Honey glanced at her, saw her nerves and looked at the woman still sitting in the armchair. She appeared about Honey’s own height, slim, with glossy dark hair that fell to her shoulders. Her makeup, though heavy, was expertly applied, her lips outlined in dark red. She wore tight jeans and a scarlet blouse, undone one button too far for modesty. She looked beautiful and exotic, and she held herself with the confidence of someone who knew that the opposite sex found them attractive.
“This is Cate, one of Dex’s old friends who’s come up for the wedding,” Lily said, her voice so bright that Honey could tell she was scared.
“Cate,” Honey said flatly. “You mean Cathryn.”
Chapter Nineteen
The woman’s lips curved. “That may have been a slight fib.” She sent an apologetic glance to a panicky Lily. “Sorry, sweetie.”
“She said you’d asked her to meet you here,” Lily said, the colour fading from her face. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Honey said, although it wasn’t. But she couldn’t blame Lily—the woman was clearly skilled at manipulating people to do what she wanted. “Do me a favour, Lily? Give Koru a ring, eh? Let him know I got home okay?” She caught Lily’s gaze. Her sister gave a slight nod and scurried from the room.
The woman ran her gaze down Honey thoughtfully. “So you’re the one Dex is marrying?”
“Yes,” Honey said, not missing the jealousy that lit the woman’s eyes at her answer. Her first thought, crazily, was that she hoped the other woman couldn’t tell she’d been crying. Crying was a sign of weakness, and after all the hassle in the courtroom, the last thing Honey felt in the mood to show at that moment was vulnerability.
Refusing to wipe under her eyes, she forced herself not to take an automatic step back and stood her ground. “I think you should leave,” she said.
Cathryn made no sign of getting up. “But I haven’t finished my tea,” she protested, sipping from the cup Lily must have made for her. “Please, come and sit down.”
Conscious that she could hardly grab the woman and haul her out, Honey remained where she was. Her heart pounded so hard she wouldn’t have been surprised if it had leapt out of her chest and boinged over to splat the woman in the face. She had to calm down or she’d end up passing out.
She walked over to the breakfast bar and placed her handbag there, then leaned against the bar, reminding herself how Dex had kissed her there and protested he loved her only the night before. “What do you want?”
Cathryn surveyed her, eerily calm. “I wanted to see what the competition was like.” Her gaze rested on Honey’s curves and she raised an eyebrow. “He certainly likes them plumper than he used to. Still, tastes change, I guess.”
Refusing to rise to the insult and fighting an urge to cover her stomach with her hands, Honey just raised an eyebrow. “Competition? That implies a contest, that there’s a rivalry between us. That we’re both competing for the affections of the same man. I hardly think that’s the case, do you? Didn’t he leave you at the altar? Or am I mistaken?”
Cathryn’s lips curved with a smug, triumphant smile. “Oh…he hasn’t told you.” Honey refused to ask the question, but Cathryn answered her as if she had spoken. “We went for coffee on Monday.”
Even though her heart seemed to stutter to a halt, Honey just waved a hand. “Goodness. Dex went out for coffee with someone. What a shock. Call the tabloids.”
“A coffee that he clearly didn’t want to tell you about.”
“I don’t expect him to account for every minute of his day.” But Honey’s throat tightened. He hadn’t told her he’d seen Cathryn. Why hadn’t he told her?
“Well, and also having coffee with your ex-girlfriend isn’t the best thing to tell your fiancée.” Cathryn’s eyes glinted. “Especially when it ended with a kiss.”
Honey held her breath.
It wasn’t true. The woman was a born liar and had tried to manipulate Dex into marrying her by saying she was pregnant. She could hardly be trusted. She was a scheming bitch who’d turned up to ruin Dex’s wedding because he’d hurt her and left her.
And yet…Monday. Honey’s brain worked furiously. It made sense.
That was why he’d been weird, and why he hadn’t reacted to her at first last night—why she’d been so certain he was going to call off the wedding. She’d been right. He had been having second thoughts.
So…why had he not finished it then? If it was true and he had—for whatever reason—kissed Cathryn, if he’d suddenly realised it was Cathryn he really loved and he’d decided he couldn’t get married, why had he not said so? She’d given him the opportunity, but in spite of his reticence, he hadn’t looked cold. Only sad. And scared.
He might have seen Cathryn, might even have kissed her, but he loved Honey. That had been obvious the night before. That hadn’t changed. He obviously hadn’t slept with the woman because she would definitely have thrown that in Honey’s face. It must have been a brief kiss, a fleeting weakness. Was she going to throw away her future because of a moment’s stupidity on his part?
Starting to grow dizzy and realising she was still holding her breath, she let it out slowly. For a moment she felt as if she were teetering on the edge of a precipice. One inch further and she would topple to her doom, one inch back and she would be safe. Which way would she fall?
Turning, taking her time, she walked into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. Then she walked slowly back to lean against the bar. She sipped the water, keeping her gaze fixed on an interested Cathryn. Then she placed the glass on the counter.
“So?” she said.
Cathryn blinked and gave an incredulous laugh. “Jeez, you’re a cold one. You heard what I said, right? He kissed me. And I don’t just mean a peck on the cheek. He thrust his tongue so far in my mouth he could have tasted my tonsils.”
Trying extremely hard not to vomit at the thought of Dex’s mouth kissing those scarlet lips, Honey refused to react. “Yes, I heard you. And now you’ve announced your little revelation, I think you should go.”
Cathryn stood and placed the cup in its saucer with a rattle. “You’re fucking crazy. What woman in her right mind wouldn’t get jealous at the thought of her fiancée kissing someone else?”
“That’s between me and Dex,” Honey said, wondering where Lily was. Had she been able to contact Koru? Where the hell was her brother when she needed him?
Cathryn walked around the sofa to stand a few feet in front of her. “I don’t get it. What the hell does he see in you? You’re cold as a fish. How does he cope with that? You really think you’re going to be able to keep him interested?” She looked genuinely puzzled.
“Oh don’t worry about us,” Honey said with more confidence than she felt. “We’ll be fine.”
“Perhaps you have an open relationship?” Cathryn looked intrigued. “Maybe you expect him to go off with other women? Would it really not bother you?”
The thought made her want to punch Cathryn’s teeth down her throat, but Honey clenched her fists and fought for control. “My life is of no concern to you.”
Cathryn moistened her red lips. “He told me you hadn’t slept together yet.”
For the first time, anger rather than panic and hurt rose to the fore at the thought that Dex had discussed their private life with his ex-girlfriend. “What of it?”
“You’re not…oh my God, you’re not a virgin, are you?” She looked highly amused.
At least Dex hadn’t told her about Ian and her past, thought Honey, but it was scant consolation. At that moment, she hated him for sharing something so personal, especially with the woman who’d once been a part of his life. How could he have done that? Obviously, he’d thought to keep it a secret from her. Maybe he just didn’t want to hurt her, but that didn’t make it better.
She didn’t know what it meant for their future. She would have to sit down and think about it all, and then she’d have to talk to him. But that was a problem for later. For now, she wanted this wom
an out of her house, and fast. “That’s absolutely none of your business. Please leave.”
Cathryn ignored her. “Holy heck, you have absolutely no idea what you’re letting yourself in for, do you?”
What the hell did that mean? “Please leave now, before I call the police.” She didn’t miss the irony that it might be Dex who received the call.
Cathryn grinned. “Perhaps I should give you a few ideas, you know, girl to girl?”
Honey started walking to the door, but Cathryn put her arm across to the wall, halting her exit.
“Would you like a list of everything we did in the bedroom?” she said huskily. “Every dirty little thing we got up to, so you know what to expect?”
Honey was shaking now. “Get out of my way.”
“I never knew before I met Dex just how many different positions a couple could have sex in, and how many times in one night a man could manage it!”
Galled at the thought of the two of them swinging from the chandeliers and screwing like bunnies, and incensed that a small part of her wanted to ask what Cathryn had meant by the comment You have absolutely no idea what you’re letting yourself in for, do you? Honey pushed the woman’s arm. “Get out!”
“I had no idea how many types of sex toys there were either. Or where he could put them. He’s very inventive.”
Honey finally shoved the woman’s arm aside and walked out to the front door. She wrenched it open and stood back. “Get out.”
Cathryn stopped before her. “He likes oral.” She licked her red lips. “Want me to tell you what he tastes like?”
“Get out!” Honey yelled.
“Got any lube?” Cathryn’s eyes looked feverish, taunting. “If not, you’d better get some because you’re going to need it. He likes to fuck a girl hard every which way, including—”
Her words ended with a crack as Honey slapped her across the face. Cathryn stumbled, but before she could draw breath, Honey pushed her out and shut the door behind her.
Cathryn pounded on the door. “Open it, bitch!”
Honey backed away, shaking and breaking out in a cold sweat. Where the hell was Lily?
Cathryn stopped, obviously realising Honey wasn’t going to open the door. “He’s already left one woman at the altar,” she yelled, her voice muffled through the wood. “Aren’t you worried he’s going to do it again?”
The sound of smashing glass filled the air—her windscreen probably, Honey thought wildly. A car started and reversed up the drive. She could still hear the engine roaring as it sped off toward the state highway.
She ran to the bathroom and barely made it to the toilet before she vomited. Again and again she retched, throwing up the contents of her stomach until only bile remained.
Finally, she sank onto the floor. Tears poured down her cheeks. Conscious of the fact that she was losing it—that she was dissolving like a painting caught in the rain—she sank her hands into her hair and said over and over again, “It’s not the end of the world. It’s not the end of the world.”
But it felt like it. And she knew nothing would be the same again.
Chapter Twenty
Dex finished work at five thirty and walked down to Matariki. The café had closed, but when he knocked on the door, Koru—who had been sitting at one of the tables working on some paperwork—came over and unlatched it.
The two men stared at each other across the threshold of the shop.
“I think we need to talk,” Dex said. It had taken him all day to work up the courage to face Honey’s brother.
“You think?” Koru stepped out and indicated one of the wooden tables on the tiles outside the café. “Have a seat.”
Dex sat, thankful that Koru hadn’t immediately tried to knock his teeth down his throat. That boded well. Didn’t it?
Koru sat opposite him and leaned back in his chair, one arm hooked over the back, playing with a pen with his other hand. He didn’t say anything.
Dex placed his police officer’s hat on the table and leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “Cam said you wanted to cut off my dick and stuff it down my throat.”
That brought a wry smile to Koru’s face. “I may have said that.”
“I wouldn’t blame you if you did. I’m sorry.”
Koru’s smile turned to a frown. “I don’t get why you did it. I thought you loved Honey.”
“I do. Christ I do.” Dex rested his head in his hands. “It was stupid. It wasn’t a loving kiss—I was mad. Cathryn kept talking and saying awful things, and I wanted to shut her up.”
“You could have just said ‘please shut the fuck up.’”
“I know. I can’t excuse it.” Dex decided the best course of action was to tell the truth rather than pussyfoot around. Koru was a good mate and he felt almost as devastated that he’d upset him and his father as that he’d upset Honey. Almost. “I don’t know what happened. I let it slip that Honey and I haven’t slept together yet.”
“Jeez, why?”
“I don’t know. I think I wanted to prove to Cathryn that we—Honey and I—are special. That it goes beyond sex, you know? Because that’s all Cathryn and I were about. And it was good—I can’t deny it. Or bad, depending on how you look at it. Bad, bad sex.” He sank his fingers into his hair. “And she started taunting me about it, asking me what I’d do if Honey doesn’t want to do the sort of things I like…” His voice tailed off, and he sighed. “It’s been such a long time—six months since I met Honey. I’m so keyed up, and nervous about the weekend. I just…snapped, I guess. Maybe I wanted to remind myself why I left her. Or maybe I’m just an evil bastard deep down, I don’t know. It was wrong and I wish I hadn’t done it. And I am sorry.”
He fell quiet. A brief shower pattered on the roofs of the shops in the tiny mall, and every now and again one found its way through the latticework of flowers above their heads and landed on his skin. The air smelled of autumn, of dying leaves from the trees lining the north side of the mall, of the end of summer.
He leaned back in his chair, exhausted, wishing it was Saturday and he was married, and he could just whisk Honey away to their honeymoon destination alone.
“I always thought waiting until the wedding night was a crazy idea,” Koru said. To Dex’s relief, Koru’s lips curved up at the corner. “But I admired you both for it—and especially you. It’s not easy for a guy to go so long, but I knew you wanted to do it because of your ex, and also that you understood Honey better in two weeks than Mc-Fucking-Idiot did in two years. All women like to be treasured, to feel special, but Honey especially after what happened to her, and the fact that you were willing to wait rated you highly in my book.”
Dex picked at flaking skin on his knuckles. “I do love her.”
“Yeah, I know. You’re not evil, Dex. You’re just a guy. We’re all led by our dicks, and sometimes it feels like we don’t even have a choice, you know? Women think that’s a get out clause and that we’re weak, but I don’t think it’s that. Hormones are powerful things.”
“Your dad said women are like sirens,” Dex murmured, remembering what Cam had told him about the girl who’d refused to accept her relationship with Koru was over. “He said they call out to your soul and you go running whether you want to or not.”
“He’s right. Did Honey tell you that Mum was married when Dad met her?”
Dex’s eyes widened. “No!”
“We don’t talk about it much now—she probably forgot. Mum got married at seventeen, here in New Zealand, to an older guy. She was unhappy at home with her parents and I think she just wanted to escape. A year later Dad came on holiday here with a mate who was visiting his folks. He said he just walked in a café one day and Wham! That was it. He knew she was married, but he couldn’t keep away from her. He persuaded her to leave her husband and fly back with him. It was the scandal of the year in the small English town he lived in. But he didn’t care. He said he had no choice in the matter. She was his the moment he saw her whether she wanted to be his
or not.”
Dex shook his head. “I never knew.”
“Yeah. That’s what women do to us. And look, not that I know anything—or want to know anything—about my sister’s sex life,” Koru continued, “but I don’t think you should worry too much about Honey in bed. I’ve seen the way she looks at you. She lights up like a candle every time you’re near. And that’s the reason I’ll let it this go—this time.”
Dex met Koru’s brown-eyed gaze and let out a slow, shaky breath of relief.
“On one condition,” Koru said. “That you don’t tell her out of some fucking do-gooder need to absolve yourself.”
“I won’t.”
“She won’t be able to cope with it, Dex.”
“I won’t. I promise.”
Koru nodded. “All right. Let’s forget about it. Are you going over there now?”
“Yeah. Any chance of a coffee before I go?”
“I’ve just cleaned the machine…” He sighed. “Yeah, I guess.”
The two men walked into the shop, talking about the rugby game that night, and Dex’s heart felt a little lighter for the first time in days. He was going to get through this. He’d take it as a warning shot across his bow. He couldn’t think that his past would ever be over and done—it would always be there, buried like an archaeological artefact, waiting to be uncovered. And maybe one day the winds of time would blow the surface dust away and it would rear its ugly head again, but he’d deal with it then.
Deep inside, a little voice reminded him that Cathryn could still be in Kerikeri, but he squashed it like a bug and refused to listen.
Koru set to making him a latte, grinding the coffee beans and steaming the milk. As he waited for the espresso to pour into the takeaway cup, his mobile rang where he’d left it on the table with his paperwork.
“Hello? Hey. Oh, sorry, it was on the table and I was outside with Dex. Yeah—about ten minutes probably. Er…” He glanced over his shoulder and looked through the window to the kitchen where Cam was tidying up. “Yeah, he’s still here. Why? What’s happened?” He listened for a moment, and then his eyes widened and he looked up at Dex. “Where is she now? And where’s Honey?”
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