by Tia Siren
The truth was, I felt lost without Ben, only halfway where I was supposed to be. I never wanted to be in that position, but it was what it was. I had to make Ben understand, and I had to do it soon.
Chapter 29
Ben
It was Friday night, and I decided to stay in, relaxing in my place with my phone off and light music in the background. It had been one of the most stressful weeks so far as a professor, and I was even more nervous now than I had been at the beginning of the week. I had decided to submit my resume and qualifications to be Dean of Students, something I didn’t have a lot of time in for, but it was something I thought I would actually be good at. They were going to be reviewing everything this weekend and announcing who would be offered the position on Monday. I was up against a lot of stiff competition, but the president had looked pleased when I took my portfolio to her to declare my interest.
What I needed to do this weekend was destress, take the edge off of everything that had happened in the last week. I thought about going out and getting some drinks, but the last thing I needed was to end up taking home some student and blowing my chances for the position. I decided the safest thing for me to do would be to stay home, relax, and really think everything through. Everyone around me was trying to pressure me, guilt trip me, acting like I didn’t realize how big of a deal everything was, but I wasn’t stupid. I was trying to figure things out in a way that would allow me to keep my career and be part of Kylie and Grant’s lives. The biggest problem was they wouldn’t leave me alone long enough to think clearly.
Between the baby, getting the dean and provost fired and arrested, and putting in for the new position, my head was spinning. I didn’t know what to think about anything anymore. My life was so different than it was a couple months ago, and though I didn’t regret one second making sure they got fired, everything was a bit hard to swallow. I had fallen for a girl, started an insanely hot relationship, and now I was possibly going to be the new Dean of Students for one of the best colleges in the world. It was not at all what I had expected, and it was way off my ten-year plan, but I wasn’t about to take it for granted. Of course, with these things came their fair share of issues, like the fact that Kylie was a student and not someone I was actually free to be with, especially if I was named the dean.
I thought the answer to that was pushing Kylie away, at least until she graduated, but I couldn’t get her off my mind. Every time I turned around, my thoughts were roaming to her. I wondered how she was doing, what she was going through, how she was feeling, and everything in between. I knew that if I reached out and checked on her, I would get sucked back in and fast. My head was all confused about the logistics but not about how I felt about her. That was the easy part to understand.
I stood up and walked over to the fridge, grabbing a beer and opening it up. I looked over at the time and realized it was only eight, and I was already driving myself nuts. What a Friday night it had turned out to be. Instead of relaxing, I was thinking about Kylie. Besides the way I felt about her, I really missed our fun times together. Watching her get fucked by Grant was one of the hottest things I had ever seen. It was like a real-life porno that I could actually join in on. I had been with more than one person before like that, but it had been very generic and safe. With Kylie, I felt like I could let it go, like I could act out my fantasies and not be judged for them. Grant made me feel like that, too, like nothing I wanted to do to Kylie was too over the edge or too crazy. It wasn’t every day that you found people like that, people who shared your interests and made you feel at home and safe in your own sexuality. It was possible they were the only two who would ever totally make me feel that way.
Kylie was magnetic, opening up and blossoming like a flower in our hands. She had never been with two men like that before, but as soon as she had, she was in it full force, never looking back. I loved the fact that she would both of us fuck her at one time. Usually, when you found a girl like that, she was either sleeping with everyone already or not serious about it, wanting the fantasy but nothing that came with it. Kylie wanted everything that came with it, no matter what the cost was, and when her heart had taken her by surprise, she embraced it wholeheartedly. I was in love with her. I knew it even if I wouldn’t admit it, and as every moment passed, I wanted her more and more.
I missed her pussy, the way it felt, the way it tasted, and how she could make me come in two seconds if I let myself. It was like there was something about the way we meshed together that was meant to be. When her pussy squeezed around my shaft as she came and the juices ran down, covering my balls, God, I could barely contain myself. I leaned my head back against the couch and shut my eyes, imagining her riding me, her legs wrapped around me, her warm pussy sheathing my sword, and her tits bouncing up and down. I didn’t know how long I could stay away.
I opened my eyes and shook my head, tipping my beer back and finishing it off. I had to get this girl out of my head, or it was going to ruin me. I jumped up and headed to the bathroom, figuring a shower would help. However, as I stepped into the steaming hot water and felt it melt over my skin like silk, my cock only got harder. It was so ready to go, it almost hurt, and I grabbed it, smoothing my hand down the shaft until I knew exactly what I needed to do to relieve some of the tension. I grabbed the conditioner and squeezed a bit on my hand, stroking it over my dick. I groaned at the feeling, remembering how silky smooth it was to be inside of Kylie.
I leaned forward and pushed my hands against the wall and closed my eyes, immediately transporting myself inside of Kylie. I imagined her in the shower with me, bent over grabbing her ankles as I fucked her pussy, Grant standing just outside the tub watching, holding his dick in his hand. I grabbed her hips and thrust in and out, pulling her forward and pushing her back again, groaning loudly at the sounds of her screams. The hot water ran over her back and down over my cock, and it splashed up every time I slammed into her. It was sensual and erotic, exactly how I always liked it with her.
She made her way to a standing position, and I pushed her forward, still inside. I put my leg up on the tub and jammed my dick as far into her as I could, lifting up on my tiptoes. Her face pressed against the cool tile, and she screamed out in pleasure. I pulled back, grabbing my cock as Grant lifted her out of the tub and sat down in front of her on the sink. She looked back at me as she bent over, immediately deep throating his cock. I stepped out of the tub and walked forward, sliding my dick into her ass, feeling the tightness inside. She moaned with a full mouth as I plowed into her over and over again, pulling out and switching over to her pussy halfway through. I couldn’t get enough of her body, enough of how she felt on the inside. She rocked back and forth, the sound of her sucking down his dick filling my ears.
I ran my fingers through her ass and pressed my thumb inside, slapping my body against her over and over. She moaned, lifting her ass higher into the air as I pressed my thumb in farther. She threw her head back and jacked him off, looking at me in the mirror as I fingered her ass and fucked her pussy hard.
“More,” she screamed out.
“Come for me, right on my dick,” I growled, moving faster.
She arched her chest forward and threw her head back, her body shaking in my hands as she came long and hard. As soon as I felt her juices explode over my dick, I pulled out, spinning her around and sitting her down on Grant’s lap. She feverishly slid his cock into her as I reached my hand forward and rubbed her clit, putting my lips just inches from hers. She breathed heavily, still moaning from the first orgasm. I climbed up, putting my knees on either side of Grant’s legs and reaching forward toward the mirror, balancing myself. She grabbed my dick and stuck it in her mouth, leaning her head back against him.
I began to thrust my hips forward, fucking her mouth over and over again. She widened her lips and opened her throat allowing me to stick it all the way down, holding it there for a moment and then pulling back out. She reached up and grabbed my ass, pulling me in and out of her mouth,
fast and deep. I growled, feeling the suction at the back of her throat as she pulled me back out of her, her hips gyrating wildly against Grant below me. I looked at myself in the mirror for a moment and then back down at her, not wanting to lose my concentration. As Grant picked her up and started to bob her up and down on his cock, she angled her head down and did the same with her mouth. After a few moments, she pulled her head back breathing heavily.
“I want to be filled,” she whimpered.
I got down off the sink and pulled her down in the floor, lying down as she straddled me with that warm wet pussy. Grant got behind her and pushed deep in her ass, leaning forward over us. As she moved up and down, he pushed forward and back, forcing her clit to rub across my body. She bit down on her lip, trying to hold back her screams, but she couldn’t. She was too far into it. She let out a held breath, the moans going with it echoing off the bathroom walls. I gripped her thighs as she fucked my cock, watching her get it in all her holes.
As she shimmied on top of me, my cock throbbed, needing release. She screamed out, her tits bouncing as her body began to shake, her pussy pulsing around my shaft. I grabbed her hips and slammed her down onto me, thrusting up and groaning loud, shooting my come as hard as I possibly could. Grant had grabbed her shoulders and done the same thing, our voices melding together into a chorus. I closed my eyes as I squeezed the last bit of come from my dick.
When I opened them again, I was in the shower, the water still running over my body, my hot seed circling the drain. I breathed deeply, wishing she was there in that bathroom with me, but knowing I was the one who had kept her away. I needed to talk to her, to try to explain, if she would even hear me out anymore.
Chapter 30
Kylie
It was Saturday, and I was happy to be at home, baking some Christmas cookies and trying to get my mind off stressful things. It was lightly snowing outside, just enough to be pretty but not enough to make it uncomfortable to go out. I was glad for that because Piper had already left for work. As I stuck the cookie cutter in the dough, my phone buzzed. It was Ben. I stood there for a second, completely shocked that he was calling.
“Hello?” I said carefully.
“Hey there,” he said with his charming voice. “Did I catch you at a bad time?”
“No, just making some cookies,” I said sweetly.
“Do you think you could put that on pause and come over to my apartment? I want to talk to you about some stuff,” he said.
“Is that safe? Your apartment is crawling with professors,” I said.
“It’s fine. Almost everyone is out shopping or doing other things with the school,” he said.
“All right. Give me about ten minutes,” I replied.
“I’ll be here, apartment 208 on the second floor,” he said.
I was really surprised, but I was also very curious about why he wanted me over there. I balled the dough back up, covered it, and stuck it in the fridge for later. I changed into a sweater and stretch pants and jumped in my car, trying not to speed in the weather. When I got to the complex, I realized he was right, there was barely a car there and no one in the lobby. I got in the elevator and went up to his floor, making sure no one was walking past before ringing the bell. He came to the door and hurried me in, smiling as I walked through the door. I followed him to the living room expecting to see Grant, but he was nowhere to be found.
“Where is Grant? Does he know you called me over to your place?”
“No,” Ben said, shaking his head. “Do you want some tea? I have some made in the fridge.”
“Sure,” I said, feeling uneasy about not having Grant there.
I watched him pour a glass of tea and put the container back in the fridge. It was steaming, and I could tell he had made it just before I got there. I wasn’t sure what this was about, but it looked like he was trying. He handed me the glass and smiled, guiding me into the living room. I sat down on the couch with him across from me in the chair.
“I feel weird without Grant here,” I said.
“I know. It’s nothing secretive.” He smiled. “I wanted to talk to you alone before the three of us talked next. I have some things to say that I want you to draw your own conclusions about. I’m not saying Grant is a bad guy or anything. I just wanted a minute alone with you, that’s all. I’ll tell him what is said here, I promise.”
“All right,” I said, smiling. “What is it that you want to tell me?”
“Well, first I want to start out by apologizing to you for the way I have been acting,” he said. “It was a shock to my system, and I handled it terribly. I should have been there for you, talked to you about how I was feeling, and then gone from there. I shouldn’t have shut you or Grant out. I have a really hard time not grabbing you up when I’m with you, and I wanted this to be a time when I really reflected on my life, your life, Grant’s life, and what it would mean to bring all of those together.”
“Your apology is accepted,” I said. “I want you to be able to be your own person, to make your own choices, but I wanted you to remember that I didn’t do this to myself. We were all involved in the making of this baby, and when you dipped out on me, it left me half broken. No matter how many hugs Grant gives, it doesn’t ever fully fix it for me because you’re the third person in the equation. You always have been.”
“My other issue, though, is how do I know the child is even mine?”
“As far as I am concerned, and I’m pretty sure Grant feels this way, too, no matter whose sperm created the child, it was made with love by all three of us,” I said. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I want to be with both of you together as a family. I want us all to raise this baby as our own. Both of you would make amazing fathers, capable of teaching our child the most important things in life. I will never feel whole if I don’t have you there with us. Something will always feel off or missing from our lives, and that baby will miss you without even knowing you.”
“It’s amazing to me how much you feel like we’re all one unit,” he said, smiling. “I love that. I’ve never had that.”
“I want to be your submissive,” I said, smiling big. “For a really long time, but I need you guys to be a family for me to make that possible. I can’t have two completely separate lives where one minute I am a single mother over here and part of a love triangle over there. If you won’t be part of it, I’ll have to let you go if that’s even possible and commit myself completely to Grant. I care about Grant deeply, but I don’t know if I can do all of this without you. Grant misses you too. The three of us have a connection that is otherworldly.”
“Kylie, I miss you so much,” he said leaning forward. “All of this has not been because of my feelings for you. It has been because of my fears. I care about you so much. That has never been a question in my mind. I want you to know that.”
“I understand that,” I said sweetly. “But I’m really trying to be understanding of the other part of your life. Being without you doesn’t seem right, but I have to respect your choices, and that is very hard for me.”
“I know,” he said, sitting back. “It’s hard for me too. It’s very confusing.”
He had a look in his eyes as if he were really in pain, like this decision was tearing him apart. I wanted so badly to wrap my arms around him, to bring him to me and make him realize how we were all supposed to be together, but I couldn’t. I had to respect his space, the things he wanted and didn’t want. It was my job to do that and to protect my heart in case he couldn’t find his place with me, Grant, and the baby. I couldn’t sit there, though, and wait, wondering if he was ever going to make a move. I had to be stern and strong in my feelings and thoughts about this because my responsibility was no longer to myself. It was to the baby and Grant.
“I wish I could wait for you for a lifetime,” I said quietly. “And I know that part of me will if you don’t come back to us, but I need your answer soon. I can’t be in limbo, and we have things to decide and actions to take when it c
omes to bringing a child into this world. I don’t want to rush you, but I don’t have much of a choice.”
“I understand that,” he said. “I applied to be the dean.”
“I know,” I said, looking down. “Grant told me.”
“I’ll have an answer for you after the announcement for dean on Monday,” I said. “I have been trying to work through everything faster, to give you an answer long before that, but I haven’t been able to. So, ready or not, when that announcement is made, I will let you know where we all stand. I know it isn’t fair to rest these things on my career, but it’s important to me. Whether that is selfish or not, it’s just how it is.”
“I’m not going to judge you,” I said, faking a smile this time. “Everyone is free to make their own choices in life. All I can do is accept them and move on with my life in the manner in which I see best. You’re going to get the dean position, though. You’re perfect for the job, and you will really help these students get past this tragedy with Jeffrey and Arthur. The president would be stupid to not take you as the dean, no matter how young you are.”
“Kylie,” he said, leaning forward with hurt in his eyes. “You know what that means if I make dean, right?”
“You get a fancy new office?”
“That, yes,” he smiled kindly. “But if I make dean, I don’t see how there is any way we can be together. It’s one thing for a professor to be sleeping with a student. They can sweep that under the rug but not the dean and not on the heels of what just happened. It would be a drama that the school may never recover from, and it wouldn’t be fair of me to walk in there with that intention. Do you understand that? I hate that it has to be that way.”
I swallowed hard, my heart moving up into my throat. I was hurt, and I had every right to be. He hadn’t been offered that position out of the blue. He had applied for it. He had intentionally put his name in for the job knowing he would not be able to be with us if he got the position. Maybe that was even part of the reason he did apply, to have an excuse. I didn’t know. I was hurting, and that was making me angry all over again. I didn’t want to lash out at him, but I could feel myself getting to that point. I felt like he thought I was stupid, like I wouldn’t see what he had done.