by Linda West
It all came flooding back to Dodie.
Wow.
So the man she’d been writing to, spending ages curled up in her bed trying to think of the right words that would bring him comfort and strength in the face of so much atrocity, was him.
The man she had shared her own grief with and loss of hope with.
Jason.
The man she had dared let close to her through their writings because he was safe. Away. Not real.
But he was real.
He was real and he was here.
Dodie dared a quick look in his direction.
Jason, the stranger who’d waltzed into the bakery and made her heart jump. It was hard to wrap her head around.
She only realized she was staring at him when he looked in their direction and she jumped clean out of her skin. She looked away at anything, at her hands, at the wall, at the decorations.
She heard Carol giggle, very softly at first, then a little louder.
“I think you should tell her, Carol,” Ethel said in a warning tone.
“Tell me what?” Dodie asked, careful not to turn around.
Carol beckoned her so she could whisper, and then leaned forward toward her ear. “That’s who we figured could buy your cake at auction. He loves chocolate, you know.”
Dodie’s heart skipped a beat, and then sped up into a cadence so wild she could barely catch her breath. “Wow.”
Carol nodded. “Uh huh. Now I’ve gotta go get these girlies sorted out. You’ll come over once you’ve got your piping done, won’t you, Dodie?”
“Sure, sure,” Dodie said, still reeling. “Sure I will.”
Carol winked at her and shuffled away with Ethel in tow, leaving Dodie alone to try and not look up. She felt so vulnerable when she looked into his eyes, as if he could see her naked soul, naked body, naked everything. The way her heart flooded with warm affection scared the heck out of her!
She rooted into the basket Ethel had carried in, where she’d packed the piping equipment and the jar of raspberry coulis. Dodie had spent ages boiling it down to just the right thickness that morning and after doing a test on a cupcake she was assured of its consistency.
After pouring it into the piping sleeve she took a deep breath and began to squeeze. She tried to remember the swirling pattern and apply it to the blank canvas of perfect chocolate sponge, but her hand shook and the pattern jutted out at odd angles. “Oh, goodness.”
Eventually she managed a steady hand and sunk into a deep concentration, completing one side. It wasn’t as good as the example in the book but it was good enough.
“Hi,” a deep voice said.
It startled her so much she dropped the piping sleeve right on top of the cake, ruining the whole pattern and smudging coolie all over her hand. She looked up, stunned. “Jason.”
“I’m so sorry,” he said, attempting to pick the piping sleeve up out of the mess. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“It’s okay.” She stared at him, forgetting the cake altogether.
He smiled and she thought her knees might give in. “Hey, how do you know my name?”
Somehow she managed to find her voice, though it sounded like it was coming from someplace far away and blood thundered through her ears. “Carol told me.” She so badly wanted to tell him that she was the one who’d sent him so many letters, but the words caught in her throat.
“Is that a chocolate cake?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“My all-time favorite.”
They didn’t break eye contact, even for a second.
“Yes.”
He stood, admiring it, like he wanted to take a bite right then.
She felt like she was going to bust. Here she was acting as if they were strangers when they knew each other’s deepest hopes and dreams. Knew each other better then she had ever known her ex fiancé even.
Safe Jason, her pen pal who was far away and never able to hurt the real her. Safe. She had thought he was a safe place to put her feelings because he wasn’t really there. She couldn’t let herself be hurt again by feeling anything real. He had been her safety net and now he wasn’t safe at all. With those mysterious grey eyes and joyous grin he was far to real and far to able to hurt her. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything. Suddenly, Summer appeared looking every bit her super model self.
Her long surfer blonde tresses fell about her beautiful face framing it perfectly. “Hey Dodie, mom was wondering if you had any extra vanilla she could borrow?”
Dodie was torn from her thoughts and started absently looking through one of the supply bags. She pulled out a bottle of vanilla and looked confused. “This looks to be an extra…”
Summer smiled at Jason.
“Hey Jason have you met Dodie yet? She’s new in town. Earl’s her uncle she’s been living up at the lodge and working with mom and Aunt Carol at the new shop.”
Jason was taken aback.
“Dodie…?”
Summer squeezed her tight like a best friend, “We adore her and were never letting her leave!”
Dodie smiled back at her and produced a small bottle of vanilla, “Flattery will get you everywhere.”
Summer laughed back her way as she hurried off to meet her mom, “Oh won’t it though!”
Jason and Dodie were alone now.
He looked deeply into her cat-like green eyes. Dodie looked away hoping he couldn’t see how much she was drawn to him. He was her friend. She didn’t need to complicate his life with feelings for him. Besides he was probably only home on leave for a while and then he would be gone. Not real again. For all she knew he had a girlfriend here in Kissing Bridge.
“Jason…I’m Dodie. You know, the letters… I was the one writing to you,” she blurted out, “when… when you were away.”
He glanced up at her, unresponsive for a moment. Then his eyes widened in shock and he drew his hand up to his pocket. “Dodie?” he whispered. He looked like he’d seen a ghost.
“Yes,” she said, concern flooding her. “Is everything okay?”
“Wow, I can’t believe it.” He broke into the most joyful smile she’d ever seen. “Wow! Dodie, that’s you?”
“Uh huh,” she said, smiling right back.
“Oh my goodness.” He sprung up on his toes, grinning from ear to ear. “Wow. Oh my goodness.”
He instinctively reached out to hug her, but a squeal called their attention away from the moment.
“Dodie!” an urgent voice called from across the room.
Dodie glanced back to see Carina crestfallen and near tears.
A baking disaster must have ensued. She placed the piping sleeve down on the table. “Jason, I’m sorry, I’ve really got to go help her…”
She looked torn. The last place she wanted to leave was where she stood right now, next to him.
“No problem,” he said, “We’ll talk soon.” And with that he walked away.
Chapter 16
“Oh no,” Carol said, crossing her arms, her eyes darting nervously across the surface of Dodie’s ruined cake. “It’s a mess.”
Ethel nodded in agreement. She glanced up at Dodie, who was across the hall attempting to attend to some cookie-related emergency, Carina and Stephanie and Tassy and all the other girls huddled around her. “It’s such a shame,” she said. “The sponge layers were so so good.”
Carol slotted her hands into her waist and pursed her lips as she surveyed the cake once again. “This just won’t do,” she said, shaking her head.
After a moment or two of forlorn staring, both Ethel and Carol looked up at each other.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Ethel asked.
“The spare!” Carol said.
Whenever there was any kind of baking event, any discerning, reality-conscious baker would carry a spare!
It was just like a spare tire for the car. From time to time, it could be expected that something would go wrong or a baked good would fail for whatever reason, so Ethel k
ept a spare in her trusty basket, ready to be switched with the offending cake or cookies in record time.
It was always an apple pie, because, as Aunt Carol always said, “Who the heck doesn’t like apple pie?”
Ethel scrambled under the table to find the basket while Aunt Carol packed the mess of a cake back in its white box. “Oh goodness,” she said on closer inspection. “Poor Dodie. All that hard work.”
“No matter,” Ethel said, producing the perfect apple pie and placing it on the table. “She’s sure to win Jason’s heart with this one.”
“Perfect,” Aunt Carol said. “But what will we tell her?”
“I’m not sure,” said Ethel. “I don’t want to hurt her feelings. But I don’t want to lie either.”
After a few moments, Aunt Carol stuck her finger in the air, “Aha!” but didn’t say anymore.
“What is it?” Ethel said, humoring her.
“Let’s tell her that we found out Jason likes pies better than cakes.”
“But it’s not true.”
Aunt Carol twisted her mouth. “You just wait there.”
She marched over to where Summer and Brad were standing drinking hot cocoa and looking all googly eyed at each other. Jason leant against a table, gazing at the group across the hall.
“Hey Jason,” Aunt Carol said. “Do you like cakes or pies better?”
“Huh?”
“Just answer the question, son.”
He thought for a moment. “Well, pies, I guess.
With a loud confirming ‘Hummf!” Aunt Carol strode away with her massive red beehive bobbing along as she went.
Jason looked confused. He had yet to realize the power of Aunt Carol when she was on a mission.
Summer laughed and warned him.
“Watch out! It appears Aunt Carol has you in her sights! I see lots of pies in your future Jason. Pecan pies, blueberry pies, apple pies…”
Brad wrapped his arms around Summer and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “No apples for my big bro honey. Jason’s allergic to them.”
Chapter 17
Carina screwed up her face in disgust as she bit into the cookie, tears welling in her eyes. “It’s horrible, just horrible!”
Dodie took a tiny bite and it took all her strength not to spit it right out. It had a horrible sour, salty taste.
“What is that?”
“I don’t know,” said Carina.
“Mine are fine,” Stephanie said. “Which is weird because we used exactly the same recipe. I even left out the vanilla and I worried about it but they still came out good.” She put her arm around Carina. “Why don’t you have mine?”
“No, no,” Carina said. “You baked your cookies especially for Tom and arranged them just the way you know he’d like them. I don’t want to ruin that.”
Dodie’s heart was in her mouth. Once Stephanie had mentioned the vanilla she knew what her own mistake had been. That’s why she had the extra one in her bag. “I am… Carina, I am so sorry.”
“What?”
All the girls looked up at her with concern and she felt like sinking into the ground and never coming back out again. But she had to own her truth. She’d promised herself that much when she arrived here, that she’d say how she felt, admit her mistakes and stride out into creating a new life, no matter how hard it was. Admitting her mistakes was probably the hardest one.
“I…” She took a deep breath. “I think I poured out the wrong thing.”
“Huh?” Carina looked up at her with her wet eyelashes and Dodie felt a surge of guilt.
“That wasn’t vanilla essence you put in your cookies. It was soy sauce.”
The girls gasped.
“And it was all my fault,” she added.
She looked down at her feet, wondering how the heck she’d done it again. She’d already ruined a brownie experiment by pouring out the wrong black liquid into the batter. Aunt Carol had purchased the soy sauce for a citrus, brown sugar, soy sauce cake, which had come out a whole lot better than it sounded and had flown off the shelves, and had decanted it into the same type of robust plastic bottle that held the vanilla essence. Dodie’s confidence drained out of her. How was she ever going to fix this?
A tiny, tinkling laugh made her look up. She saw a smile spread over Carina’s face as her shoulders shook and she giggled. Soon the other girls joined in and they were all laughing.
“Yum, soy sauce cookies,” Tassy said, licking her lips. “I’m sure Oliver will just love those.”
Carina burst out into new peals of laughter. “How about tomato ketchup cookies, anyone?”
“Mustard cookies,” Stephanie suggested.
Addison threw her hands up in the air. “Or good old plain salt cookies.”
“It’s a classic!” Carina said.
“Mmmm, I know,” said Justine, her whole face lighting up as if she were talking about the most delicious sweet treats in the world. “How about salt cupcakes with mayonnaise icing.”
They all laughed.
“Can we stop talking about this now?” Stephanie asked, still laughing. “It’s making me want to hurl.”
Carina glanced over at Dodie, then touched her arm. “Seriously, don’t look so guilty. It’s fine. I don’t mind. He might not have liked them in any case.”
“No, no,” said Dodie. “I made this mess, I’m going to fix it.” She looked at the clock. “Let’s run back to the bakery and whip up another batch. I think we just about have enough time.”
“I can’t run in this dress,” said Carina, but two minutes later they were out the door, wiggling their way back to the bakery in their tight dresses.
“I am so sorry,” Dodie kept saying.
*******************
Once back in the bakery, they tore into the back room. Dodie chucked Carina an apron and slipped one on herself, deciding that a dusting of white flour was probably not the best accessory for her vibrant red dress.
“Simple choc chip is okay?” Dodie asked, fumbling through the cupboards for ingredients.
Carina nodded. She headed over to the oven and turned the switch to the right heat.
“Let’s do this.”
Dodie had never baked so quickly or fluently in her life. They mixed everything up in lightning quick time but it was torture to wait for the oven to get hot enough to slide the cookie sheet in and get it baking.
“Thanks so much for helping me,” said Carina.
Dodie hugged her. “It was me who messed up in the first place. I should be thanking you for forgiving me.”
“I sure hope Oliver likes regular chocolate chip, but then who doesn’t?”
“These are gonna be hot out of the oven,” Dodie said. “By the time the auction’s over they’ll still be warm. No one else in this auction can lay claim to that!”
Carina smiled. “I guess you’re right!”
There was no time to leave them to cool once they were done, so Dodie handed Carina a cooling rack and a spatula and picked up the oven mitts for herself.
They looked quite a sight hurrying down the street in their dressy auction clothes, Dodie with two oven mitts and a hot sheet full of cookies, Carina holding a spatula in one hand, the cooling rack in the other.
People were arriving in full force by this time, nodding at them and giggling a little at their expense.
“I just hope we get there in time,” Dodie said. “I think by the time we get in there you could transfer them to the cooling rack.”
“No problem,” Carina replied.
They managed to weave their way through the crowd in the parking lot and lobby, pushing through to the function hall. Dodie laid the cookie sheet down on the table and chanced to touch it. It was just warm, perfectly comfortable to touch. She nodded at Carina, who began scooping up the cookies with the spatula.
Dodie glanced up at the clock.
It was nearly auction time.
The hall was heaving by now, so much so that she couldn’t even get a glimpse of Jason as
she looked around. She decided the best thing to do was to return to her place before all the bakers were sent out. Her eyes scanned all the auction stalls and tables, but she couldn’t see her cake anywhere. She was so sure she’d left it next to the Boston cream pie Ethel had made hoping to lure Earl, but there was now an apple pie in its place?”
She hurried over, her brow creased. “Hi, Ethel, do you know where my cake is?”
Ethel looked uncomfortable and was about to open her mouth when Carol appeared. “We found that Jason prefers pies to cakes, so we made a substitution.”
Dodie felt like all the wind had been knocked out of her sails.
“Oh.” She couldn’t find any more words than that. Maybe Jason did prefer pies, but if she won his date with something she didn’t even make, it wasn’t real. It was false representation. It almost felt like manipulation. But there, feeling tiny in the massive crowd, still feeling the burn of shame for substituting soy sauce for vanilla, in the presence of two seasoned bakers, she couldn’t find a voice. “Okay,” she said.
Dodie realized she felt relieved in an odd way as well. So Jason wouldn’t pick her baked good and they wouldn’t be paired as if by fate. She wasn’t sure she could look him in the eyes on a full date anyway. He would see straight through her. To her feelings. She visibly shook now. She should have thought about this more. She wasn’t ready for love or anything near love. She certainly wasn’t ready for more disappointment and rejection. She wished she could just run away from the auction and that handsome man who knew her very soul, and never look back.
Instead, she took her place behind the table and the crowd blurred over as tears formed a film over her eyes.
Snap out of it, she told herself. You’re being ridiculous. She wiped her eyes furiously and pushed her chin up. Everything was going to be all right, she told herself. But she didn’t quite believe it.
Just then, Justine crossed in front of them, proudly carrying her apple and cinnamon cake, grinning at them.
It was like it happened in slow motion.
Dodie saw every detail as Justine’s high heeled shoe got caught in the hem of her dress and sent her flying, the cake dropping to the floor as quickly as she did. Justine lifted herself up, but couldn’t do anything for the cake, which had splattered across the floor in pieces. She looked up at them in shock.