He didn’t have many, but more than he wanted to face. Burdened with intense sadness, Lars moved to his right to start at the head of the line of cots. As he did, he noticed Patrick removing an empty intravenous bag from a little girl and getting ready to replace it with another. Noting the location of the girl’s cot number, Lars quickly looked down at the sheet. He flipped the second page and his eyes closed briefly. Lowering the sheet, Lars headed Patrick’s way.
Patrick prepared to insert the intravenous tubing into the shunt in the little girl’s arm when he felt a hand on his wrist. He looked up to Lars. “Am I doing it wrong?”
“No,” Lars shook his head. “No, you’re fine, but....” He took the tubing from Patrick.
“I don’t understand. She’s due for her second dose.”
“She doesn’t get a second dose.”
Patrick chuckled sadly. “If she doesn’t get a second dose she’ll....”
“I’m sorry,” Lars spoke softly. “Supplies and room are limited as it is. We can’t....”
“That’s bullshit.” Patrick reached for the tube.
Lars pulled it further away. “Patrick, I did the twelve hour test.”
“Doesn’t matter. You heard Henry. Kurt’s levels were the same at twelve hours, they didn’t decrease until the twenty-four hour mark.”
“That’s right. The same.” Lars nodded. “Hers are higher. Two hundred percent higher. I can’t authorize this antibiotic when another child will need it. I can’t.”
“What?” Patrick gasped. “You just want to shunt her aside?”
“You make it sound so cold.”
“It is cold. This is a child.”
“And this,” Lars said firmly, “is a battleground. We are at war right now, Patrick. I have wounded lining the hallways, holding their IV’s themselves while waiting for a place to lie down and close their eyes. They need to be monitored. This is the observation bay.”
“What are we supposed to do with her?” Patrick asked.
“Get in contact with her parents.”
Slowly, Patrick shook his head staring at the sleeping girl. “That’ll be real easy seeing that her parents are three cots over.”
“Then I’ll take her down to the cafeteria with the others.”
Patrick saw Lars reaching for the girl, and he stopped him. “No, I’ll take her down.” Sliding his arm under the little girl, Patrick lifted her as her arms dropped and her head fell to his chest.
“I’m sorry,” Lars told him and stepped out of his way.
Patrick nodded. In a way he understood, but the reality was too painful. It had started happening so quickly, and it wasn’t slowing down at all. Even though Lars had told him that when it struck it would strike boom-boom-boom, a part of Patrick didn’t believe it would be so bad.
As he turned the corner and neared the cafeteria, Patrick could hear the chorus of coughs assault his ears. The cafeteria was designated as the room, or at least the first of the rooms, to which they would move the patients who had no one to care for them at home, the patients who didn’t beat the blood poisoning. They would get care, the best they could give, and comfort from the limited staff. But Patrick realized when he walked in that, even if the ratio of caretaker to patient was one-to-one, there wouldn’t be enough staff to comfort them. There had to be fifty people in the cafeteria, and all but four were children.
Heart sinking, barely able to look at the older woman who wiped the forehead of a child, Patrick haltingly laid down the little girl. He parted his lips, tried to call out to the woman, but no words emerged. His throat was swollen shut with emotion. Spreading a blanket over the girl, Patrick saw that the woman had noticed him. Breaking the brief eye contact, he nodded his head toward the child and raced out of the cafeteria.
Patrick didn’t stop running until he was outside, then with a loud wheeze he inhaled the fresh cool air and gagged.
Patrick fought hard to keep from expelling the contents of his stomach. Bending over, Patrick held onto his knees taking in slow breaths. His eyes watered, and it was at that moment, when the first tear fell and saturated the edge of his surgical mask, Patrick pulled it from his face.
He no longer had to vomit. He controlled that, but he couldn’t control his feelings. The sadness overwhelmed him and, like a frightened child, Patrick turned and leaned into the wall of the school. His forehead pressed firmly into the wall as his fist pounded against the red brick. What did he do? What did he start? The hundred million dollars that caused the infected FBI agents to chase him to Lodi would never be enough money to bring back even one life lost to the flu. There was nothing that could do that.
Standing there, wanting to collapse and fold, Patrick started to cry. “I’m sorry, Lodi. I’m sorry.”
* * *
“And you’re sure you’re fine?” Dylan asked her mother who was sitting in Tom’s chair in a house robe.
“I’m sure,” Marian replied. “Go home.”
“You’re sniffling.”
“I’ve been crying. And,” Marian held up her finger, “I’ve been checked. Go home.”
“I will. I guess....” Dylan exhaled. “I guess I needed something to take my mind off of waiting for news about Chris.”
Marian reached out her hand and grabbed Dylan’s. “I believe he’ll be fine. Your father is gonna be, right? Patrick made sure he came over to tell me. Daddy beat that blood poison thing. So will Chris.”
Dylan fought her tears, and she nodded. “I think so, too.” She sniffled, trying to hold back her emotions. “I’ll go. I’ll let you know as soon as I hear anything.”
“Please.”
After leaning down and kissing her mother, Dylan looked once more at Marian and walked out. As soon as she stepped outside she saw Dustin walking up the path. Panicked, Dylan raced to him. “What’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing. I...I thought I’d walk you home,” Dustin replied. “Rose said it would be nice.”
Letting out a breath, Dylan smiled softly. “Yeah. I need to be with you.”
“Tigger’s sleeping. Finally,” Dustin said as they started to walk.
“Rose put him to bed?”
“Nope. Won’t.”
Dylan stopped walking. “What do you mean?”
“She said she wants to hold him. Tigger’s so small, if he sniffs or feels warm, she wants to catch it right away. Sleeping or not.”
“Maybe we’ll all take turns doing that. Keep our mind off of Chris.”
“Mom?” Dustin questioned as they started to walk. “You think he’ll be all right?”
“I pray. It’s the longest twelve hours of my life....Dustin?” Dylan grabbed hold of his shoulders and stepped before him. “I need to tell you something.” At that instant, Dylan realized she had to look up. She actually had to look up to her son. “My God, are you tall.”
Dustin smiled.
“All you boys...all you boys are my life. My life force. You know?” Her hands slid to his arms as she spoke softly. “We all rally around Tigger to protect him. We baby Chris because he’s sensitive. But you, you project this big brother, grown up kid image. You’re so independent and strong that I know you think you get lost in the shuffle because you’re the oldest.”
“Mom....”
“Let me finish,” Dylan stated. “You may get lost in the shuffle but you are never, never lost in my shuffle, understand? I need you to know that. I know you’re strong, Dustin. I know you want to be a pillar, but promise me. Promise me that at the slightest twinge of this flu, you’ll tell me.”
“I promise, Mom.”
“I mean it,” Dylan was firm. “I would die if anything happened to you boys. I love you all. But you, Dustin, you are my oldest and for that you hold this...you hold this really special place in my heart no one can touch. I just wanted you to know that. Okay?” She winked softly.
“Okay.” Dustin kissed her on the cheek.
“Now...be the big guy and walk your mother home.”
“That’s
why I’m here,” he said with joking arrogance.
Dylan started down the sidewalk. “I know you haven’t done it in a while because you’ve been too big. But for this walk...you think you can hold my hand?”
Dustin smiled and leaned to Dylan with a whisper. “As long as you don’t tell my friends.”
It was a laugh she needed, and not only did she grip Dustin’s hand, Dylan gripped Dustin for a little hope and strength.
* * *
Chris could have been two years old; that was how young he looked to Mick laying on that cot. In a fetal position, rolled up on his side, the intravenous tubing laid gently across him as the bag on the pole released its last few drops.
Mick sat in a chair right next to Chris. His hands held onto those of the boy, covering them completely. Mick leaned close, chin on his thumbs, face near to Chris’. He could smell the fever in each exhalation of Chris’ congested breaths. Occasionally he would bring his lips down to kiss Chris’ hand while he stared. Mick never left his side, not for a moment.
Mick would never have believed he could feel as much fear as he felt right then. Not just for Chris, but for Dustin, Tigger, Dylan, everyone. His entire body shuddered with the possibility of any of them getting sick. It was something he couldn’t control, no matter how hard he wished that he could.
The twelve hours had expired and Mick knew the news of Chris’ condition was imminent when he heard Lars approach the cot. Head still lowered, Mick only raised his eyes.
Lars wanted to yell at Mick but he knew it wouldn’t do any good. Aside from adding to the confusion, there was a sound reason that those who weren’t ill were prohibited from the observation bay. Exposure to the flu wasn’t just possible, it was probable. The germ permeated the air constantly, and Mick was breathing it in at a steady rate.
“Mick,” Lars said gently.
Mick let out a breath. “I watched you take out three more kids, Lars,” he said, dazedly. “You think that five, ten hours’ leeway to catch this thing, hey, it’s a lot of time, right? It’s not.” Mick’s voice dropped. “It’s not. Every minute, every second counts.”
“Yes, it does. Mick, every second you are in here counts, as well. Do you understand me? I cannot urge you enough to protect yourself.”
Mick shook his head.
“You are human. You are also the strength for this boy’s family. What if you get sick?”
“Then I get sick. And I’ll beat this, guaranteed. But, Lars….” Mick stared at Chris. “This is a child, a child who’s sick. He needs comfort and love. That’s why I’m here, and I’ll be damned if he’s gonna have to feel that through a pair of rubber gloves and the cloth of a face mask.”
“Your point has merit....”
“Tell me,” Mick’s voice cracked. “Tell me. It’s been twelve hours. You ran the test.”
“You know his levels were high when....”
“Tell me.” Mick closed his eyes tightly, clenching his facial muscles so tightly that the blood rushed to his ears.
“We need to hook him up for his second dose. His levels dropped. We’re on our way.”
Mick exhaled loudly with relief and grabbed Chris’ face and kissed him. “Did you hear that?” Overcome with emotion, he spoke to the boy. “Way to fight. Oh, I’m proud of you. I have to go tell your mom.” Mick stood up. “I’ll be back.” He touched Chris once more. “I’ll be right back.”
Mick hurried urgently from the observation bay. He knew he heard Lars calling out to him about not returning, but Mick ignored that. Not returning was not an option. At that moment all that Mick knew was that he had to go home and give Dylan the news.
Dylan had paced. The final hours were an eternity, but she couldn’t sleep. She went down to the gym four times and was sent away. The results would be given when they were complete. All she thought about was Chris. How she missed the first home run he ever hit because her hair appointment ran long. How she wanted to hear those long-winded stories he told so many times that she only pretended to hear. She felt insane with worry, sick to her stomach with sadness.
She desperately wanted to know what was going on, but she feared the answer so much that, when she heard Mick open the screen door, she spun away from seeing his face.
Mick’s expression would say it all. An earthquake of fright went through her body when the front door clicked. With her eyes tightly closed, a single tear fell and Dylan gathered the strength to turn around. Mick’s expression did say it all, and so did his body as he crossed the floor in one step, wrapped her tightly in his arms, lifted her from the floor and embraced her with such strength that it muffled her shout of jubilation.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
October 1st
If the layers of skin upon Mick’s face were evidence of his frustration, he would have rubbed them off hours earlier by continually rubbing his hands over his mouth and chin.
It was day three into the flu, and it had been the longest three days of his life. Rough was an understatement. And Mick showed outward signs of that, as well. Even though it lacked the standard “rule book” appearance, Mick had his own style of Chief of Police uniform. He’d always looked crisp and sharp, but he was long past worrying about something so trivial. He grabbed what he could that hadn’t made it into the pile of undone laundry. He sported a pair of old baggy jeans. His hair, usually pulled back into a neat ponytail, fell against his shoulders as he kept the front out of his eyes by wearing a backwards baseball cap. He still wore his symbols of authority, the shoulder harness and badge, but they were somewhat buried underneath the long denim over-shirt.
There didn’t seem much time for anything. Between keeping order, shuttling in and out the sick, and making sure food was distributed, Mick estimated he had zero time to take care of himself. He hadn’t shaved in days, nor had he slept much. Every free moment he had was being spent with Dylan, the boys, and his mother. They centered him.
Despite how much Mick was doing, he still managed to project strength. He had to, not only for the townspeople, but for his family.
Big shoulders or not, Mick worried every time another task fell upon him.
Again, his hand ran across his chin. “No.” He shook his head at Mayor Brad Connally. “I don’t have the free hands.”
“What about those not sick?”
Mick laughed. “They aren’t coming out. Come on. Do you blame them? They listened to Lars. They know they just have to wait it out. This task you’re asking is one they will not do.”
Brad moved slowly as he stood up. “This has to be a concern.”
“Yes, I understand that. But, there’s nothing that can be done. As cold as this sounds, we’ve only lost twenty-four lives. More are on their way. We have to deal with it when this thing is over with, not during.”
“The hospital can’t hold anymore in the morgue. Sgt. Dion said he tried to find you with this....”
“Me?” Mick snapped. “Why me? He went to you, this is your town.”
“Aside from the fact that I have to get down to that aid station myself, no, Mick, this ceased being my town a long time ago. This...this is your town. People look to you for answers, and they are gonna look to you for answers about what the hell we are gonna do with all the dead.”
“I don’t want to deal with this issue....” Mick’s voice cracked with frustration as he tried to maintain his temper. “I have to get through this flu, then I’ll deal with the aftermath.”
“They need answers.”
“And you need to get down to the aid station.” Mick shook his head. “I have to go.”
“Mick, you’re gonna have to deal with it sooner or later. Find a resolution now.”
Mick paused before leaving. “Do you honestly think this is gonna be a major concern?”
“Yes.” Brad nodded. “Two doors down, Mrs. Hawk lost her husband. She wants to bury him, Mick. Can you blame her? Everyone is gonna want to bury those they lose.”
“And there’ll be way too many to be digging s
ingle plots. I can’t….I can’t take people from Lars and the station and send them out to dig plots. I can’t. Anyone that’s helping has to go where they are needed. We will bury our dead when this thing is done. People are just gonna have to understand that. And I think they will.” He grabbed the door. “Get down to that station. I’ll come up with something.” His shoulders feeling the strain of too much extra weight, Mick walked from the Mayor’s house, wishing that there were someone else to help carry his burden.
* * *
Lars pulled the partition curtain closed and returned to the small table with Kurt and Henry. “Sorry about that.”
Henry gave a “no problem” wave of his hand. “Hey, we knew the meeting would be interrupted.”
Lars sat down. “Now where were we?” He pulled a sheet of paper forward. “Volunteers. We’re doing well.”
Kurt spoke up, “Tom Roberts said when he gets well, he will be back to help out.”
“Which, knowing Tom,” Lars smiled, “will be fast. I’ve had the same commitment from others, which is good. We’re gonna hit a busy phase. We had our first wave, and a few trickled in after that. Now we’re gonna get hit with the big one.”
Henry nodded his understanding. “The ones who got infected from our original flu victims.”
“The close contact victims,” Lars said. “Yes. Our overall success rate at beating the septicemia was eighty percent. I look for the overall to be around sixty this time.” He saw the curious looks. “Confidence, gentlemen, will be the killer. The second wave knows how well we beat this flu in the first round. These people won’t be as scared, therefore, they won’t be so rushed to get here...and they may wait too long. And just about the time they start coming in we’ll start losing those who weren’t so fortunate from our first round.”
The Flu (A Novel of the Outbreak) Page 28