Everyone is having fun but me. Here I sit, good girl Gracie putting away books. Grace sang softly as she put the books away, her hips shimmying as she moved and bent to the lower shelves. At least I have my music and my books. More loyal friends no girl ever had.
Chapter Ten
Drake hurried into the library to return the nearly overdue copy of a history book he had borrowed to make some slides for his class. Since Grace had left his classroom he had hardened his heart, throwing himself even further into his work to keep the curvaceous brunette off his mind. Her suggestion of him teaching her about sex and about a healthy relationship had been something he contemplated for days before deciding it was wrong.
It had been wrong kissing her in his classroom and saying the things he'd said. Even weeks later he was embarrassed by the rough way he'd spoken to her. But at night, when his brain was allowed free rein and all his desires turned to dreams, Grace was there.
She was tormenting him even though he hadn't laid eyes on her since that fateful day. The scrap of paper she had left in his mailbox had been crumpled up and smoothed out so many times the number she'd hastily scrawled across the sheet was barely legible. But still, he kept it. Between pages three hundred one and three hundred two in his well-worn copy of The Scarlet Letter. It wasn't that he planned on calling the number, it was just something he needed to keep.
A little piece of what could have been, a memento, a memory. To keep his mind off the girl he knew deep down it was so very wrong to have or to want, he had begun dating a fellow teacher, Patricia Sutton. She was a willowy blonde with long legs and an eager body, something he'd taken advantage of many, many times since they had started dating, but her charms were fading fast.
Patricia had plans of marriage and a baby carriage, and was wrangling for him to meet her parents at Thanksgiving. The truth is, Patricia, you're just a notch in my headboard. I don't see a future with you, he wanted to tell her, but instead, he kept stringing her along. He knew it was a jerk move, letting the pretty woman believe there was a future between them, but he couldn't help it. She was nothing more than a vessel he could slide into and pretend she was Grace.
It unnerved him that Grace had gotten under his skin with only mere kisses. Maybe it was her offer of no strings attached and being able to teach an innocent little lamb the way the wicked frolic, but he couldn't get her off his mind. When he realized she wasn't coming back to class, it was a breath of relief but saddened him at the same time. She had cut the ties when he hadn't called. It was for the best, really. He couldn't afford to lose his position at Yale. It was something he had worked long and hard for, and his parents couldn't be more proud. But at the same time, the thought of teaching Grace the finer arts of coupling had been tempting.
She had ended up being the grown up one, putting distance between them, and it made Drake admire her even more. As he stepped into the library he took a deep breath and smiled. The scent of books was something he had always loved and he could spend hours between the shelves, unearthing a classic or two. Slipping the book into the drop box, he decided to take a few minutes to peruse the shelves. He was scheduled for a ten o'clock date with Patricia, but it was far from appealing. She wanted him to meet her best friend, some girl named Denise, or maybe it was Polly? He wasn't too sure.
Patricia's noose tightening around him made him sweat and he pulled at the collar of his shirt absentmindedly as he walked to the classics section. A soft voice singing reached his ears and his eyebrow quirked as he went in search of the singer. Down the second aisle of the classics, he found the girl he hadn't seen in weeks. She was leaned against her cart, headphones over her ears, reading a copy of none other than The Scarlet Letter.
Drake froze in place as he took in the scene in front of him. I should go, she’d never know I've been here and things could go back to the way they were...
Forcing himself away, he turned, running into the edge of a table, the clanging sound alerting Grace to his presence.
He cursed under his breath when her soft voice called for him. “Drake?”
Picking up the pace, he hurried through the library. I shouldn't do this.
“Drake, please!” she called again, her voice stronger this time.
Slowing his pace, he ran a hand through his hair and tugged at the dark locks, attempting to relieve the dull ache pulsing in his temples. He jumped when her hand brushed his arm. “Don't,” he whispered roughly, pulling his arm from her grasp.
“You were watching me.”
“So, it's a free country,” Drake ground out, stepping away slightly from her, anything to clear his mind.
“Yeah it is,” she said simply, then paused before speaking again. “You never called.”
“You made your choice when you left my classroom, Grace.” He glanced at her face for a moment, hoping his acerbic words would push her away before she got any ideas. As her face crumpled slightly, tears filling her whiskey colored eyes, his heart did a funny pitter-pat, something he wasn't too keen on feeling. “This conversation is over.” He moved closer to the doors.
“So me coming back meant nothing? You were the one who was a jerk to me. I have never done anything like this and you crushed me. I was scared. But I came back. Remember that. Go on, though, you're all grown up and you're running away. Seems like the kid isn't the one running.”
Her words hit him like a bucket of cold water and he paused by the door, leaning against it for a moment as if to take strength from the wood. “You don't know what you're asking for.” After a few moments of her not answering, Drake turned to find her gone. “I thought the kid wasn't running!”
“I'm not running, I am inside the library, doing my job. You're the one still here. Don't you have places to be, people to see?” Her head peeked out between two stacks and he couldn't stop the smile crossing his face at her pursed lips and angry expression.
“You're something else, you know that, Grace?”
“Hmm, nothing I haven't heard before. Get off the door, I have to close up the library for the night. It's technically nine-oh-one, and you're here after hours. Bye.” She waved him on with her hand and he couldn't stop the already goofy grin he sported from getting bigger.
“I'm faculty, I can stand here all night if I want to.”
Her eyes seemed to spark fire and he watched as she took a slow breath and placed her last book on a shelf. “Fine, then you can lock up. I'll be sure to let them know that Professor Stone was giving me a hard time and wouldn't let me shut the library down.”
“Would you tattle on me?” Drake crossed his arms and leaned against the doorframe.
“Isn't that what children do?” Grace quipped back.
“I thought you weren't a kid.” His pulse quickened as she walked toward him, picking up her purse from the front desk and swinging it over her shoulder. As she pushed through the door, her breast brushing his arm and her hip grazing his crotch, his heart stopped. She glanced up into his eyes for a split second and then moved past.
“I know I'm not a kid anymore. The thing is, it's something you have to figure out. When you figure it out, I'll be waiting.”
His throat went dry as she walked down the hall, her hips swaying in her snug jeans. “Dammit, wait, Grace!”
She paused for a moment and he fumbled with his key ring, searching for the library door keys. “For what?” He heard her say, and as he found the right key and slipped in the lock, the tumblers falling into place as it locked, he hurried to talk to her more. But she had disappeared.
“Shit!” he growled out, slapping his palm against the door. Damn you, Grace.
His dick throbbed behind the zipper of his trousers and he took a few slow breaths to calm the desire flooding his brain and making his thoughts fuzzy. Tearing down the hall and finding her was what his body wanted him to do, but his brain told him hundreds of reasons why it was a bad idea. Forcing himself away from the door, he walked down the hallway in the opposite direction that she had gone, his heart grow
ing heavier with each step away from the buxom bombshell.
I guess you're right, Grace. You knew you weren't a kid all along, but I was the one who needed to realize that. Now the question is, what am I going to do with that knowledge now? Is being with you even for a few moments of pleasure worth losing everything for? I spent my teenage years making my parents happy, leaving the band even though I loved it so I could be good little Drake. Now that I'm twenty-eight years old with a degree to show for it, I'm miserable. The women I meet are nothing compared to Grace. Am I saying I can see white picket fences and babies with her? No. I'm saying I could see something with her. But if we got caught? I'm fucked...
As he came to the parking lot, he blew out a slow breath in the crisp autumn air and walked to his Honda Accord, unlocking the door and sliding behind the wheel. Leaning forward he rested his forehead against the cool leather of the steering wheel.
Either way my life won't be the same. With or without her. So I guess the choice is which road I want to take...
Pushing back against the seat, he started the car and pulled out of his parking spot and drove down the street. The streetlights flashed by as he pushed the speed limit home to his apartment. Barely waiting until he put the car in park, he killed the engine and hurried out the door. Locking the car with a quick button push, he raced up the wide concrete stairs of his building and down the hall to his apartment.
He rushed to unlock the door and push into the apartment, tripping over the leg of his coffee table in his haste and the dusk of the room. With trembling fingers he grasped the well-loved copy of The Scarlet Letter and found the crumpled piece of paper inside.
Chapter Eleven
Dear Diary,
I saw him tonight. My God, he looked delicious. I wanted to give in, to run into his arms and be his, but he hurt me. He ignored me and maybe I wanted to put him in his place. It was exhilarating! I think I am going to see if Christina wants to go out somewhere so I can get my mind off him for good.
Grace
She closed her diary and slipped it beneath her pillow. Glancing over at Christina, she cleared her throat. “Hey, um, do you want to go do something?”
Christina paused in her studying, her yellow highlighter poised above the page in her book. “Oh, you are actually talking to me?”
Grace frowned. “I have been a crappy friend, huh?”
Christina shrugged. “Well, since the night at the bar, nothing has been the same.”
Grace shifted on the bed and turned to face Christina. “Yeah, I know. I have been dealing with a lot.”
“Why didn't you talk to me about it? I thought we were friends?”
“I don't know.” Grace sighed as she rubbed her forehead. “It was complicated.”
“Well, I'm here to listen now, if you want me. I’ve missed you.”
Tears welled up in Grace's eyes and she swallowed nervously before telling the story. “The night at the bar, I was kissing that guy, right?” She glanced at Christina, who nodded. “Well, I found out he was my teacher.”
Christina's blue eyes went wide. “Oh, holy crap.”
“Yeah, well, it gets worse.” Grace blew out a breath and chuckled softly.
“How could it get worse?”
Grace shifted on the bed and rubbed her eyes behind her glasses. “Well, I sort of propositioned him.”
“Oh my...propositioned him, how exactly?”
“Um...I asked him if he would teach me how to, um...do stuff.” Grace ducked her head as color rushed up her cheeks.
“I knew I shouldn't have pushed you to get out there. I'm really sorry,” Christina groaned.
“No-no! It was what I needed. I need to know what it's like to be loved by a man and have him love me in return. But it's not going to be Professor Drake Stone and after tonight I realized that.” Grace sighed. “I want to go out and forget him.”
“Wash that man right out of your hair? We can do that. Fuck him. If he can't see the gorgeous woman in front of him, then he's an idiot!” Grace found herself wrapped in a big hug.
“Thanks, Christina. I’m sorry I didn't say anything. I just kind of wrapped up in myself and pretended nothing happened. I was embarrassed that he didn't want me and embarrassed that I asked him what I did. I guess to tell the truth I was really disappointed and didn't know what to do. I've been telling my mom that everything is perfect and lying to my dad about going to church on Sundays.” As Christina released her, Grace wiped her eyes, frustrated with the moisture she felt there.
“I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know what to do to help you. I sort of thought you were embarrassed we were friends or something. I wasn't your regular type of friend.”
Grace looked up at Christina and reached out a hand to touch her arm. “No, it was never that. I kind of blamed you in a stupid way, but it was never your fault. I just needed someone to blame and you were handy. But I see now it's not you, it's not me, it's him. He's nothing but a little boy dressed up like a man. He accused me of being a kid, but I went back and told him I wasn't afraid. He was the one who was scared. I get being worried about losing your job, but we could have figured something out, if he wanted to be with me.”
“It's against the rules for a professor to sleep with a student?” Christina asked.
Grace nodded. “Yeah, it is. They can be disciplined and potentially lose their job.”
“Hmm, well, I wonder if my English professor knows that. He's offered me an A in his class if I sucked his dick.”
Grace's mouth fell open. “Oh, wow. That's not okay.”
“Nope. He's using his degree as leverage over me. Your guy is not. My teacher is a jerk, yours is a jerk but for different reasons.” Christina shrugged. “I thought about taking him up on it, though. I have a D in the class. I think he's grading me unfairly so I will do it.”
“Report him!” Grace stood and propped her hands on her hips. “That’s not what a professor should do.”
“Maybe I will.” Christina shrugged. “But it's what girls like me are used to.”
Grace hugged Christina tight. “It shouldn't be that way.”
“Not everyone gets a happily ever after, Grace, it's something you gotta realize. Let's go out. I want to get drunk.”
Grace grinned. “Let's do it.”
Half an hour later they were walking into X2C, the bar where everything had started. Grace wore her red dress again, and Christina had even pulled out her little black dress from the depths of her closet. The bar was decorated for Halloween, music pulsed through the air and orange strobe lights lit the walls. A faint trail of fog ran through the tables, adding to the theme.
“We need to find some guys to get us drinks!” Christina yelled over her shoulder and Grace stuck her thumbs up to let her know she heard her through the din.
Grace let out a breath and glanced around. Being left alone in the bar felt like a déjà vu moment from a time before and her heart beat hard in her chest. It's not like the last time. He's not here. There will be nothing with him...
A guy sidled up to her and threw his arm over her shoulders, causing her to stagger under his weight.
“Hey there, tits. How you doin'?”
Grace shrugged off his arm and stepped away. “Really? How rude of you to just come up to a girl and call her tits.”
The boy leered, then took a long draught of his amber beer. “Well, babe, you're the one with them stuck out there in that skin tight dress. If that's not begging for me to look at them, I dunno what is. Are they real? Can I feel your tits, tits?”
Grace's eyes flew wide and her mouth dropped open. “Did your mother drop you on your head as a baby?”
The guy nodded with a big grin. “She sure did. Right into her tits.”
Grace was saved from responding by Christina, who walked back to her side. “Is this jerk bothering you?” Christina asked.
“Yeah, he's being a rude jerk.”
“I was just telling your friend that her tits are fantastic and I w
ant to motor boat them.”
Christina snorted. “Really? Well there, sailor, how about you get me and her a drink and we'll discuss you seeing her tits later? How about that?”
Grace squawked in protest. “I don't think so!”
Christina leaned closer and whispered, “Use your magnificent melon balls to your advantage. I had no luck getting us drinks.”
Grace wrinkled her nose and whispered back, “But he's gross!”
“And he is of age. He can get us drinks, then we'll lose him.”
Grace sighed and turned back to the lecherous drunk. “Tell you what, sailor,” she started, mimicking the way Christina had talked to him, “get us both a drink and we'll see.”
“Whoa! Hell yes! I'm down. Could I get a two-fer?” He waggled his brows.
“Maybe!” Christina offered as she pointed at the bar. “Two Screaming Orgasms!”
The guy shuffled off to the bar, his beer sloshing out of his glass as he went.
“Eww!” Grace groaned. “I feel dirty.”
Christina shrugged and fluffed her hair. “It's no big deal. Let's just get a drink and go dance or something.”
Grace kept glancing around the bar, a tiny part of her hoping the man she wanted most would show up. She realized it was a futile hope, but the desire still coursed through her. He had looked phenomenal all mussed from a long day of teaching.
“What are you thinking about?” Christina's voice broke through her fantasy.
“Huh?”
“You're all pink and biting your lip. You're thinking about Professor Hottie, aren't you?”
Grace coughed nervously and shifted. “No, I'm not.”
“You're a terrible liar. Look, here comes drunk dude with our drinks.”
“Think he drugged us?”
“Nah, I have been watching him. We'll drink a few sips, then excuse ourselves to the bathroom, okay?” Christina whispered quickly.
“Oh, okay.”
“Mmm, two Screaming Orgasms for two hot babes. I can't wait to sink my man meat all up in your roast beef sandwiches, maybe make a little cheddar sauce.”
Saving Grace (Wild Rose Book 1) Page 8