by Davi Cao
Colin jumped there to help, touching her heavy suit with strength. He wanted to feel her skin, and although so close to him, she remained too far. He looked through her glass helmet and saw the face he so wanted to admire again. Angeline, there, more than he could ever hope her to be, the exact same person, no doubt of it. After all, it came from his mind, his materialized wish. Fake or real, her presence meant everything.
“I am here for you! Are you hurt?” Colin asked her.
She spoke without sound, her eyes opened wide, her mouth babbling nonstop, her pupils fixed on a point behind Colin’s head. She looked at OOOO, who watched their reunion in a state of complete marvel, not realizing the impact of its presence. Angeline folded her stiff arms around Colin’s waist, doing her best to hug him. He responded to her caress with moistened eyes, embracing her rigid suit with all his heart.
The house trembled again, taking Angeline along. She started to shake in unstoppable convulsions, staring at Colin while she screamed without sound and knocked her arms and legs around with violence. Her glass helmet melted down, exposing her delicate skin to the hostile world, and she suffered in Colin’s arms. He wished for a live Angeline, he wished for the end of that world, and it didn’t materialize. She melted down in agony, and the puddle of her flesh spread on Colin’s empty room.
He stood up and shook himself to get rid of small chunks of her melted body, frantically pushing hands against his waist and legs. Rattling his wrists like a maniac, he walked in circles in the room, looking at the walls.
OOOO took him in its legs and led him out, despite his resistance. Outside, Colin got down and tried to get back inside to mourn on Angeline’s mortal remains. The house lost its argument, though, and melted down, burying her in a mound of slime.
Time can’t heal those who don’t sleep and are never tired. Even so, Colin walked in a straight line, with an automaton’s blindness, looking for anything capable of releasing him from his disgust. The World Voice’s pillar wandered far and its voice spoke fair to him, he who dwelt indeed in a hell of a world and he who had nobody to talk to at a human level. OOOO herded him away from the pillar, getting in front just enough to make him change course.
“The Voice has the void,” Colin said.
“It does, doesn’t it?” OOOO said.
“Is it a companionship in this world? Would it be possible for the Voice to realize that the void is the friend it wants so much?”
“The void could be a friend in some worlds, yes, but not in this one, you see?”
“We are the silly ones. When everything melts, we become one, full of friends, even with nothingness.”
“Haha, not with sad atoms, you see? The one thing they don’t want is friendship.”
“There are no shortcuts in here then. It’s either melting down or living in permanent frustration.”
“A good challenge, isn’t it? I’m proud of it.”
“What if I try again?” Colin stepped on the base of a steep hill.
“I’d love to see how it goes!” OOOO spun its head while muttering its words.
Talking offered the healing Colin wanted to get from time. Angeline’s distorted face messed with his head, but if nothing else happened in his world, those visions would never fade. Thus, he stopped and crafted four walls and a ceiling around them. He made a window to let light come in, and covered the melted floor with the same material he had been using in his latest experiments. He wished for air at just the right pressure. The room filled in with an atmosphere of its own, a mixture of gas that exploded when in contact with the walls.
The air would renew itself from a central spot in a constant pace, according to Colin’s idea. He then thought about a cockroach and it materialized. The insect ran on the floor and climbed up until it touched the ceiling, falling down in the shape of melted chitin. Colin wished for thicker walls, and he increased the air renewal’s speed. He created a mouse and watched as it moved around with curiosity, stopping at every corner to investigate a possible escape.
OOOO approached the little creature and put one of its cylindrical legs in front of it to see if the mouse would climb on it. It struggled to get up, and when it reached OOOO’s layers of tissue at its chest, the animal jumped down and ran the opposite way, scratching the wall in an effort to reach the window. Happy with his creation's fate, Colin introduced a cat in the room to see nature being itself.
“I am lost forever ... Nobody will ever find me ... I can’t do anything in here ... I’m so miserable, so alone ...”
The great pillar approached. OOOO crafted a pressure-free door in Colin’s room and fled, pulling him along. They left together, running away from the danger he knew so well, but not before enclosing his prototype with another layer of therapeutic matter. The cat and the mouse stayed alone in the storm, while OOOO hopped fast with Colin on its lap.
After the tempest, they got back to the room and entered through newly crafted passages. The cat had survived, crawling out of balance, although still alive. The mouse disappeared, a pile of fleshy stuff on a corner the likely outcome of its body. Melted or disemboweled, one couldn't tell at a glance.
“You can try again with your beloved ones now, can’t you?” OOOO said.
“I’m afraid. We can’t be sure of the harm done to the cat. What if its mind is altered?” Colin said.
“Make an even more reinforced shelter, and build it underground, why not? That’s extra protection.”
Colin’s eyes glistened with the idea. This time, Angeline wouldn’t need a space suit.
∙ 16 ∙ Underground
Hiding underground proved useless against the World Voice. Its great pillar penetrated down to the dead planet's core like a hot knife cutting through butter. The Voice weighted upon every atom, echoing its distressing calls through the whole universe. Different materials, dotted with resilient personalities, yes, psychiatrist walls, they received the burden of sadness well, their depth making little difference.
Colin’s current underground shelter had five layers of such walls, some with vacuum in their gaps, some filled with the completely dejected matter from OOOO’s fountain, remade just for this purpose. The inner rooms formed a small town with a few streets and cubicles for houses and buildings. A vast warehouse sheltered all these constructions, squarish, long, heavy columns supporting its ceiling, the black sky.
Entirely in the dark, Colin managed to create a power source and turn it into light and heat. Supposedly a nuclear reactor, he had no idea of the workings of such a construction and couldn’t hope to recreate a precise one at that, but he wished for power and he got it, no matter how magic or absurd his contraption was. A river of crystalline water flowed in the middle of the major street, coming from a spring that had no explanation other than spontaneous apparition. He wished for it, and it materialized in place.
Aware of the differences from the Terra of his dreams, Colin settled for cheap and lazy solutions that didn't live up to his expectations. The ecosystem created a limited balance, insufficient and ugly. In part, he regretted falling for that idea. If he didn't attempt it, though, he would have to spend all his time looking for Mae in a vast, dead world.
“You’re stressing too much, aren’t you? You could well create humans that don’t need any water or light. You have this power, you see?” OOOO said.
“If I do that, they won’t be humans anymore. They have to need what they’ve always needed,” Colin said.
“You can make that too, can’t you?”
“It’s not about them, don’t you understand? It’s about me! I need them to be what they were. Otherwise they won’t be the same, and I’ll get as much satisfaction from them as I get from you Creators.”
“Which must be a big satisfaction, right?” OOOO stared at him with a proud smile.
“Not yet. I need to show them that I can be an interesting person too.”
“You are one, aren’t you? Go on and show them!”
“I will. And I must ask you, OOOO, t
o please let me alone in here. They will freak out if they see you. I’ll visit you up there when everything is alright, ok?”
“What a pity ... I can’t even stay hidden somewhere, can I? No?”
“Sorry. Go back to your world and create your things. I’ll tell you how it goes.”
OOOO left by a hidden passage that cut through all layers of protection and led to the upper world. Colin checked the underground city in the search for cracks, leaks, and melting. The cats he had created ran through the streets and climbed on trees, benches, and even lampposts. Life followed its path in that world for the first time without fear or sadness. The sky loomed above, a dark ceiling, his world a big box, and he felt as if he was inside a bunker. He called a cat and his voice echoed endlessly. The city's atmosphere allowed the next step.
In his chosen house, he took the fragments of his parents' photo from his pocket. Little remained from his reconstruction, but it sufficed. He knew very well what he wanted. They were Francisco and Sarah Zanetti, his father and mother. He imagined them and wished for their existence.
They showed up in his room, sitting on the couch. They read on their cell phones, a day like any other, resting at peace. Colin's clock struck nine, their relaxation time.
Before going to them, holding his excitement, he imagined his work crew and Angeline, and he wished for them. They materialized in another part of the city, where they would live from that moment on. He waited to meet them the next day, when he'd go to the office and see everybody again.
“Aren’t you tired of standing up like that?” his father Francis asked.
“Yeah, sit down here with us. You’re not growing any more than that,” his mother Sarah said.
“I’m not tired. I spend the whole day in front of a computer. I need to stand up more,” Colin said.
“OK, but it’s weird to see you there like a statue. Is everything alright?” Sarah said.
“It’s getting better. I ... I’m thinking of—”
“You know what, I’m not alright.” Francis put a hand on his forehead, looking at his wife. “I feel terrible. It’s so warm today, don’t you feel it? My head hurts a bit. What do you think it could be?”
“Why, how can I know? Is it just a headache? Did you work too hard today, did you eat well?” Sarah said.
“It was a normal day. But I don’t feel well. I’m sad, and it’s weird.”
Sarah stared at Colin, smiling at his contracted face. She stood up and went to the living room’s cupboard, positioned in a different place from their original Terran house, and yet she knew the exact spot where to look for medicine. She took two pills and then filled a glass of water in the kitchen next door. She sat down again and they both took the medicine.
“I’m not so well either. What a strange day, isn’t it? Maybe it’s the weather. I don’t like it when it’s warm like this. We feel like doing nothing all day, right?” Sarah said.
“Yes, is it sleeping time already? Oh, so soon ...”
“Mom, dad. You just need some rest. You guys are great, ok?” Colin said.
They returned his compliment with gentle nods, unsure of what else to do. Their family avoided explicit displays of love, much less coming from their son. Both stared at him with a thankful smile, opening up a space on the couch, patting its fabric with wide palms.
Colin watched as his parents slept early, complaining about the lack of signal for their cell phones. Their gadgets got stuck on an internet page and couldn’t move on. In a world without radio waves or fiber optics, Colin created a random content generator to fulfill their media. Magic, once again.
He regretted having created night, because he lay down on his bed and couldn’t sleep. Staring at the ceiling, he saw it trembling at many spots, tiny earthquakes. Paying attention, he heard faint whispers hitting his mind, hypnotizing him:
“... Alone ... this terrible world ... somebody, anybody, please ... worthless, the worst of all ...”
The night struggled to pass. Colin looked through his window, down to the street where Angeline resided. They lived so close to each other, and the world slept in such deep a silence, that a thought tempted him: to go there and talk to her. He craved for human drama, for worries of mortal people. If he did that, though, he wouldn’t be the Colin that existed in old Terra.
Morning came with breakfast created by him on the kitchen table. Without farmland, without industries, without any complex ecosystem, all food depended either on spontaneous creation or on his deliberate will.
He pretended to eat alone, expecting his parents, who used to leave their bedroom early, and didn't do so that day. Worried, he checked on them and saw that they lay awake under their sheets.
“We won’t go to work today, son. Life’s too short for that.”
“Yeah, what’s the point? We deserve one day off. Why don’t you stay with us?” Sarah said.
“No, I want to go. Mr. Alden’s got new projects these days, and I have to help him. But you should get up and do something. You’ll only get lazy if you stay there like this.”
“We’re enjoying life a little bit more, don’t preach at us. Get to work then, go make your boss richer.”
“Sarah!”
Under the sheets, lazy, rested his parents, those who birthed him, Colin felt it in his heart. That thought gave him confidence to leave for work. Despite his fear of finding the World Voice leaking into his town, he would take care of them later, when he got back home.
Opening the door to the office, all his old work mates greeted him with their usual silent nods. He put his backpack under his table, sat at his computer and turned it on. Jason, two chairs next to him, frowned at the screen, clicking nervously with his mouse. Without an actual internet database, Colin had to craft a very limited global network based on the people created and their interests and browsing habits. People came into existence already adapted to this, but they still found conflicts with some inconsistencies.
Not finding any new tasks in his projects system, he went to Mr. Alden’s room. Never had he gone there with so much joy as on that time, not scared of unemployment nor shame. His boss' words would reach his ears with the charm of true bliss, his greed for human contact excited to the point of absolute happiness. The man ate a bar of chocolate while reading an online newspaper.
“Good morning, Mr. Alden.”
“Morning, my boy”
“There’s nothing on my system today. Was it erased by accident?”
“Forget about the past. We have this thing here now, come take a look, or better, just take it with you and start working on it,” he said, giving Colin a pile of papers. “This is our life now, so make sure we can make it on time.”
“Thanks, I’ll do my best, sir.”
He gave Colin a major signage project for the whole town, financed by Mr. Alden himself. Colin read each briefing paper with amazement, surprised to see new content independent of his will. He created a world and that world now had a life of its own, adjusting to its own needs according to basic principles. Fascinating as it was, it also meant hard work. The demands would put the team under strain.
The door opened and Angeline entered the room, late as usual, always running. She smiled at Colin, but she drew her eyebrows together, embarrassed. Sitting down by the computer at his side, she stared at her screen, waiting for the machine’s initialization in silence, stiff and contracted. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye and tried to break the ice.
“I couldn’t find a bus today. Had to walk, sorry,” she said.
“It’s OK, don’t worry. It’s good that you came,” Colin said.
“Thanks. Is everything fine with you? Your face is different.”
“Is it? What is wrong?” He touched his forehead, looking at his finger.
“Nothing, you just seem ... happier than usual. What, aren’t you going to tell me the good news?” She nudged him with her elbow.
Colin laughed, “You’re seeing too much. It’s a beautiful day, that’
s it.”
“Beautiful? My God, it’s so ugly out there! I’m telling you, Colin, you have a way of looking at stuff that nobody understands.”
Her joyful smile melted his heart. An immortal, at last, reaping the rewards of creation, reacting to a dialogue that ran out of his control. Angeline, alive and well, restored to her marvelous self. Jason, behind her, shook his head at their small talk, and the colleagues behind the other computer screens gave no signs of life.
“What have we got for today? Mr. Alden told us yesterday we had something grand. I’m not in the mood for working much, I admit, so take it easy on me, please,” Angeline said.
“It’s a big job, you’re right. I’m still reading it, though. Do you want to help me? If you’re not busy with something else, of course,” Colin said.
“Nah, the internet is strange today. Nothing interesting, and I’m quite sick of it. Of everything, to be honest. I’d better spend my time talking to others, otherwise I’ll just head back home and ask for a leave. Let’s see what we have here, I’ll help. It’s design stuff, isn’t it? I can help.”
“Yes, apparently we have to make signs for the whole town. Buildings are still unidentified, and it’s funny, I never even noticed that!”
At the end of their first project pass, Angeline herself got scared by the amount of work. She would have to do extra hours every day, for sure, and leave her personal projects once more on standby at home.
Colin spread out all their duties, he divided them between all designers, he even calculated the costs of freelancers with the budget available. The solution came as overwork. A restaurant worker knocked at their door with lunch. They ate in front of their computers, some watching videos, some listening to music.