‘Don’t want to. I understand.’ Dolly took a deep breath. ‘I think you need to tell him about the pregnancy.’
‘How on earth would that help?’
‘He’s talking to Mum about how he and Vanessa should have the house. Since she’s got kids already and they need the space.’
Luce blinked. ‘But it’s my house. Grandad left it to me. And besides, they’ve been together—what?—three months? And they’re already talking about shacking up in my home with her kids?’ Luce could hear her voice getting higher and squeakier as she talked, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself.
‘Okay, you need to calm down. Think of the baby.’
Luce rolled her eyes, but settled back obediently against the cushions. ‘As if I think about anything else.’ Except the baby’s father.
‘Look, I don’t know if he’s just testing the waters, or what. But Mum’s so happy to see him settled with someone that I think she’ll go for anything that keeps him that way.’
‘But it’s my house,’ Luce repeated, calmer this time.
‘I know. But you’ve always given in to them before. To me, too.’
‘You make it sound like I’m a doormat.’
‘It’s not that. It’s just that you’re always working so damn hard to make sure we’re all happy and okay.’
‘And that’s a bad thing?’
‘Not in itself, no. But Mum and Tom...they expect it now. They can’t imagine it any other way.’
Everything Ben had ever said about giving in to her family, about giving up her life for them, came back in a rush. He was right. He’d been right all along. This was her life, and she needed to live it for herself. And she’d have someone else even more important to live it for when the baby came. She’d have her own little family to be responsible for. She couldn’t let her mother and brother run her life any more.
‘You honestly think they expect me to give up the house?’
Dolly shrugged. ‘Mum and Tom both treat this place like it’s theirs anyway, when it’s convenient.’
‘Not when the roof almost caved in or the stairs needed replacing.’ Funny how they’d been nowhere to be seen when she’d needed money or time to help fix the place up.
‘Exactly.’
‘Exactly...what?’
‘They have no idea what they’d be taking on. But Tom’s so used to you doing whatever he needs I don’t think it’s crossed his mind that you won’t just happily move out into some little flat somewhere while he moves his instant family in here.’
‘That’s crazy!’
‘Luce...’ Dolly put her cup and saucer back on the tray, and leant forwards. ‘You’ve never said no to him before. No one has—except Hattie, and look what happened then.’
‘So you’re saying I should give him my house to avoid his mental breakdown?’
‘Hell, no!’ Dolly shook her head violently, her long dark hair flying across her face. ‘I’m saying it’s time you did say no. Unless you want to get the hell out of this crumbling museum before the baby comes. In which case, make him buy it from you.’
Luce looked around her at the antique furniture, the threadbare rugs and the splintering floorboards. Yes, the place was falling apart. But it was her home—would be her baby’s home. It was all she had left of her grandfather. He’d left it to her, not to Tom or Dolly or their mother, and he’d done that for a reason.
No way in hell she was parting with it.
‘No. It’s my home. I’m staying.’
‘Fine. Then we need to make that clear to Tom. And then we need to go and buy some yellow paint for the nursery.’
Dolly clapped her hands together with excitement. Luce wasn’t sure whether it was the painting or the standing up to Tom that was filling her with glee. It didn’t matter.
‘There’s something else I need to do first,’ she said. ‘I need to tell Ben.’
* * *
Ben was wrestling with the hotel key card when his phone rang. As the door fell open he dropped his suitcase and put the phone to his ear.
‘How did it go?’ Seb asked.
Ben kicked the door shut behind him. ‘It went well, I think.’ Meetings with investors were usually Seb’s domain, but he’d insisted Ben take this one. It was his baby, after all.
‘Good. Full debrief when I get there tomorrow? I got Sandra to book us a meeting room.’
‘Sure. Just need to get some sleep first.’
Seb laughed. ‘Welcome to the world of real work, brother.’
The cell was cut off as Seb hung up, and Ben tossed the phone onto the coffee table. There was truth in Seb’s words. This was real work—trying to expand and transform a hotel chain that had been stuck in one mindset for too long. It was work Ben would never have been allowed to do while their father was alive—work he hadn’t even known he wanted to do until Seb had suggested it to him.
But now? He was good at this. Better than he’d used to be. Because he cared about making these hotels right for their guests. Not just the businessmen or the couples. He wanted a chain of boutique hotels that felt like a home away from home for the families that stayed in them. That made the kids feel safe and happy—not scared of another sterile white room with a too-big bed. Not a free-for-all family hotel with everything in red plastic either, though. This was a hotel for grown-ups, too. It just didn’t exclude or alienate children.
He had a plan, and he had convinced the backers, but he had a hell of a lot of work ahead of him.
But first he needed to sleep.
The phone rang again before he could make it to the bedroom. He intended to ignore it until he saw the name flashing across the screen.
Luce.
Snatching the phone up, he said, ‘Hey, I was going to ring you. I just got back into the country and I’m in Cardiff for a few days.’ He didn’t mention that he’d scheduled this particular leg of the trip in the hope of getting to see her.
‘That’s lucky,’ she said, her voice warm and familiar. ‘I really need to talk to you.’
‘Okay. Want to do it over the phone? Or meet me for lunch tomorrow?’
‘Um...neither. Look, could I come over? Where are you staying?’
Ben felt ready to drop. His eyes itched with grit and his very bones ached with tiredness. But the thought of Luce in his arms again... ‘Of course. I’d love to see you.’
There was a sigh of relief at the other end and Ben felt the first pang of concern at the sound. What did she want to talk about, anyway? He had hoped whatever it was was an excuse—just a reason to see him. He’d have to wait and see, he thought as he rattled off the hotel’s details for Luce. She’d be here soon enough, and he really needed to shower first.
He barely made it. The knock on the door came as he towelled off his hair. Pulling a tee shirt over his head, he padded barefoot to the door in the comfiest jeans he’d packed and hoped Luce wouldn’t be too disappointed if he wasn’t up to hours of bedtime fun tonight.
When he opened the door he stopped worrying about that and started worrying about her instead. Her hair was scraped back from her face and he could clearly see the redness around her eyes, the puffiness of her skin.
‘Are you okay? You look dreadful.’ He ushered her in, keeping an arm around her shoulders as he guided her to the sofa.
Luce gave a watery chuckle. ‘Just what every girl likes to hear.’
‘Sorry. But...what’s happened?’
‘God—everything.’ She sighed. ‘Um...my brother Tom.’
‘The one you rushed back to cook a dinner for?’ Ben tried to keep the censure from his voice. He wasn’t sure he was entirely successful, though.
‘Yeah, that was... I shouldn’t have. I know that now.’
Ben blinked at the unexpected victory. Except if she’d changed her mind that thoroughly... ‘What did he do?’
‘He wants my house.’
‘What?’
Luce rubbed at her eyes. ‘He and his new partner want to move in together, wi
th her two kids, and Tom thinks it’s only fair that they get the family house, since there’s more of them.’
‘That’s crazy. It’s your home.’
‘That’s what I’m going to tell him. And...’
She trailed off, and Ben felt fear clutch at his insides. What else had her brother done? ‘Go on. Tell me.’
Luce looked up at him, holding his gaze with her own. Her eyes still looked tired and watery, but they were clear as she said, ‘I need to tell him I’m pregnant. But I couldn’t do that until I’d told you. That’s why I wanted to see you tonight.’
‘You need to tell him... Wait—what?’ The world seemed to have gone fuzzy. Luce’s voice was buzzing in his ear, making it impossible to make out the words. ‘But... What?’
‘I’m pregnant.’ The words cut through the haze of confusion, clear as a bell, but still Ben couldn’t make sense of them.
‘Pregnant?’ he repeated numbly.
‘Yeah. I know we used protection, but that first time...’
‘I was too desperate for you.’ Stumbling to his feet, Ben moved to lean against the back of the sofa, hands braced against the edge, staring down at the cream leather. ‘God, this is just...’
‘I know it’s not what either of us planned,’ Luce said from behind him.
She sounded brave, calm—but then, she’d had more time to figure all this out, hadn’t she? How long had she known? Long enough to make a twenty-five-point plan for dealing with it, he was sure. Whereas here he was, half-asleep and dead on his feet, trying to get his mind around the idea that in seven months he would be a father.
God, how could he be? When he’d just promised Seb he’d take on the whole new business? He couldn’t drag Luce and a baby from hotel to hotel with him, like his father had. He’d lose them in a heartbeat. And Luce would never trail around after him while he worked anyway. She had her own career, and her own family tying her to Cardiff. He wasn’t foolish enough to think she’d give those up for a man she barely knew and had spent just a few days with, even if she was mad at her brother right now.
So what did that leave?
Luce touched him on the shoulder and he flinched in surprise, spinning round to see her watching him with wide eyes. ‘Look, I know this is a surprise—’
‘Surprise?’ Ben shook his head. ‘It’s a shock. A disaster.’
Her face hardened at that, and he wanted to take it back, but it was the truth, after all. What was he going to do?
‘Okay. Fine. I just wanted you to know so you could decide what involvement you want in your child’s life. Obviously the answer to that is clear. So I’ll just—’
‘Wait. No. I just... I need a little time here, Luce.’
She nodded. ‘That’s understandable. Why don’t I meet you for lunch, later in the week, and we can talk? Come up with a plan?’
‘No! I don’t want you to go. And I don’t want to come up with a plan! This is our whole lives being turned upside down. A “To Do” list isn’t going to fix that.’
‘It’s a start.’
‘It’s an end. It’s giving up on any other options.’
Her face turned stony. ‘Options?’
Ben stared at her, his eyes widening when he realised what she thought he meant. ‘Not that. No, never that. I just... I don’t know how we could make this work right now. The business... There’s a lot going on right now, and Seb needs me to do it...’
Luce took a step back, her mouth twisted in a cruel smile. ‘So now your work matters to you? Right.’
‘There’s a new project,’ Ben started, but it sounded weak even to his own ears.
How could he explain to her again, in a way she’d understand, that he couldn’t be the man his father had been? He couldn’t lose her and his child that way, have them hating him for never being there. But he still had too much to do. He couldn’t give up his dreams for a life in an office, nine to five, never going anywhere or seeing anything. Where would they even live? A never-ending series of hotel rooms would be terrible for a child, despite the new project, and by all accounts her house was falling apart. They didn’t even have a home—how could they be a family?
‘I just need some time, Luce.’
She shook her head. ‘No. You’ve made your priorities very clear, thanks. I can do this on my own. I have my family to help me.’
‘Would that be the same family that’s trying to take your home away from you? And how the hell are you going to look after a baby in that place anyway?’
‘What? You think we’d be better off here?’
She glanced around her and Ben knew she was taking in the sharp corners and sterile white and metal furnishings. Nothing like the cottage at all.
‘I think you’d be better off with me.’
‘Living out of hotel rooms? Never settling down? Isn’t that what you said you’d never do to a child?’ The words stung as she bit them out. ‘Or will it be you, gone for months on end, sleeping with every woman who smiles at you in a hotel bar? No, thanks. A family takes more than a one-night rule, Ben.’
He swallowed back an angry denial, not least because he knew everything she said was true. His father hadn’t been able to do it, and Seb wasn’t even trying, for all his talk. Ben wasn’t content to be one of those once-a-month visiting dads. So maybe Luce was right. Maybe there was no place for him at all.
‘I can help. Financially.’
She threw him a scathing look. ‘I don’t want it,’ she said.
Ben heard, I don’t want you.
‘Money isn’t going to give you a quick fix this time.’
Why was he even surprised? he wondered as Luce walked out, slamming the door behind her. He’d never expected his father to love him more than his work, or his mother to love him more than her freedom. He certainly couldn’t expect Luce to love him more than her child.
Their child.
‘Hell,’ he whispered, and went to pour himself a very large whisky from the mini-bar.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
LUCE REFUSED TO CRY.
She stayed resolutely dry-eyed while flagging down a taxi. She remained calm as they drove through the dark Cardiff streets and as she paid the driver. She didn’t even give in while she fumbled with the keys to get into her house.
But at the sight of Dolly, asleep on her sofa with a blanket over her knees, having obviously failed in waiting up for her to get home, Luce fell apart and sobbed.
Dolly awoke with a start, jerking upright and tossing back the blanket even as she stumbled to her feet. ‘What happened?’ she asked, her voice bleary.
Luce shook her head and pulled Dolly down to sit on the sofa with her. ‘I can’t... Just...don’t ask, please.’
‘Idiot,’ Dolly whispered. ‘Tell me he wasn’t more of an idiot than Tom?’
‘It’s a toss-up.’
‘Useless. All of them. We should run away to some women’s commune and raise her there.’
‘It might be a boy.’
‘Doesn’t matter. We’ll dress him in skirts.’ Dolly shook her head. ‘Except then Tom would just steal the house while we were gone, and that’s no good. So we’ll stay here.’
‘We?’ Luce blinked up at her sister
Dolly took a deep breath. ‘I thought I could move in and help you. If you want me. And not at all in a house-stealing sibling way. Because you already have one of those. I know I haven’t always been much help in the past, but I think it might be time for me to grow up and take care of myself.’
Luce tilted her head to look at her sister. ‘You have grown up. I don’t know what changed.’
Dolly shook her head. ‘Doesn’t matter. The only thing that does is that I want to be here to help you with the baby. To look after you for a change.’
‘That would be wonderful.’ Relief started to seep into her chest. She didn’t have to do this alone. Even if Ben wasn’t there she still had Dolly.
‘And besides, I thought the rent money might help you with doing this place up a
bit. Making it safe for the baby.’
Luce stared at her. ‘You don’t have to pay rent. You’re still my baby sister.’
‘And I’m a grown-up now, remember? I can pay my own way.’ Dolly smiled a lopsided smile. ‘Maybe we can help look after each other. Because it seems to me that there’s going to be someone soon who needs your love and care a lot more than me or Tom or Mum.’
‘Especially if I’m the only parent it’s got.’ Luce slumped back against the arm of the sofa.
‘Idiot,’ Dolly muttered again. ‘But it doesn’t matter. You’ll be the best mum any child could hope for. And I’ll be the coolest auntie.’
‘Of course.’
There was a pause, then Dolly asked, ‘What did he say?’
‘He’s got a lot of work on at the moment. He offered me money.’ That was a reasonable summary, Luce felt.
‘How dare he!’ Dolly’s voice grew ever more vehement.
‘The thing is, he’s not a bad man. He...he looked shell-shocked at the whole thing. Trapped. Like he couldn’t see a way out.’
Dolly shook her head. ‘Doesn’t matter. He should have manned up and supported you.’
‘Yeah, I know.’ Luce twisted her hands in the blanket. He should have. Of course he should. And she couldn’t quite believe that he hadn’t.
‘But...?’
Luce looked up at her sister. ‘The thing is, I think I might be a little bit in love with him.’
Dolly laughed and pulled her into a hug, her arms warm and comforting around her. ‘Oh, Luce. Of course you are. I’ve known that for weeks.’
‘Then how come I only just figured it out?’
‘Because you were too busy trying to come up with a sensible plan for all this. Except love isn’t sensible, and it can’t be planned.’
‘Is that why you fall in love so often? Because you’re not sensible and can’t be planned either?’
‘Exactly.’
How had her baby sister grown up so smart? Luce laid her head against Dolly’s shoulder and stared out into the darkened room. She knew where every stick of furniture was, exactly where each painting hung on the wall. They’d been there her whole life, after all. ‘What do I do now, Doll?’
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