by Alisa Adams
They arrived at a house full of children, the occasional puppy, a baby, and numerous bemused adults. The Douglas children were fascinated by David, who was the original bouncing baby boy as happy as a child with everything could be. He had a pair of loving parents, doting grandparents, and all the material possessions he could wish for. He had Bettina’s big green eyes and Nevin’s chiseled features. Nevin called him his ‘warrior’ and could not wait to begin training him to use a sword.
“Do you not think he should learn to walk first, Nevin?” Bettina asked, laughing. “Wait until he is weaned!”
“I am thinking ahead, my dove,” he replied, laughing. “He will be a Laird in his own right some day and he may have to defend Kilmunnock against some fearsome enemies. I have an idea the English are not done with us yet!”
Munro cast Nevin a warning glance. This kind of talk was not fitting for Christmas. He smiled at Bettina. Bettina shuddered, but Munro smiled. “Should the worst ever happen, Bettie, no doubt Nevin’s forefathers built dozens of ingenious defenses and escapes from this castle. If you ever have to use them again, I have no doubt you will be fine.”
Bettina looked up into Nevin’s gray-blue eyes that she loved so much. She could not imagine life without him. So many people had lost spouses and parents in the last year or so that she lived in terror of losing her Nevin and her David.
“Do not worry, my dove,” he whispered. “As long as I live you will come to no harm.”
Suddenly something occurred to Bettina and she smiled. “Did you ever call Allana your dove?”
Nevin looked at her in disbelief. “Allana? A dove?” He laughed. “No, Allana is more like a raven, handsome and clever with black shiny feathers.”
“I am sure she will be glad to hear it!” She laughed. “Look, here is Leann!” She went over and kissed her friend. “It is so good to see you, my dear! Come and join the fray!”
“A fray?” She gave a peal of laughter. “Oh, I do love a good fray!”
Leann’s laughter hid a well of pain. She was the only one of the guests who came alone. She loved her house and spent most of her time decorating it, but she could think of nothing else but the dissolution of her marriage. There had been no word from the authorities about Kendrick’s trial, so she was in limbo, neither married or unmarried.
She was extremely flattered and surprised when the son of a gentleman farmer paid her particular attention during a ceilidh one evening. However, when he heard about her marital situation, he quickly distanced himself from her. She had not entertained much hope; there were plenty of richer, prettier ladies than she out there without any complications in their lives.
She had no particular charms, after all, she told herself. She had no looks, no figure, and she had been trained for no occupation. All she knew how to do was be a wife—she had even failed at being a mother. She saw no future for herself except a lonely spinsterhood. Sadly, Leann did not realize that she shone because of her sharp wit, obvious intelligence, and self-respect. If she pitied herself sometimes, no-one else knew about it. She held herself proudly and showed the world a good face. She was looking forward to New Year with Allana; their friendship had been the one good and true thing to come out of her and Kendrick’s disastrous marriage.
New Year could not have been more unlike Christmas in the Ingram household. Every single neighbor, friend, friend of a friend, and relative from distant places like the Outer Hebrides had turned up to welcome in the New Year. There were perhaps a hundred people there that night. The moon was in its first quarter, lying on its back, and there was magic in the air—everyone could feel it. It was as if they were all waiting for something, and no-one could tell what it was.
Presently, the church bells rang in the New Year, the music coming from all directions. Allana, in her heightened emotional state, likened it to angels singing. As she circled among her guests, she could not stop smiling.
The guests were all wishing each other a happy New Year when it happened. All of a sudden, there was a shower of sparks that shot across the sky and fell to Earth, shimmering and twinkling. It was like a sign and everyone suddenly felt blessed and crossed themselves. There were good things coming and in that moment, when their eyes rose to the sky, no-one dared move—except one.
Allana’s baby moved. She gave a sudden sharp gasp as she felt something like a tiny little tap inside her then a few more in quick succession. She looked for Gavin. The pregnancy was now about three months old and it was not unusual for mothers to feel the first movement of the baby shortly after that.
The first person to notice her was Leann, who threaded her way through the crowd to get to her friend. “Are you feeling alright, Allie?” she asked.
Allana nodded. “Fine, thank you,” she whispered.
“When were you going to tell us?” Leann’s eyes were twinkling.
“This evening, when everyone had stopped drinking in the New Year.”
“Allow me.” Leann stood up, grabbed both their hands, and then clapped her hands for attention. She shouted, “Ladies and gentlemen, the Laird and Lady Ingram would like to thank you all for coming tonight!” Then she bowed and made way for Gavin and Allana.
Gavin smiled and raised a glass. “Thank you all for coming! A happy New year to all of you!” There were a few cheers and much clinking of glasses, then they waited for a speech. “We have an announcement to make!” He looked down fondly at his wife, then raised his glass of wine. “In the summer, my wonderful Allana and I will be welcoming another little Ingram!”
Then the men roared and patted Gavin on the back while the women squealed and besieged Allana. Amid the cheers and laughter, Bettina hugged her sister as if she would never let her go. When she did, there were tears in her eyes. “You will be a good mother. I knew from the first time I saw Gavin that you were destined to be together!”
“I am so glad one of us did, Bettie!” Allana said before she was claimed by her well-wishers again. Bettina watched her sister as she threaded her way through the crowd. All the men she had been associated with had been so different, but perhaps she responded better to an older and more mature hand. She had never seen Allana so settled.
Leann had been about to go upstairs and climb into bed. She was very tired and not really in the mood for small-talking with strangers. She decided to finish her wine and disappear. Just as she was about to stand up, however, Laird Douglas came and sat down beside her. He smiled.
“Do you believe the shooting stars were a portent, Leann?” he asked quizzically.
She laughed. “No,” she replied. “Neither do I believe in the Loch Ness monster or the Man in the Moon.”
“Call me Munro,” he invited. “Sadly, we have something – or someone – in common. How is the dissolution of your marriage progressing?”
She sighed. “I have heard nothing, but perhaps these things take time.” She smiled bravely. “How are you? I heard that you brought your children with you.”
“Yes, but you will only meet them in the morning,” he replied. “As for me, I am coping.” He smiled at her.
He is a good man, she thought. If only I had never married Kendrick!
On the last day in January Allana received a letter from Leann. It read:
My Dear Allana,
I have two pieces of news to tell you. My marriage was dissolved on the twentieth of January and Kendrick is dead. I received word from the gaol that he contracted an infection, probably from a rat bite, and died of natural causes. I do not wish to know the details. He had made confession and had the Last Rites, so he was buried in consecrated ground and for that I am grateful. I stopped hating him a long time ago.
I hope you are healthy, and that all is well with Gavin and the baby,
Much love,
Your friend, Leann
Allana mulled over the words for a long time. Had she stopped hating Kendrick? Suddenly, she realized that she had. Without even realizing it, she had forgiven him. She felt elated and cleansed. Even the
baby seemed to have approved for it kicked and danced for hours as if in celebration.
Over dinner that night, Allana told Gavin the news of Kendrick’s death and her forgiveness of him. Gavin thought for a long time. “Am I happy that he is dead?” Gavin mused. “To be honest, Allie, yes, I am, but it must have been a dreadful death. Still, God or the Devil has him now and he is no longer our concern.”
“He did us two favors, though,” she said, smiling. “He brought Leann and Munro to our doors and I am grateful for that.”
“As am I,” Gavin yawned. Allana took the ribbon out of his hair and teased it around his face. “You really are the most beautiful man I have ever seen,” she said huskily. “Never, never change, Gavin.”
He picked up her hand and kissed the palm then yawned again. “Thank you, sweet thing, but I must sleep. I had a hard day today, so I am going to bed. Why do you not come too?”
She looked up and smiled suggestively.
“To sleep!” He frowned and gave her a playful smack on the backside to move her upstairs.
“You always say that,” she said, looking over her shoulder, “but you never mean it!”
“I mean it now,” he replied sternly.
“You always say that too.” They had reached the top of the stairs and she wound her arms around his neck. “Admit it, m’laird, you cannot resist me.”
“I freely admit it,” he sighed and kissed her.
Allana had been unable to go on with her knitting project while she was pregnant and as a married woman, she found it impossible to be away from Gavin anyway. She knew that she had to hire someone else if the project was to carry on, but the only person she could think of with a modicum of intelligence, common sense, and skill with people was Leann and no doubt she had concerns of her own.
Leann taught French to the middle-class and wealthy children in the town where she lived. It kept her mind occupied sometimes, but she was restless and lonely. She had rented out her house on Mull and was now a relatively comfortable widow, so many men came to court her including older ones. Looking at Allana and Gavin’s happy marriage, she was tempted by one or two of them, but no-one ever came close to her aspirations.
When Allana summoned her, she was dying of boredom. She left hastily and got to Ingram Castle just before midnight. It was Midsummer Day and the light would last until almost midnight. Much work had to be done at this time of year, for the oncoming winter days had only six or seven hours of daylight. Gavin stayed out very late and was often too tired to come home and make love to his wife which was just as well since Allana was no longer comfortable.
She was now so big she could hardly walk, but when Leann paid her an unexpected visit, she managed to almost squeeze the breath out of her anyway. The two friends took stock of each other for a moment. Leann pointed to Allana’s baby bump.
“How long?” she asked.
Allana blew out a long sigh. “Too long, my friend,” she said with a painful laugh. “My legs are sore, my back is sore, and sometimes, even my hair is sore! Look at my fingers! Do they not resemble sausages?” She held them out and Leann had to admit that the puffy white digits were not a pretty sight.
Leann patted her on the back. “At least when this is all over, you can look into the eyes of your little Allan or little Gavina,” she said, laughing. “Now, tell me, Mother, why did you want to see me, except to gaze upon my lovely form?”
“There is something I want you to do for me,” Allana replied.
Leann raised her eyebrows expectantly. “Do tell!”
“I want you to take over my knitting trade,” Allana said, studying Leann’s face carefully. “I do not want the families who are earning money from selling their goods to suffer because they have no help. I cannot think of a better person to do it and you already have some experience.”
Leann frowned. “I am flattered, but are you sure you want me to do it? You cannot find a better person?”
“There is no better person,” Allana stated simply. Just then, she gasped and put her hand on her stomach. Leann stood up to raise the alarm. “Do not worry. It happens all the time,” Allana reassured her. “The midwife says it is my womb practicing for the birth.”
Leann looked down at the wet, spreading stain on Allana’s dress. “My dear, the practice is over,” she said wryly. “It looks as though the performance is about to begin.”
Allana looked down at her lap, terrified. “Leann...” Her eyes were wide with alarm.
“Shh... It is only your waters breaking and I have seen it before. Leann is here,” she consoled her. “Leave everything to me. I cannot have the baby for you, but I can do everything else.” She helped Allana to bed and called a housemaid to sit with her.
40
The Birth
Leann was a born organizer. She immediately sent a servant to find Gavin, who was away at one of the outlying crofts that day, then sent one of the grooms to get the midwife, but to her consternation, he came back half-an-hour later saying that she was busy delivering a breech baby and would come as soon as she could.
Right, Leann thought, I am not a midwife, but there must be one of the maids here who has had children. She went to the servants’ hall where a number of startled faces, both male and female, looked up at her.
“Has anyone here ever delivered a baby?” Leann asked, looking around inquiringly. All the women looked at each other and then one, a tall, thin woman, put up her hand.
“Mistress,” she said timidly, “my name is Nan. I have had six o’ my ain if that helps. I knaw whit tae dae, but I dinnae hae herbs tae get rid o’ pain an’ sich. Is... Is it milady?”
“Yes, Nan,” Leann replied. “I will not force you, but will you help? I will be there too.”
After a moment’s hesitation, Nan nodded and stood up. So did three other housemaids. “You cannot all be there!” Leann protested.
“Ye dinnae knaw how lang milady will take,” Nan said. “It may be a good idea tae have somebody else jist in case.”
This made sense, so Leann nodded and a procession of housemaids went upstairs to the door of Allana’s bedroom. They could already hear her moaning and gasping. As they went in, the young woman who had been sitting by Allana’s bedroom made a hasty exit.
Leann held her hand, mopped her brow, and said words of encouragement in her ear. In the pauses between pains, she rubbed Allana’s feet. She had no idea if she was doing the right thing, but Allana, although she could hardly speak for exhaustion, smiled at her tiredly once or twice.
“Thank you, Leann,” she whispered. “I could not do this without you.”
“I think you would have done just fine,” Leann replied, stroking the damp hair back from her brow as she kissed it.
The labor lasted six hours, and Gavin still had not made an appearance. Then Nan cried, “Stop pushin’ Milady! I can see the heid!”
Allana rested for a moment and took small gulps of air then with one mighty heave, she pushed the baby out into the world. The heave was accompanied by a banshee-like scream which took the very last bit of Allana’s energy. She closed her eyes and was lying gasping for breath when in burst a very disheveled and anxious Gavin.
“Allie!” he cried. He went straight to her side and took her face in his hands. “How are you? Is everything all right?”
“I am fine.” Her voice was hoarse, but she managed a weak smile. “Is it a boy or a girl?”
“A girl, milady, a fine big lassie she is an’ a’!” Nan held up the baby who was weeping the heartrending cries of a newborn and handed it to Allana.
“Gavin, is she not beautiful?” Allana asked, beaming down at the little red squashed face with the tortured expression.
Gavin looked at his new daughter doubtfully. “A really gorgeous wee lassie!” he said, summoning up as much enthusiasm as he could. However, the child looked very unattractive to him.
Seeing his face, Nan laughed. “They a’ look like that at first, m’laird. She will be as bonnie as a bluebell i
n a wee while.”
Gavin looked at Leann who nodded in agreement. She had seen newborns before and had never thought them pretty. The child was very dark, like Allana, and Gavin hoped she stayed that way. He felt ecstatic, unimaginably happy, as if he could fly. Allana smiled up at him and he thought he had never seen her look more beautiful.
“Did I do well, m’laird?” she whispered.
“Indeed, you did, milady,” he murmured, “indeed you did.”
After she left Allana’s breast, Leann settled the little girl and tucked her friend up in bed. She kissed her on the forehead and tiptoed out then went downstairs for a well-deserved glass of wine and something to eat. To her surprise, Munro was there. He stood up when he saw her, looking delighted.
“Mistress Leann!” he cried. “How wonderful to see you! I hear you have been doing some very good work today.”
Leann shook her head and sighed, flopping into a seat. I can only imagine how tired Allana must feel, she thought. Munro gave her a glass of wine and she sipped it gratefully.
“You look hungry, Leann,” he observed.
“Does it show?” She laughed. They sat in a comfortable silence for a while as she watched the fire thinking about the baby and Allana’s exhaustion. Such a lot of work, but such a great reward, she thought with a stab of heartache. If only she was mine!
The next day, Munro had to leave. He had merely dropped in on a flying visit while doing business in the area, but he wished he had more time to stay with the Ingrams since they were wonderful company and Leann with her intelligence and wit was always a tonic to his battered spirit. He had asked her over breakfast whether she would be coming to his area soon and she had shrugged.
“If work brings me that way, I suppose,” she replied, smiling.
“I am extending an open invitation to you,” he told her, “and if I hear that you have been in my vicinity without visiting, I will be very offended!”
She laughed. “I give you my word I will visit as long as you do not expect me to make polite conversation with ladies and flirt with men. Both of them bore me to tears!”