by Lily Love
II
“But, what the hell is wrong with you girl?”
The evening at the Anderson’s was tense, as the family started to arrive and dinner would take much more time to prepare. As hard as she tried, Carrie could not keep focus on her duties-Anthony had absolutely possessed her mind.
She wondered if he was thinking about her too. If he really meant what he said!
The kitchen was not the most pleasant place in the world, but it was a closed circuit where she and Lady Anderson spent most of their days, talking and laughing to chase time away faster. More than an employer, for Carrie, Mrs. Anderson was a friend. In an unusual relationship for women of their age, she really enjoyed all the youth stories, heartbreaking loves and short adventures and accepted the smart advice of this elder widow.
In days like these, though, the kitchen was not so pleasant. With the family around, Carrie felt an unexplainable pressure which affected her work. She was not trusted, due to her perfect communication with the old lady, as relatives have problems accepting strangers, who are not strangers in the precise sense of the word. Since she felt more than respect for Mrs. Anderson, she accepted this fact with pain and a certain dose of fear.
Besides, there was an awful feeling that something huge is about to happen and she could not possibly prevent it.
As she set up the table, she noticed there were two more plates to be served. Unusual, she thought. Family gatherings were always narrowed to the ten closest people: The three daughters of Mrs. Anderson and their families. The tradition changed only on holidays, and today was not one of them.
Great, she is going to be embarrassed in front of people she didn’t even meet. Today was really not her day.
People started arriving and she sneaked behind the door to see who was coming. No one she didn’t know so far. She changed and quickly approached to serve drinks.
“Oh, Carrie. Please meet the children of my late friend Joshua, may God save his soul.”
Joshua, Carrie remembered, glancing at her uniform to check if everything was in order. More than a friend, Joshua was the platonic love of Lady Anderson. He had moved to Europe before she could even remember, but never stopped contacting his soulmate. Knowing the story, Carrie felt even more disgusted by Europe. The old continent that stole her happiness, and maybe the one Lady Anderson was entitled to.
Few years ago, Joshua had died in a car accident. Carrie thought her friend would never recover from it.
In the meanwhile, a sigh of disapproval, so strong you could almost touch it, flew around the room. This was a clear expression of how important Carrie was for Mrs. Anderson and how much the rest of the family disliked it.
“Why does she have to be officially introduced?”, the oldest daughter Sonia whispered to her husband.
As Carrie raised her head to see who she was about to meet, she felt paralyzed. Right in front of her, there was Anthony!
Was she dreaming, or was this really a game of coincidence? It felt almost like she lured destiny, by letting him walk through her mind the entire evening. The shock was so strong, she almost forgot they had a different role on that table-she was serving, and he was expecting to be served.
He was casually dressed this time. Probably, even more beautiful this way.
By the time he realized it was her, he was officially out of her league. She interpreted his amusement as a reaction of disappointment: the girl he girl he had an epic encounter with, was just a servant, with a messy hair and absolutely no make-up.
But at the end of the day, his reaction was quite normal.
“Oh, I think I met your …your assistant. Carrie, right? Nice to see you again.”
“The pleasure is mine sir”, she whispered.
“Oh, no sir, please, he laughed. I’m just few years older than you, for Christ sake. Meet my sister, Alexandra.”
His sister was short and a bit chubby, with a big smile that encouraged people. Just alike strangers you tend to trust, Carrie thought. Besides the same feeling they inspired, there was nothing more to indicate they belonged to the same family. In physical terms, they were completely different.
“Oh, Anthony, don’t tell me this is The Carrie. Sorry girl, my brother told me he met a girl today, and he was quite impressed”, she explained, while waving her hand, holding a long cigarette.
Laughter took over the room. Anthony told the story of how they met, and the logical result was the “oh, poor girl” reaction the family had saved for such “special” occasions. Is there an end to this shameful situation? She was desperate and tried to look for a drop of consolation in his eyes. He was indeed looking at her, and the look had the same spark as earlier that day. But how does a woman, offended by compassion, get to see that?
She moved slowly towards the kitchen, walking genuinely on the edge of despair. Lady Anderson did not understand what was going on. If she did, she would have helped her. , she was trying to calm herself down.
“Carrie!”, Mrs. Anderson called.
“Oh”, she gasped in relief.
“Don’t forget the ice girl!”
III
Coming to that house again was highly questionable at the moment. As vulnerable as she was, Carrie tended to interpret everything as an insult. The man she worshiped few minutes ago, was a confirmed douche bag, she wished she never met. In a position such as his, he could still not afford having fun of people.
Extremely pissed, Carrie collected all of her stuff, left an apology note to say she was feeling sick, and sneaked unnoticed through the back door.
At least, that’s what she thought.
On the slivered bench, where Mrs. Anderson read in the mornings, against all warnings that she could lose balance, there was Anthony again.
A little bit too shocking for one evening.
He was smoking, staring at the moon, and obviously waiting for her to appear.
What if she went back, slashed the door and didn’t give a damn? It was still not too late, she thought and observed the door in a dilemma.
“You know, I didn’t believe there was a thing like “common bias” for you, women. Until tonight. What are you going to do, run away again?”
Angriness pushed communication ahead.
“Sorry sir, I don’t understand your point. And..be careful with that bench, it’s not safe.”
“For you it seems like nothing is safe tonight, a? And please, again, don’t talk to me in such a polite way. I just wanted us to be friends and see…destiny brought us together, like it or not. “, he laughed.
“We could not be friends, Anthony.”
“See, you called me Anthony. I think we are on the right track. Now, call me Tony.”
She laughed against her will.
“I guess that’s what friends do also. Make each other laugh.”
“See? See? Come, sit. If we fall, at least we’re going to fall together. Like friends.”
They both laughed.
“Honestly, I don’t think we could ever be friends. I mean, you come from an entirely different class…”
“Oh, come on. It’s a bit too late to divide people in classes, don’t you think? And since when are you a lawgiver on human relations?”
“But…but you all laughed inside, and it make me realize I don’t belong there.”
“You obviously don’t girl. Neither do I. It’s a bunch of grannies and annoying children, what could two youngsters like us possibly do there.”, he laughed.
He put his hand on her leg and looked at her eyes with irresistible passion.
“Let me correct that mistake. You won’t regret it.”
She trembled as she felt him so close. The temptation to kiss those lips was so strong she could not possibly resist it. He moved so close, she could feel his breath on her skin. “Let’s go”, he whispered.
Comment less, she followed. She didn’t know who he actually was, or where he would take her. But there was either something about him that she could trust, or it was the painful
need to belong to someone. To be loved and possessed.
Was he about to use her? Was she about to look as an easy woman in his eyes? She didn’t want to think about it no more.
They got inside the car and drove into the darkness. He turned some old jazz on and put his hand on her knee, as he held the wheel.
“There is something magical about you girl. I felt it the very same moment I saw you.”
Oh, God. She felt shivers down her neck as she believed what a heart greedy for love always believes.
“Those blue eyes…It’s like I could see your soul through them. Some sadness you seem to feel. And it makes you even more pretty.”
“I…I like you too.”
As funny as it sounded, that was the only thing she remembered to say.
He smiled.
“I know girl. All of those panic reactions. It’s called chemistry.”
They stopped on the traffic light and waited for the green light to appear. In the meanwhile, she lifted her palm on his, and he understood another green light had already appeared.
He dragged her neck slowly towards his face and kissed her. A kiss with million drops of vanilla and cinnamon-that’s how sweet it tasted. For her, it was the moment she had expected for so long…she didn’t want it to be over. Never, ever!
“It’s true princess. Angels fall from the sky sometimes.”
He looked at her, serious and devoted to what he was saying.
Oh, God, how did I deserve such happiness? She thought over and over. Make me yours and never let me go, she wanted to say. But it was either the rush of the moment, or her mental blockade that didn’t allow her to say a single word.
The car lead them outside the city, where she many times wished to have been born. A small, peaceful lake surrounded by wild nature, promising a wonderful break from all everyday stress. As they drove, the car sauntered an uphill pathway, to a wonderful mansion above the shore. This must be the road to heaven, she hoped.
As a true gentleman, he opened the door and invited her out. The moment she stepped out to the uphill breeze, he hugged her and gave her a small kiss in the head.
“Welcome to the castle, princess.”
“Well, it certainly looks like a fairytale”, she glazed around with an obvious excitement. “You live here? Well, how amazing is that?”
“I do. And I am more than happy to show you around. In fact…”
But she interrupted him with a passionate kiss.
“Why did you come into my life Anthony?”, she smiled.
“People call it destiny. I call it “the call of love”.”
He took her hand and walked her into the amazing garden. Freshly cut grass, few well-positioned trees and a tastefully built fountain. From the very beginning, one could estimate he had come to the house of a well-standing family.
The mansion was valuably old, well-preserved and elegant, with a long stairwell and an ancient, wooden door. Beautiful and creepy at the same time, as Carrie was really looking forward to discover the secrets the place hid. There were definitely a lot of them.
He smiled at her delight and explained: “The house is a heritage from my father. He lived here when he was young, but moved soon to Europe, where I was born. It has been in the family for many years, so I could not resist the opportunity to come and see it. You see, for me it also a new situation, this one.”
She hugged him even stronger. For such a situated man, he was surprisingly modest and did not show off, as most rich men would do.
The fact that there were no servants explained the quietness and darkness of the place.
“It’s just me and my sister for now, he explained. And I would really like to form a family, with a lovely woman such as yourself. Nice household with lots of children to run around…”
“But you don’t even know me, Tony.”
“That is why I am her now. To know you better.”
For the hundredth time, it seemed too good to be true. She felt there was a mystery surrounding them, and nothing good could possibly come out of it, but for whatever it was-she was willing to risk it.
Really, what was the worst thing he could do? Take advantage of her? She was willing to let him do that without asking.
So, they walked around the mansion, holding hands on the moonlight and kissing each other from time to time. They tried to keep things calm, but even their casual moves revealed despair for belonging to each other. They knew that soon passion will take over their beings. And were craving for that moment.
She listened to the story of his life, but he avoided going into details. He explained that he spent his life in the United Kingdom, working at the successful insurance business his father owned, but after his father’s death, he decided to transfer the company’s management to the States and operate from there. His mother had died when he was very young, so he barely remembered her. However, he claimed that a fading image of her beauty interfered with his choice of women and that Carrie had the absolutely same blonde hair as she did.
In such emotional moment, Carrie wondered what she could share with him.
“My life is not interesting at all, I think you really don’t need to know anything about it…”
“That’s up to me to decide, isn’t it?”, he smiled
“Relax beauty, I don’t estimate people by their social status. Trust me, I know what lies inside that uniform you are wearing. And that is what I am interested at.”
Small drops slipped out of her eye and went straight to his palm.
“You know, I could not say I’ve been happy. At least not like I am now. I wish this was real and we could stay like this forever.”
“Girl, don’t be sad. I wish I could carry your lovely chick on my palm forever.”
“Do it. It keeps me warm.”
Soon, they approached a small height, at the corner of the magnificent metal fence. As they climbed, she completely opened her soul. Drowning in her own tears, she confessed him how difficult her life has been-growing up alone and fighting for survival, hoping that one day, her father would come and finally she would have someone of her own. It was not poorness, but loneliness that tore her soul apart.
The whole time he was quiet and showed only with small facial gestures that he understood what he was sharing with him. He did not ask her to stop crying, but gently wiped her tears instead. It seemed like her confessions invoked some old memories of his, memories that could be even more painful than he thought. Female intuition helped her realize he was drowning in unpleasant feelings, so she just turned and asked: “Tony, is everything all right?”
“Sorry girl, I’m just impressed by your strength. I wish I could have helped you somehow, but you’ve turned into an incredible woman, you should know that. From now on, you will never be alone. You will have me.”
Those words were sincere. The tone of his voice clearly indicated he intended to be there. For whatever reason, she felt she is not going to be without him.
The view from the height was astonishing. The moonlight drew an incredibly precise triangle above the lake’s surface, as were his hands around her waist.
“Do you like it?”, he asked and leaned with his chin on her tiny shoulders.
“I love it.”, she answered.
“You know…I never loved anyone sincerely. It was either not the time or more often, not the person. But I want a normal relationship and a normal life. Somebody who will genuinely be interested in me for who I am. I just want a chance with you.”
She turned and kissed his chick.
“That is exactly what I would like to experience.”
A passionate kiss followed. Wrapped around each other, they forgot about coldness, time, people…It was just the two of them and the epic moment of love at first sight, which seemed to exist, after all.
Desperate to make her his, he moved his hand towards her ass and started biting her neck in a rush.
“Hmm…”, she moved backwards and looked at him with fear in her eyes. I might
be going too fast, he thought. He took her hand and kissed it, apologizing.
“Sorry, I understand this might be too fast for you. It’s just that…I feel incredibly attracted to you.”
“I’m not sure if I could do it.”
“Don’t worry. I am not going to do anything you are not in for.”
He hugged her and they moved slowly towards the house.
“I think we deserve a fat dinner now, what do you think?”
She smiled, realizing she did not remember the last time she had something to eat.
“Now, that you mentioned it…we could.”
“I am warning you though, my cooking skills go as far as the ones of a child, but I can offer some sandwiches. “
They laughed.
“What if I …”
“No dear, no cooking for you tonight. You are my guest.”
Time just disappeared as they sat by the fireplace, laughing and touching each other like teenagers, completely enchanted by the pleasure of being next to each other. The more they got to know each other, the more they felt they’ve been together for ages.
“That’s what it means to meet the right one”, Carrie thought. In the meanwhile, many things were already wrong.
After the sandwiches, Tony proposed a bottle of old pinot noir. Carrie and alcohol were not in the best relationship, per say, but she was eager to try and celebrate the magic of that particular moment. In any case, she was already drunk by desire.
At the end, the bottle stood empty reflecting the shine of burning wood, as the flame of pinot noir was already gone. The strongest, however, was the flame within their bodies, which could no longer be sustained.
Without pulling his lips off hers, he gently took her in his arms and moved towards the bedroom. A spacey, vintage-furnished love-corner, with curtains surrounding the biggest bed she’d ever seen. The room needed some air though, or even a ray of sunshine inside. All there was at the moment were dust and pooled halt, but she noticed all of that just the following morning. Not even-that’s how happy she was about to be.
As he lied upon her, she closed the eyes and licked her lips in a seductive way. Until that moment, she was not aware of her sexiness and the boundaries her secret imagination could break. She curled under the pressure of his muscled arms, noticing how much he liked her. As he grabbed her, squeezing part by part, his breathing angered. He was turning into a beast, right there, over her fragile body.