While a part of her knew she shouldn’t ask a question she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer to, she did anyway. Noah had liked it. She’d gotten up early to make sure she got to the coffee shop on time for her six o’clock start, and when she’d returned to the bedroom after her shower, he’d been propped up against the headboard with the paper beside him and a smile on his face.
Then, because he’d insisted on showing her just how much he liked the piece, he’d almost made her late. A small smile twitched on her lips. Being late would have been totally worth it.
But then Noah was predisposed to like her work. Marissa was not.
“It was good.” The half smile on Marissa’s face bloomed into a full one. “Really good.”
Sabrina’s breath caught in her chest and her smile matched Marissa’s. She might have pinched herself if she didn’t know how small-town and hokey it would make her look. “Thank you. That means a lot.”
Marissa nodded and twisted her hands together. “I thought maybe we could have that coffee you mentioned?”
“Really?” And there she went again asking a question that had only one good answer. But then Marissa wouldn’t have asked as a joke, right? There had been no snide tone, no hidden meaning in the words. And Marissa had never been one for cruel pranks. Sabrina doubted that had changed in the preceding nine years. “What can I make you?”
Marissa ordered a plain latte, nonfat with no flavoring, and Sabrina set to work making a pair of them. She watched Marissa select the small enclave of cushioned chairs in the corner of the shop, the same ones she would have chosen. Anticipation knotted in her stomach and she wondered if she should have bothered with the second drink since her nerves might make all fluid intake an impossibility. Oh, well, it would give her hands something to do.
She accidentally splashed hot coffee on her hand when she added the milk too quickly, but on the plus side, she remembered to remove her apron and she was wearing her best jeans today. The ones that lifted her butt to heights it hadn’t known even when she’d been a teenager and drew a whistle from Noah when she put them on after he was finishing thanking her.
Her stomach got all soft and squishy when she thought of him. Actually, her entire body filled with that soft, squishy feeling. So she was almost relaxed when she carried the steaming cups over to Marissa and carefully set them on the low table.
Marissa picked her cup up and sipped, watching with the blue eyes Sabrina knew so well. But Marissa didn’t seem inclined to start the conversational ball rolling, so Sabrina did.
“I’m glad you came by.” She was. Though she still believed her time in town was temporary, she’d begun to feel isolated and alone. It wasn’t fair to turn to Noah for everything, and being so near Marissa, faced with all the wonderful memories they’d created in their youth, made her realize how much she’d missed their bond.
Marissa nodded again and put her cup down. She stared at the steaming contents for a moment before she spoke. “I feel like I might have been a bit hard on you.” She raised her gaze to meet Sabrina’s. “I was wrong to tell Noah not to give you the interview.”
“He never mentioned that to me.” It made sense, of course. Marissa had been hurt by what Sabrina had written once long ago; obviously she would advise anyone else to avoid putting themselves in the same situation. She swallowed against the nerves that clawed at her throat. Marissa had said she was wrong. She hadn’t come here to lay down threats, idle or otherwise.
“No, he wouldn’t.” Marissa swept her hair back. “But it was unfair of me. It’s just...your being here brings up a lot of old feelings.”
Sabrina knew that. She felt them, too. She put her cup down and her fingers curled into the seat cushion. “But they’re not all bad feelings. We were best friends once.”
Marissa sighed and leaned back against the chair. Her lashes fluttered down, stayed down as though it was easier to speak if she didn’t have to look at Sabrina. “Best friends,” Marissa repeated. “I haven’t thought about it in a long time, but when you came back and then wanted to interview Noah, it scared me.”
“I understand.” She did. In Marissa’s position, she’d have been a lot more vocal about it.
“And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to punish you.”
Sabrina understood that urge, too. If only Marissa knew just how Sabrina had already brought down swift and severe retribution on herself. Big Daddy still refused all contact and her editor had sent her an even more terse email last week stating that unless Sabrina had something newsworthy to share with him, he’d appreciate if she stopped filling up his in-box and voice mail.
But Marissa didn’t know. No one except Noah knew. She paused. Maybe her reason for coming back didn’t matter any longer. “You know why I’m back? I got fired.”
Marissa’s mouth fell open. “No.”
“Yes. For an article I wrote.” When Marissa’s eyebrows shot up, Sabrina nodded. “Fitting, right? Guess I didn’t learn anything.”
“What happened?” Marissa looked more curious than gleeful and the tight grip of fear holding Sabrina’s heart eased.
She proceeded to spill all the details of her life since her January dismissal right down to the fact that her return was starting to look less and less likely. “Not quite the fabulous city life I wanted you all to believe I led.”
“Why are you telling me all this?” Marissa asked. “Aren’t you afraid I’ll tell people?”
The thought of everyone staring at her, knowing she was back with her tail between her legs as opposed to just having a summer visit, made Sabrina feel hot and cold all over. But she wouldn’t ask Marissa to keep it to herself. “I think you deserve to know.”
Marissa sighed. “I won’t say anything.”
“Riss...” She could remember sitting across from Marissa and Kyle, hearing that they were getting married and having a baby. Her best friend and her ex. The betrayal had felt absolute. And her friendly article turned ugly. “I’m so sorry. If I could go back, I’d never write that stupid article. I don’t blame you for hating me.”
“I don’t hate you. I’m here now, aren’t I?” Marissa had a point.
“I’m still sorry.”
“Me, too.” Marissa tilted her head. Her blond hair fell across her shoulder, as pale as it had been when they were kids. Then she smiled and Sabrina had the sense that everything was going to be okay.
Even if she was still without her job and stuck in this little town.
* * *
SABRINA ALMOST CHOKED on the tea the salon receptionist had made for her when Marissa dropped her little bomb. “Are you in love with Noah?”
She’d thought they were just going out for a girls’ afternoon. Getting their nails done, chatting about their lives, sipping tea. She hadn’t realized there was something else to Marissa’s invitation.
They’d been spending more and more time together since their conversation at the coffee shop three weeks ago. Sabrina had become a regular guest at the family’s Sunday dinner and had even hosted a dinner party at her own apartment. Some of that old closeness was back and now that she had it, Sabrina knew she’d never let it go. Not even if it meant discussing something she was doing her best not to think about at all.
“Marissa.” Sabrina tried to laugh but the sound choked her more than the tea had and she ended up coughing instead. “I barely know him.” Though that felt like a lie. While it was true they’d had little contact when they were younger and she’d only been back in town a few months, the connection felt deeper, stronger than the length of time would indicate. But how did she say that to Marissa when she could barely think it to herself?
“You are.” Marissa nodded. “Good. I didn’t want Noah to be alone out there.”
“Alone out where?” What was Marissa talking about? Sabrina shoved the obvious response out
of her mind. Ridiculous. She didn’t love Noah and he didn’t love her. But her legs tingled and her breath bottled up in her chest.
“Out in Loveland.” Marissa spun the rack of nail polish colors before selecting a hot pink. “It’s good that you’re in it together.”
“We’re not—” Sabrina broke off before she finished her sentence. Together. Because they were together. Just not the way Marissa thought.
Marissa’s eyes zeroed in on her, pinned her in place. “Don’t try to deny it. I know it’s true.”
But was it? Sabrina cared for Noah, but love? That was so huge, monumental. The kind of thing a person changed her life for. Moved for. Fear tangled in Sabrina’s stomach. She wasn’t sure she was ready to give up that flashy, big-city life. “I’m still working to get my old job back. When I do, I’ll be leaving.”
Marissa didn’t stiffen in defense of her brother-in-law. She didn’t straighten up or point her finger or do anything that might showcase the disappointment Sabrina feared her statement would create. She simply smiled. “That’s what you think.”
Sabrina didn’t say anything. Wasn’t sure what she could say. Because that active, anxious part of her that kept her on the move in the city, always on the chase, hunting the next interview, the next new nightclub, the next tropical vacation had quieted in the past few weeks. As though she no longer needed to find that elusive something.
But that was simply complacency. It wasn’t because she was actually considering what living here permanently might be like. It was because there was nothing to find in Wheaton. What were the town’s breaking news items? That the high school was buying new athletic uniforms for the start of September? Woo.
“Riss, I’m happy to be back now. But I’m not staying. I can’t.” Sabrina pretended to look at the nail polish bottles lined up in front of her, but it was a just a blur of colors. A rainbow of indecision. Her insides felt more snarled than her hair after prom when she’d used a can of hairspray and Marissa had backcombed it for at least twenty minutes to get enough height.
She felt Marissa’s eyes on her, and not a casual, just-checking-things-out look. No, this was a hardcore stare, one intended to see down deep into the heart of things. “How does Noah feel about that?”
Sabrina wanted to draw back from the thought. They’d talked about her leaving. Just because they were now dating didn’t mean anything would change. He knew that, right? But her fingers holding the tea cup went numb. Sabrina could see the handle in her hand, knew the ceramic was hard and cool, but she felt nothing. She faced her oldest friend. “I don’t know.”
Sabrina almost couldn’t breathe as the possibility washed through her. Stay here? Remain in the small town she’d been so eager to leave and in no hurry to return to? Never go back to the city lights? Give up on all those dreams she’d had?
Even if there were things she liked about small-town living like knowing everyone who came into the coffee shop and greeting them by name. Not just the regulars, either, but the ones who only came in occasionally who asked how she was and truly wanted to know the answer. Not caring if her shoes were the latest style and cost hundreds of dollars. Not worrying that if she ate an extra carb, her skinny jeans would be too tight. Knowing that she had a place here. Even if it wasn’t the one she’d expected.
Marissa plucked another bottle out of the nail polish lineup and handed it to her. “This. It matches your boots.”
Since it did and Sabrina was just happy for the change of topic, she accepted the bottle and curled her fingers around the cool glass.
“I’m happy you’re back,” Marissa told her, and some of the feeling returned to Sabrina’s extremities. “I mean, it is a little weird to think about you and Kyle, but that was a long time ago.”
“A very long time ago.” Sabrina refrained from making a face or saying ew since she didn’t think Marissa would be particularly pleased to hear that the idea of being with Kyle made her cringe. “We were never that serious.”
Marissa lifted an eyebrow. “You were each other’s firsts. People don’t forget their firsts.”
“You think that Kyle and I—” Sabrina stopped talking before she ew-ed aloud this time. The idea that she would have done everything she had with Noah after having done the same with his brother was enough to make the single sip of tea she’d had come back up. Not that Kyle was a hideous beast—far from it. But the idea of sharing something so intimate with him was just wrong. “No, we never did that. Or it. Whatever.”
“Really?” Marissa’s eyebrows came together. “But what about that night you came back from the lake?”
Sabrina was confused. “What night at the lake?”
“You know—” Marissa waved a hand as though this was information Sabrina should have sitting at the front of her memory just ready to be accessed “—the one when you were supposed to be staying at my place. And you snuck out the window to meet Kyle so that you two could do it. When you came back your hair was all messed up and you wouldn’t tell me what happened, just that you’d had a good time.”
Sabrina started to laugh. She’d forgotten all about that night and with good reason. She and Kyle had gone up to the lake with the full intention of having sex. She’d been horribly nervous and not in a good, butterflies-in-the-stomach way. More in an afraid-she-was-going-to-regret-this kind of way.
But a mouse had run across the floor as soon as they walked in the cabin and Sabrina had used it as justification to head back outside and tell Kyle, who hated rodents as much as she did, that she wasn’t going back in until he found the mouse and got rid of it. He’d told her there was no way he was touching that thing and that it wouldn’t climb into bed with them, but he hadn’t pushed very hard. At a stand-off, they’d decided they were no longer in the mood and come home.
Personally, Sabrina thought he’d been looking for a way out as much as she had.
“So why didn’t you tell me?” Marissa wanted to know when Sabrina explained.
“I don’t know. I probably wanted you to think we had done it. I was embarrassed. I’d been bragging about how adult I was and then I chickened out. The mouse was just an excuse. I didn’t want to have sex with Kyle.”
“You really didn’t sleep together?”
Sabrina shook her head. “No. I lost my virginity on a single bed in my dorm room second year of university with a party going on in the lounge downstairs. There were vanilla candles and cheap wine. Very romantic.”
“I lost mine in Kyle’s bedroom. With his poster of Jaromir Jagr looking down at us.”
Sabrina snickered. “Okay, you win.”
Marissa laughed, too. “You can never tell anyone that. It’s so cliché.”
“I won’t say anything,” Sabrina assured her. “Whatever you tell me doesn’t leave this salon. It’ll be like Vegas.” Since the nail techs were busy with other customers on the opposite side of the store and there was no one else waiting—even the receptionist was away from her desk—Sabrina felt safe is thinking that whatever happened in the salon would stay in the salon.
“You know, I’ve never even been to Vegas?”
“Oh. Well, it’s not as great as people say.” Sabrina knew that had to be true for some people. Had to be just based on the laws of averages. Someone, somewhere hated Vegas. And they likely had a bunch of compatriots. But her? She loved it. And Marissa would, too. “It’s not like you can’t go. We’ll plan a girls’ trip. It’s more fun without men anyway.”
The idea caused a fluttery sensation in her stomach. She’d love to go with Marissa to Vegas. The fun and trouble they could find...
“I have the kids.”
“So leave them with their dad and uncle.” Sabrina thought of how happy Noah would be to learn that she’d volunteered him for the job so that she and Marissa could go on vacation. And then she smiled, thinking of all the ways she’d find to ma
ke it up to him.
A lightness Sabrina hadn’t known she was missing began to fill her. It was different than the way she felt with Noah. With him it was strong and steady, a slow-burning heat that would keep her safe. This was thinner, a loosening of old emotions and regrets that floated away into the summer day.
“But you’re not staying,” Marissa pointed out.
The lightness flashed out, like a shooting star at the end of its arc. Sabrina brushed the dribble of uncertainty away, determined not to let anything spoil the day. “We can still go. You can fly into Vancouver first and we’ll have some fun in the city. Or we can just meet in Vegas.”
“Or you could just stay here and we could go together.”
Sabrina pressed her lips together and was grateful when the receptionist returned and took them to a pair of unoccupied stations just far enough apart that they’d have to share their entire conversation with the room if they wanted to continue.
She crushed the flutter of possibility rising within her. That secret part that sighed about how wonderful it would be to come home to Noah every night. As she’d told Marissa, they barely knew each other so any fantasy about a future was ridiculous.
Sabrina ignored the niggling reminder that every relationship had to start somewhere, relied on two people making concessions because it was more important to be together. This was different.
Now, if Noah came back with her, moved to Vancouver, she could see them staying together. But he wouldn’t. He was tied to this town as firmly as the signage that welcomed tourists and residents alike.
Just like she was tied to the city. Right?
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
NOAH WAS IN HIS dealership office, number crunching the business’s budget when Sabrina breezed in looking as fresh as the summer day outside. Warmth filled him the way it always did when she appeared.
This Just In... (Harlequin Superromance) Page 16