted her to be his lover. Did he mean he just wanted
her as part of his harem? She knew she should have demanded more of an explanation!
"Naya," Gabriel said, smiling broadly as though there was nothing wrong with what he had been doing. "I didn't expect you."
"I can see that! How many other women do you have in here?"
"It's not what you think—" Angel started.
Gabriel cut her off. "You think we were having sex?"
"Getting ready for it!" Naya trembled from head to foot. She ought to have known. Angel quite literally looked like an angel. She was gorgeous. And what was Naya? Short, too round and too human. Gabriel had to hold back so he wouldn’t hurt her, and she couldn't keep up with him. Of course he'd look for completion elsewhere. "So everything you said last month was just to keep me around at night, was it?"
"Naya—" Angel started again.
"You're jealous?" Gabriel laughed, his own hands clenching. "You're jealous? You're the one who is always telling me to stop snarling, to let males near you. You're jealous now? Do you have any idea how hard this has been for me? Of course you don't, you're human. What do you know?"
"Gabriel!"
Naya ignored Angel's gasp. "I know that I'm pregnant with your son and I just caught you here, about to hook up with this... this skank!"
She knew she was being unfair, knew she needed to stop and listen. And she knew that Angel was no skank, that she was a sweet, kind woman who deserved better. But she was so angry that she didn't care. It hurt too much, knowing that Gabriel didn't feel towards her the same way she felt towards him.
Knowing that he didn't love her.
The king's face darkened. "What did you just say?"
"You heard me!"
"How dare you?" A deep snarl rose in his chest. "You stand there and judge me? Sex is as vital to vampires as food is to humans, and despite what you think and what your human morals declare, vampires are rarely exclusive, except in mated pairs. So don't you dare stand and judge me when—"
She didn't stick around to hear any more. Naya spun on her heel and tore out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Let him do whatever he wanted! She wasn't going to stick around to see it. She wasn't going to keep giving her heart to a vampire. He was right; she didn't know anything about vampires. How could she have expected him to feel anything more than lust towards her? And even the lust–it couldn't be as powerful as what he felt towards other, prettier women.
Now her heart was breaking. And it was all her fault for letting herself fall in love with him.
***
Nobody had argued with her when she had demanded to return to the city, although even now, whenever she looked out the window, she saw a dozen or so vampires hanging around the streets below. She and Ivanna were staying in the penthouse of a hotel, since her new house wasn't ready and her old apartment building was being renovated. Her escort was just outside the door.
She wouldn't have stayed in this hotel, paid for by Gabriel, but her escort had insisted, and she was too tired to argue with them.
"I want to go home," Ivanna whined, as Naya sat on the sofa, trying to read her daughter a story.
"It's being renovated, sweetheart." Naya focused on the book in her hands. It had 'mysteriously' been left outside her door, but she recognized it as one that Angel always read to Naya at night.
Angel had always been around them. She had acted as though she wanted Gabriel and Naya to get together. So why had she decided to sleep with him? Didn't either of them understand how it would make her feel?
"If we can't go home, can Angel and Gabriel come here?" Ivanna leaned against Naya's side and looked up at her with big, dark eyes.
Naya shut the book. Ivanna wasn't referring to their apartment as home. It was the palace. Of course it was. There she was always the center of attention. The vampires were constantly encouraging her to sing and dance for them. No matter what she wanted, she had it in a heartbeat.
It was best for Ivanna to get her away from there, Naya tried to tell herself. She was getting far too spoiled.
Her heart ached, though. Ivanna had truly bonded with Angel. It was like she had a live-in grandmother. And Angel was so good with Ivanna…
"It's time for bed," Naya said, shaking the thoughts from her head.
Maybe tomorrow, when she was a little cooler, she would phone Angel–not Gabriel, she still felt too vulnerable to talk to him–and ask for her side of the story. Maybe she had overreacted, or misread the situation. Even if she had, though, Gabriel's reaction still stung.
"I'm not tired," Ivanna insisted, as Naya lifted her off the couch.
"Mommy is. Maybe you can sing me a little song while we lie down."
Ivanna accepted that idea, and soon they were cuddled together in bed, Ivanna's soft little voice singing song after song before she drifted to sleep. Naya stayed awake, staring at the faint light that came through the hotel curtains.
Eventually, she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep, and went back to the living room. Her phone lay on the coffee table, showing she had missed five calls. Scrolling through them, she found that they were all from Angel. Sighing, Naya slumped onto the sofa. Did she really want to phone her back?
No, her feelings were still too raw.
Instead, she flipped open the text messaging. Angel had sent her a dozen texts, telling her that she was only helping Gabriel get ready for a meeting, that nothing happened between them, and that Gabriel was exclusive with her.
Naya wanted to believe it. If Gabriel had told her, she would have, like she had before.
I'm just like my mother. She phoned Angel but, when the vampire woman answered, she spoke before Angel could.
"I'm sorry that I called you a skank. I was angry and it was unfair. But exclusivity is important to humans, and I thought that Gabriel understood how I felt when I asked him what we were. But he doesn't, he obviously doesn't. Maybe that's my fault, but all I know is that my father was always cheating on my mother. Every month there was a new woman and every month my mother said she forgave him and knew that nothing had happened, even when something clearly had. She always took him back and I hated her for it."
Naya sucked in a noisy breath. She had never told anybody this before, not even Ivanna's father. Tears burned her eyes, but she plunged ahead. "And maybe I misread the situation, but that's the sort of thing I would walk in on all the time with my father, and he always gave stupid excuses. I love Gabriel, I really do, but I'm not going to make my children grow up like my mother made me grow up! Either we're together exclusively or we're not together. That's it."
There was silence for a long, long moment. Naya clutched the phone to her ear. Eventually, Angel spoke. "You need to say this to Gabriel."
Naya snorted, though it came out sounding more like a sob. "I don't think I can."
"Why not?"
"Because if he told me all the buttons just magically fell off his shirt, I think I'd believe him. I would go right back to him the way my mother went right back to my father, and I'd still be left wondering what I am to him and if there's going to be a new woman next month. I wouldn't talk about it because I wouldn't want to fight, and I think it'll turn into a fight if I try to talk about it."
"Naya." Angel sighed. "Just ask him. I promise he's already yours. You don't have to be afraid. You're the only woman he's had since the Blood Moon. Trust me. He loves you."
Naya sniffed, wiping her eyes. "I have to go now."
"Naya—"
She hung up. Almost of their own accord, her fingers found Gabriel's number. Her thumb hovered over the call button, but she couldn't bring herself to do it and she turned off the phone. She felt the baby kick and placed a hand on her stomach, fighting back tears.
Chapter Seven: Six Months
If Gabriel could get drunk, he'd have taken vodka straight from the bottle. But the only thing vampire bodies could digest was blood, and the subtle flavors of various alcoholic beverages were lost on his deadened tongue. Still, he kept a good store of the finest, most expensive wines availa
ble to share with any human diplomats or dignitaries who he entertained.
In the two months since Naya had left him, he'd drunk the whole store, hoping that if he drank enough it would somehow find its way to his brain. It never did, even when he mixed it with the bags of blood he got from blood donation clinics. The prepackaged stuff was just awful, but he didn't even want to think about having a living donor.
Gabriel sighed, staring out the window of his private chambers. He missed having Naya around. He missed the way she laughed, and the way she rolled her eyes if a male approached her and Gabriel snarled at him. He missed holding her in his arms at night.
But was he meant to be with someone who didn't trust him?
He wanted to. He wanted to go to her and swear he'd do anything she wanted as long as she would return to him. And he was going to. He had been about to go to the city and promise her the moon if that was what she wanted. Just as he had been leaving, he received a text message from her.
A text message.
Not even a phone call. It had detailed the story between her mother and father and, as he read, his heart had sunk into his stomach. Even though he was still upset that she didn't understand his gestures towards her, he understood why she would think as she had. What sort of man was her father, to repeatedly betray his mate and break his daughter's heart? If that was all that Naya knew, how much worse must her fears about their relationship be? They weren't even mates, and he had out and out told her that vampires were rarely exclusive.
But why should he have to prove that he wasn't like her father? He could spend a lifetime trying to, but if she wasn't going to trust him then he would never convince her otherwise.
The door opened and he smelled the soft, lilac scent of Angel, but he didn't turn.
"Have you talked with Naya today?"
"We've texted," Gabriel muttered. "Not that it's your business."