CHAPTER 4
***JULIE***
JULIE—Six months ago
Cade had held on to my hand as they rushed him into the ambulance. “Stay with me,” he murmured as they carried him inside. So of course I did.
Later he kissed my hand, then snuggled with it. (He was on some heavy meds.)
Obviously.
CHAPTER 5
***CADE***
CADE—Six months ago
When I woke in the hospital, my beautiful saving angel was gone. But I kept dreaming about her. The way she had looked under that streetlight. The way she had cried, begging me to wake up and come back to her.
But she wasn’t mine to come back to—she was The Wad’s (Ashton Davenport’s).
The thing was though, I couldn’t get her out of my head. Before that night, I didn’t really think about her. Not really. I mean, I’m a hockey player at our high school, and not terrible to look at, I guess. I mean, I get girls easy. I like to think it’s because of my awesome hockey moves. I’m a star player, so sort of a star at our high school. Of sorts. But I guess girls are all about my eyes. And my hair. I hear them say they want to run their fingers through it. So I don’t cut it often. (I like to give them what they want.)
But like I said, I had girls in supply. Yet suddenly, after that night, all I wanted was Ashton Davenport’s angelic girl. But Ashton Davenport is a rich tool that gets everything he wants—usually buys it. But I knew he didn’t buy beautiful Julie Drake. The girl wasn’t for sale. She actually loved Ashton. For real.
… for some reason.
But I started watching her. A lot. Man, I was jealous of Ashton. Never saw that coming. The dude can’t play hockey to save his life. But he had the most angelic, adoring girl I had ever laid eyes on. I wanted her. Bad.
But she was so in love with Ashton. I could tell by watching her with him. It was killing me—suddenly wanting a girl I knew I could never have.
So, I was glad when I got this offer to spend a semester in Russia on this hockey exchange program through my school. I figured I’d give Russian girls a chance to get my mind off angelic Julie Drake, since girls at my school weren’t doing it for me. (Plus, you know—hockey.)
But then once I got there—to friggin’ Russia—I got a text from my friend, Griffin Piper, asking me if I hooked-up with Julie before I left. “’Cause the beautiful chick is telling people that,” he wrote.
I stared at his words, my heart pounding, not sure what to say. I mean, the chick had never even voluntarily talked to me except that night when she saved my life with her sweet coaxing. After that, any time she saw me watching her, she’d hold her boyfriend’s hand tighter like she was afraid I was going to make off with her. Which, okay, I’d sort of considered doing. Well, fantasized doing. (I wouldn’t really do it.) I have a reputation for being a “bad-boy.” But I’m not actually a felon. Or even “bad.”
… I just get in trouble a lot.
But I don’t steal people.
Finally, I typed: “Well, if she’s telling people that, then …”
I let it trail off, trying not to have to give any sort of definitive. Since I didn’t have a definitive. Well, actually I had one—but I didn’t want to give it if the angelic life-savor dream-girl was actually the one spreading the lies, which Griffin just said she was. I didn’t exactly want to expose her. I mean, if she had some sort of fantasy about me she was spreading around, for whatever reason. (Did I mention my heart was pounding?) It felt like it was going to explode. She had a fantasy about me??
But Griffin didn’t let it end there. Of Course. He pressed, “—then what? It’s true?”
“If she says so—I guess.”
Griffin: “So it’s true?”
“I can neither confirm nor deny, dude. You know that. Due to the code.”
That ended up being my answer to a lot of people. I mean, the rumor spread, far and wide. It left me scratching my head. Did the beautiful chick just assume that I fell off the planet?—cut all ties to everybody from our school? Does she not realize I’m coming back?
CHAPTER 6
***JULIE***
JULIE—While Cade had been in Russia
Okay, I lied to my boyfriend about kissing Cade. I don’t know how it happened. Ashton (my boyfriend) was just kind of assuming that I’d been sitting around, waiting for him while we were on this horrible “break.” You know, a relationship-break (that broke my heart when he suggested we take it). And okay, I’ll admit it: I did just sit around—in knots, sad and miserable, hoping he’d come to his senses and stop being “restless” like he said he was feeling; that he would stop needing his “space.” So, when it finally happened, when he came back to me less than a month later and said he discovered he “can’t live without me” I was quite pleased. Of course. Until he teasingly said, “I’m sure you knew that would be the case—and sat around patiently waiting for me to come to my senses.”
Well, he sure hadn’t been “sitting around.” He’d taken full advantage of our “space” and “break” and had pretty much taken it for granted that I’d be boring me, and simply wait it out, since he knew full well I wasn’t interested in any other guy. At all.
… only there was this other person that was niggling around at the back of my brain, giving me strange fantasies, and keeping me breathless. Cade Cole. It was his eyes. The way they were always on me lately—ever since I’d found him unconscious from that horrible car accident.
Mentioning tough-guy Cade would surely shock Ashton. And right at that moment, I wanted to shock him. I wanted to knock that smug smirk off his smug face so bad.
So the lie just sort of spilled out of my mouth. “I hadn’t exactly just ‘sat around,’” I told him.
Then I proceeded to tell him that I’d had a “fling” with Cade right before he left.
I didn’t exactly know where Cade went. I just knew he was gone—transferred schools or moved away or something. Learning he was gone had made me feel … wistful. And longing. Totally sad that I would never get a chance to be bold and follow my steamy fantasies about him, and let him do to me what his hungry eyes seemed to crave to do to me—kiss me wild. Mmmm. But suddenly, I lived those steamy fantasies (though only fictionally) as I told Ashton the crazy bizarre lie—that I’d had a fling with the sexy bad-boy that I didn’t even really know.
I will tell you this though—it knocked the smug smirk off Ashton’s face. That’s for sure.
CHAPTER 7
***JULIE***
JULIE
Despite my wild lie, Ashton and I got back together, thank goodness. We’ve been together for almost three years now. He’s the only boyfriend I’ve ever had, or wanted. So when he suggested the break I was crushed. Hearing him say he was restless for something “more” annihilated me since all I had ever, ever wanted was him. Ever. (Well, except I’d sort of, kind of secretly yearned for Cade a bit when Cade had been around, looking at me all eager and longing—purrr. But then Cade went away, and my heart settled back down, and full-on loved Ashton properly again.) (Relief.)
But THEN—gasp!
The first day of the new semester, I was coming out of my sociology class, and then—bam! My eyes locked on to Cade’s. My heart slammed against my chest. Holy crap, he’s back!
Cade froze when he saw me.
We stared at each other a long time.
For a strange, magical moment it was like the world faded away. There was only Cade Cole and his dark hungry eyes glued to mine. Mmmm.
His lips parted slightly as he continued to stare at me.
Finally I choked out in amazed wonder, “You’re … back.”
His jaw muscles flickered. “I heard we kissed.”
His breath seemed a little shallow as he said that. It made my knees go weak—from his irregular breathing—and from his unwavering stare. H-o-l-y smokes! Sparks skittered through me, and prickled my burning skin, and made me feel intoxicated and dizzy and breathless.
But of course, at the ver
y same (convoluted) moment, his words sent me up in flames. Gasp! He actually heard about my lie? (Embarrassing!) I think I would have died of mortification right there on the spot, but the way his hungry eyes were ravenously drinking me in—no. I had to hold on to the wall beside me to keep from toppling over, but it had absolutely nothing to do with embarrassment.
It had to do with want. And passion. And a magnet that seemed to be drawing us together.
But suddenly the moment was gone. A sexy girl appeared from out of nowhere (well, it seemed). Suddenly, she was just there, at Cade’s elbow, waving her hand in front of Cade’s face with amusement. “Hello?” she laughed huskily. “Earth to Cade. Get your eyes off Ashton Davenport’s girlfriend before he has his dad destroy your dad financially. Which I heard him threaten to do—the dude’s dad owns everything. But not this,” she points at herself. “So, come get it, big boy.”
She led him away, though he looked back over his shoulder at me with a strange longing in his gorgeous eyes. But at that same moment Ashton was suddenly by my side, wrapping his arms possessively around me, waking me out of my hungry daze and making me jump—and feel guilty, guilty, guilty. Oh yeah, I’m at school … and have a boyfriend … and not into bad-boys.
Oh yeah.
Ashton murmured in my ear, “Whatever you did with that guy, I don’t want to know,” he muttered. But then he kissed me way more fervently than he had in a long, long time. Like he was a little bit more into me now that he felt he had competition. Especially that the competition was Cade Cole.
Ashton could never beat Cade at sports.
But he could beat him with a girl he caught Cade staring at.
Me.
Ashton seemed to like that.
A lot.
CHAPTER 8
***JULIE***
JULIE—Present day (aka: right after getting off the phone with her doctor and learning about the medication mix-up)
I crumble into the nearest chair. In a way I’m totally relieved, of course. But in another: not so much. Well, not exactly anyway. I mean, I’m relieved (of course) to realize I’m not completely bonkers. Duh. But then again—*sweat*—I made out with Cade Cole. For real. And cheated on Ashton.
Sure, it was kind of the medication’s fault. Sort of. But let’s face it: the medication didn’t make me suddenly have demented hot feelings towards Cade—nope. I’d already been feeling that on my own, due to his gorgeous eyes, and the way they were recently always staring at me. It had me on fire. Apparently, the medication had just helped me act on those feelings. And it, of course, hadn’t helped that I’d taken way more of the medication than I was supposed to—I mean, even more than I was prescribed for the right medication—which, you know, it totally wasn’t (right, I mean).
I squirm in my seat, because … strangely, now that I’m up on the med-issue, it seems to have unblocked something in my brain. I remember more about this afternoon now—actually remember stuff. Not all of it, not even close, but I remember more clearly going to the mall, in search of a job. I did it because Ashton is in New York with his family on vacation right now, so I figured it was the perfect time for a quick job-hunt. After all, Ashton is mega-rich and really doesn’t see the need for me to work. “I’ll just buy you whatever you need,” he’s always telling me, like it’s no big deal—his paying for my every need. But it is a big deal—to me. Since my dad died my mom and I are having financial difficulty. Yet Ashton is always persuading me not to get a job. “I like to have you around whenever I’m free,” he’s always saying. “If you get a job, you won’t be free when I want you.”
I sighed. “But you see Ashton, not everything is free.”
“Okay, well then don’t be free,” he said with a smile. “Charge me for your time. I’ll be your job.”
“You’re making me sound like a prostitute.”
He grinned. “That would require extra stuff.”
“Right. Which is why I need an actual job—I don’t want to feel prostitute-ish or in debt or pressured.”
He groaned. “Please don’t get a job—please.”
He made it sound like a deplorable thing no one at school does—work. But come on, lots of kids at our school work. Just not the ones he hangs around.
Anyway, while he was away in New York, I figured it was an excellent time to sneak in a quick job-hunt at the mall. If I actually got a job—well, Ashton would just have to accept it, since I already had it. But let’s face it: It was unlikely I’d find a job at the mall. Everyone wants a job at the mall. Realizing this, I took extra anti-anxiety meds, just to help me relax.
Then right when I got to the mall I got a call from the bookstore—which was conveniently right there in the mall. But they weren’t calling me about a job—of course. They were calling me to let me know the books I ordered were in.
“Awesome,” I told the sales clerk on the phone—Sherry—thinking maybe I’d hit her up for a job once I was buying the books. After all, I love books.
So, with this in mind, I told her really super friendly-like, “I’m right in the mall right now. I’ll just pop right over.”
“Great,” she said. “Just come up to the front counter. I have the books right here and I’ll ring you right up.”
When I got to the busy bookstore, the sales clerk—Sherry—had my books all ready for me. She glanced at the two books I’d ordered, then smiled huge, “I know another book you’ll love too. It’s by the same author, with the same theme—and it’s on sale!”
“Oh, great!” I said, though I was a little embarrassed that she saw what type of books I was suddenly interested in. But hey, I wanted to hit her up for a job, so I stayed all cheery and scooted away to get the other book she suggested.
She told me happily before I obediently scurried away, “I’ll keep these two books right up here with me and ring you right up when you get back.”
I nodded, “Great.”
Yet, when I got back with my book, Sherry was no longer working the cash register. To my shock (and horror) it was—gasp!—Cade Cole.
Cade Cole!!!
“Can I help you?” he asked, looking as surprised to see me as I was to see him—which was shocked. (Well, I was shocked.) He just looked surprised, actually.
I gaped. And gasped, “Y—you work here?”
With a faint grin he answered, “Well, no. Not really. I work at the auto center, but my brother’s girlfriend is the manager of this store. She throws me hours when I need the extra cash—and lately I always need the extra cash.”
Yeah, I knew the feeling. Way too well.
He raised his eyebrows, asking it again when I just stared at him like a gaping idiot, “Can I help you?”
“Well, no.”
His eyebrows quirked.
D’oh.
“Uh, I mean, I was already being helped—Sherry was helping me,” I gesture at Sherry across the store as I tell him this.
Then we watch together as Sherry walks out of the store. (!!)
What the—??
A tiny grin creeps on Cade’s lips at my dismay. “I guess she forgot,” he says with a grin.
Then he adds, “But I can help you.” He points out, “I really do work here—sort of. I promise.”
With panic, I see him suddenly notice my name on the form from the books I’d ordered, and the two books are right underneath the form, right there on the counter, right in front of him. “Okay, I’ll ring these up for you—Julie Drake,” he says my name with emphasis, since it’s written on the form, and hard for me to deny, since it’s right there in bold print—right on the form.
I swallow. “Uh, okay. Thanks,” I squeak out, dying a little.
He freezes slightly when he sees the title of the top book. (It’s: “How to Get Noticed By a Bad-Boy.”)
The tiny grin creeps back on his lips as he stares at the title. He glances back up at me, an amused twinkle lighting up his gorgeous eyes. “It’s easy, really,” he says. “Just stare at them the way you do when you think t
hey aren’t looking.”
He winks, “Oh, and spread rumors that you made out with him.”
Flames ignite through me.
I open my mouth, then close it. I mean, what can I say? I did that—and he knows it. (But it was only to make Ashton stop taking me for granted—not to get noticed.) Only, I can’t tell him this. I can’t say anything, actually. Instead, all I can do is hold on to the counter to keep from fainting.
“Oh, wait—sorry,” Cade says quickly, sounding concerned. Alarmed even. “Sometimes I’m a jerk—I’m sorry.”
Right.
He quickly rings me up, saying it again, “sorry” but what he said had me needing to pop another pill. Which I did, as soon as I scurried away.
But only moments after I made my speedy exit, Cade came sauntering out of the store—apparently after me.
“Hey, I’m really sorry about what I said,” he says ultra-gently. “I was just messing around. I didn’t mean to make you pass-out.”
Okay, I want to be clear: I didn’t actually pass-out.
… but apparently, I looked like I was going to. You know, since he bothered to come out here and apologize—again. Him, the big tough-guy that Ashton is secretly afraid of. Ashton, who is president of the whole friggin’ school.
I bite my lip, as unnerved by Cade’s apology as I am by what he said in the store. “No, it’s okay,” I murmur. “I mean—” I roll my eyes “—it was the truth, I guess.”
Cade grins faintly. “But I didn’t need to throw it in your face.” He adds, “—whatever it was about.”
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