by Marien Dore
Suddenly, something happened I couldn’t explain. My vision became blurry but not because of a need for air. The plane started to shake violently! It made my eyes widen and my stomach drop. I didn’t have any idea what was going on, but that didn’t stop what was happening. A loud creaking sound echoed throughout the plane. Holding onto the back of a seat, my eyes tried fighting through it to see where Mr. Rush was. He looked up at me instantly but didn’t stop whatever he was doing. His hand started scrambling over the floor near my seat quickly.
The shaking suddenly stopped, and my eyes found him. I didn’t know what it was he was searching for on the floor, but that didn’t hold his attention anymore.
I never saw that look on a man’s face before. He was staring past me, complete terror filling his features and disbelief. I felt a shift in the space around us and knew something bad was going to happen. Right now.
I turned my head, not wanting to see what he staring at. My heart dropped out from my chest as I looked out of the opening and broken windows. Huge gray figures swarmed the plane. And it wasn’t in a natural way. It was in a way that said they wanted to eat us.
Three? Four sharks? Did it matter because one was enough for me!? One of them hit the side of the plane, near the opening. It shook the plane hard again and made me realize that was what was making the plane shake along the rocky bottom. Mr. Rush was at my side in a second, pulling me with him towards one of the air pockets.
Pushing me up fast, he followed, and the air seemed to lessen more when our faces surfaced in the small bubble. With how hard the plane shook — as if it was going to cave in — it made the water rise up over our shoulders. The continuous banging and shaking didn’t distract him. He looked me straight in the eye, so much feeling within his gaze. “Get out of here! Go towards the front of the cockpit. The windows there are already broken. You can make it out through there!” he yelled just before the plane stopped moving. “Understand?”
“You won’t do that to me,” I said, trying hard to convince myself of that. He could not leave me. He needed to stay with me! He was hurt!
“Yes I will,” he said. The plane shook again for a second and then stopped. But each time it did, the water tilted slightly and closed in on the little air left.
“No! You’re coming up with me!” I hissed.
He took a deep breath, swallowing hard and turning his eyes away before returning them. “I’ll meet you up there. Okay?”
It wasn’t okay. Not when the plane shook again in a demanding manner. Demanding us to give up. More so, him. He was the one bleeding and attracting these sharks. That red haze doomed him! Now, he’s trying to sweet talk his way to get me to safety. Not happening.
The air around us was lessening on the ceiling, our lips getting the last of the air before it was gone. Before I knew what he was doing, he pulled me along with him, moving back down under that red tinted water. He was bleeding more than before. The sad thing was I think he only now realized how bad it was. I knew that if I went up without him, it would be the last time I see him. In the panic and rush of it all, as he pulled me along, I saw something in his free hand. It was the knife he used to cut my belt when we crashed.
I saw where he was taking me and tried to fight him. Tried to take hold of anything! I grabbed the seats, the belts, the walls and anything else! He was too strong, though. He dragged me towards an open door above first class. Trying to grasp anything, I saw the sharks hit the side again. Only as they did, I noticed the impact was so hard that the opening became wider! I wanted to faint, scream, and get the terror out of me! I thought I was going to die with him right then when that happened. A shark hit the side one more time, and that’s all it took. I saw one dart in, and I no longer tried to grasp anything. I helped Mr. Rush through the door and into the front of the plane.
One small air pocket remained above where the flight attendants worked, and we were in it fast. All I could feel in my body though was a command to get the fuck out of there! To move, scream, live!
“Janice, listen to me!” he screamed. I never heard him stutter something out so fast and in such desperation. “They can smell me and will come in through these front windows any second. If you go now, you’ll make it out. I’ll follow, now fucking go! Fight me, you will get us both killed!”
I knew this man. He would force me out if I refused him. I didn’t plan to leave him though no matter how scared I was. Our heads were all that had air surrounding us, but I felt his hands grasp my shoulders tightly. He didn’t grant me the time to think or say anything. He tried to drag me roughly towards the windows.
“No!” I ran my hands over the ceiling that was already underwater, searching for anything to grab! My hand caught a latch, and he could feel the resistance from me.
“Don’t worry about me!”
“I know you would lie if it made things right. You will die! Let’s both go right now! We can make it.”
“They will follow me. I’m… bleeding hard.”
“You saved me once, said you wouldn’t leave me. Now, it’s my turn!”
He was anxious, looking under and out the windows. His grip was gone for a minute, and it gave me the opportunity to feel what it was I was holding onto. I could feel it was some sort of latch, and it came to me what this was. Pulling it open, I felt so much relief when my fingers found a cord that I knew I could trust. I made my decision and didn’t care if he would hate me for it. One of his hands held the knife. If I could get it, my plan could work.
He looked at me hard, the air space shrinking around us. My head was ringing with fear as the plane shook again. Either from the shark in the plane towards the back or the ones outside, I did not know. It scared me more than I could describe. “This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do,” he said with pleading eyes.
I grabbed the cord that was inside the compartment. “This,” I said getting the right grip, “is the easiest thing I will ever do.” Raising myself up, I hit him in the groin with my knee. It made him drop his knife as he doubled over slightly. With a faint banging noise that echoed through the water, I knew it hit the floor of the plane. That was all I needed.
I took hold of his now empty hand and dragged him closer. I wrapped the cord around his arm several times before I pulled it myself. Before he knew what was happening, the raft was released and began to inflate. Taking my last breath, I pushed him towards the windows, the cord around his arm tightening.
When I used my hand to push the raft out towards the front windows, that’s all it took. As it inflated and rushed to find the surface, it whipped Mr. Rush out of the plane. That might be the last time I see him. He would live, and that’s what mattered.
With all the air gone, this was my last shot. Unfortunately, we hadn’t exactly planned for sharks. I had no idea what I was going to do now, and it made me want to have a panic attack. I wanted to scream and swim to the surface with all of my being. Instead, I forced myself to swim down and grab the knife he would have used on the raft if I hadn’t knocked it from him.
Looking up, I watched as the door from the cockpit to the rest of the plane floated open. Staring through the doorway with a pounding heart, I felt the fear rise. Dear god, where are they!? There were a few, and I saw none at the moment. The hungry beasts could be anywhere. Moving towards the door to look through it, I caught the movement in my side vision just in time.
The one that was on the plane darted for me. I pushed myself back through the water as fast as I could, moving as far away from the door as I could. It slammed itself with full force against the frame, trying to desperately reach me through the small space. It was only a few feet away, and I scrambled back towards where the broken windows were.
I had no idea where the other ones were. It was an awful feeling, but I had no other choice. I turned and swam, launching myself out of the plane through the broken windows. I felt wide open, like bait, and wanted to go into hysterics. They could get me any second, and I knew it. I didn’t pause. I needed to b
reathe and get away from those sharks.
I looked up and could make out the light shimmering through the surface. Kicking with all I had, I moved up and told myself just to hang on a little more. To push for my life. The closer I got, the more pressure my chest felt. I think one more second under would have claimed me. But I reached the top and sucked in the glorious air.
The wonderful air healed my burning chest and throat. Catching my breath wasn’t enough. I didn’t know where they were, where those sharks were! It was all that was ringing in my head. All I knew was that I wanted to live and see Mr. Rush alive too.
My stinging eyes found the island. It was so close, and I was in great need to be back on it. I didn’t see Mr. Rush anywhere, but I couldn’t pause. I could only hold onto hope that he was okay as I dug my arms into the water and kicked, moving towards shore. Gripping the knife with one hand, I kept moving with ridged breaths. I was about to freak out.
I hated myself. How could I do that? How could I risk his life and mine over something so stupid!? Just so I could prove something to myself and him? So I could feel I was useful and had the ability to pull my own weight? Jesus, how stupid and immature was that! We almost died! I was a dumb and insane bitch!
I still felt like available food and pushed harder and faster towards shore, the fear of them getting to me pulsing through me. It seemed like forever but eventually, my feet hit the hard and slimy rock bottom. Continuing towards the sand in a rush and looking around frantically, I saw I drifted back to the other side of the cliff, where the creek parted the land.
Moving up, my raw feet contacted the soft sand. When the water was up to my knees, I let myself collapse, finally feeling safe. Taking in harsh and greedy breaths, I closed my eyes and crawled the rest of the way up the beach. The hot sand sticking to my body, I rested my cheek against the grainy surface and felt my eyes water instantly. I laid there, taking in wheezy breaths. I willed myself to get up, but my need to let it out hit me harder.
I didn’t deserve the luxury to cry even though I have never been so scared in my life. To thrive in my own mistakes made it worse but I could not help it. I felt traumatized and was shaking. I was insane, I decided. Who does that? Who puts so much at risk over something so stupid!? There was no reason, not a good one anyway, and it might have cost Mr. Rush his life. In all the years that I would live after today, I won’t be able to forgive myself.
My mom’s multiple dead bodies flashed in my head. It added more salt around my eyes; I started crying hard. My mother, Emma, every person on that plane impacted my mind. I can’t understand how I hadn’t considered the consequences to seeing those bodies. I honestly was being stupid, blind, immature, and unreasonable. I didn’t consider Mr. Rush’s life or mine, that’s how unreasonable I had been! If we never went down there, we wouldn’t have almost gotten eaten. The only thing I was holding onto was the feeling that Mr. Rush was still alive.
I started to drift off in the midst of the exhaust, disbelief, and aftershock of fear at what today had brought, and it could be no later than noon. I rested my eyes along with my whole body, my mind going blank. I told myself I didn’t deserve rest, but I took it anyway, the sun warming and caressing my wet skin.
My eyes burned, even behind my closed lids. I was extremely uncomfortable, drenched in my own sweat instead of water. I felt the sun rays rest on my eyelids, and they allowed me to see a bright red through them. I was lying on my stomach, as I had been when I rested my soaked self on the beach. Turning my head away from where I knew the sun was shining, I cautiously opened my eyes.
Lifting my head from the tough grains, I found the line of trees ahead and the waves that rested at my feet. The sun was bright, but I noticed it was getting lower in the sky. Memories from earlier came rushing back and my chest sunk in agony and defeat. How long had it been? A couple hours at least as I eyed the sun’s position.
I sat up and groaned, my entire body sore. But really, what was knew? My watery eyes stared up towards the tree line. The wind blew slightly, moving the blades of grass in a tangle of music. Looking down at myself, I found a few cuts here and there, nothing too bad.
Taking a deep breath, not allowing myself any more tears to pass, I got to my feet. Looking up and down the beach, the creek was a little way down. I started towards it, shoving the annoying pain away. I reached it a few minutes later and leaned down, taking in the fresh water. I rinsed my eyes of the burning salt before I took a nice long drink.
Standing up, trying to decide where I could look for him, it didn’t take long. I looked back in the direction I came from towards the cliff that was sitting in the distance, barely able to see it. On the other side was where we swam out to the plane. I somehow drifted back on this side. I figured that Mr. Rush would be in this area too considering I sent him up in a raft. But he wasn’t and that scared the shit out of me. It was drawing me back to the other side.
The soreness was irrelevant. I let my feet guide me up and into the trees. Climbing the same path I took this morning, I felt like it was taking too long. That had to do with how nervous and scared I was. I needed to know he was alright. I don’t know what I would do if I couldn’t find him. How would I go on living here? Go on living period? I wouldn’t be able to. I would hate myself and not be able to handle it. I needed him.
I picked up my pace as I went uphill, needing to get back to the other side. Something told me, whether it had anything to do with him or not, that I needed to get back over there. I went slightly deeper into the woods as I rounded it. Heading downhill a different way, I became more anxious. Reaching the bottom, the grass ending and sand beginning, I stepped out onto the open sands. I looked immediately left down the beach and froze.
I saw him. In the distance, Mr. Rush sat on one of the logs laying on the beach, facing the water. He was leaning forward, body slumped forward too. His head rested buried in his hands, his entire form defeated. I walked slowly closer, squinting to get a better look. A long red line ran from the top of his shoulder down his back, curving forward and rounding his hip. He didn’t seem to acknowledge it or care, even though there was a lot of blood on the right side of his body.
I stopped there, still quite a ways away. He hadn’t moved. He just sat there, his face blocked in his hands and out of my sight. I felt my tears fall over and didn’t even realize how worried I was for him. The raft that aided him wasn’t in sight, but it served its purpose. He was alive. I was walking towards him quickly before I knew it again.
He decided at that moment to drop his hands and leave his head dangling there, staring down at the sand. He slowly turned his head in my direction, and when his foggy eyes met mine, they widened. The man’s immediate reaction was a little unexpected. He was stunned and fell back, his legs hooking over the log as he hit the sand. It could have been considered embarrassing if he was even thinking about it.
His eyes stayed on mine the whole time as he scrambled to his feet, somewhat dazed. After a few attempts, he started to walk quickly towards me too. A moment later, when he was close enough, and my heart was going nuts, I could see his eyes were wet. The sight didn’t last as he rushed to me. He had me in his arms a second later, hugging me hard to him. I hugged him tightly to me as well.
It was unexpected and the best feeling in the world. He held me to him tightly, arms winding around my back. I felt myself being lifted off the ground for a small second too. He set me down and moved his hands to grasp my shoulders firmly, his face an inch from mine.
If I wasn’t shocked then, I was now. His eyes were full of fresh tears, breath coming in and out hard. He looked so broken. So damaged and desperate, begging me for something with his painful brown eyes.
I felt my mouth drop open, grasping for words but nothing came out. I was shaking. No, he was shaking, and I was in his grasp. He looked relieved but so hurt.
He leaned in closer when he finally parted his lips. “Thank God, you’re okay.” Breathing hard too, I stared at him and his sweet expression. I was so
thankful to see him and have him here with me. A few seconds later, it dawned on him what I did. His facial expression changed, and I knew what was coming. “You’re such a stupid bitch, Janice,” he said, voice cracking. He didn’t sound mad; worked up and upset was more of what I was reading. His voice came out strained and tired. “God, you just…” He was breathing hard as he trailed off. He shook his head and looked down for a long moment. I was waiting for him to scream at me; I would have welcomed it.
When his eyes found mine again, he looked a little angrier like I expected. I needed to say something. “I—” I started trembling. “I’m not sorry for saving you. I’m sorry for everything else, though. My god, I am so sorry,” I said with a torn voice. And I truly was sorry and ashamed of myself. I was sorry for being such an immature brat towards him. I was sorry for that stupid idea. I was sorry for not thinking and putting our lives at risk.
“I thought you drowned! Or were…” He pursed his lips, unable to bring himself to speak of an alternative outcome. “How could you do that to me? You were willing to die over a few extra resources?! Are you seriously that dumb? Did you think about how I might feel about that?”
I swallowed back a lump in my throat. Staring up at his wild look, I tried to answer him. “I… don’t—” I broke off, feeling my heart suffocating. “I didn’t—”
“Christ, just shut up,” he whispered, cutting me off. Pulling his mouth down to mine, he kissed me. Kissed me in a way that threatened everything. His hands slid around me, holding me to him again. Moving his mouth over mine, he captured me, in more ways than one. His lips moved like he could never get enough of me like I was his air and this would be his last breath. His pace quickened, and I cursed myself for responding with as much want. Moving deeply with my lips, he moaned softly before pulling his sweet lips back. Staring at me even more, an inch in front of my face, he spoke softly. “Don’t you understand what you did to me?”