by Ariel Bonin
Caren's eyes were wide as she raised her head. "Please don't tell anyone."
"Does Robert know?"
Caren shook her head. "I didn't want to worry him. I knew he wouldn't let us leave the ranch if he found out."
"You have to tell him."
"I will, soon…maybe tonight." Caren gazed at the other woman and when she spoke her voice was desperate. "We have to get to New Canaan. I was with Kelly when—" She hesitated and appeared to swallow the painful memory. "I can't…I won't die like that."
Lindsey wrapped Caren in a tight hug. The younger woman shook in her arms. "You're not going to die," she whispered at Caren's ear. "We'll get through this. You'll be okay."
Caren nodded, weakly returning the hug as tears lined her tired face.
Lindsey took a step back, but kept her hands on Caren's shoulders. Grinning, she said, "You and Robert are having a baby! I'm so happy for you. Congratulations."
The statement earned her a smile from Caren. "Thanks. I'm scared, but I'm more excited."
"I know Robert will be excited, too—once he gets over the shock of it," Lindsey said with a laugh.
As Caren agreed, Charlie strode up to them.
"We gotta go. The whole neighborhood's showin' up."
When they got outside, the rest of the group was already waiting in the vehicles. Nadie had gotten into the sedan with Jacob, displacing Lindsey. She looked to Charlie as Caren shot a turner by the truck and climbed in.
Charlie motioned to her and said, "Get in with Caren. Ana, you're with me."
As he and Ana got onto the motorcycle, Lindsey circled the truck, pulling out her gun again. With three carefully placed bullets she dropped the turners blocking her path, but more were closing in. Just when she began to panic, two bodies collapsed at her feet. Andrew stood outside of the sedan, his Beretta raised. She gave him a quick wave of thanks and he nodded.
Hurrying into the truck, Lindsey occupied the front seat. The moment she closed the door, Robert let off the brake and followed the other vehicles out of the parking lot.
"How'd you guys make out?" Lindsey asked Robert, referring to the fuel they'd collected.
He didn't look away from the road as he said, "All together we got maybe fifteen gallons."
"That's not bad." She observed the side of his face and smiled faintly. He was going to be a father and didn't know it. Even though Caren's pregnancy was an extra challenge for their journey, Lindsey knew Robert would be happy at the news.
Watching the scenery pass by, Lindsey reminisced about the moment she'd told Jared they were having a baby. She had many good memories of her husband, but, other than their wedding day, that one was the most joyful. She could imagine the elated look Robert would have on his face when he found out. Lindsey hoped maybe one day she'd get to share that same moment with Andrew, but was highly doubtful of it happening in their future.
Robert distracted her by reaching over and turning on the radio. An iPod plugged into the adapter started playing from the middle of a classic rock song.
"Do you mind?" he asked. Lindsey shook her head. "It was the only thing I could save from my Camaro…"
Lindsey held back a giggle. She felt bad for him, but at least he'd been able to keep the iPod. She really missed music. It was one of those things she took for granted before. Now she considered it a luxury.
"She's been sleeping a lot lately," Robert said, glancing at his wife in the backseat. Lindsey heard Caren snore softly and saw that Darius had his eyes closed as well. "I hope she's all right."
"I'm sure she is," Lindsey reassured him, not revealing the truth behind the woman's sudden fatigue. "We're all tired. Besides, it's not like this is the most exciting road trip we've all been on. I would suggest the license plate game, but there seems to be a lack of passing cars."
Robert laughed at her somewhat depressing joke. He was halfway through asking her a question when the song changed. The device must have been on shuffle, because the next song had nothing to do with the last. A dagger of remorse sank into her heart as she listened to the opening chords. Of all the songs in the world…
"Lindsey?" Robert had finished his question, but received no answer.
It was clear she wasn't listening.
Lindsey couldn't hide the anguish on her face. This had been her and Jared's wedding song. He used to sing it to her, badly, but it was the thought behind it that mattered. It never failed to bring a smile to her face—until today.
"Are you okay?"
Lindsey struggled to push down the tears, lodging them in her throat. "Can you change the song, please?" she managed.
Surprise replaced the worry in Robert's features. Evidently he hadn't noticed the song, but now understood. "I'm sorry," he said as he pressed a button on the steering wheel. An upbeat rhythm filled the cab. "Is this better?"
Lindsey nodded, but not before one drop of moisture fell down her cheek. With the sweep of her hand, she brushed it away and directed her gaze out the window once again.
_____
Andrew had a hard time keeping his eyes on the road. It was strange to be separated from Lindsey and he couldn't stop his eyes from wandering to the rearview mirror. It brought him some relief to see her in the front seat of the truck behind him, but he wished to have her in the seat next to him. After leaving the inside of the store, she appeared to be unharmed. However, he did notice a great deal of blood on her boots. He was anxious to talk to her and see for himself that she was okay.
About thirty minutes later, they reached their first obstacle. Six cars were jammed together in the middle of the road, but looked movable. The group parked their vehicles and got out to inspect the problem. Andrew went straight to Lindsey, wrapping his arms around her tightly. She rested her head against his shoulder and exhaled a breath into his neck.
"What happened, Linds?" Andrew whispered as he stroked a hand over her back. "I heard you fire your gun in the store."
She shrugged and stepped out of his embrace. "Turner caught me by surprise…that's all."
"But you're all right?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she answered dismissively.
Moving past him, Lindsey went over to see Jacob and Nadie. Andrew frowned as he watched her walk away. Why did she keep saying she was "fine"? Clearly, she was anything but.
"Hey, can I talk to you?" Robert said in a hushed voice next to Andrew.
The older man nodded and they relocated to stand behind the truck.
"What's going on?" Andrew waited with a knot in his gut.
Robert was tentative at first, but said, "Something happened in the truck."
The knot tightened a little more. "You mean, with Lindsey?"
"Yeah." Right off, Robert began speaking almost too fast for Andrew to keep up with him. "You see, it was really quiet in the truck so I started playing some music, thinking it would lighten the mood, ya know, and then we got talking about something. Next thing I know, I look over and she's crying—"
"Wait, Rob, slow down. Lindsey was crying?" Andrew asked, his hand raised between them.
"Well, not exactly. I think she had memories associated with the song that was playing, because she looked really upset and asked me to change it."
Andrew heaved out a sigh. What was he going to do about this? "Okay, thanks for letting me know."
He started to turn away, but Robert stopped him. "Don't tell her I said anything. I think she'd be embarrassed."
"Don't worry, I won't," Andrew responded, already deep in thought about his plan to make it up to her.
_____
Later on, Lindsey was back in the passenger seat of the sedan. She hadn't minded Robert's company at all, but was much happier to be sitting next to Andrew again. They chatted here and there, filling the silence with random observations. Zoey nodded off early on, bored with the monotonous landscape.
After a particularly long stretch of not talking, Andrew turned on the CD player.
Shit. Not this again
.
She was about to tell him that she wasn't in the mood for music right now, but the familiar beat of Bad Company's "Ready for Love" struck her speechless. Goose bumps broke out across her skin as she was instantly taken back to the party at the school. She and Andrew had shared their first kiss to this song.
Lindsey wondered if Robert told Andrew about the incident in the truck and assumed that he probably had. Her eyes drowned in a pool of unshed tears as she looked at the man next to her. He slid a meaningful glance in her direction. She felt like a softy for crying twice in one afternoon, but his romantic gesture touched her more than any spoken words.
With an adoring smile, she reached over and grasped Andrew's hand. He brought her palm to his lips and kissed it tenderly. Saying nothing, they continued to hold hands and enjoyed the rest of the song.
Chapter 2
Various shades of purple stretched across the sky as they reached the city limits of Dexter, Missouri. A snarl of abandoned vehicles hampered entrance to the city, but that wasn't a problem. They wouldn't be entering any cities—not after Lindsey's experience in St. Louis. The caravan came to a stop and they all got out slowly, stretching their stiff legs. Andrew met Nicholas, Robert and Charlie outside of his car as the former officer stretched a wrinkled map across the hood.
"Now where do we go?" Robert asked, cradling his shotgun.
Nicholas chewed on his bottom lip, bristling his faint mustache as he studied the various routes. "There's no way we're gettin' on 55. If we get down the road and that ends up being our only option, then maybe we'll consider it. All my previous experiences on interstates have turned into big clusterfucks." He shook his head, probably remembering one or two particular occasions. "No, I think we'd be best off jumping over and going south on 51. It runs parallel to the interstate, but would have fewer setbacks."
"Think we could shoot for someplace outside Memphis tomorrow?" Andrew proposed.
Nicholas shrugged his large shoulders. "I don't see why not. We covered a longer distance today."
"We need to start thinkin' about a place to stay. Got less than an hour of light left," Charlie said.
The men observed their surroundings, which weren't promising: a fire-ravaged mobile home, a glass business—too many windows—and a park. They had camping gear, but between turners and cold temperatures, it wasn't an ideal arrangement.
Andrew's watchful gaze passed over Lindsey and he found himself temporarily preoccupied. She had Jacob supported in one arm, with the other pointed upward at the dusky sky, where a crescent moon shone bright under wispy clouds. His son's eyes widened at the sight and Andrew smiled.
"Look, there's the moon…and over here you can see a star, oh, make that two. When it gets darker there will be a lot more," Lindsey said in a soft voice.
Andrew thought back to earlier as he admired the two of them. He'd seen the CDs from the school party in the center console of the sedan—someone must have stuck them in there afterward—and was struck with an idea. Instead of giving Lindsey some heartfelt speech or talking about their feelings, he thought it best to just play a song, their song. When he saw the tears shimmering in her eyes, he knew she understood the message.
I know you have a past, but you have a future with me.
Watching her now, he believed even more in their future. She was a natural with Jacob, treating the child as if he were her own. During the drive Andrew had found himself imagining their life in New Canaan. He was always telling the others not to get their hopes up, but was so desperate to settle down with Lindsey that he was falling victim to those same high hopes.
"What about there?" Robert said, gesturing over Charlie's shoulder. Andrew hadn't a clue what the man was talking about, but quickly remembered their current task—finding a place to sleep. He looked at the sign behind Charlie, which read: Quinn's Quilts.
"A quilt shop?" Charlie ground out.
Robert stared at him. "Yeah, why not? We could use some new blankets. Yours is so ratty it probably has fleas."
Charlie released a mocking laugh, while Nicholas clapped Robert on the back. "Not a bad idea, kid. Let's check it out."
_____
The quilt shop sat back from the road and wasn't visibly damaged in any way. Everyone believed these conditions worked in their favor, so they decided to stay. The outside of the building resembled a two-story garage, with the upstairs functioning as a studio apartment. The shop area itself was a reasonable size and filled the bottom floor. All former inhabitants were long gone, leaving behind rooms covered in a thick layer of dust.
Lindsey walked out onto the second floor balcony and was pleased to discover that the structure was sound. "I can keep watch here," she said to Andrew, who was standing opposite the agape sliding door.
"You're taking watch?" he asked, his expression a mixture of surprise and disappointment.
Lindsey nodded. "I'm overdue for a turn." And I'm afraid to sleep. Her nightmares from their last few nights at the ranch continued to haunt her. She couldn't handle one more dream as a murderer—she felt that weight enough during the day.
Unable to pick up on her inner fears, he said, "Okay, but you come get me if you need a break."
Gently she touched a hand to his rough cheek and her brown eyes softened. "Don't worry about me. Get some rest—you'll need it to chauffeur me around tomorrow."
Andrew smiled and pressed a brief kiss to her lips. He removed the assault rifle from his shoulder and passed it to her. She grasped the weapon in her hands, pointing it away to look through the scope. She'd seen Andrew with this gun on many occasions. If he trusted it to get the job done, then she felt safer already.
"Thanks," Lindsey whispered, lowering it.
After taking a seat against the wooden siding, which was beginning to flake its gray paint, a figure appeared on the balcony. Lindsey glanced up and saw the outline of Kat's pretty face. The woman sat down next to her and held out a bag of beef jerky.
"Hungry?" she asked.
Lindsey had forgotten about dinner, but at the mention of food, her stomach began to rumble. The biting, salty scent of jerky assaulted her nose and immediately her mouth watered. Reaching into the bag, she took a small handful and thanked the brunette.
They made small talk about the weather as clouds moved in, signaling rain. They also discussed the trip so far, but luckily it had been uneventful, therefore it was a short conversation. At some point in the middle of the night, when Lindsey was too tired to filter her thoughts, she brought up the incident in the kitchen.
"I know you hit on Andrew the other night."
Kat tensed and gave Lindsey a nervous look.
"I get it. Really, I do," Lindsey continued. "These long days are lonely, the nights even more so, and it's become practically impossible to find a decent man in these end times—decent being a loose term."
"You and I both know that Andrew is as decent as they come," Kat responded. "I'm not ashamed to admit that I've never been turned down by a man, but Andrew…you must really have some kind of hold on him, because he barely gave me the time of day. Don't get me wrong, he was polite about the whole thing. I just, I don't know…I had to try."
"It's fine." Then, turning her gaze to the other woman, Lindsey said without blinking, "Just don't do it again."
Kat nodded once. They stared out at the night sky as a cold rain began to pitter-patter on the awning above them and rustle the trees. The rich smell of pine needles filled the air and Lindsey breathed it in.
Well, this should make things a little more difficult. She exhaled. Blind and now deaf.
Somewhere close to dawn, Lindsey could see shadows drifting between the trees. She rubbed her bleary eyes and squinted through the waning darkness. The shadows multiplied. Nudging Kat, Lindsey directed her attention to the shapes below the balcony. There were at least ten turners wandering aimlessly. Kat leaned close to whisper to Lindsey, "I don't think they know we're here. If we stay quiet, they'll probably move on."
A moment l
ater, almost as if on cue, Jacob's penetrating cry erupted from inside.
"Shit," Lindsey growled, springing to her feet. More turners emerged from the surrounding woods and she took aim. "Kat, use your handgun to take out the closest ones. I'll get those further out."
They opened fire. Lindsey took her time gauging each headshot. Kat ejected her empty magazine and slapped in a new one. The sliding door flew open and Nicholas hurried out onto the balcony.
"What the hell is goin' on out here?" he thundered over the barrage of gunfire.
"What the hell is goin' on in there?" Kat said, dropping a nearby corpse with a bullet between its eyes.
Lindsey glanced away from her scope for an instant. "Is Jake okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, he's good. It seems we've worn out our welcome. You mind covering us while we load up the vehicles?" Nicholas asked the two women. They agreed.
Quickly, Lindsey reloaded and cleared a path to the sedan. Andrew covered Nadie so she could get Jacob into the car. A severely decomposed turner stumbled toward Andrew as he focused on a sudden assault from the opposite direction. Lindsey got the turner in her sights, but her shot was off, striking it in the throat. She got ready to try again, but the round jammed and she fought to clear it. The turner was getting too close, so she forgot the rifle and pulled out her Glock. The handgun could make a shot at this distance, but it lacked accuracy. Right as the turner reached out for Andrew, Lindsey fired and got her mark. The cadaver fell against Andrew and he shoved it backward. When he saw that it was dead, he looked up at Lindsey and gave her a slight wave, just as she'd done the day before.
Lindsey's hand trembled as she returned the gesture. Tired didn't even begin to cover how she felt right now and, because of it, she'd gotten sloppy. One more second and Andrew would've been missing part of his neck. As much as she was avoiding it, she needed sleep. Nightmares or not, the group was relying on her to stay sharp; she couldn't let them down.
Picking up the rifle, she and Kat slipped back into the house, ran downstairs and out through the front door. Charlie and Nadie were already taking off on the motorcycle. Kat climbed into the Humvee, while Lindsey slid into the passenger seat of the sedan. Andrew smiled at her.