“No worries, man.” Chase shakes Dean’s hand. “I know you well enough to know that’s something you wouldn’t do. I just wish I could’ve been like you and not caused the trouble I did. I can never say I’m sorry enough.”
“You just did. It’s over, Chase. It’s all good. I’m about to marry the woman of my dreams. All that shit is in the past. Let it stay there. Right, sweetheart?”
I look up at Dean with a smile and then over at Chase. “Dean’s right. I’m over it if you are.”
“I am,” he says.
I don’t know if I should but I can’t help myself. I go to Chase and I give him a hug. “I’m so proud of you,” I whisper in his ear tears streaming down my cheeks. “I knew you had it in you. Tiffany’s great. Be happy with her. It’s your turn.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN - Chase
Shelly and Matt were gone by the time I reached their classrooms. No doubt Summer has warned them that I might coming their way. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that I get a chance to talk to them.
Apologizing to Summer and Dean has lifted part of the weight off my shoulders. I still have a way to go, but knowing that Tiffany is here to support me, I know I can do it. She inspires me to be a better person. I told her that. And she said I inspire her to be a better teacher. That makes me feel good. It’s the one thing in my life that I’ve never screwed up.
Tiffany is going out with her friends tonight. She’s had these plans for months and wanted to cancel, but I talked her out of it. We’ve spent the whole week together so a few hours won’t kill us.
Waking up with her in my arms is like Christmas every morning. Getting ready for work with her is something else. She wakes up earlier than I ever have and eats a bowl of cereal in bed while she watches the news. I bury my head in a pillow until my alarm goes off giving me a half hour to get showered and dressed before I leave. It’s plenty of time for me. I can’t imagine waking as early as Tiff does. I’d be a zombie by noon.
Going home and having dinner with her every night has been just as amazing as waking up with her. We don’t have to spend as much time in our classroom after school. Instead, we chat at her place and build our lessons in front of the TV. In between quick kisses and hot sex.
I keep telling her I love her and she keeps telling me, “I know.” Deep down in my heart, I know she loves me too. I just don’t know why she hasn’t told me. Or what she’s waiting for?
While Tiffany is out with her friends, I decide to go home and do some laundry. I’m going back to her place tonight when she gets home. She told me to wait at her house, and as tempting as that is, I have to make sure my house is still standing. Who knows what my dad is doing to it?
The place is a frickin’ mess. Beer bottles litter the counter tops in the kitchen. Laundry is scattered throughout the living room. And take out bags have found their way to the sofa, coffee table, and floor.
“What the hell?” I say to no one. The house is empty. At least, I think it is. My dad could be underneath something in here.
A key jingles in the door and I now know for sure that he’s not dead or passed out under a pizza box.
“Hey,” he says. “It’s nice to have you home. Where you been?”
I don’t say anything. I just watch him dart around my place, changing his clothes and eating a piece of cold pizza while he’s in constant movement.
“I have some good news for you,” he says when he finally stands in one place long enough to start a conversation.
“What’s that?” He hired a maid? I could only hope.
“I’m moving out.”
Thank you! “When? Where to?”
“Tomorrow. I got a place about thirty miles from here.”
I look toward the sky. Thank you. If he would’ve said somewhere closer I might have cried. I’ve had it with my dad. I need my space back. I need my sanity back.
“What are you doing tonight?” he asks.
“Laundry,” I say before thinking better of it because I know what’s coming next.
“Great. Do that and then be ready by nine. We’re going out tonight to celebrate my new place.”
“Dad… .”
“Don’t say it,” he says leaving the room. He calls out from the bathroom. “I said we’re celebrating.”
I glance at my watch. I have a few hours to wash my clothes. Tiff won’t be home until around eleven so that should give me enough time to make my dad happy and cut out early. He’s finally leaving. It’s what I’ve been waiting for. I don’t want to piss him off. He might decide to stay, just to get to me.
My dad agrees to take separate cars when I tell him I have somewhere to be later tonight.
“This someplace you have to be…it is the same place you’ve been all week?” he asks.
“I nod.”
“Good for you, son.” He smiles widely. “It’s about time you get a piece of ass.”
I want to push him into a wall and tell him he should be grateful I don’t knock his ass out. In less than twenty-four hours, he’s going to be out of my house and out of my life. Mostly, anyway. If he keeps up with his regular visitation schedule, I’m good until next year. And I’ll gladly take the twelve-month reprieve.
We arrive at the club that’s inside a local hotel. Immediately, I regret coming. The place is loud and it’s definitely a place people come to pick up someone and dance. Neither of which I’m interested in. I should’ve known better than to believe my dad when he said we were going to one of the dive bars down the street to shoot pool and throw darts.
Instead of kicking back in some rinky-dink bar that smells of old cigarettes, I’m uncomfortable weaving through people and trying to find a place to sit. My dad squeezes into an empty space at the bar and calls over the bartender.
“I’ll have two beers,” he says.
Fine. I’ll have one. I still have to drive later and I’m not going to drink so much that I miss Tiffany’s call or have to wait to sober up to get to her. If she called now, I’d be on my way out faster than I could say goodbye to my dad.
“Let’s go this way.” He hands me an open bottle and I follow him through the crowd.
In the back, there is a red velvet rope that separates the dance floor from a raised sitting area.
My dad talks to the bouncer at the barrier and they shake hands like old friends. This guy knows everyone. My dad tilts his head at the stairs and again, I follow him.
An hour later, my dad is whispering sweet nothings in some woman’s ear while I scan my phone on the off chance Tiffany has texted me and I somehow missed it. I sent her one before I left to let her know what I was doing. She told me to have fun. Yeah, lots of fun.
I have no idea why my dad invites me places when he doesn’t plan on actually spending any time with me. He always ignores me and does his own thing. Like now.
“Hey, dad. I gotta go.” I’m about to stand but he puts his hand out to stop me.
“You can’t go yet, Chase.” He leans over to tell me quietly, “Simone has a friend. She’s walking over here right now. You have to keep her company while I go in for the kill here.”
“Not going to happen, Dad. Sorry.”
“Come on.” He holds my back from getting to my feet. “Five minutes. Give me five minutes and then you can leave.”
I look at my watch. It’s still early. Tiff hasn’t called yet so I decide to give him his damn five minutes.
“Not a minute more,” I tell him.
“Sophia, this is Chase.” He introduces me to the woman who sits next to me. “Enjoy.”
The fact that he says enjoy like he’s serving me up to her on a silver platter pisses me off to no end. I told him I had somewhere to be tonight. Someone to be with and he still thinks it’s okay to throw this woman my way.
“Nice to meet you, Sophia, but I gotta go. See ya later,” I tell her. I start to rise, but Sophia catches my hand and pulls me back down to her and placing my hand on her very large and very fake breast at the same time.
Oh holy hell. This is not happening.
I yank my hand free of the implants and turn toward Tiffany. “Hi.”
“What the hell is going on?” The look on her face is rage and pain all at the same time.
I swore I’d never hurt her and the tears filling her eyes are evidence that I have failed. Again. “Nothing. I was just leaving.”
“But you thought it would be nice to cop a feel first?”
“Tiffany, come home with me and let me explain.” I reach for her and she steps back.
“Are you crazy? Chase, you lied to me. You said you were going out with your dad to celebrate his new place.”
My dad takes this moment to join the conversation. “We are celebrating,” he says through a fit of laughter before nuzzling back into Simone’s neck.
“He makes me sick and so do you.” She closes the distance between us, tears falling down her eyes. “I thought I could trust you.”
I reach for her hand and hold it gently in mine. “You can trust me, Tiffany. You can. This is a big misunderstanding.”
She looks over at Sophia. “Big. You got that right.”
“Tiff…”
“I gotta go. Don’t call me. And don’t come over.” She pulls her hand from my grasp and walks away from me.
I scrub my hands across my face, trying to figure out what I should do.
“Don’t worry about her, son. You got Sophia here. Enjoy her while you can and then go get that feisty one later. No sense in ruining a good time, while you have her.” He wags his brows in the direction of the fake boobs.
All I can do is give him a hard stare. If looks could kill, my dad would be six-feet under right now.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN - Chase
By the time I get outside to find Tiffany, she’s gone. I sit in my car with my head on the steering wheel holding on for dear life and trying so hard to think clearly. It may have been my fault in the past, giving women reason not to trust me, but it wasn’t this time.
This is a complete mess. What are the chances that Tiff would see me at that exact moment? With my luck, I shouldn’t be surprised. It just doesn’t seem fair. I tried doing the right thing and keeping my distance from her but I couldn’t. I was honest with her, more than I ever have been with anyone in my life. She knows me, knows my faults, and still sees the good in me. And when I finally take a leap of faith and allow myself to show her the love that I have for her, something like this happens.
I take out my phone and try calling her. She doesn’t answer.
“Tiffany, you know this is just one big misunderstanding. You know you can trust me and I know you don’t believe that I would do anything to hurt you. Please talk to me. I love you.”
The wallpaper on my phone stares back at me. One day I took a picture of Tiffany while she was teaching. She stood at the front of the class with a huge smile on her face and her hands held high. She was telling the students a story about when she took her first advanced placement class, and the textbooks were so huge, that she was ready to walk out of the room. Of course, there was a moral to the story. One of those ‘if you believe it you can achieve it’ kind of things. What I’d give to hear her say, “let me tell you a story” just one more time.
The streets are empty as I drive to Tiffany’s house. There is no way I can let this stew overnight. The longer she waits to talk to me, the worse the story will get in her mind. And I can’t allow her to go on thinking that I went out tonight with the intention of hooking up with some chick with abnormally large breasts. I can’t allow her to go on thinking that I would betray her trust. I can’t allow her to hurt.
My chest tightens when I pull up and her car is not in her driveway.
I take out my cell again. This time I text her.
Honey, I’m in front of your house & your car isn’t here. I know u don’t want to talk to me, but please tell me ur safe. I’m worried. <3u
Time stands still as I wait for a response.
I’m safe. Turning off my phone now.
There is only one place left to go. Home. I’m hoping my dad went home with the flavor of the night, and I have my place to myself. He’ll be gone tomorrow so I just need to keep my distance until then.
I toss my keys on the coffee table and fall back into my sofa, a migraine beginning to pound in my skull. She left and she didn’t give me a chance to explain. It’s not something I would’ve expected of her. But then again, I doubt she expected to see me with a handful of someone else’s tit. That had to look awful to her. Seeing me in the dim light of the club, my dad making out with a woman on the lounge next to me, while I was feeling up the girl next to me. It was probably only two seconds, but it was two seconds too long. Long enough for her to believe that I was out cheating, while she was out celebrating her best friend’s birthday.
My night turns to even bigger shit when my dad gets home.
“Hey, son. I didn’t expect you to be home.” He plops himself down on a chair opposite me, smacking his gum and reeking of cheap perfume. “So did you get lucky? Come home for a shower before you go hit that other little hottie in the boots?”
My teeth clench together and I try my hardest to fight back the urge to tell my dad off, but there’s no fighting it this time. “Dad, I told you not to talk about Tiffany that way.” I try keeping my voice steady, trying to hold back the anger.
“Who’s Tiffany? The one in the boots?” He shakes his head. “Come on, son. We’re not going to go down this road again, are we? I bet you think you’re in love again, don’t you?” He laughs. “Marino’s don’t fall in love with one woman. We’re meant to indulge in female companionship. And when we’re done with one, we move on to another. We don’t get tied down, Chase. Forget this bitch just like you did the others.”
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I shout. “What in the hell happened to you that you would treat women the way you do? You’re like the classic case of a man with mommy issues. Did my grandma not hug you enough? Did my mom not love you enough?”
“Fuck your mom,” he says.
That’s it. I pop my dad in the mouth and I don’t even feel bad about it. “Do not talk about my mother in such a way. Don’t you fucking dare.”
He raises the back of his hand to his mouth and sneers at me. “I never had any intention of getting married or having kids, but she didn’t know how to use her birth control the right way, so she got knocked up and trapped me into something I never wanted. Stop being a fucking pussy, Chase. You don’t want to be tied down either. Love is for the ignorant. It doesn’t exist. You’re a fool if you think it does.”
“Then call me a fool. But at least I’ll be a happy fool. Not a bitter old, lonely man.” I scrub my hands over my face, wishing this was all just one big fucking nightmare and I’ll wake up in the morning and it’ll all have gone away.
“You’re ridiculous. Maybe you’re not even mine.” He rolls his eyes as if I’m such a nuisance to him. “You’ll see one day. Women are only good for one thing. Everything else, you can do on your own. You don’t need to depend on anyone but yourself. When are you going to learn?”
“Dammit, Dad. Why do you have to be this way? Do you know what you’ve done to me? What you’ve raised me to be? A cheater. A man who screws over every woman he loves. I lost Shelly and swore I wouldn’t let it happen again. And then when you dropped by to be a dad again, I lost Summer too. I still can’t believe I cheated on her. It was only one kiss with an old friend I ran into at a movie, but I let her believe it was more, so she would dump me. I couldn't imagine living without her but I knew I didn’t deserve her love. Listening to your stupid shit about her being with another guy had me so pissed that I actually hurt her. Physically. I could hear your voice in my head, taunting me about how I wasn’t man enough to keep my woman satisfied. About how she’d moved on so quickly that she probably never cared. So I grabbed hold of her arm, hoping and praying that she’d say it was all a mistake, and that she did love me and s
he wanted to be with me. But she didn’t…I lost her too. I turned into some kind of madman, grasping at straws for either Summer or Shelly to love me. For either of them to want me or understand me, but all I did was hurt them more, and I made a total ass out of myself in the process. And when you finally left like you always did, I had plenty of alone time without you and without Summer to think about what I'd done. I'm not blaming you, Dad. It's my own fault for letting your words get to me. But I'm done. I can't do it anymore. I don't want to be that guy anymore…I refuse to be…like you."
He shrugs. “Then don’t be.”
He acts like none of this bothers him. I just unloaded years of frustration on him, I hit him even, and he doesn’t even blink. He makes me sick.
“You know what, Dad?” I lift my head to look him in the eye. “I won’t be. You’re right. I’m a fool. A fool in love with a woman who makes me want to be a better man. I’m going to show her every day for the rest of our lives how much I love her. And I’m not going to let you ruin that for me. Not anymore. If you want to be part of my life, then you have to accept that Tiffany will be in it. You won’t talk badly about her. You won’t talk badly about mom. You’ll accept that I’m not your fucking wingman, I’m your son and you’re my father. And hopefully, someday soon, you’ll start acting like it. Now, get the fuck out of my house.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN - Shelly
Matty and Noah are having some father-son time. I sit on the chaise while they play on the floor with the big chunky building blocks. They’re quite the team. And I can never get enough of watching them together.
The stupid doorbell rings making me get off my ass. If it’s another little kid selling frozen cheesecakes, I’m going to scream.
Playing Chase (Against The Wall) Page 10