“Now, tell me what I said.”
You think I’m pretty, but not as good as your skanks. She almost said it.
“Tell me what I said.” His tone harsh.
She had to force the words out of her mouth. “You think I’m pretty.”
He grabbed the back of her head, pulled her until her forehead met his. His lips an inch away, his breaths heating her face. “Didn’t fuckin’ say that.” His hand slid to the back of her neck, fingers tightened, digging into her skin. “I said you’re beautiful, and I’ve known it a long time.”
Her chest clenched. God, why? Why was he doing this to her? Why did he want her to repeat a lie?
“Tiff.”
Unable to hold his stare any longer, she looked away and whispered, “You think I’m beautiful, and you’ve known it a long time.”
He flinched, his body jerking with the strength of it. Releasing her immediately, he leaned back like he’d been struck, leaving so much room between them it felt like they were miles away. She closed her eyes tightly then parted them and met his.
Gaze hard, the muscle in his jaw jumping. “You don’t believe it. I’m telling you, and you don’t believe it.”
His voice further proved how angry he was, and a little something else. She didn’t know what.
He planted his elbows on his knees, dropping his head and resting it on his hands. His thick hair so close now, so tempting to run her fingers through it.
He released a loaded breath then lifted his head. “You and me, we’re gonna be friends.”
Right, friends. Not ideal for her, just plain stupid. She’d never get over him if they stayed friends. But she was so pathetic, she’d take whatever piece of him he gave her.
“We’re gonna be best friends. I’m gonna tell you everything I can. In between all that shit, I’m gonna be telling you, I’m gonna continue to beat everything I just said into you till you believe me.”
She wouldn’t ever believe him. She knew the truth, the truth that lay in the years they’d known each other.
Chapter Six
Tiffany, no doubt, was the most frustrating woman he’d ever met. Everything Cuss said, she found a way to twist. Even when he told her he thought she was beautiful, had known it for years, she didn’t believe him.
He should’ve kissed her, pressed the length of him against her to prove how much he wanted her. The only thing that stopped him—what he knew to be true. She thought he only found her attractive because he hadn’t had sex in six days. He should’ve kissed her. Maybe it would’ve led to something more, but then, she would’ve convinced herself it was just a one night thing and used it as an excuse to push him out of her life. He didn’t want that, couldn’t have that. He wanted her for longer than a night and couldn’t risk losing her all together, even the little he had of her, so he decided they’d be friends. Only way to do it. She needed to get to know him first. He’d convince her he cared about her, show her he wanted her for more than one night. When he convinced her, he’d make them official.
After that night at the lounge when he told her they’d be friends, she tried to distance herself. Every time she tried, he grabbed her hand or slung his arm around her shoulders. It served a dual purpose. Every man in the lounge was looking at her, salivating with clear intent on striding her way to talk to her and buy her a drink. Over his dead body would he let any of those pricks get close. She was his girl whether she knew it or not.
Over the last week, he managed, even as hard as it was, to remain friends. He told her a lot about himself, about his life, about everything.
The first couple of days, she’d been distant. Cuss didn’t let that sway him. He talked and talked. He told her about his single, hard-working mother, told her about his spoiled brothers, told her how he found the club. It paid off. She forgot about the distance she tried to force and began talking back easily.
Tuesday, her parents arrived for her graduation. Luckily, they preferred to stay at a five-star hotel instead of at her place, so he hadn’t been left out on the street. She’d gone to dinner with them, to some fancy ass restaurant. He’d gone too but stayed out of sight. No need to let her father know he stayed. He couldn’t risk the progress he made and had her father known, he’d convince her to push him away. When she arrived home, she asked him if he planned to go to her graduation. The way she asked so softly almost like she didn’t want to ask at all, he knew she wanted him to go. He smiled and told her he wouldn’t miss it for the world.
He went. Then, too, he stayed out of sight. After graduation, she had dinner with her parents at another fancy ass restaurant. He followed, took a seat at the bar, and watched. When she arrived later that night, looking sad, he thought it had to do with her parents leaving. He gave her a hug, trying to console her. She hesitated, like she was thinking whether or not she should hug him back. After a second, she wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her cheek against his chest. Then she looked up to him and asked, “Why didn’t you go?”
He released her, plucked his phone out of his pocket, and showed her several pictures he took, all of her, all from a distance. She smiled that blinding smile that lit up her whole face, lit up the room. He then couldn’t help himself. He hugged her again, tight, resting his chin on the top of her head, and told her he was proud of her.
The next couple of days flew by. She’d hired movers to pick up her furniture and boxes and take them home, but she still needed to pack. They stayed cooped up in her apartment, packing. In the early evenings, they headed to the gym to work out for an hour or so. After they showered, they ordered in and watched a movie. So tired from packing, every evening she fell asleep midway through the movie. Didn’t fail. His favorite part, helplessly, her head would fall against his shoulder. The deeper she fell asleep, the closer her body snuggled against his. And because he wanted her so bad, he took advantage. He wrapped his arm around her, let her head fall against his chest, and he stayed that way until the movie ended. Only then would he carry her, lay her in bed, and cover her with a blanket. Alone, he headed back to the couch and slept.
But it was over now. Their two weeks, gone. They landed fifteen minutes ago, and this was where they parted. Her parents planned to pick her up at the airport.
He grabbed her hand and squeezed it tight. “We’re friends, right?”
Her eyes softened. She smiled and nodded.
“You gonna call me when you’re free, so we can hang out?”
She nodded.
“You gonna call me when you gotta problem and need to talk?”
She nodded.
“You gonna call me when you gotta problem I can fix?”
Eyes twinkling, she grinned. “I hope I don’t have another problem you need to fix.”
So did he. He wanted her safe, always.
Snaking his arms around her, he pulled her into his embrace. She went willingly, circling her arms around his waist.
He cupped the back of her neck, lowered his head, and whispered against her ear, “I’m gonna miss you.”
She drew away and teased, “I know, but you can easily fix that by hiring a cook and a maid.”
Smile in place, he shook his head. “Not the same as having you, baby girl.” No truer words.
Her gaze softened. Then she looked away.
He lifted her chin with his finger. “We can be roommates.”
She lifted a brow. “Wouldn’t you love that?”
He knew she teased him, but still, he couldn’t help but say, “Fuckin’ love it, having you walking around in little shorts, cooking me dinner, and making me feel like the luckiest SOB on earth.”
“I’d be making it too easy for you. All the benefits of having a girlfriend and none of the emotional entanglements.”
Shit. Why did she say shit like that all the time? It pissed him off, and right then, he couldn’t flip his lid, not while they said goodbye.
He laughed, but it was forced. “You think we’re not emotionally involved? After the last two
weeks? You know more about me than my own mother, than my brothers, and by brothers, I mean the club ’cause my blood brothers don’t know shit about me.”
She shrugged. “I suppose.”
Gripping her neck and lugging her toward him, he pressed a kiss to her forehead and whispered, “Call you later tonight, ’kay?”
She nodded. He didn’t want to let her go but had no other choice. He released her and watched her walk away.
The too familiar knotting in his stomach nearly took him to his knees.
****
A knock sounded on her door. Perfect time.
Tiffany smiled. Pulling the lasagna out of the oven, she set it on the counter to cool then removed her oven mitts.
She knew who it was. She would’ve known even if she hadn’t sent him a text an hour ago telling him she moved, having heard the roar of his bike. Her new neighbors would love that.
Since coming back home two weeks ago, Tiffany found a job at the only daycare center in town. The staff consisted of the owner, Betty, an older woman with graying hair, and one other employee, Stacy, a pretty blonde around her age. They watched twenty children under the age of five and were understaffed. Great news for her. She’d been hired on the spot. Betty had to deal with the parents, bills, and everything else that came with handling a business, meaning even with her help, they were understaffed. It also meant she’d been working long hours. She didn’t mind since she had less time to stew over her ever-growing infatuation with Thomas.
She thought after she landed in Wadden, she’d never hear from him again. She thought wrong. At the airport, he stared straight into her eyes and told her he’d call her. She remembered it so well, every detail. She’d made the effort to since she thought that’s where their story would end.
He kept his word and called her that night. He texted and called her the following day, and the day after that, they had lunch. Now they were friends, officially, speaking at least once a day, sometimes texting in between. Nothing heavy. He asked about her day, sent her pictures of the car or bike he was working on or something funny he’d seen. Since they’d gotten back, she’d seen him six times. Yes, she kept track, but it was nothing more than friendship. She knew this in her bones, but her heart leapt with each text, each call, each meeting.
At this point, she was in so deep, she didn’t care. She wanted to share her life with someone. Her high school friends, she now had little in common with. They were no more than acquaintances. Except for Tina, who she remained friends with but felt she couldn’t confide her silly problems to. Tina had bigger problems, working two jobs, going to school part-time, and a beautiful five-year-old girl, Della. Though her daughter wasn’t a problem but a responsibility.
She told her every day detail to Thomas, primarily because he asked every night when he called. Even so, some things she kept from him until the very last moment like the fact she planned to move. The only reason, she knew he’d insist on helping. Her parents hired movers, so a moot point. She texted him an hour ago after the movers left, and she was somewhat settled.
Her beige sectional in the living room, looking a little too big for the space since her new apartment was smaller than her place in LA, but it’d do for now. She didn’t want to spend money on a couch right then. Her flat screen television hung up on the wall across the couch, wood coffee table in between the two. Table and chairs in the dining room. Her bed set up, the rest of her furniture in her room in place.
While the movers did the heavy lifting, she unpacked the kitchen and most of her clothes. She still needed to hang frames, decorate a little, but she wanted Thomas to see her new place, so even if it wasn’t yet to her standards, still a bit of a mess, she’d invited him over and took time to grocery shop and make dinner.
Heading for the door, she parted it and smiled. He came to view, towering over her, arms crossed over his chest making his muscles bulge. He wore his usual, T-shirt, jeans, and his cut. His sapphire gaze narrowed, the muscle in his jaw jumping.
She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. “Are you coming in or are you waiting for dinner to get cold?”
The sides of his mouth twitched like he wanted to smile. The stare down ensued until finally he sniffed, uncrossed his arms, and strode inside. She closed and locked the door then faced him.
“I’m pissed, baby girl.” This, he said looking around her new place.
She smirked and lifted a brow. “You won’t be after you have some of my lasagna. It’s the best in the whole state.” She shrugged. “Or so I’ve heard.”
He looked to her, lips still twitching, then gave up and grinned. “Know me too well.”
“I guess you just proved men can be won over with a meal.”
He glanced around the living room, again. She could guess what he was thinking. While her place was nice, wood floors, dark cabinets with marble counter tops, new stainless steel appliances, it wasn’t huge. She could’ve rented a bigger apartment, like her parents wanted, but she insisted on one she could pay for on her own.
Her parents hadn’t been thrilled when she told them she wanted her own place. They wanted her to stay home where they could continue to invite eligible bachelors for dinner in hopes she’d agree to date one then fall in love, get married, and give them grandchildren. Fourteen days living at home equated to seven bachelors. None of them interested her. Not to mention, she lived alone for close to four years in college and without two overbearing yet well-meaning parents, so she decided day five, she needed to get her own place. They agreed because bottom line, they loved her and wanted her happy. Case in point, when she told them she planned on getting a job in childhood education. They hadn’t been excited then either, but they agreed.
They also encouraged her to buy a home instead of renting an apartment considering she had a trust fund she could now use since she graduated from college. She axed that. No matter how many millions her dad stowed away for her, she wanted an apartment she could afford on her salary. Besides, no point in living alone in a big, empty house.
“Nice place.”
“Thanks.” She smiled. “It’s small, but that’s okay. I’ve never felt comfortable in a big place all by myself.”
He lifted a brow. “Yeah?”
Without thought, probably because their friendship had evolved to a point where she trusted him, she admitted, “It just reinforces how alone you are.”
His gaze intensified and held hers for several seconds. “Don’t like being alone?”
“Does anyone?”
“Why’d you move then? Could’ve stayed at home with your mom and dad.”
“True, but I’ve also been on my own for four years. Their meddling, even as innocent as it is, is annoying. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind being alone. I’m used to it, and at times, I enjoy it, but being alone in a big apartment or in a house reinforces that you’re lonely. No one wants to feel like that even if they like it. Besides, it’s more places to clean.”
He closed the distance between them and leaned into her. His lips so close she could taste his breath. “You don’t ever gotta be alone, Tiff. Any time, any place, you call me, I’ll be there.”
Damn.
She hated when he did that, when he said things that made her heart flutter. He did it often, too often, said things that with his actions could be almost romantic.
She blinked, took a step back then turned and headed into the kitchen. Fifteen minutes had passed, no doubt. It meant the lasagna was cool enough to serve. She cut a slice and plated it for him then cut herself a piece and set them on the four-seat dining room table.
She looked up. He hadn’t moved, not a muscle.
“Are you going to try my lasagna?” She hoped and prayed she sounded unaffected. Her heart still pounded too loud, and her stomach was in knots. She couldn’t help but imagine what it would’ve been like had that scene played out differently.
She’d never know.
Chapter Seven
The more things
changed, the more they stayed the same. The more Cuss integrated himself in her life, the more their friendship solidified.
Tiffany moved to Wadden, got a job, moved out of her parents, and still, they were friends.
Just friends.
He didn’t know where to go from there. Their relationship was so complicated, and still, he had no clue where he stood with her besides being her friend.
She confided in him because he pushed, and he pushed because there was no other way she’d tell him anything if he didn’t. He needed her to trust him, and to trust him, she needed to be comfortable enough to tell him shit, not just simple shit but everything, so he called. He texted. He asked about her day, her life. He pushed. She responded, but sometimes, she held back. Over the phone, he heard it in her voice, and via text, she didn’t respond as quickly.
Cuss often slipped, admitted shit he didn’t need to admit, but even then, no matter how earth shattering his admission, she acted like he never said it. And all that did was make him think she didn’t want what he did. Part of the reason he hadn’t made a move, he couldn’t afford to fuck up what they had even if it was just a friendship. If friendship was all he ever had of her, then his life would be better than what it’d been without her.
He wanted to tell her the truth, needed to, but before he did, he needed to know she wanted him for keeps. She was attracted to him. Every time he tugged off his shirt, he caught her looking at him, but that was just physical attraction. He needed to be sure it was more. He hadn’t lied. Honest to God, he had her after so many years, he wouldn’t be able to let her go. She had to want him for all the fucked, poor shittiness in him.
And at this point, Cuss didn’t think she was close, so he was losing hope, beginning to wonder if he made a mistake thinking friendship had been the way to go. He questioned time and time again if he’d stupidly put himself in the friend zone and what he could do to take himself out.
No matter what, he wouldn’t stop calling her, hanging around her, inviting her out. He called her that morning and brought her to the club cookout. He’d never taken her to a club event before. Not that there were many.
Running Hot (Hell Ryders MC Book 2) Page 7