"So beautiful." Jared's murmured words were said against the soft skin of Kyle's stomach, the vibrations sending shivers of delight up and down his backbone.
Kyle groaned, then quickly drew in a jagged breath as Jared started pulling his finger back out. The slow internal drag was exquisite, so too the feeling of pressure. Yet Kyle quickly realized it wasn't enough. Anything he did with Jared was not going to be anywhere near enough; he was always going to want more. God, how could he nearly have fucked this up?
Jared continued to kiss and tease as he sank his finger back inside, bringing Kyle close to a point when he was going to start begging. Then Jared gave one last swipe with his tongue, one last little kiss, and sat up. Kyle closed his eyes for a moment, relying on his other senses to feel what Jared was doing, to listen to the small sounds Jared was making, to smell the heady scent of arousal that rose from their heated bodies; then he opened his eyes and looked up, surprised to see Jared's gaze focused on the way he moved his finger in and out. With each plunge, Jared's glistening tongue slipped out of his mouth. Kyle watched it, fascinated, the pink wet tip a parody of how Jared was easing back and forth.
So intent was he on the sensual display, he didn't notice when Jared inserted another finger, stretching him wider. It was only when Jared twisted his hand and curled his fingers to stroke across Kyle's heated gland that he had his focus taken off one type of pleasure and onto another.
The sound that came out of his throat was deep and plaintive, and as Jared glanced up at him, Kyle unconsciously began to match Jared's movements, thrusting up to meet Jared's probing fingers as they slowly fucked him. Jared did that eyebrow thing again, and Kyle almost laughed.
"Can't help it," he said instead. "Fucking good."
A beautifully soft smile spread over Jared's face. "I know, believe me, I know. I'm going to stretch you a little more, okay?"
"Yeah." Kyle held still, grimacing slightly as he felt the burn, but it was gone as quickly as it started. The extra finger filled him, and he belatedly wondered how much thicker Jared's cock was going to feel. That thought caused his internal muscles to clench. Jared hissed through his teeth. Kyle gripped tighter, and a ripple of pleasure began to flare outward, shifting from one pulse point to another.
"I think you're ready," Jared managed to get out through a clenched jaw. He withdrew his fingers with agonizing control. Kyle remembered how Jared had complained when he had done that to him, and now he knew why.
Jared deftly slicked himself up with lube and took a tighter grip on Kyle's thigh. He pressed forward with his throbbing shaft, the blunt tip smearing across Kyle's waiting hole, pausing only for a second before penetrating him. Kyle was determined to take all of Jared with one thrust, so as soon as Jared breached the relaxed muscle, he pushed up to join him.
"All of you," he ground out, bearing down to ease the entry of Jared's ample length, holding his breath until Jared's thighs met his in an intimate kiss. Stretched, full, Kyle whimpered. Jared instantly stilled.
"Am I hurting you?" he asked, concern clouding his eyes.
Kyle shook his head. "No. But just...give me a minute."
It wasn't how full he was, or the pleasure he could feel, it was simply that Jared was in him, which made Kyle want to savor this. What kind of fucking fool had he been to walk away from him? If Jared forgave him, Kyle knew damn well he'd want to stay with him. Even here, in this house, in this town. He could learn to deal with the memory of past pain and hurt, the humiliation and disgrace of his family's rejection. He could deal with it, if Jared could deal with having him.
Hard, sweat-slicked body poised and ready above him, Jared patiently waited. "You can move now," Kyle told him. Jared's mouth lifted, but then his eyes darkened. Kyle watched them, understanding the nuances. "I'm not going to break, Jared. You don't have to be gentle with me."
Jared nodded. "I'll go as slow as I can, okay?"
"You like it hard and fast," Kyle reminded him.
"I know, but..."
Kyle reached for Jared's hand and curled his fingers around it. He squeezed. "You're not going to hurt me," he said, trying to reassure him, though he wasn't convinced he'd succeeded.
Jared nodded and squeezed his hand in return. "If you don't like it, stop me."
"Will I have time?" Kyle asked, suddenly grinning. He could already see the strain on Jared's face; he didn't think Jared was going to take long.
"Probably not." Jared flexed his fingers on Kyle's thigh. "You all right like this? I want to watch." He looked down at where their bodies joined, his gaze hot and intent.
Kyle groaned. Watching Jared as Jared watched them fucking was not something Kyle would have suspected would turn him on any more than he already was.
"That a yes?" Jared asked.
Kyle nodded, not trusting his voice any longer. He looked up into Jared's eyes and saw a brief flash of lust before it settled into something else. Could that something be forgiveness? Was Kyle hoping for too much?
"You ready?"
Kyle nodded again. He expected Jared to pull partway out and slam into him. Instead Jared pushed a little deeper and then pulled back a tiny bit, starting a very short pattern of quick but gentle thrusts. Almost disappointed, Kyle concentrated on the slight tingle of pleasure just barely felt, wondering how he was going to come if that was all there was going to be. Then Jared grunted, and the small thrusts changed, becoming longer, faster. Kyle suddenly realized Jared was building up his pace and depth, and he steeled himself for the onslaught. The sparse tingle started to increase with each inward plunge and quickly became a fully-fledged melee of ecstasy by the time Jared had got into his rhythm. Hard and fast was what Jared had said, and hard and fast was what he did.
Kyle was dazed at the sensations that pulsed through him. Each glide of Jared's hard length slid across his prostate, sending electric shocks to pierce and shred every nerve ending. His cock was so hard Kyle knew if he touched it, it would burst in his hand. He couldn't concentrate; instead he could only let each shocking wave of pure bliss sweep over him, drawing him into a pool of constant and unbelievable pleasure. Heat enveloped his body, mingling with the blazing touch of Jared's skin on his. The rising scent of arousal filled the air around him, invading his nostrils, painting his tongue, letting him taste the pulsing need building in both of them. Reflexively his body began to arch into the thrusts in a frantic effort to end it. He needed to come, yet some part of him wanted to wait, wanted to feel Jared's seed fill him, wanted to know their culmination was total, mutual. He just wanted to know Jared still wanted him.
The slap of Jared's flesh on his and the thrust of Jared's flesh in his became a focal point. He reached for it, his moans and cries mingling with Jared's endless panting grunts. His gaze latched on to Jared's, his lover's hazel eyes stunningly gold. Then Jared's face contorted as his impetus froze, his hips ramming home.
"Oh fuck, Kyle!"
Kyle gasped and then moaned as he felt the hot fluid of Jared's orgasm saturate him. The knowledge, the experience, the realization that this was how it should always be triggered his own. Crying out, he shuddered as not only did his inner muscles constrict and pulse, milking Jared's cock further, but his own cock shot out a load of thick, sticky cum onto his chest and belly.
Jared collapsed onto him, his weight squashing Kyle into the mattress and his cum between them. Kyle winced as his bruised chest was crushed, but he didn't say anything, happy enough to have Jared in his arms. Harsh breaths misted against his neck as Jared groaned, fighting no doubt to put some air into tortured lungs. Kyle just held him; there was nothing else for him to do. He couldn't move, his limbs were useless, and the contact of Jared's hard abs on his cock was too delicious for him to want to change anyway. Eventually though, his chest hurting and his breathing restricted, he tapped Jared on the shoulder.
"Shit, sorry, forgot." Jared immediately pushed up and carefully untangled himself from Kyle's limbs to sit on the edge of the bed.<
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For a long while, neither of them said anything, and Kyle began to worry. He'd kind of expected to see Jared smile, hoped to hear him say something that would allow Kyle to mend what he'd done. What he didn't expect was to see Jared stare at him with a hard, inscrutable expression in his eyes.
"Jared?"
His stillness was unnerving; it was as if he was waiting for something. Cold fear started at the base of Kyle's skull and slid slow, vicious fingers down his spine. What had he done wrong? What the fuck had he done wrong?
Chapter Six
It took every ounce of self-control not to pull Kyle into his arms right then and make love to him again. It also took every ounce of self-control not to start yelling at him. Both joy and anger threaded through him in equal measures. Touching Kyle, making love to him had brought home how much the man meant to him, how much he wanted him, and Kyle obviously felt the same. How could he not after what they'd just done, so why the fuck had he walked away? Confusion melded with resentment while his body throbbed from being inside Kyle and his hands tingled from touching him, none of it helping in trying to sort out what to do next. Kyle's eyes were intent on his, and his face looked paler than it had before. Trembling fingers raked through mussed hair, the blond locks damp with sweat and sticking up on end. There was a plea in those intense blue eyes, one perhaps for understanding or just plain forgiveness.
Jared shook his head, not ready to forgive, though he wished to fuck he understood. He wanted to ask Kyle why he'd walked away from something that could have been good between them, but was half-afraid he wouldn't like the answer. Maybe Kyle saw that question in his eyes, because a hint of something darkened the bright blue in Kyle's before he dropped his gaze and bit his bottom lip, a faint flush creeping up his pale cheeks. Fuck, he looked so vulnerable sitting there, his bruised and battered body a stark reminder of how close he'd come to dying. Ignoring the hot jab of pain that lanced through his chest at the memory of seeing him lying in the middle of the road, Jared focused instead on the fact that he now had Kyle in his bed. But did Kyle really want to be there?
Anger once more overrode everything else. He wanted to get out of there. Wanted to remove himself from the man who confused him, hurt him, but he couldn't. He wouldn't turn his back on Kyle the same way Kyle had turned his back on him. Frustrated, irritated, Jared got up from the bed to get something to clean them both when Kyle gripped his arm.
"You're angry again."
Jared didn't deny it this time. "Yes."
"Why?"
Why? That was the multimillion-dollar question right now, wasn't it? And what was he supposed to say? Because I just fucked you and you let me? He didn't want to be angry at Kyle for that. Hell, he didn't want to be angry at Kyle at all. Shrugging, he couldn't look at him, didn't want to see hurt in his eyes, not when Jared was already hurting enough for both of them.
Kyle's fingers tightened on his arm. "I'm sorry."
Startled, Jared turned to him. "What?"
"For leaving you. I'm sorry."
"No! I don't want to hear an apology from you, Kyle. I don't want to hear any fucking excuses, either. What you did there's no excuse for."
Kyle's face went white. "I know that."
"Then why? Why the fuck did you leave me?"
Kyle's blue eyes blazed as he lifted his chin and stared at him. "Why did you want me to come home with you?"
"What the fuck has that got to do with anything?"
"Just answer the question, Jared. Why?"
"I told you. You need someone to look after you."
"And that's it?" Kyle looked resentful. Well, fine. That made two of them. Kyle shook his head. "Look, forget about it, okay. As soon as I can, I'll be out of your way."
Abruptly at a loss, Jared stood, no longer sure what to say, what to do, his anger draining away as suddenly as it had begun. He didn't want Kyle to go, but what did he have to make him stay? Taking a deep breath, Jared let it out on a shaky sigh.
"I'm going to get a cloth to clean us up," he said, standing.
"Are you coming back to bed?"
Jared hesitated. "Do you want me to?"
Kyle held his gaze, but Jared could see it was a struggle. Shit, he didn't like Kyle's loss of confidence; it had been one of the things Jared was attracted to. Before Kyle could say anything, Jared leaned down and kissed him. He knew he'd caught Kyle by surprise, but even as Kyle gasped, Jared swept his tongue inside and claimed his mouth. God, he wanted this man; he wanted him so much. He had no intention of letting Kyle leave, not when he'd only just got him here. When he pulled back, Kyle looked up at him with big blue eyes.
"Well?" Jared asked. "Do you want me to?"
Kyle nodded and then smiled. "Yeah."
"Good, and tomorrow we'll talk."
His desk was a mess. Files littered the timber top, papers were scattered among folders, and forms peppered every other available space; and Jared couldn't give a damn. He'd given up trying to work, hadn't even really made a dent in it. His thoughts, his focus was on Kyle.
Last night when he'd come back with a warm washcloth, he'd found Kyle asleep, his big body spread over the bed. In that instant, Jared had experienced a sick feeling of deja vu and only just managed not to wake Kyle up and beg him not to leave in the morning. But Kyle couldn't leave, not on his own and not in the condition he was in, and it was that lack of choice that made Jared wary. Kyle was virtually his prisoner, which didn't make Jared feel any better about the situation, and he still hadn't felt particularly happy about it when he got up that morning. Kyle had remained asleep, and instead of waiting for him to wake up, Jared had slunk out of the house, not ready to face him or his own fears.
A small twinge of guilt hit him at the thought of Kyle waking up without him being there, but he'd left a note letting him know he wasn't going to be too long. He'd promised Kyle they'd talk, but right now he needed some space, some time. Time to think, time to sort out his emotions, because the last couple of days had almost ripped him apart. He'd never been on so many highs or lows, and he was exhausted. Even now he wasn't sure what to feel, except whatever it was, it was more than he'd ever felt before. But maybe he shouldn't let himself feel anything until he knew for certain Kyle could feel the same way about him.
Jared rubbed his hands over his face, trying not to think about what had happened between him and Kyle last night but unable to think about anything else. He knew Kyle felt something for him, but what? Lust? Passion? Desire? Yes, those he knew about, but what else? Was there something more? Again Jared had to question why Kyle had let him fuck him. Let him? No, Kyle hadn't let him; he'd invited it, had practically instigated it. Why? Especially when Kyle had then made it obvious he didn't want to be there. But that, Jared admitted, could have entirely been his fault. He hadn't accepted Kyle's apology when it had been given and he hadn't been particularly nice about it either, but fuck, it had been painful to hear.
For two days, he'd sat at the hospital and heard Kyle's softly spoken apology over and over again, the whispered words said in the midst of Kyle's unconsciousness or sleep. He hadn't wanted to hear those words again, hadn't wanted Kyle to apologize for something Jared now feared he'd been responsible for.
Lost in thought, Jared didn't hear anyone enter his office, and he only looked up when a knuckle rapped against his desk.
"Jared."
"Sally. Oh, hi, didn't hear you come in." Jared quickly looked into his sister's face, then dropped his gaze. Crap. His bright, bubbly sister was not someone he wanted to tackle right now.
"I'm surprised you're here. I thought you'd still be at the hospital." Sally's light voice made Jared take a deep breath and look up at her again. Sally was his physical opposite. Petite, she barely came to his shoulder. Her long, golden hair fell to her waist, and her pale eyes often looked gray, though they were officially blue. And they were always smiling, like now.
"We came home last night," Jared replied, suddenly realizing
what he'd said when Sally gasped.
"You brought him home!"
"It's not what you think," Jared quickly defended. "He needs someone to look after him," he added by way of explanation, hoping that might put Sally off any ideas. He should have known better.
"So why didn't he stay at the hospital?"
How the hell was he supposed to get out of this? Jared tried to shift his gaze, but Sally quite literally moved to put herself in his line of sight.
"Jared? What's going on?"
"Nothing. He just didn't want to stay there any longer, and he had nowhere else to go."
"Jared, I'm neither stupid nor naive. You don't bring a gay man home with you without a bigger reason than he just didn't have anywhere else to go."
"I never said he was gay!"
"You didn't have to. I could see in your eyes talking about him makes you uncomfortable, and if he wasn't gay and you weren't attracted to him, you wouldn't keep trying to avoid my eyes. So why don't you just fess up and tell me who he is, where you met him, and how long you've known him?" Jared stared into his sister's intelligent eyes. She was tenacious as well as perceptive and would keep on badgering him until he eventually caved in. He also couldn't lie; she would know the instant he tried. But could he tell her about Kyle, tell her everything?
He stood up and took a short walk to the window, which afforded him a view of the whole yard and the twenty or so trucks that were parked there, and tried to get his thoughts in order. He'd come here to think about Kyle, to think about what he was supposed to do about him, but he hadn't reckoned with having to explain him to Sally. Sensing her impatience, Jared turned to face her. Her eyes were dancing with both excitement and expectation, and Jared's stomach sank because he was going to disappoint her.
Bringing Him Home Page 10