Definitely, Leo thought wryly, although he managed not to say so. ‘Not really. One of my patients has been rushed into hospital. He was due to have bypass surgery but he’s been putting it off for months now. There’s no way we can delay any longer, though. It needs sorting out a.s.a.p.’
‘Surely Dr Wilson can deal with him?’ Mia suggested, frowning.
Leo’s hands clenched once again as he fought to control the urge to smooth away the tiny lines puckering her brow. He had never wanted to touch a woman as much as he yearned to touch her and it was hard to accept that he was no longer in full control of himself. ‘He could, only the patient has requested that I perform the surgery. He’s one of my private patients,’ he added by way of explanation.
‘Oh, I see.’ Mia grimaced. ‘That makes a difference, doesn’t it?’
‘It does.’ He sighed as he glanced at Noah. Maybe it was a shock to find himself responding this way but he would deal with it. He didn’t have a choice. ‘I’ve no idea what I’m going to do about Noah. Normally, I’d ask my housekeeper to mind him but she’s away for the weekend. The only thing I can think of is to contact an agency and hire a nanny for the night.’
‘There’s no need to do that!’ Mia exclaimed. ‘Noah can stay here. In fact, he can have a sleepover with Harry.’
‘Are you sure?’ Leo said in surprise.
‘Of course I’m sure.’ She laughed. ‘Although I should warn you that it’s doubtful if there’ll be very much sleeping done!’
Leo laughed too. ‘If today is anything to go by then you could be right. The two of them have never stopped chattering all day long.’
‘It’s great that they get on so well, isn’t it?’ Mia glanced at the boys, who were busily engaged in building a tower out of some plastic blocks. She sighed. ‘Hopefully, it will make it that much easier when we tell them what’s happened.’
‘Let’s hope so,’ Leo agreed quietly. That Mia was as worried as he was by the thought of how the boys were going to react when they found out the truth was obvious. Reaching out, he squeezed her hand, wanting to offer whatever reassurance he could. ‘They’ll both be in the same boat and that’s bound to help.’
He removed his hand before he was tempted to let it linger. Turning to Noah, he quickly explained that he had to go to the hospital to see someone who was very sick but that Mia had invited him to stay with Harry for a sleepover. Both boys let out a huge cheer at the news, making it clear that they loved the idea. They went thundering up the stairs, leaving him and Mia alone. Leo summoned a smile.
‘That seemed to meet with everyone’s approval. You’re sure you don’t mind, though? It seems a bit rich to put on you like this.’
‘You’re not putting on me. I’m only too happy to help, especially when it means I’ll have the chance to get to know Noah a bit better. Is there anything I need to know—food he’s allergic to or hates, things like that?’
‘No, nothing. He’s not keen on cheese but apart from that he eats most things.’ He glanced at his watch and grimaced. ‘I’ll have to go. If you need me then phone. OK?’
‘Of course, but there’s no need to worry. Noah will be perfectly fine.’
‘I know he will.’ He headed out to the hall then paused. Mia had followed him and all of a sudden he couldn’t contain his feelings any longer. Bending, he brushed her cheek with his lips, feeling a rush of sensations flow through his body. It was all he could do to draw back but he had a patient waiting and he couldn’t waste any time. ‘I trust you to look after Noah not because he’s your son, Mia, but because you’re you. You’d never let anything bad happen to him.’
‘Thank you.’
Leo heard the catch in her voice and knew that his words had touched her. He opened the door, knowing that if he didn’t leave now, he might not leave at all. He drove straight to the hospital, forcing himself to concentrate on what lay ahead. It was easier that way, less stressful to think about the complexities of the surgery he was about to perform than his own feelings. Maybe a time would come when he would have to face up to how he felt but not right now. Right now he was going to save a man’s life. That took precedence over everything else.
* * *
By ten o’clock the house was quiet at last. Mia made herself a cup of tea and took it into the sitting room. Sinking down onto a chair, she sighed wearily. Harry and Noah had had the most wonderful time. She’d made a makeshift tent for them out of an old clothes airer covered with a sheet and they had played in it all evening. They’d even had their tea in there, wolfing down fish fingers and chips followed by ice cream. It had taken all her ingenuity to persuade them to vacate it for their bath but they had finally given in and spent the next hour splashing about. Now they were tucked up in bed and, hopefully, asleep.
A light knock on the front door roused her. Mia went to answer it, surprised to find Leo outside. ‘I didn’t realise you were coming back!’ she exclaimed as she let him in.
‘I wasn’t planning to but I felt like some company. I hope you don’t mind?’
‘Of course not.’ She led him into the sitting room. ‘Sit down. You look worn out.’
‘I feel it.’ He rested his head against the cushions and sighed. ‘It’s not been the best of evenings. The patient I was operating on died in Theatre.’
‘Oh, I’m so sorry. What happened?’
‘We’d not even started when he had a massive infarct. James and I did everything we could but it was no use.’ He ran his hands through his hair. ‘I keep going over it, wondering if there was something we missed.’
‘I doubt it. If you and Dr Wilson did all you could then there was nothing anyone could have done.’ She shook her head when he went to speak. ‘I mean it, Leo. You did your best and it didn’t work. You can’t go blaming yourself when it wasn’t your fault.’
‘I suppose you’re right. It’s just hard when you lose a patient like that.’
‘It must be.’ She stood up. ‘How about a cup of tea? Or something stronger? I’ve a bottle of wine if you’d like a glass.’
‘I’d love one but I’m driving.’
‘You can always leave your car here and call a cab,’ she suggested, trying not to think about the other alternative. Inviting him to spend the night on her sofa would be asking for trouble.
‘I could, couldn’t I?’ He smiled up at her. ‘All right, you’ve talked me into it. I would love a glass of wine, please.’
‘Coming right up.’
Mia hurried into the kitchen, refusing to think about what she had seen in his eyes. There was no point wondering if the same thought had occurred to him as had occurred to her. She poured them both some wine and took the glasses back to the sitting room. Leo had his eyes closed when she went in; he looked exhausted and her heart filled with tenderness. Maybe he did present a detached front to the world but there was no doubt in her mind that he genuinely cared about his patients.
‘Is that the wine?’ He opened one eye a crack and peered up at her. ‘Would you mind putting it on the table? I’m not sure if I have the energy to drink it just yet.’
‘Just try a sip,’ she said persuasively, offering him the glass. ‘It might give you the boost you need.’
‘You could be right.’ He sat up and went to take the glass from her. Mia wasn’t sure what happened but the next second the glass tipped over, showering red wine all down the front of his sweatshirt.
Leo shot to his feet. ‘What a mess! At least it didn’t go on your sofa, Mia.’
‘I don’t think there was much left after you had a soaking,’ she observed ruefully.
‘Hmm, I did seem to get most of it,’ he agreed, staring down at his sweatshirt.
‘Here, let me have it.’ She held out her hand. ‘If you let it dry, you’ll never get the stain out. I’ll pop it in the washer for you.’
‘There’s no need to go to all that trouble. It’s only a sweatshirt.’
‘It’s no trouble,’ she insisted.
Leo shrugged as he dragged it over his head and handed it to her. ‘Then thank you.’
‘No problem.’ Mia summoned a smile but it was an effort. Maybe it didn’t bother him that he was standing there naked to the waist but it most certainly bothered her.
She took the sweatshirt into the kitchen and filled the sink with cold water, deciding to wash out some of the wine before she put it into the machine. She heard footsteps behind her but didn’t look round, not sure if she could maintain her composure if she was treated to another glimpse of that broad tanned chest with its dusting of crisp black hair...
‘Is it coming out?’
Leo’s voice rumbled softly in her ear as he peered over her shoulder and Mia felt a wave of desire wash over her. She nodded, keeping her eyes on the water, which was slowly turning pink.
‘Looks like it. I’ll let it soak for a few minutes before I put it in the machine.’ She took a deep breath then turned, trying not to look at him as she picked up the wine bottle. ‘How about a top-up seeing as you never got chance to taste the first glass?’
‘If you think I can be trusted not to cause more mayhem I’d love one.’
His tone was light but she could hear the undercurrent it held and the feelings inside her intensified. Her hand was shaking as she took a clean glass off the shelf and poured some wine into it. It was harder than ever to deal with how she felt when it was obvious that Leo felt the same way, but she had to try. Maybe she did want him and maybe he wanted her too but they both knew it would be wrong to act upon their feelings. They had to think about the effect it could have on the boys when their relationship ended, as it undoubtedly would.
Mia picked up the glass and took it into the sitting room, putting it down carefully on the table. Leo had followed her and she glanced at him as she made for the door. ‘I’ll find you something to wear.’
‘Thank you.’ He stepped aside, making sure she had room to pass. He knew as well as she did how dangerous it would be if they touched one another.
Mia ran upstairs and opened one of the bags she had filled to take to the charity shop. Although Chris had been a lot smaller than Leo, there were a couple of his T-shirts that might fit him. She felt her breath catch as she imagined how Leo would look wearing them, his muscular body filling out the fabric in a way that Chris’s had never done.
Tears sprang to her eyes because it felt wrong to think such thoughts, wrong to compare the two men this way. She had loved Chris and he had loved her. He had given her so much, taught her to trust and made her see how good life could be if you had the right person to share it with. Their marriage had been a success despite the problems they had faced and she didn’t regret a minute of the time they had spent together. However, she couldn’t pretend that she had wanted Chris the way she wanted Leo.
Leo sat down on the sofa. If he hadn’t been half-naked he would have left. It would have been the sensible thing to do, far more sensible than sitting here and waiting for Mia to come back. What was the point of torturing himself? He and Mia could never be anything more than Harry’s and Noah’s parents. He understood that so why did he find it so hard to do the right thing? Was he really so weak-willed that he could no longer take charge of his actions, even for the sake of his son?
He stood up abruptly and went to the door, stopping when he saw Mia coming down the stairs. She paused when she spotted him standing in the doorway.
‘Everything all right?’
‘Fine.’ He drummed up a laugh, his heart pounding when he realised he had missed his chance. Now he would have to stay and simply pray that he didn’t make a complete hash of things. ‘I’ve managed not to spill the wine again, you’ll be pleased to hear.’
‘Good. One soaking per night is enough for anyone.’ She came the rest of the way down the stairs and showed him the T-shirts. ‘These might fit, although they’re bound to be on the snug side. Chris wasn’t as big as you.’
‘Thanks.’ Leo reluctantly took them from her. He went back into the sitting room, wondering why he hated the idea of wearing her late husband’s clothes so much. Picking up one of the T-shirts, he dragged it over his head. It was a tight fit, as she’d said, but it was better than nothing.
‘I can try to find something else if you prefer,’ she said softly.
Leo grimaced when he realised that he had made his distaste rather too obvious. ‘No, this is fine. I only need to wear it to get home after all.’
‘Well, if you’re sure?’ She left the question open and he shook his head, feeling worse when he saw the hurt in her eyes. It wasn’t her fault that he felt this way after all.
‘Quite sure.’
He picked up his glass, calling himself all kinds of unflattering names. He had never considered himself to be the male equivalent of a prima donna. Having been sent away to boarding school at a very early age, he had learned to ignore his finer feelings. However, the thought of wearing the other man’s clothes made him feel very odd. It was as though he was trying to step into his shoes: first he’d laid claim to his son; now he was wearing his clothes; and, to cap it all, he wanted his wife!
A little wine shot down the wrong way and he coughed. Mia looked at him in concern. ‘Are you all right?’
‘Uh-huh,’ Leo grunted. His lungs had gone into spasm and all he could do was grunt.
Mia hurried over and patted him on the back. ‘Try to relax, that’s it.’
She patted his back again and Leo felt all sorts of things happen inside him as his lungs started functioning again. He sucked in a much-needed breath of air, trying to ignore the fact that his pulse was racing, his heart was beating out a tattoo, whilst other bits of him were reacting in time-honoured fashion. It was as though every cell was firing out signals, telling him what to do, and all of a sudden he couldn’t hold out any longer.
Turning, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, kissed her as he had been longing to do for what seemed like an eternity. He knew it was madness, knew he would regret it, knew he shouldn’t be doing it, but it didn’t make any difference. As soon as he felt her mouth under his, he was lost.
CHAPTER TWELVE
MIA COULD HEAR the blood drumming in her ears. Leo’s mouth was so hot, so hungry as it plundered hers that there was no way she could resist. Closing her eyes, she gave herself up to the sensations that were flooding through her. It was as though every cell was on fire, burning up, consuming her, and she groaned. Desire was even more powerful than she had imagined.
He drew back at last, his grey eyes pinning her with a look that made her tremble. ‘I won’t apologise, Mia. It was what we both wanted.’
His arrogance would have annoyed her at any other time but she knew it was true. She had wanted his kiss as much as he had wanted to kiss her. She bit her lip, feeling a shiver run through her when she discovered how tender her mouth felt. Leo hadn’t held back. He had kissed her with a raw, unchecked passion and her mouth bore the evidence of it.
‘I don’t want you to apologise,’ she said quietly, stepping out of his arms. She picked up her glass, hoping the wine would help her focus on what needed to be done. Although she had wanted his kiss, she couldn’t afford to see it as the start of something more. She had to think about Harry and Noah, and how it could impact on them. They had enough to face in the coming months without her and Leo disrupting their lives any further. She also needed to think about herself. She didn’t want to end up with her heart broken when their affair had run its course.
‘We both know it was merely a matter of time before something happened,’ she said flatly. ‘However, now that it has, we can forget about it and focus on the main issue.’
‘Namely the boys.’
His tone was cool, far cool
er than hers, and Mia felt pain pierce her heart. It had been hard for her to strike the right note but Leo didn’t appear to find it nearly as difficult.
‘Exactly.’ She dredged up a smile, refusing to let him see how hurt she felt. So what if kissing her hadn’t been the mind-blowing experience for him that it had been for her? He was a lot more experienced and it was only to be expected that he could deal with his emotions better than she could do. Leo definitely wasn’t going to feel as though the bottom had dropped out of his world just because of a kiss!
‘We can’t afford to do anything that might upset them, Leo. The situation is difficult enough without the added complication of us getting involved.’
‘I agree. It will only confuse them even more and that’s the last thing we want.’
He shrugged, his broad shoulders rising and falling beneath the overly tight T-shirt. Mia looked away, not proof against the feelings that flooded through her. It would be only too easy to change her mind and tell him that they could have a relationship so long as they made sure the boys didn’t find out. Whilst she didn’t doubt that Leo would be able to handle it, could she? Could she live a double life, pretend that she and Leo were merely friends in front of the boys and be his lover the rest of the time? She didn’t think so. Desire was still so new to her that she would never be able to hide her feelings; somehow they would slip out. It was a risk she couldn’t take and not only for the sake of the children either. She didn’t want Leo to know how vulnerable she was where he was concerned.
‘Precisely.’ She shrugged. ‘I suggest we forget what happened. After all, it hasn’t been the best of evenings for you, has it?’
‘Definitely not.’ He smiled thinly. ‘Despite what my colleagues think, losing a patient does affect me.’
It was on the tip of her tongue to assure him that it wasn’t what she thought but she managed to hold back. Maybe most people viewed him as a very cold fish, but she didn’t, not after tonight. Heat flowed through her again. There had been nothing cold about the way Leo had kissed her.
The Motherhood Mix-Up Page 11