* *** *
I could not stop thinking about the kisses. All through Friday, I was smiling like an idiot, recalling the sweet gestures. It was only when I got home and realized that I had to get ready for Archangel that I lost my grin. I had wanted to talk to Mykail when I got home, but breakfast had been awkward enough, since I could not communicate to him with my parents seated next to me.
I purposely pressed myself to the wall to avoid being seen as a slinked into my room to get ready for Archangel. I was still distracted as I got dressed. I continued to try on different things I had in my closet, not sure what kind of image I wanted to put forth that night at the club. When I started getting frustrated at not knowing what to wear, I started to panic about unrelated things.
I thought about Dana, about Clark, about us trying to take him down, the Commish Kids always watching me…
It was very real. I had to be very careful.
I settled on a simple black dress and boots, deciding that it was the classiest look I had in my clubbing clothes. I had spent so much time trying to pick an outfit that I only had ten minutes to do my hair and makeup before Becca and the others would be by to pick me up.
I hastily put product in my hair and painted my face, getting frustrated by the imperfections I could not cover up.
Finally, my phone buzzed, telling me that the others were outside.
I grabbed my purse, hastily finishing with my lip gloss before scurrying out of my room. A voice stopped me at the top of the stairs.
“Lily,” Mykail called. I hesitated, feeling my blush rise as I walked to him. He was standing by the bars, looking at me with his beautiful, concerned eyes. “Are you alright?”
I nodded, unable to form words.
“Are you going to Archangel?” I nodded again. “Are you going to talk to Clark?”
“Hopefully he’ll have some news,” I said, still feeling the heat in my cheeks as my heart knocking against my ribs.
“Okay,” he breathed. He reached forward and placed his hand against the side of my face, causing my breath to halt in my throat as I stared at him longingly. “Be careful.”
My legs turned to jelly, but I barely managed to stay standing. I smiled as I bit my lower lip and took a few deep breaths through my nose. I peeked up at him and then leaned forward. He leaned closer as well, the bars hitting my cheeks and cooling them as our lips touched.
He smiled when I pulled away shyly.
“I’m relieved.”
“Why?”
“I was worried that you didn’t like me in the same way I liked you,” he said, embarrassed. My heart melted.
“I really do,” I assured.
“Even though I’m…” His wings ruffled and I smiled broader, nodding. “It’s dangerous, you know.”
“I do,” I agreed. “But why not take a risk? We’re taking several already.”
Mykail smiled and took my hand, squeezing it.
“Thank you,” he breathed. He squeezed my hand once more. “You should go.”
“Will you be awake when I get back?”
He nodded.
I skipped out to the car, trying not to appear too happy so as not to raise suspicion.
The car ride to the club was full of meaningless chatter that girls often have when in a group. Part of me was happy for the silly talk. Most of the time, while I had been trying to adapt to how my life had changed since entering the Commission, I had not had the will to participate in conversations with my friends. Now, I had a goal. I wanted to take down Dana. The club was the other half of my life—I was living a double life.
When I got to the club, something bizarre happened.
Clark was already there, and he was desperately waiting to talk to me. I was approaching the area where we would normally meet up when he walked over and grabbed my hand.
“We need to talk,” he said urgently.
Fear filled every fiber of my being.
He pulled me away while everyone stared after us, concerned.
Clark led me to the dance floor, creating a path through the dancing students to the stage. He ducked behind one of the cylindrical platforms, finding a clear space for us to stand, before he turned to me quickly.
“What?” I snapped, frightened.
“Have you said anything to anyone about this?” he hissed sharply.
“Of course not.”
“Are you sure?”
“Clark, what the hell? You’re scaring me.”
“Yeah, well, I’m pretty fucking scared, too,” he said, his eyes wide. He cast an eye around us and I did the same. Clark reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper.
“I’ve been asking around,” he started, still looking around the room, avoiding my eyes. “Nothing direct, just feeling around with some people who I know have had some doubts before. Everyone is too nervous after the announcement Dana made last week to say anything. However, at the same time, more people seem to be hesitant about saying they support Dana completely. It might be a while before I can really ask them anything.”
“Okay.”
“Yesterday, when I was at the Commission,” he started, “I was studying and Dana came into the room. He told me that he’s thinking of recalling some of the gift experiments.”
“What?!”
“He asked for my opinion on it, and I told him that it would upset a lot of people and that, with his announcement last week, recalling experiments is going to raise a lot of doubt and the result really could be bad,” he said. “But he just told me that he thought I would say that and then walked out.” He leaned close. “Have you broken any of the rules that Dana gave you for Mykail?”
“No.”
“Then why would he say that?”
“I don’t know,” I hissed. “Who’s to say it has anything to do with us? Maybe something else happened.”
“I asked my mom, but she says that there hasn’t been any talk of rogue or unruly gift experiments,” Clark shook his head. He glanced at the paper in his hand. “Then…I found this in my backpack today, with my bookmark for An Angel Without Wings.” He handed the paper over and I took it with shaking hands.
It was several small pieces of paper folded together. I unfolded them carefully and looked over the first page. The letters were extremely difficult to read in the sloppy handwriting and I really had to focus to figure out what was on the first page.
W1- R9-335159
W2-R3-773951
W3-R1-872508
W4-R7-008523
W5-R5-162896
W6-R2-588892
W7-R6-414400
W8-R8-619372
W9-R4-700023
W10-R10-411410
WE-M.o.N. – ***8000-9133-375-2953-21-8-8324
After I looked over the mess of numbers and letters on the paper, I glanced at Clark.
“Does this make sense to you?”
“No.” He shook his head. “The only thing I can think of is that the double-u numbers are the different wards in the Enterprise lab,” Clark shrugged. “Otherwise, I have no idea what this could all mean. There’s more,” he nodded to the other pages. I flipped to the next page and blinked at more confusing numbers and letters, accompanying symbols, very basic and primitive, appearing like a math problem.
“This is ridiculous. What the hell is this?” I growled, frustrated.
“I told you, I don’t know,” Clark said sharply. “The other three pages are more of the same nonsense, continued in the same penmanship with different numbers.”
I glanced over the other pages and saw the strange code continue in a terrifying way. I sighed and shook my head, not making sense of the symbols.
“Look at the last page,” Clark hissed, his voice tight.
I nervously flipped to the final page. What I saw scribbled messily on the page made my eyes go wide and my heart stop.
There are more who can help. Just be careful and we will help you through this.
Memorize this and burn it.
“See what I mean?” he snapped. “What the hell is this?”
“I…I…” I could not find any words to explain what I was looking at. I blinked stupidly at the papers.
“Are you sure you have not broken any of Dana’s rules or told anyone?” Clark pressed.
“Of course I haven’t.” I shook my head. “If I had, don’t you think that these would have ended up in my possession first?”
Clark bit his lip, troubled. I shared the sentiment. There was something terrifying about the new development. Part of me believed that this was a good thing, and that this information really would help us take down the Commission, and that there were people to help us, but I did not know how to start making sense of the equations or if I could trust the note.
“Do you recognize the handwriting?” I asked.
“No,” Clark said, rubbing his face with one hand. “Somehow someone who has access to my things put it there for a reason. Someone knows what we’re doing.”
My heart leapt into my throat.
“Well, you don’t think anyone would put this there to help us only to stab us in the back by going to someone else and explaining what we’re doing, do you?” I mused, looking over the papers. Clark shook his head.
“The notes aren’t much help if we can’t figure them out,” he groaned. “I’m worried that they might be trying to plant information on us so that Dana will catch on to what we’re doing.”
I shivered at the thought and looked around quickly before turning to him, folding the papers to shove in my boot.
“I will take them to Mykail. Maybe he can make sense of them.”
Clark hesitated, but finally nodded. He looked around and sighed heavily.
“As for everyone else…” he started slowly. He shook his head and averted his eyes to the ground. “I think we need to wait a week or two. Maybe by the end of October we can have an idea of people we can approach.”
I nodded, trusting his judgment.
“Clark,” I started before hesitating, not sure I should ask my question.
“What?”
I took a deep breath.
“What should I do?” I finally managed to say. “In order to get Dana’s attention…to get closer to him? Do I act like the others in the Commission and fawn over him?”
Clark looked pensive for a moment and then slowly opened his mouth to speak, his eyes cast down.
“No…” he said. He scratched the back of his neck nervously. “You want to get his attention? Fight him.”
“Fight him?”
“Fight,” Clark repeated. “Ignore him, make him come to you, play his game. Every time he looks at you, glare at him and look away. When he tries to call you over, don’t go. When he speaks to you, pretend not to listen. That’s when he tries harder to bring you closer.”
“That seems…”
“Play him,” Clark said. “You’re a woman, you can do that more easily than I can. Only show interest when he talks about the experiments.”
“You mean ignore him in all other ways so that he latches on to the one piece of attention I give him?” I pressed. I took a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I think that’s a lot easier said than done when it comes to Dana…”
“Probably,” Clark admitted. “But your spirit is what is already drawing him closer. I’m not sure you’ll have to try too hard. He already wants you.”
I lowered my head, feeling my stomach turn sickly inside of me. I was unsure what would happen if I tried to get close to Dana and it got out of hand. I hardly knew the leader of the Commission well enough to figure out when I was getting too close. But I had to take the risk. I had to try and bring down the Commission before I was so wrapped up in it that I could not find the will to fight back.
“We should go,” Clark said, peeking out from behind the cylindrical stage. I nodded and followed him through the crowd, starting for the stairs before I stopped.
“Clark, I’ll be right up,” I said quickly, turning around and walking back to my other friends. Clark looked like he wanted to protest, but he nodded and ascended the balcony stairs while I made my way through the crowd. For some reason, everything seemed more crowded tonight and my head was already spinning from the strange notes.
Suddenly, a cold feeling swept over me and I felt the familiar rise of hair on the back of my neck.
I turned quickly and, even with the pulsing lights and dancing students, I saw the face that frightened me so horribly, my legs started to give out. I blinked, and the face was gone.
That frightened me even more.
I was glancing around frantically, trying to spot him again, when I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder.
I whirled around with a yelp, which caused Jill to jump back, also startled.
“Easy now, it’s just me,” she chuckled, though I could tell she was worried. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah, I just…” I turned to look into the crowd but could not spot Dana’s face again. I turned back to her and smiled. “Sorry. I was distracted.”
“You and Clark just ran off,” she said, taking my hand and leading me to their table. “What was that all about? Is everything okay?”
“Yeah.” I forced myself to smile. “Just some stupid drama for the Commission.”
“Oh…” She knew better than to ask about anything in the Commission. “Well, come hang out with us for a bit. Devon misses you.”
There was ice in her voice. Feeling bolder than usual, I pulled her back, turning her to me.
“Look, Jill,” I said. “I know you like Devon.”
“What? I don’t—”
“No, hear me out,” I interrupted. “I know you like him. And I want you to know that we just danced those few times. I don’t have any interest in him like that.”
She stared at me for a few moments before laughing, acting as if the confession had nothing to do with her. She shook her head.
“I don’t care if you like him,” she told me. “I mean, who can blame you?”
“Jill…”
“You really don’t like him?” Jill asked, her eyebrows high. “Or…do you like someone else?” A big smile spread across her face and, before I knew it, I could feel myself blushing, thinking about Mykail and his warm kiss. Jill’s face lit up. I couldn’t tell if she was happy because I was interested in someone or if she was happy because that person was not the same one she was interested in.
“You do!” she gasped, once again enthusiastically leading me to the table. “Who is it? Someone we know?”
“No,” I shook my head. “I mean, I don’t like anyone!” I groaned to myself, realizing that I had just become the topic of gossip for the night.
We reached the table and the others turned to me.
“Hey, everything alright?” Devon asked.
“Yeah,” I assured. “Sorry if we worried you.”
“Can you stay down here and hang with the not-so-cool kids?” Taylor asked with a teasing smile.
I sighed.
“I’d love to, but I do need to go upstairs pretty soon,” I said sadly. “I just wanted to come over and say hello. I really miss hanging out with you guys.”
“We miss you, too,” Becca grinned, hugging me with one arm.
For a few minutes, I was able to sit with my friends and chat with them. I declined dancing, just because I did not want too much activity. We talked about things we heard around the school and, though I found none of it interesting, it was good to be around people who were not part of the Commission, people who did not see me someone who was a favorite of Dana Christenson, people who did not know about the horrific acts that occurred inside the Commission.
However, I could not avoid the balcony forever. I saw many Commish Kids dancing, doing their rounds in the crowd, and every time I saw them, I felt the pinch of the folded papers in my boot.
I bid goodnight to my friends, agreeing to go to Becca’s house on Sunday, and walked to the balcony.<
br />
As I was reaching the top of the stairs, I was blocked by Brian, Freddie, and Will, glaring daggers at me as I looked at my feet, fear curling in my belly.
“What the hell did you tell Mr. Christenson?”
“I didn’t tell him anything,” I defended, trying to move past them, keeping my head low. Will reached out an arm to stop me from actually getting on the balcony.
“Really?” Freddie growled. “Because let me tell you about the things he did to us.”
“I really don’t care,” I snarled, once again trying to push past them.
“You should,” Brian snapped. “You told him everything and not only us, but even our parents are really getting the blame for what happened.”
“I didn’t need to tell him anything,” I reminded them, mustering up my courage to glare. “He was there.”
“What is it about you that he likes so much?” Will asked, his eyes sharp. “You really must be something if he so willing to protect you like that.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
They looked me over and I could feel their eyes trail over my skin. I growled and tried once again to push past Will. When he did not move, I growled and punched him—admittedly not very hard—in the stomach, causing him to recoil enough to allow me onto the balcony.
I quickly found Clark.
“Are you alright?” he asked when he saw me angrily approaching.
“I really hate some of the kids here,” I huffed, sitting opposite of him and crossing my arms over my chest.
“Preaching to the choir.”
For some reason, the night dragged on and it seemed like I had been in the club for days before the announcement came that the buses were leaving. Clark and I had not really spoken to one another. Every now and then we would share glances that showed how worried we were about our new plans to overthrow the Commission and the strange notes we had received. But otherwise, we did not communicate.
When the club lights came on and everyone had left, the meeting for the Commish Kids started.
Clark conducted the meeting. I zoned out through most of it, my mind full of too many different things. I was working myself up pretty intensely when the topic finally arose.
Inside, Pt. 1 Page 26