by TL Travis
The waiter comes by to take our drink orders and recites the evening’s specials. David orders a Coke as did I and my parents order a bottle of wine. When the waiter returns with our drinks he asks if we are ready to order. While waiting for our food, the inquisition begins.
“So, what have you been up to since we last saw you, David?” my dad starts.
“My parents decided to home school me so we could spend more time together as a family.”
My father arched his brow. “That must have been tough for you, how were you able to graduate?”
“Actually, sir, I graduated early. I received high marks on my final exams which resulted in a full ride to the college of my choice.”
My father got this ‘deer in the headlights’ look. I have a mouthful of Coke, and it takes all I have not to shoot it out my nose.
Fortunately, our salads arrive, but David isn’t touching his. He keeps shifting the lettuce around on his plate. My father catches on. “Not much of a salad eater?”
David shrugs. “Not really, sir, a few bites of it and I’ve had my fill.”
My dad agrees, “I don’t care much for it either, but the older you get the more roughage you need.”
David smiles, but that grosses me out. For some reason, my father finds the look on my face to be quite humorous.
It is at this point I realize my mother has remained silent, staring at David, but my dad seems to be enjoying himself.
“Jess says you’re in Arizona visiting ASU. Have you decided if you’re going to accept their offer?”
David smiles. “Not yet, sir. I was hoping Jess could help me decide since she’s been doing so much research on colleges.” David winks and smiles at me, I feel my face flush.
My father swerves back around. “Jess, have you figured out what you’re going to do?”
“No Dad, not yet.” I haven’t thought about anything but David for the last month and a half, but I refuse to share that little tidbit with my father.
Note to self: remember to thank the waiter as he chooses that moment to deliver our food. I am so hungry that I scarf down my entire plate of baked ziti, but David still isn’t eating. I wonder if he isn’t feeling well. Thankfully, the rest of the evening is uneventful and goes by in a blur. Toward the end, David asks me, “Jess, it’s pretty early. Would you like to see a movie or something?”
He has me at ‘or something’.
“I would love to,” I say, focusing more on the ‘or’ option in my devious mind.
When the check comes my dad reaches for it, but David beat him to it. The look on my dad’s face is priceless as he never in a million years expected this.
He smiles. “Thank you for dinner, David. You two go have fun. David, it was nice seeing you.”
David responds the same and they shake hands. My idiot mother is still staring, so David tells her, “It was nice to see you again, Mrs. Cartright,” but all she can manage is a nod.
My father scowls, taking her by the hand and waving goodbye as he guides her to their car.
We get into David’s car and as I am fastening my seatbelt he asks, “It’s your night, Amor, where would you like to go?”
“Anywhere is fine as long as we’re together.” That is sappy but he kisses me anyways.
I apologize profusely for my feeble-minded mother’s behavior, but he brushes it off.
“Don’t worry about it. I thought the whole evening went well.”
I suppose he’s right, it could have been worse. She could have spoken.
“Are you feeling alright, David?” I ask.
My question surprises him. “Yes Jess, why do you ask?”
“You didn’t eat anything.”
He takes a deep breath. “Look Jess, we need to talk. Is it alright if we go to my house instead of going out?”
That line is never good, he’s probably going to dump me or tell me we’re moving too fast.
“Ya,” is the last word spoken during the drive.
He pulls into the garage and as I reach to open the door, he has it open. I know the look on my face is one of shock, but as I exit the car he draws me into his arms. “Not to worry, Amor. As long as we’re together everything will be fine.” He kisses my temple.
Well, I guess he’s not dumping me, but I still felt uneasy.
“Do you want something to drink, Jess?” he asks from the kitchen.
“No thanks,” I say, sitting down on the couch.
When he comes back he sits beside me, taking my hand in his. “We need to talk about our future.”
Where did that come from? That’s a little too quick for my liking. I mean, we’ve only been dating a few weeks.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“About college and whatnot. You know I came to Arizona to be with you. I need to get my business degree before returning to Bulgaria to take over the family business and I was wondering if you’ve made any decisions about what you are doing.”
Wow, that is a loaded question, so much to absorb. I wonder where he’s going with this.
“I’m not sure, but business would probably be a good start for me as well. Why do you ask?”
Suddenly, he appears nervous like he is about to ask me something monumental. “Because I’d like for us to attend college together.” He fidgets with his hands.
“Oh, that would be cool.” Going to school with someone I know will help ease the apprehension I have. His demeanor changes, prompting me to ask, “What’s wrong?”
Struggling to put his thoughts into words he sits there for a few moments. “I know we’ve only been dating for a short time, but I’ve loved you since the day we met and I don’t want to be without you.”
That is totally unexpected, especially considering the fact that a little while ago I thought he was going to dump me. The only people I’ve ever said, ‘I love you’ to have been my dad and my grandmother in DC. I don’t know how to react I mean; do I love him? I know when I thought he was going to break up with me it felt as though I couldn’t breathe, but is that love? I’ve never been in love so I don’t know if I feel it, let alone am ready to say it.
“Do you want to be with me, Jess?”
“Very much, I just didn’t know what to expect when you said we needed to talk. The first thought I had was you were breaking up with me.”
He laughs. “That’s not an option, Amor. I’m deeply committed to this relationship.”
Wow, this is getting a little too serious for me. “What colleges are you interested in? I haven’t checked any for business programs so which do you recommend? And I’ll need to obtain housing as well.”
“I’m leaning toward ASU so then I won’t have to move. But I would need to take night courses.”
Oh ya he probably works days. “That makes sense. I can probably change my work schedule to days as well. I guess I’ve never really asked, but where do you work?”
“Jess, there’s something I need to tell you. It won’t be easy for you to hear, let alone understand. I need you to promise me that you’ll hold all judgement until the end and you won’t freak out.”
Why is my heart racing and my head once again telling me to get the hell out of Dodge? I’m already freaking out and he hasn’t even said anything.
“Please, I need you to promise me.”
I nod ‘yes’, but evidently that wasn’t good enough because he insists, “I need you to say the words.”
“I promise.”
Erratically he paces, when he finally comes to a stop he is standing in front of me. “Remember when you asked if I was feeling okay because I didn’t eat?”
“Yes, why?”
“Have you noticed anything else different about me?” he pushes on.
I ponder his question. “Well, you have very light skin, but so do I. I don’t like the sun either,” I say, trying to justify my statement.
“No, not like you – I’m much lighter and you could say I’m more or less allergic to the sun.”
“Oh, t
hat makes sense,” I tell him.
“What else have you noticed, Jess?”
“I know that because of my work schedule we only see each other at night.”
Once again, he corrects me, “It isn’t only because of your work schedule. I can only go out at night.”
Where’s he going with this? He drinks a lot of red wine, only goes out at night. Right then his voice projects in my head.
“I don’t drink red wine and yes, this is really happening.”
He beats me to the punch. It is as though he reads my face perfectly, but wait — did he tell me that really freaking happened, that he is in my head answering for me?
Okay, now I’m starting to freak the fuck out. I jump and in an instant, he is beside me. How in the hell did he move so fast? He was just in front of the fireplace! Nerves cause me to stiffen and force the blood to rush from my head making me woozy. Everything is spinning out of control. He grabs my arm to steady me as we both think I am going down. Could what I am thinking be right?
As the word forms in my mind, he speaks aloud, “Vampire.”
AAAHHH what the fuck? I need to run as fast as I can and never look back, but I’m paralyzed, why is he doing this to me? I stand there like a puppet waiting for the puppeteer to work my strings. That’s it, I’m dead.
He whispers, “Amor, I would never hurt you or hold you against your will. We belong together, together for eternity.”
Great, what am I? His freaking meal ticket? A virgin to be sacrificed at some freaky Vampire wannabe ritual? This is so not good, he thinks he’s a Vampire.
“What?” is all that came out, it is as though I am unable to comprehend the English language. The world I’ve come to know and love is imploding. How can I ever love someone who thinks they are a fictional being? How did I miss the red flags? How did I let things get this far?
Before I can stop myself, I blurt, “You think you’re a frigging Vampire?”
He moves toward me and I take a step back, trapping myself between the couch and the ottoman, thus kicking my adrenaline into high gear. Sensing my unease, he stops, “Jess, please don’t be afraid of me. I need you to know that I won’t hurt you. It’s important to me that you understand what I’m telling you. I don’t want there to be any secrets between us.”
“Secrets? Why didn’t you tell me you were delusional and needed medication? You didn’t think that piece of information was important?”
This is something straight out of a horror movie or Bram Stoker’s dungeon. Everyone knows Vampires don’t exist. I find absolutely no humor in this situation. In fact, the more I think about it the more pissed I get. Why is he playing games with me?
Falling back on the couch, my head drops into my hands as I begin bawling uncontrollably. I start yelling at him, “Why are you doing this to me? Do you think it’s funny to play games and toy with my emotions? If you’re not mentally stable you shouldn’t be pursuing a relationship with anyone!”
“I’m not mentally unstable, nor am I toying with you. I would never lie to you. Think about it, Jess, you know it’s true.”
The images of last few weeks fast forward through my brain, incidents that I overlooked or tried to justify. The fact that I’ve never seen him eat, he’s never met me for lunch or anything during the day, he’s so pale that he makes me look tan and he’s Latino. His car windows and his house are crypt keeper dark. Oh God, did I just say crypt? Does he sleep in a coffin? This is way too much for me to handle.
Abruptly I stand, announcing, “I have to go, I need to go, I’m going!”
“I’ll take you home.”
“No, I’ll walk. I need to be alone.”
The sadness on his face is more than I can bear. I don’t know if I should hug him or run away. But what I do know is that I need to get away from him and be alone so I can think clearly. My mind is spinning and my judgment is clouded, it feels as though I am suffocating. I head straight for the door not looking back until I reach it. He is standing there beside the couch looking like a sad puppy. I leave, slamming the door behind me.
I have no idea where I am going, so I wander aimlessly around the neighborhood. Not considering the time or my whereabouts, but somehow manage to find my house. I run to my room collapsing on the bed and bursting into tears. My poor dogs stare at me, unsure of what to do, so I call them over and pett them, letting them know I am alright. Usually they make me feel so much better, but right now I’m not sure how to feel. Worst of all, I broke my promise to David, I did freak out and to make matters worse, I ran away like a chicken shit. Mental illness or not, he was confiding in me and I ran away.
My phone starts vibrating and I know it’s him. I can’t help but read the message, Jess, are you ok? Where are you? Please let me know, I need to know you’re okay.
I don’t respond. Back when I thought he was going to dump me, I felt sick to my stomach, now this ended up being so much worse than I ever could have imagined. Finally, I concede and text back: I’m home, please leave me alone and toss my phone to the side, crying myself to sleep.
Chapter 7
It is late afternoon when I wake, still feeling depressed and numb. This is a miserable way to be. More than anything, I despise the fact that a guy made me feel like this. I let him in and now I regret it. I’m still unable to comprehend what he said, A Vampire, I mean, what am I supposed to think. There’s no way it can be true.
Going downstairs to let the dogs out, I peek into the living room to see who is home, my dad is watching TV, but I don’t see my mother which is great because I’m not in any mood to deal with her. I walk through the living room telling my dad, “Good morning.”
“Good morning, honey,” he says without taking his focus away from the TV.
Perfect, because if he looked at me right now he’d see red swollen eyes from the ridiculous amount of crying I’ve done. I never even showered last night, just collapsed on my bed and I’m still wearing the same outfit I wore to dinner. I’ve got to pull myself together.
After showering, I scour my room for something to occupy my time with so I won’t dwell on the situation at hand. Since we started dating, I haven’t paid any attention to my chores so my room is a complete disaster with mounds of laundry. Separating the laundry, images of David’s sad face as I left last night overwhelm me, upsetting me far more than I thought it would. Picturing life without him chills me to the core. Slamming the laundry down I curse aloud, “Damnit Jess, you need to hear him out no matter how insane it sounds. You owe him that much.”
My stomach starts growling so I go downstairs to make a snack and ask my dad if he wants something, he does. I make us each a sandwich then go into the living room, handing him his and take a seat on the couch.
“Thanks for making lunch, Jess. When was the last time the two of us sat around together?”
“It’s been forever, Dad. Oh ya, I submitted my application to ASU this morning.”
His eyes light up. “That’s great, sweetie, what classes are you taking?”
“Just core for now, but I think I’m gonna go for a business degree.”
“Will you live at home then?”
I nod yes. He is ecstatic. At least I make my dad’s day because mine is sucking some serious ass. I grab both our empty plates, taking them to the kitchen and trot back upstairs.
Reaching for my iPod on the nightstand, I notice a new text from David.
Jess, can I see you tonight? Please?
It wasn’t right the way I stormed out, but by the same token, it wasn’t cool for him to drop a bomb like ‘oh ya by the way, I’m a Vampire, but it’s really no big deal’ on me. Ya it is, it’s a huge freaking deal.
Okay
Please come over as soon you can
Okay
I take my time getting ready, but all the while contemplate how to handle this. What did he expect my reaction to be? Did he really think I was going to be fine with all of this? I throw myself together and then head back downstairs, kiss my dad on t
he forehead telling him not to wait up.
He nods telling me to be careful.
When I arrive at his house, I sit in my car for a few minutes, collecting my thoughts. I try to pre-program my responses, but none of them sound any saner than his admission had been. Begrudgingly, I get out and walk to the door. He opens it before I depress the bell. I wonder if he saw me sitting there talking to myself. Great, he’s probably thinking I’m nuts too. Who am I kidding? He thinks he’s a freaking Vampire which makes me the only pseudo sane one in dysfunction junction.
Attitude in check, I walk inside. We act like total strangers, standing there staring at each other, neither knowing how to react. This just isn’t right, twenty-four hours ago I couldn’t imagine my life without him and now it’s come to this. I have to break the ice. “I’m sorry. I broke my promise and stormed out. It was an immature reaction.”
“Please don’t apologize. I understand that was a lot to take in.”
The tension is unbearable, the air so thick you can cut it with a knife. We have such chemistry, such passion. A bond I never thought possible. At that point, I make a mad dash for him hoping he will catch me, luckily he does. It feels so good to be back in his arms. The invisible wall is down so I promise myself I will hear him out with an open mind and be there for him however I can.
He suggests we move to the living room, carrying me all the way. Once we are both seated he asks, “Would you like something to eat?”
“Maybe after a while, we really need to figure this out.” I don’t think he expected me to jump right in, but I feel it’s best to get this over with.
“Thanks for coming over, I appreciate you giving me a chance to better explain. Jess, I never meant to hurt you.”
Deep down I know it’s true and when I face him his expression clearly reiterated that. I nod.