Courtly Love

  All thoughts of her husband were wiped from Serena's mind as she was caught from behind to be held in a crushing embrace.

  "Serena, dearest sister!" Bryan laughed at her as she struggled to be free. "I see Gyles has not succeeded in subduing your spirit."

  Serena shook herself free of Bryan's arms and grinned back at him. "You need a good lesson in manners, Bryan. Nellwyn failed miserably with you." But she took the arm he offered and they proceeded to wander through the hall.

  "When did you arrive?" Bryan asked when they had found a secluded corner.

  "Only today, but I have already met the queen and am serving as one of her ladies."

  "Perhaps you can teach these oafish Norman women some of your charms."

  "Bryan," Serena rebuked him. "The queen is a most gracious woman and she speaks most highly of the king."

  "Did you expect she would not?" Bryan glared. "Look at the way these pompous Normans strut about."

  "Bryan, please!" Serena said nervously. "You mustn't say things like that! It could get you into trouble."

  Bryan eyed her suspiciously. "I am speaking only to my sister; how could that be dangerous? Unless she has forgotten her Saxon heritage as so many others have."

  " 'Tis of no use trying to make me feel guilty, Bryan, because what I say is for your own good." Serena placed a hand on Bryan's arm. "Will you calm yourself and listen to me? The queen asked me to speak to you—"

  "The queen!" Bryan snorted. "What are you supposed to make me do—fight for William? Well, he will wait a long time for that to happen."

  "Bryan, I don't wish to fight with you. Please, only listen to me."

  Bryan sighed and drew his sister a goodly distance from the majority of the people. "Serena, I have no desire to fight with you either, but I am certain I already know what you are to tell me. It is what father has been saying to me for the past year, is it not? You never took sides before your marriage and I ask you to do the same now."

  "Only listen to me, Bryan," Serena pleaded.

  Bryan smiled affectionately. "You are stubborn, sister. Very well, say what you will if 'twill put your mind at ease."

  "I don't know what you have been doing, Bryan, but I can well imagine. A raiding party here and there; inciting others to treason; revolt against William. Am I fairly accurate?" Bryan nodded reluctantly and Serena drew a deep breath. "And what have you accomplished? Nothing! Nothing has changed, Bryan. Be reasonable; eleven years have passed since William defeated Harold at Hastings."

  "Murdered would be more like it," Bryan said grimly.

  "No, Bryan, William was the victor of a fair battle and you know that is the truth. You also know that William's claim to England's throne was every bit as valid as Harold's. 'Twas Harold who caused the loss of so many Saxon lives by his refusal to accept William as the successor to the throne."

  "Edward was half-Norman himself, that pious monk! Who else would he select, having no heir of his own? For twelve years Harold loyally served and protected this realm—'twas right and just that he should be our king."

  "Right or wrong, Bryan, William was named as successor, not Harold!"

  "There were no witnesses to that, Serena, only William's word that Edward chose him."

  Serena passed a hand over her eyes. "All right, I will grant you that point. But William was the victor and thus gained the right to the throne."

  "His throne is drenched with Saxon blood, Serena! Can you forget that?"

  "Bryan, I was only seven at the time and you were but nine. Be reasonable, how much do either of us remember about Edward or Harold?"

  "I do not have to remember them in order to dislike being ruled by a Norman pig! Do you not wish for a king of our own people? I do! I wish to see a Saxon once more on England's throne."

  "How will you accomplish that? And who will ascend the throne? Edgar the Atheling—a weak, sickly boy who has never even seen England? There are others who covet the throne as well, but that way brings destruction; brother set against brother, as each does battle to see his favorite wear the crown. Would you deliver England to such a fate? It is futile, Bryan! Have we not seen more than enough bloodshed as we grew up?"

  Bryan rounded on Serena, his dark blue eyes flashing into hers. "Yes, "I've seen enough bloodshed—enough to last me the rest of my life! I have seen decent, kind men stripped of their lands and Norman lords put in their place. I have watched as William's brave knights dragged our countrymen out of their castles and out onto the green to be tortured before—if they were lucky—the knights killed them. Shall I tell you what the Normans do, Serena? They heat their daggers until they show red-hot, then the prisoners are stripped of their garments. They lay their blades upon the prisoner's naked skin until his flesh is peeled off in strips. Do you know what happens to a Saxon man if he dares to look upon a Norman lady? They castrate him, Serena. If a Saxon woman gazes at a Norman man, he can have her—"

  "Stop, Bryan! Were any of our fine, Saxon laws any better? We killed starving serfs for killing game that would feed their families. Was that fair? We beat our housecarls as if they were beasts if they were slow in obeying an order. Was that just or merciful? Norman or Saxon, it makes no difference. Both can be cruel. Are we any better, Bryan? Are you just when you raid villages and slay innocent men, women, and children? Or does your end justify such atrocities!" Serena halted, her breast heaving in anger and concern for her brother's life.

  Bryan stared at her, his mouth hanging open. "I have killed no innocents," he said slowly.

  "Not yet, but you will eventually, won't you?" Serena shook Bryan by his shoulders. "Won't you? Some of your men already have, haven't they? How long will it take before you become as bloodstained as they are?"

  "Don't, Serena," Bryan croaked.

  "How long, Bryan?" Serena asked sharply. "How long before you become as beastial as you claim the Normans are? Will I some day awake to find you holding a blade to my children's throats because they have Norman blood running through their veins? Will you kill me because I married a Norman?"

  Bryan was appalled. "I would never harm you or yours, sister. I would turn the blade upon myself before I would permit that."

  "That is what you say now, but will it be true a day, a week, a year from now? What do you think will happen to our family if you are arrested for treason? You and I are young and strong, but our father is not. He would not survive imprisonment. And if, by some miracle, you were released, where would you go? Your lands would have been gifted to some Norman lord the moment you were taken."

  "What would you have me do, Serena, turn my back on all I believe? Do you think so little of me?"

  "Nay, Bryan, just the opposite. Our parents taught us never to take the coward's way out. If you want to fight for our people, then fight! But not with a sword and armor, not by committing treason. Father is part of William's council, and when he dies, you will take his place. There you will be able to do much good for England. Fight if you must, but do it peacefully." Serena reached out and grasped Bryan's hands. "Dearest Bryan, I have no wish to see your head on a pike. I beg you to consider your actions."

  Bryan pulled Serena into his arms for a quick hug. "I shall think on your words, but I make you no promises —yet."

  Serena smiled. "More I cannot ask, Bryan. I know you will not disgrace our family; for if you do, Aurelia and her kin will fall heir to Broughton, of that I am certain." With great satisfaction, Serena noted the change that came over Bryan's features at her words. Well, a small white lie could do no harm, Serena thought. Bryan was fiercely possessive about Broughton and would do everything he could to keep it intact for his own son. In that respect Bryan and his father were similar. She had given him enough to ponder, so Serena deftly changed the subject. "Did Father come with you?"

  Bryan took her arm and once again they circulated through the hall. "No, but Aurelia—as you would guess —insisted on coming without him. Did Beda accompany you?"

  Serena nodded. "Oh, Beda wouldn't have missed t
his if both of her legs were broken, you can depend on that. As you can imagine, the trip here was anything but pleasant."

  "Father will be disappointed that he did not see you." Bryan frowned. "Could you come home for a while, Serena, after your stay at court?"

  "Father?" Serena asked with a slight tremor in her voice. "He's not well, is he?"

  Bryan shook his head. "He is not ill, yet neither is he well. It is as if he has no strength or will. He needs you, Serena; he speaks of you often."

  "I will speak to Gyles. Oh, the queen is retiring." Serena reached up to kiss Bryan's cheek. "Will I see you tomorrow?"

  "I'll come to your chamber. Good night, Serena."

  It took considerably less time to divest the queen of her clothing than it had to dress her, and this time Serena was not alone with Matilda, but was nearly lost in the flurry of a dozen other women trying to find favor with the queen. Serena eased herself out of the maelstrom and busied herself folding away the discarded royal garments. Serena had thought that once the queen was ready for bed her ladies were excused to their own chambers, but such was not the case. Until Matilda gave them leave to retire, her ladies-in-waiting remained in her chamber to provide entertainment and conversation. And such conversation!

  Serena's face burned bright red as the ladies fell to discussing the attributes of the young lords who were visiting the court. Even Matilda contributed her observations to the ribald comments, and Serena was astounded to hear the queen speak in such earthy terms. What was it Gyles had said? Matilda was a woman and bearing a title did not alter that. The conversation became even more blunt as the women began to describe, in intimate detail, what commended their newest lovers to them; yet it was obvious that no one but Serena was the least embarrassed by the conversation. And she realized with horror that she might be expected to add her observations to theirs. What could she say? Serena had known no other man but Gyles and she could not bring herself to speak of him.

  Salvation came from an unexpected quarter, for just then the woman Serena had admired during the evening meal breezed into the queen's bedchamber. Elspeth dipped into a brief curtsy then moved forward to be warmly embraced by Matilda.

  "Lady Elspeth, it has been too long since you were last with us!" Matilda pulled Elspeth down beside her. "I was grieved to learn of your recent loss."

  "That is kind of you, Your Highness." Elspeth's low, cultured voice floated through the room to Serena. Surely no other woman on earth was so perfect!

  Serena edged farther away, so that she could have an unobstructed view of Elspeth and in the process, bumped into one of the other women.

  "Oh! I beg your pardon." Serena turned to face a woman just slightly older than herself.

  A wave of a delicate hand dismissed Serena's apology. "In view of the circumstances"—she nodded her head toward Elspeth—" 'tis perfectly all right. I am Lady Catherine."

  Serena returned Catherine's smile and said, "My name is Serena."

  "You are Saxon, are you not?" As Serena's chin lifted, Catherine continued in her natural blunt speech— which, surprisingly, never offended those she met. "I meant nothing by that remark, Lady Serena, except to comment on your heritage. The question will be put to you many times during your stay, so I advise you to become accustomed to it."

  "I imagine you are right," Serena said with a small sigh. "But it does become wearying to be asked that so often. It makes me feel as if I had the plague!"

  Catherine's crystal laughter caused Serena to grin in spite of herself. "You are right, of course. Come, let's find a nice cozy corner where we can talk." When they were seated with a goblet of warm wine each, Catherine asked, "Is this your first time at court?"

  Serena nodded. "My father and brother have been here before, but I was never allowed to join them."

  "Small wonder! No doubt they feared for your honor, for I noticed throughout the meal that even the crown prince's eyes strayed often to you." Serena wrinkled her nose in distaste and Catherine laughed. "That, I take it, is for our dear William Rufus?" Serena nodded. "Well, I don't blame you; he is such a bully."

  "Have you been to court often?" Serena asked as she sipped her wine.

  "Every winter for the past four years, since I was fifteen. I loathe crossing the channel—'tis so choppy, and I fear I am not a good sailor. I detest being tossed about in the water like a toy. Tell me," Catherine leaned forward, "are you married?"

  "Indeed, yes," Serena answered with a bright smile. "My lord fought with our king at Hastings."

  "You are wed to one of us—a Norman? Well, it should come as no surprise, as lovely as you are. I suppose you had many suitors." There was a touch of sadness in Catherine's voice.

  "Nay, only two. A lad I had known all my life, and my husband who I did not meet until the day before we were wed. And you?"

  Catherine gave a small, wistful laugh. "That is why I am packed off to court every year, to find a husband. My family has nearly given up hope, I'm afraid. Nineteen years of age and still a maid."

  "You will find someone," Serena assured Catherine. "You are far prettier than I—I'll wager the men simply beat at your door day and night."

  Catherine grimaced. "That they do, but none bear a proposal of marriage." Catherine looked slyly at Serena. "However, I saw one tonight with whom I would not mind dallying."

  "Oh?" Serena's eyes flashed with mischief. "And is there some way I can be of service?"

  "Yes." Catherine pounced immediately on Serena's offer. "You can introduce me to him."

  Serena looked at Catherine blankly. "But I know no one here save for my husband ... and my brother."

  "And which was the one you spoke so long with after the meal?"

  "Oh, that was my brother," Serena said offhandedly, then her eyes widened. "Bryan? You wish to meet Bryan?"

  "So that is his name." Catherine mused. "It suits him most admirably, don't you think?"

  "Indeed I do. But... Bryan!"

  "He's not married is he?" Catherine asked worriedly.

  Serena laughed shortly. "Not that I know of. He ..." Serena paused. It had never occurred to her that Bryan was attractive to women. Undoubtedly her picture of her older brother differed radically from Catherine's. And perhaps if Bryan was occupied with Catherine he would have less time and energy to devote to treason. "I'll introduce you tomorrow," Serena decided.

  "Splendid!" Catherine squeezed Serena's hand in genuine delight. "You must speak of me in glowing terms so that he cannot wait to meet me."

  "Rest assured," Serena laughed. "For when I have done, Bryan will be happy just to beg a smile from you."

  "We shall get along famously, Serena," Catherine announced. A spate of laughter from the queen drew her attention and Catherine's brown eyes narrowed. "Have you had the dubious pleasure of meeting Lady Elspeth?"

  "Not yet." Serena tilted her head to one side. "She is lovely, isn't she?"

  Catherine shrugged. "On the outside, perhaps, but inside she's ugly as sin."

  "I cannot believe that. Anyone so beautiful could not possibly have a dark soul. Do you know her?"

  'To my eternal misery, yes. I met her the first time I came to court." Catherine's mouth pursed in disapproval. "Elspeth's husband was alive then, but he was off somewhere engaging in his favorite pastime—war. I suppose it was partly his fault that Elspeth was so unhappy, and when he returned the scandal had died down, but he still took her back to his castle—almost by force—then left her there while he went back to his silly war. She was forbidden to receive guests or go anywhere save for the cloister that she supported. He made her a virtual prisoner and now look at her—parading about in her mourning gowns when everyone knows she's ecstatic because he died."

  Gossip was as intregal a part of court life as was romance, and Serena, already caught up in Catherine's story, prodded her new friend on. "What scandal, Catherine? No, wait, let me guess." Serena chewed on a fingernail. "Elspeth finally met the man she loved here at court and when her husband found out he was
furious and dragged her off. And . . . and her lover killed himself out of remorse. Is that close?"

  Catherine shook her head. "What a vivid imagination, Serena. But, no, that's not precisely what happened. Elspeth was no more in love with her paramour than I am with your English winters. She was attracted to him, yes, and although I was only fifteen and everyone was very silent when I was around, it was common knowledge that they spent the nights together. And the mornings. And the afternoons. In the end, they were both tiring of each other, so when Elspeth's husband appeared, I think she was happy enough to leave. After all, he was quite wealthy and Elspeth has a taste for finery. As for her lover, I don't know, but I'm sure he didn't kill himself. I remember he was very handsome, the type that could make a woman melt if he wanted her to. I haven't seen him since then, but I would know him if I ever saw him. My mother was with me then, and she made certain I met only the eligible young men."

  "And he wasn't? Was he married?" Serena persisted.

  Catherine frowned. "I don't know. No one ever told me. All I knew was that I wasn't supposed to speak to him. Oh, look. There's the signal from the queen. Tis time we all retired. William hates for her to be surrounded by her women when he comes to her."

  Serena rose with Catherine. "I wonder how the council went?"

  "What council?" Catherine laughed.

  "Why, the one held tonight, of course."

  Catherine shook her head. "The first council is to be held the day after Christmas as it always is. The king insists that everyone enjoy themselves before they battle the affairs of state. You must have misunderstood. Who told you that?"

  Serena's brow creased. "I... I must have overheard it at the meal."

  "Well, I pity the poor man who spent this evening waiting in the council chamber."

  "Yes," Serena said absently as she walked beside Catherine to her chamber. Had Gyles been mistaken or had she not heard him correctly?

  Catherine was bidding her goodnight and Serena vaguely replied to Catherine's suggestion that they meet the following morning before attending the queen.