by Cindi Madsen
“Think they’ll forgive me for being so stupid the past few weeks?”
“Only the past few weeks?”
I smacked his chest, and he laughed and pulled me in for another kiss. He was definitely holding back, though, and I couldn’t wait until we were alone later tonight, just me and him, no one listening in. To think of that happening every night for the rest of our lives…
I waited for the hint of panic I’d have to shut down, but the only feelings the thought brought on were happiness and anticipation.
“Wait,” I said, placing my hands on his chest. “You never said yes to moving in with me. Which is fine. If it scares you, and you’d rather take it slower, I understand.”
A butterfly-inducing grin spread across his face. “I told you that you’re who I want and that I needed you and loved you in front of most of my family. You think I’d do all that and be scared to move in with you?”
“Well…” I shrugged. “Kind of. You’ve got your place, and I didn’t even ask before jumping in. Maybe it’s a good thing the bank said I needed someone to co-sign on the loan.” I slid my hands up and linked them behind his neck, bringing my body flush with his. “I just really love that house, and you and I put all that work into it, and I have so many good memories there, which is a bit unusual for me. And like I said, it’s where I fell in love with you. Where I picture us years from now.”
“Wow, Flash, you said that without even a hint of panic.”
“No more Flash. No more panic—except for the panic I feel over you not wanting to take a risk on us.”
“You and me? We’re not a risk, babe.” He enveloped me in his arms and squeezed me tight. “We’re a sure bet.”
“You think so?”
“I know so. Which is why we’re going to that bank tomorrow and buying our house, whatever it takes.”
I threw myself at him, kissing him with reckless abandon and letting happiness and love wash over me.
Until the loud throat-clearing.
“We’re all really happy for you,” Lucinda said, peeking through the doorway, and Velma and Savannah were beside her, wearing matching smiles. “Now why don’t we skip to the drinks portion of the night and give you a proper toast?”
I took that to mean they also forgave and accepted me the way I was, and that was when the dam finally broke and the tears burst free.
The next several minutes were a blur of hugging and toasting and being surrounded by more love than I dared to believe was possible.
I’d broken all my rules and fallen in love, and my heart still beat in my chest, fluttering and fully intact. I’d say something horribly cheesy, like the guy who’d fixed up a house with me had also fixed my heart along the way, despite my reiterating over and over that it wasn’t broken.
But I’d done enough in the way of admitting today, so I decided to curl closer to the guy who’d done the fixing and simply enjoy the happiness buoying me up to cloud nine level. And just so there was no mistake how I felt, and because being able to tell someone I cared about them without being scared was a new sensation for me, I tipped onto my toes, pressed my lips to his, and whispered, “I love you, Jackson Gamble.”
“I love you, too.” He deepened the kiss, clinging on to me like he was never going to let go, and I knew he wouldn’t. Not in the metaphorical sense, anyway.
Right there on the spot, I compiled a new list to ensure I enjoyed my very own happily-ever-after. (Someday I’d tell my best friend that I admitted its existence, and I was sure I’d never hear the end of it, but I had a feeling she already knew anyway.)
There was only one rule, one I swore I wouldn’t break.
# 1: Love fully, no matter what. It’s totally worth it.
Epilogue
I stepped over Black Widow, who’d camped out halfway down the staircase and wasn’t about to move for me. Then I hit the landing, nearly tripping over Loki, the trouble-making male kitten we’d kept because I’d turned into one of those girls with attachment issues.
The other three kittens had found happy homes as well, and Black Widow had been to the vet so she wouldn’t bring us any more surprise litters.
My heels echoed across the hardwood floor. “Jackson? Are you down here? We can’t be late or your sister, mother, and aunt will take turns killing us. And not to sound like a total diva, but I’m the only one who gets to threaten to murder you.”
Jackson walked out of the kitchen, a steaming cup of coffee in a to-go mug in one hand and a Cherry Coke in the other. “Which is why I come armed with caffeine. If you’re going to be stabbing me, I want you to be able to give it your all.”
“So considerate,” I said, taking the cold can. “I knew I moved in with you for a reason.”
“If you decide to forgo the stabbing, you should know that I’m good for more than providing caffeine. There’s banging, screwing, nailing…” He waggled his eyebrows, then his gaze traveled up and down my body, taking in the sherbet-pink bridesmaid dress that left my shoulders bare. “Damn, you look hot.” He moved closer, taking away the drink he’d just given me and setting it and his aside, then wrapping his arm around my waist as his lips met mine.
For a second, I forgot about the fact that I was going to be in a wedding in a couple of hours and got lost in kissing Jackson. The past three months of living in the house where we’d fallen in love had been amazing, and I fell a little more in love with him every day, regardless of ups and downs or the times he occasionally drove me crazy. I couldn’t believe how much I loved living with a dude, and I knew that had a lot to do with the dude.
He parted my lips with his, deepening the kiss as he walked me backward until my back met the wall.
“Jackson,” I warned, but it came out breathy and not nearly as stern as it needed to be. His lips moved to my neck, and I tipped my head to give him better access when I should have been shutting it down. “We don’t have time right now.”
“But this is my favorite wall, and you look really sexy.” He pressed me flatter to said wall, and the desire flooding my veins turned molten. “Even sexier with the blue-gray contrasting that bright dress.”
“A dress I’m wearing because I’m a bridesmaid at your sister’s wedding.”
He sighed. “Fine. But later tonight, you, me, and this wall have a standing appointment.” He nudged me with his elbow. “Get it. Standing.”
I rolled my eyes, but a laugh slipped out. We retrieved our drinks, and Jackson placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me out onto our porch, where he’d hung a swing I’d picked up at my new job and repurposed. I loved my job. Loved how it was always different, and all the varying types of furniture I came across in a day. The estate sales were like a peek into people’s lives, and there was something cool about taking their stuff and giving it a new life with new people who’d attach new memories to the pieces. Betty-Joe had also let me fix up her shop so the storefront drew more people in, and my pieces were selling really well.
The swing allowed Jackson and me to sit outside, enjoying the shade and gentle swaying as we talked about our respective days.
I also spent countless hours in the reading nook, and Jackson often came home, all deliciously dirty and covered in man glitter from work, and then the nook would turn into more than a reading spot—after drawing the shades of course.
Jackson opened the passenger door to his truck for me like a gentleman but smacked me on the ass like the Neanderthal he also was.
After he merged onto I85, he took my hand and laced his fingers with mine. “You nervous?”
I shook my head. “Nope. Just really happy for Savannah and Linc. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll be glad when the ceremony is done, but at least Savannah chose cute dresses”—I lifted one of the layers of chiffon on the skirt—“and it’s pretty sweet how excited she is. I remember this time when even optimistic, inspirational-quote-spouting Savannah doubted there was a Mr. Right for her, and I’m so happy she found him.”
I took in Jackson’s
profile and scooted a little closer. “I’m, uh, happy that I found mine too, for the record. Even though I was sure you didn’t exist for a very long time.”
Jackson lifted our entwined hands and kissed the back of mine. “Good thing I took all that time and effort convincing you that we were perfect for each other.”
“I think being delirious from all the fumes worked in your favor, too.”
“Hey, I’ll take it.”
A short drive later, we pulled up to his parents’ house. Before I could even climb out of the truck myself, Jackson was there to extend a hand. I think it showed great growth that I no longer refused help, whether or not I needed it.
The next couple hours were a blur of last-minute wedding stuff and keeping Savannah from crying and ruining her makeup and laughing and hugging and both of us crying and needing to touch up our makeup.
Right before we headed to line up for the ceremony, Savannah pulled me into a hug. “Thanks for everything, Ivy. I never would’ve gotten here without you.”
I squeezed her back. “Right back at you.”
“Love you.”
“Love you, too. And I think it’s time you passed the dating coach flame to me. Just for the ceremony.”
She grinned.
I gave her the same treatment she’d given me once, with a smack on the butt. “Now get out there and marry your Mr. Right, girl. You’ve been waiting forever for this moment.”
“I really have.” She took a step and then turned to me. “Um, actually, you have to go first.”
“Right.” I quickly rushed forward and lined up in my spot at the back of the aisle. Since Jackson was a groomsman, I’d jumped at pairing up with him. We walked down the aisle, together—whoa, not like that—and then took our places for the ceremony.
It was beautiful, there were tears—and I’m not saying whether or not some of them were mine—and the groom kissed the bride.
The crowd erupted in cheers, and then everyone transitioned to the tables for the reception. I was watching Savannah and Linc, grinning as they beamed at each other and kissed every five seconds.
Someone walked up behind me, and I turned, expecting Jackson.
Instead, I got Velma. Her attention was on the happy couple, but then she glanced at me.
“Yes,” I said, nice and firm.
Her forehead creased. “Yes, what?”
“Yes, I do want to be in love like that, and I am.”
There was something about Velma’s return grin that sent my nerve-endings on high alert. “Does that mean Lucinda and I can mention a future wedding? Maybe save some of the decorations from this one, just in case?”
I scanned the crowd for Jackson, finding him a couple of yards away, talking to one of his older uncles. He caught me staring and winked. Warmth flooded me, the love I felt for him radiating through my entire body. “Yeah,” I said to Velma. “Go crazy.”
I started toward Jackson but then noticed my mom near the back. I didn’t know why, but I hadn’t expected her to come. “Hi, Mom. Beautiful ceremony, wasn’t it?” A few months ago, I might’ve added a jab about not getting any ideas, but now I understood her better. Sure, I wouldn’t put up with a lot of what she did, and I didn’t think she had healthy relationships, but I understood now how you could get swept up in someone and think with your heart instead of your head.
“It was,” she said.
I glanced around, wondering if Stan had come along, but not wanting to ask.
“He’s not here. He and I…we broke up.”
“Oh, Mom. I’m so sorry.” My lungs deflated, and I looked her over for signs that might tell me how she was handling it, while crossing my fingers it wouldn’t be as bad as last time. “Are you okay?”
“It’s okay, I’m okay. It was about a month ago.”
A month? “But you didn’t call. Are you still living with him?”
“No. But I know you have your life with Jackson, so I called someone else.” She fiddled with the sleeve of her dress. “I called Dixie.”
My jaw dropped for a second before I forced it back into place. “Wow. So you guys are…talking?”
“We are. She’d mailed me an old scrapbook with a note that said she missed me, so when Stan and I started fighting again, I called her up. It was stilted at first, but then we got to talking like old times, and I realized how much I missed her, too. We talked about you as well, and I know I haven’t always been the best mother, but I’m gonna try to be better, even if it’s too late.”
For the second time today, tears rose to my eyes—okay, yes, I cried during the ceremony. I hugged my mom, and she hugged me back, and it was a bit awkward since we were out of practice, but it gave me hope that maybe someday, we’d be our version of okay.
The hand on my back made me turn, and Jackson slid his arm around my waist and tucked me next to him. He nodded at my mom. “Cora.”
“Hello, Jackson.” She dabbed at her eyes with an embroidered handkerchief and then flashed us a smile. “You kids have fun. I’m going to go give Savannah and Linc my best.” She walked through the crowd of people, and I curled closer to Jackson.
He kissed my temple. “You okay? That seemed like one of your better interactions with your mom.”
“It was, and I’m better than okay.” I gave him a quick recap, and when I noticed Lucinda and Aunt Velma pointing at us, eager grins on their faces, I patted his chest. “Fair warning, Velma asked me if she could mention a possible future wedding—as in yours and mine. And I told her to go crazy. Honestly, I figured they were going to do it anyway.”
Jackson’s fingers tightened on my hip. “But it won’t send you running?”
“Nope. No more running from you.”
“Good to know.” He dipped his head and kissed me. “So that means you’re…open to it? Someday?”
I slipped my arms around his waist and brushed my lips across his. “I’m not letting you get away, and I’ll do most anything to make sure you don’t.”
“Clearly, if you’re open to wedding talk.”
I laughed.
Then we were called over with a mild scolding for not being where we were supposed to be, with the rest of the wedding party. We ate and drank and ate and drank some more. There was music and toasts and dancing and cake.
Then my best friend was sent off on her honeymoon with the guy she loved, and I was finally left alone with my boyfriend. “Wanna go home?” he whispered in my ear.
Man, I loved that we shared a home. I nodded. “Yes, take me home.”
By the time we made it back, we were completely exhausted. I kicked off my shoes, ready to force my muscles to climb the stairs so I could flop into bed and never move again. But my two cats meowed at me like they were starving, since we’d fed them so long ago—or, you know, this morning. Not to mention the bowl of dry cat food that I’d filled before we left.
“I got it,” I said, going to feed the cats while Jackson went upstairs. I gave them some extra love, petting them as they ate so they didn’t feel neglected, and then made my way upstairs.
Right as I’d reached the top of what felt like Mount Everest, I remembered Jackson and I had a date with the wall in the living room, and while my muscles ached, the idea of that made other places ache, strong enough that desire overtook my exhaustion.
“I was promised some wall action,” I said as I pushed open the door to the bedroom, “so I hope you’re not too tired to deliv—” The last of my sentence dropped off as I noticed the lit candles around the room.
Jackson walked over to me, his tie off, his shirt undone at the top, exposing a few tempting inches of his chest. Then he dropped down on one knee and held up a ring. “Ivy Lynn Clarke—”
“Wow. When you said someday, you meant, like…now.”
“I’ve been carrying this ring around for weeks. I thought it might be a few more months before you’d be ready, but I love you, and I don’t want to wait.” He grabbed my hand. “I want to call you mine, and for me to be yours, and I
want to marry you. So will you? Marry me?”
I looked down at him, thought of the rest of our lives stretched out before us and spending those as husband and wife, and I couldn’t extend my ring finger fast enough. I nodded and said, “Yes, yes, yes,” excitement making me repeat the word a ridiculous amount of times, but I also wanted to show him there wasn’t an ounce of hesitation on my end. “I can’t believe that I’m going to get married. Me. Married.”
“Believe it, babe.” He stood and kissed me, then he boosted me into his arms. “Now what were you saying about that wall?”
As he carried me down the stairs, my excitement spiked even higher, and instead of my usual desire to slow everything down, I found myself wanting to hurry up and get married so we could spend the rest of our lives kissing and laughing and getting all riled-up arguing, and then making up after we lost our tempers and threatened to kill each other.
Oh, yeah. We were totally gonna nail this happily-ever-after thing.
Did you love this book from Entangled’s Amara imprint? Check out more of our titles here!
Don’t miss Cindi Madsen’s next book! Sign up for our newsletter here!
Acknowledgments
Some books are nice and easy to write, most are a little more roller-coastery, and some are hard. This one was hard. (Resists using romance writer brain to make an innuendo.) If it wasn’t for Gina Maxwell and Rebecca Yarros, I’m not sure I would’ve survived. For reals, you girls save me and keep me laughing and as sane as possible, and man I love you guys! Same goes to Evangeline Denmark, who talked me off a ledge one night and helped me come up with the “Go batshit crazy” rule, which is still my favorite of Ivy’s rules. Thanks to Stacy Abrams for seeing all the fiery potential between Ivy and Jackson and pushing me to make it bigger and better. That was when things stopped being so hard and started getting really fun.
Thanks to HGTV for making us all think we can flip houses, only to have harsh reawakenings when we’re elbow deep in paint, debris all around us, wondering if we’ll ever be able to use our kitchens again. My husband and I, along with our kiddos, did some renovating a few summers ago and it provided a little too much disasterous scenario inspirations, but we learned a lot and eventually, the madness ended. Mostly. Thanks also to my house for going the extra mile to provide inspiration, springing a leak in the ceiling in my newly remodeled family room while I was swamped with writing this book and behind deadline. Man, you know how to make a girl feel special—LOL.