Out of sheer exhaustion I lie on the bed. With my hips in the air, I pull the tight fitting undergarment up my hips and butt. In that moment, when my hips are thrusting up, the snug fabric slowly riding up my hips, Luke walks in my room. “Sunshine, what are you doing?” He’s laughing at me. Again, he catches me in another embarrassing moment. The one piece of clothing I swore I would never let a man see me in, and here I’m sweating on my bed, with this fabric barely around my hips, and my boyfriend walks in while I’m mid thrust, trying to get the thing over my ass.
“Luuuuuuke,” I whine, “you’re not supposed to see me like this…go…cover your eyes.” I sit up on the edge of the bed. As I stand up with the Spanx barely covering the object it needs to be covering
“Why are you putting on Spanx?”
I just look at him. “You know what Spanx are?” Completely baffled this hunk of a man knows what Spanx are.
“Baby, I do have a mother, two sisters, and a daughter. I probably know more feminine products than most guys.” Now I know I love him. This man didn’t even blink twice at what I was wearing.
“I want to wear a tight fitting dress. I need to hide some rolls,” I say as I look at the floor. I just lied to this man, the father of my soon to be child, and the man I’ve fallen in love with.
He helps pull up my Spanx in the back, and then helps me back into my dress. I can still see the baby bump, but Luke doesn’t even notice. “Damn, baby you look good in red.” I smile up at him and stand on my toes to give him a kiss.
“Thank you.” I say as I walk to the bathroom. “Give me twenty minutes to do my hair and makeup. Can you do me a favor and make sure the girls have their overnight bags by the door? They’re staying at Ella’s tonight. Her mom is watching them and Ella’s girls.” He winks at me and walks out the bedroom door. I finally take in a breath; I didn’t even realize I was holding it.
Thirty minutes later and we’re all out the door. Luke places the girls’ booster seats in his truck and loads them in their seats. I walk to the driveway to the sound of him whistling. “Kate, you look amazing,” he mutters to me as I walk to his side and give him a kiss in front of the girls. “Girls, doesn’t your momma look beautiful?”
The girls laugh and cheer. “Momma, you look like a princess,” Nicole chimes to me.
“Momma, you look like a movie star,” Julia proclaims.
“Thank you, love bugs!” I walk around his truck with Luke behind me. I’m wearing my black high heels, my sexy red dress. I blow dried my hair straight and really did up my makeup. I don’t think I’ve worn makeup since our first date. We drive to Ella’s, and drop off the girls. They were so excited to see Alexis and Brooke. Nina, Ella’s mom, has a night of activities planned for them. I gave her my cell number in case she needed me, and then Luke, Ella, Chris and I walked out. Chris and Ella were going to the beach after dinner for a weekend getaway, so we take our own vehicles.
We’re meeting Beth, Jacob, Olivia, and Mike at a restaurant across town on the lake. It’s small and intimate, and every seat has a beautiful view of the lake. We have a small, private room. We all meet and hug one another. Beth’s glowing; she’s due in over a month and half; Ella’s four months pregnant and the size of me. You can barely tell she is pregnant; it looks like she swallowed a golf ball. I look like I’ve swallowed a softball, which makes my nerves go into a frenzy sitting here, thinking I’m having twins again. We all find our seats and I pick one on the end, in case I need to run to the bathroom. There is one seat still open. “Beth who else is coming?” I ask as she sits to my left.
“Ethan’s in town, so he should be here soon.”
I smile at her. “Wow, that’s great.” Ethan is Beth’s older brother, who lives in North Carolina. I don’t think I have seen him since the wedding. Beth doesn’t go into detail about why he’s back visiting, so I shrug it off. Luke sits to my right and Ella sits next to Luke. I introduce Luke to everyone and we sit, making small talk.
The waitress comes to take our drink order. Luke orders me wine, and when I tell the waitress I just want water, he gives me a funny look. I whisper to him I didn’t think it was fair to drink when my friends couldn’t. Even though I know Olivia ordered herself a drink.
“Kate, have a drink. I don’t mind.” Beth says to me as she looks at the menu.
“No, it’s fine, I’m not in the mood for a drink.” My reason doesn’t seem to bother Luke. The waitress leaves and we continue talking. Ethan walks in towards Beth. She stands up and gives him a hug. He rubs her belly, and then walks to Jacob and they give each other a manly pat. Ethan is about to take his place next to Jacob when he looks over at Luke. “Luke Ashton?” Ethan questions his name.
Luke looks at Ethan then back to Beth. “Ethan and Elizabeth Parker…holy shit. I knew you looked familiar,” he booms as he points to Beth. Luke pushes his chair back, walks around the table, and shakes Ethan’s hand. Ethan looks a little taken back by Luke’s welcome. “Damn man, it’s been a long ass time. How long?” Luke asks.
“Ten plus years, I saw you when you came back from your first tour. How are you? How is Danika?” Ethan quietly asks.
“Dani is great, she’ll be eighteen next month and is in college. Damn, man, it’s so great to see you.” Luke pats Ethan on the shoulder before he walks back to his seat. Ethan slides into his chair and doesn’t look like his happy go lucky self. Either I’m just being a dumb blonde or my brain has been taken over by hormones. How do Luke and Ethan know each other from a decade ago?
“Can I just say I am blown away? What a small world? Katie, to think, your man’s little sister was dating my brother so many years ago. Could you imagine if you two met ten years ago?” Beth enthusiastically blurts out. Luke sits there and ponders on it.
“No, I can’t. We wouldn’t be who we are, or where we are right now. I wouldn’t have had my girls, and they are the best thing I’ve ever done. So, I’m pretty happy we met when we did, this was our time.” Looking to Luke, he just nods his head.
Beth is on a roll tonight. “Luke, how is Leah, where is she now? What does she do? Does she still dance? Does she…?” Good golly Miss Holly what the hell is she drinking.
Ethan cuts her off and asks, “So, Beth, have you decided on a name for the baby?” They aren’t finding out the sex. So we all have been on pins and needles trying to find out what the baby’s name will be.
“We have,” she says, loudly, for all to hear. She smiles to Jacob. He nods his head, saying it’s okay to tell everyone. “If it’s a boy, it will be Jacob Matthew after his daddy, but we will call him Jake. If it’s a girl, we’ll name her after Jacob’s mom, Madeleine Rose, and call her Maddie.” The room fills with claps and squeals. “We just felt since the other boys were named after men in their lives, the fourth boy should be named after an important man in his life.”
I clap my hands. “It’s a boy then, huh?”
She just shakes her head because she knows what I’m getting at. “No, Katie, we really don’t know what it is, even Jacob has no clue.”
“Even though I think it’s a girl.” Jacob spills. “What? She is just different this time around, especially her cravings. I’m a doctor, I notice these things.” He groans to us. “I can just picture a little girl with her daddy wrapped around her little finger, with three protective brothers. She will be a blessed little girl—”
“Either way I don’t care as long as our daughter has a friend to play with,” Ella slides in that last sentence. We all drop our jaws and look to Ella who is smiling. “Yep, we’re having another girl.” Poor Chris looks so outnumbered.
Beth asks, “So what will you name her?” Ella looks to Chris and they both laugh. “We’re still deciding. Chris thought it would be cute to name her a C name, since we have A and B so far. He picked Carly. This being another girl, I can’t think of another girl name, yet.”
“Luke has a daughter name Danika.” I say as I raise the water glass to my dry mouth. My two best friends look to me as if I gr
ew two heads and six eyes. I know I’m a shithead of a friend and have not filled them in with any of my latest news. Luke looks at me as if he thinks I’m embarrassed that he has a daughter. I don’t know if it’s the morning/evening sickness about to make an appearance, but I have a gut feeling this isn’t going to turn out right.
“Luke, we didn’t know you had a daughter. Obviously, Katie is leaving us out of her personal love life. Tell us about her.” Beth urges Luke to carry on.
He looks to me for help then explains, “Danika goes to UCF; she just started her freshman year and turns eighteen next month. She also just joined a sorority and works at the GAP in the mall. That’s about it.”
I jump in and include, “she’s beautiful and looks just like her father.” He places his hand on my thigh and rubs up and down smiling at me.
“You must have had her when you were a teenager?” Jacob barks out.
“Yeah, I was eighteen when she was born. Her mother and I dated for a while before I found out she was pregnant. She had the baby; I left for the Army. Few months into Danika’s life she didn’t want the baby, so she signed over her parental rights and I’ve been a single father since then, with the help of my parents. That’s about it.” Everyone looks at Luke with complete humbleness and admiration.
“That’s pretty impressive, man. You should be proud of yourself. I didn’t have my first child till I was thirty, and I was still fumbling with being a father. I can’t imagine being one at the age of eighteen. That’s amazing,” Michael says to Luke from the other side of the table.
“You just do what you have to do, but it does make you grow up.” Saved by the waitress, and Beth orders first then the waitress goes around the table. I’m last, and hearing what everyone is ordering is making my stomach roll. I usually get the seafood dishes when I’m here, but tonight I’m not digging the seafood. “Can I just get the pasta with the sauce on the side, no meat?”
Luke’s gaze is sympathetic. “Are you still sick?” he tries to say quietly, but my girls have ears.
“You’re sick, what’s wrong?” Of course, it’s Ella.
“Nothing, I’ve just been dealing with a stomach bug. I’m getting better, but I don’t want to chance it with a heavy meal,” Assuring them as I unravel my napkin and try to place it in my lap. Ella just gives me her stare, she reminds me of Roz from Monsters, Inc. She has the face, and I can already hear her quoting the line from the movie about how she’s always watching me. I can see the wheels spinning in that head of hers.
Conversation continues easily; the men are really intrigued by Luke, they have asked him about his job, his deployment to Iraq, and how did he survive puberty with a teenage daughter. Beth seems to be in her glory. I raise my water glass to propose a toast. “To my sister from another mister, I love you, and I couldn’t be happier for you and the life you lead. You are beyond beautiful inside and out. To think, this time two years ago, you pulled me into Jacob’s office to witness the most incredible miracle in life. The moment you were going to be a mom to three sons. Look at you today, still glowing and expecting another baby. You’re an incredible mom, wife, sister, and friend. I love you. Happy Birthday, Bethy!” We all say, “Cheers,” and clink our glasses. She and Jacob can’t keep their hands off of each other or their mouths. Technically, they’re still newlyweds. She and I have come so far over the years. To think we met at the age of six. We’ve gone through some battles and some glories together. I want to tell her I’m pregnant. I so wanted to put my two cents in about jumping on the pregnancy bandwagon. But, I need to have a serious long talk with Luke. We are so new to this, and it’s so damn early to bring a child into our relationship. We don’t even know everything about each other. I sympathize for my unborn child, and I sympathize for Luke and my stupidity.
The waitress, along with another waiter, brings out the trays of food. The smell is overwhelming. My nose is taking in the scent and telling my stomach to recoil. I place my hand over my nose and try to breathe in and out from my mouth. I gulp down my water, praying that something cold will still the acid that is sloshing around in my stomach. I look up and I see Ella’s big eyes on me. Oh Shit!! She smiles and shakes her head. Fuck, I know she knows, it’s must be her pregnant sixth sense, she can smell that I am pregnant. Hell, she is around pregnant ladies all day.
Beth ordered Salmon, Jacob ordered another fish dish covered in sauce, and Luke ordered a steak that could still moo. I’m sweating, trying to make myself not throw up. I quietly get up and tell Luke I need to use the restroom. I walk quickly, and, again, hug the porcelain bowl. When I’m finished, I wash my hands and rinse my mouth.
Walking back to the table, everyone is talking and eating. Luke asks if I am all right, and I just nod to him. I fork my pasta and dip just the tip of my fork into the sauce. I take a bite and my body has no interest in eating Italian tonight. I place the fork back down and drink the water. Ella keeps staring at me. Luke tries to shove potatoes at me, and I tell him no.
“What’s wrong with you? I think you need to see a doctor, Kate; this has been going on for a while. I’m worried about you.”
Ella, the weasel, snaps out, “We have one right here. I think he could diagnose her issue right away, huh, Jacob?” I look at Ella and if my eyes could shoot lasers to her, they would.
Jacob looks at me, takes in what I have been doing all night. “You running a fever?” He asks, but looks to Luke.
Luke bypasses me and says, “No, she has no fever, yet she is constantly sick.” Luke looks like he just solved the puzzle, and I just want to slide under the table and crawl out the back door.
“Kate, could you be pregnant?” Ella questions to all of us. All sixteen eyes are on me. I’m embarrassed and I feel terrible for not telling Luke. I place my napkin on the table, slide out of my chair, and excuse myself. I try to run, but my feet wouldn’t take me as fast as my brain was telling me to get out of there. I walk to the gardens that lead to the huge dock. I start to sob, knowing any minute Luke will be on my tail.
“Kate, wait a minute,” he calls, running towards me.
I stop and look at the ground; I can’t look at him. “Sunshine, please look at me.” Placing his finger under my chin, he raises my face so we can look at each other. I’m holding my breath so I don’t lose it to another sob fest. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you?” I close my eyes and nod my head. He moves his fingers, so my head can drop and pulls me into his body.
“I’m so sorry, Luke, I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t know how. I’m still wrapping my brain around it. I’m so sorry for messing this all up, for trapping you into another unplanned parenthood, for lying to you about getting into my Spanx. I’m so sorry.” I just sob even more.
He steps back, with his hands on my arms. He stares at me, waiting for our eyes to lock on one another. “Kate, I love you! I’ve loved you for so long. I think the moment I fell in love with you is when you accepted my scars and being a father; you didn’t even flinch at that fact. I’ve tried for so long to find the strength to tell you these three words. I. Love. You. Kate Caldwell. I’ve never said those words to another woman in my life. You bring out so many new and foreign feelings I’ve never experienced, but I want them all. I want them all right now. I love you, I love Julia and Nicole, and I love this baby,” he breathlessly says to me while rubbing my small bulge. Looking serious all of a sudden, he asks, “How far along?”
“I’m not sure, I just took the test three days ago. I was in denial that I was actually pregnant. I see my doctor Tuesday. I’m assuming seven, maybe eight weeks.”
“I’m coming to that appointment. I want to be there for every part from here on out, do you hear me?”
Even though it is dark and there is just the glow of garden lamps on, I can see his green eyes are burning with love, desire and want. “I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
He pulls me into his body again, his one hand at the nape of my neck and the other rubbing my lower back. “Marry me,” he mumbles into my
hair. I stand frozen, thinking he did not just propose. He steps back and looks into my eyes. “Marry me, Kate. I want nothing more than to marry you, be the husband that would worship you every damn day for the rest of your life, to be the father to our children.” I just look to him, lost and confused.
“Luke, I can’t marry you right now. I’m not saying won’t, just can’t now. What’s going on between us right now is what I went through with Keith. We didn’t know each other; we rushed everything and stopped getting to know one another. I don’t want to make the same mistake twice. Let’s just give this time, take it day by day.”
The man looks pissed and hurt. “I’m not fucking Keith, so don’t compare me to that asshole, Kate. I love you, and you just told me I’m going to be a father again; a wish that has only invaded my dreams at night. You’re giving me the life I’ve wanted for so damn long, and then you throw in my face you don’t want to make the same mistake again. Well, I’m here to tell you I’m not a mistake, this baby is not a mistake. We are right…perfect, and meant to be together. I’ll give you time, but sooner or later, you’ll realize we’re meant to have our forever.”
I walk to him and wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. “Luke, I have never known anything more than I know what I want with you. I know you are my other half. All I’m saying is since this baby flipped the order of how things go, let’s focus on the baby for now, and then we’ll plan for marriage. You and I never had a big wedding. A wedding we can tell our grandchildren about. I want a big, over the top wedding, and I certainly don’t want to do it pregnant. Plus, we have our daughters to think about. Throwing a baby and a wedding at all three would be too much, too fast. I love you, Luke Ashton, and I promise I will marry you…one day.”
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