by Diana Seere
“I’d rather not ruin my clothing,” he explained, glancing at her over his shoulder with glittering blue eyes as his fingers worked the buttons. “Manny does enough laundering as it is.”
He flung off the shirt and turned, every muscle in his chest flexing. The trail of dark hair over his abdomen drew her eyes downward, where he grabbed his own belt, tore it open, unfastened his trousers, and let them fall.
Before she could take another breath, he dropped to his hands and knees—no, his paws, and there was the gray fur she dreamed about and the tail—he was shifting, right there before her, for her. The transformation of his face made her fear for his comfort—didn’t that hurt?—but she refused to show anything but calm acceptance on her face.
And love.
Lust and primal need shot through his blood faster than the speed of sound. Her demand—to shift!—was like being asked to undress in public, to walk naked through Buckingham Palace, to appear nude and singing the “Hallelujah Chorus” in the Budapest Opera House. To dance a jig in the Louvre.
Ludicrous.
And yet the order for vulnerability was one he could not deny her. If he had any hope for their future, he needed to comply. His human mind faded and left him with instinct. With each moment as a string of nows. With Lilah.
Her scent drove him mad.
Avoiding her eyes, he prowled, holding back. Mating with her in this state was impossible and barbaric. Even he knew this in the dim recesses of his wolf mind. His body pulsed, wanting to crawl back into human form to take her against the wall, in a chair, on the hard, shining marbled floor.
He looked into her eyes and saw shock. Intrigue. Confusion.
But not disgust.
His heart surged within, her scent changing from fear and worry to something he could not name. Remaining across the room, he walked slowly, with aching respect, knowing she could scream or faint at any moment.
Acceptance was what he needed. Not the blind deference of taming a mate but the complete surrender that comes from the deep understanding that untempered love is a form of fate.
“Gavin,” she said, breathless.
He looked up, eyes narrowing.
With an expression that hid nothing, she studied him, eyes roving over his body with the delighted look of a child on Christmas morning. Yet she was a mature, luscious woman with a core of strength and the soul of a fighter. Lilah was his. His, and only his, now and forever.
If she would have him.
She appeared to catalog him inch by inch, taking in his four, sturdy paws, the rippling muscles at his shoulder joints, the long lines of his neck leading up to his jaw. Her eyes never paused, instead in fluid motion, raking over him like a painter absorbing a subject so thoroughly to understand the essence. As time passed she began to nod to herself, a motion that coupled with her breath.
A tiny, melodic sound emerged from her and she bit her lower lip. Not a nervous gesture, but rather one of finality. A decision.
His own breath quickened.
She took one step. Another. Four more and she was within inches of him, standing tall, body quivering with something other than terror.
One shaking hand reached for his head. Staying in place, with his own body tightly humming from instinct, he let her touch him.
Stroke him.
Her hand buried deep in his fur, reaching for his skin underneath, fingers digging and grasping. She splayed her palms and dropped to one knee before him, now equal to him, eyes locked.
A low sound of pleasure vibrated deep in his throat.
She matched it.
“Thank you,” she said, the words unnecessary. Their connection was restored, and he heard what the words could not convey.
I’m yours, she continued. And then aloud: “Thank you for trusting me. For showing your true self. I hope you will give me the chance to show you mine.”
He rubbed his head against her hands, straining to touch every part of her, and he could not control what came next. Joints popped and shifted, his fur receded, the long lines of four legs becoming two, his blood diminishing from that feral sense of possibility to the muted logic of his human form.
Crouched before her, nude and all too raw, he lifted his hooded, human eyes.
Your turn, he said.
Obeying his soundless order, she stood, reaching her hands up, untying the straps that held the gorgeous black dress in place. The same fingers that had just communicated her want to him through his fur now unveiled Lilah in all her glory, naked and revealed, unleashed and untamed.
“You’ve seen me now,” he said.
“Yes.”
“Am I enough?” He would not let her look away, his eyes boring into her layer by layer, her body’s bareness a prelude to her true self.
“You might be too much,” she whispered.
“You’re free to leave.” His hands fisted and his heart shouted No no no and yet he meant his words. He would not stop her even if his soul shattered.
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“For the same reason you came after me, Gavin.”
The space between their bodies closed as they each stepped forward. She trembled when his fingers rested on her collarbone, tracing the fine, porcelain flesh that cried out for his lips. His tongue. His whole being.
“I came after you because there is no other. You are the One. You are the only one, now and forever. But you must accept me as I am. As I am now, in this form, and as I am in wolf form. There is no separation. Both are me.” His eyes urged her to say yes, but his heart held back. Lilah held a simple weapon that could destroy him.
Love.
Without her love he would live the rest of his life as a wretched, miserable beast, whether human or wolf. It would not matter. And in these seconds as she stared at him, unflinching and so ripe in the dim light, her skin like alabaster kissed with stardust, he let her hold his raw, beating heart in her hands.
She pressed her body against his and kissed him with aching tenderness on his cheek.
“Yes,” she whispered against his earlobe. “Oh yes, Gavin. You are my One. My only one, forever and always. Human, wolf, in life, and in the afterlife—I am yours.”
He slid his hands up her arms and cupped her face, her eyes dancing in the light, serious and joyful.
“Now show me what I need to do to make you mine,” she said solemnly.
Chapter 19
Lilah could feel the very moment when their earnest pledge to one another became something else, something hot and urgent. His hands on her face tightened, his gaze dropped to her mouth, and the tongue that had been declaring his love now slid across his lips in a long, moist stroke.
Desire swirled low in her belly. What was he going to do? Wild thoughts rushed through her mind. Would it be like her dream? She trembled, painfully aware of her nakedness and her need. There was a narrow sofa facing the fireplace—perhaps they would fit there together.
Her instincts told her they had to mate—that was the word that echoed in her mind—to seal their promise to each other, here and now. She could lie down and offer herself to him there, it was a lovely piece of antique furniture that would probably sell for more than her mother’s house—
With a sudden kiss, he lifted her off the ground and pulled her legs around his hips. She gasped into his mouth, shocked by his strength and the rough hands caressing her ass and thighs from behind. Instead of staggering to the table or the sofa, he held her effortlessly, his fingers demanding she spread herself wider, accept his penetrating touch.
She panted against his neck, almost embarrassed at how wet she was. But he groaned his approval, lifted her higher on his chest, and slid his fingers deep inside her. It was impossible, he was too strong, it wasn’t—
But then he released her and she slid down his body, crying his name just as he caught her and rolled with her on the floor. She was beneath him, crushed by his weight, but then he was hauling her on top of him, ravaging her mouth with his to
ngue, nipping at her lips, biting her shoulder until she cried out.
The sound of her voice seemed to drive him harder, for he bit her again, kissed the tender spot, and then rolled on top of her the other direction and dipped his head to suck her nipple into his demanding mouth. Their bodies were pressed against the sofa, and without breaking the suction of his kiss, he reached out and shoved the sofa off its legs, sending it crashing to its side.
“But it might break,” Lilah managed to say between groans, worried the noise might bring the others and a very unwelcome interruption.
His answer was to rake his teeth over her nipple. “How about you, Lilah?” His breath was hot on her skin. “Will you shatter for me?”
“Oh God, yes,” she gasped, arching her back. He took her offering, sucking her nipple hard into his mouth, making her nerves explode. Although he wasn’t touching her between her legs, she felt the beginning spiraling of an orgasm. “Gavin, now, I need you, don’t wait, please...”
“Yes, beg.” He licked the tip of her tortured breast before turning his attention to the other one. The smell of his hair drove her further into madness, and when he drew her other nipple between his teeth and rolled it there, licking and nibbling, she inhaled his scent and thought she just might come right here, right now, with only this.
“Oh, no you don’t.” He released the kiss and rolled her over once more so that she was on top, straddling him. The movement unbalanced a bronze floor lamp, which he grabbed and flung across the room before it could land on them. He was already pulling her head down to his when it struck the desk with the crash of bent metal, dented wood, broken glass.
She tried to care about the damage, the priceless antiques, the noise—but couldn’t. His wildness was driving her mad with lust. He was claiming her. Nothing else mattered. God, yes.
His fingers dug into her hips, lifting her in the air over his cock as his tongue drove between her teeth, tangling with hers in a hot, wet dance, demanding she abandon all resistance, open herself, let go. Looking down at him, she sucked in a breath from his lips and splayed her hands over his muscled chest, feeling the sweat and the power rippling over his skin, ready for him to take her, desperate to have him thrust deep inside her.
“Now, Gavin,” she cried. “Now!”
“You’re mine.”
“Yes!”
“And I’m yours,” he said.
“Yes, damn it,” she said between kisses, biting his lip, licking his face. Wild for him, she felt like she could do anything, become anything. More than human, more than woman. “Do it.”
With a wordless shout, he dropped her down, impaling her. He’d never felt so huge, so hard inside her. She closed her eyes and cried out her pleasure, unable and unwilling to hold anything back. While she braced herself on his muscled chest, stronger than she’d ever been, he lifted her hips up and down, controlling her rhythm to suit them both, faster and faster until she felt herself come so hard she was blinded by the pleasure and forgot her own name, her own face. Her soul touched heaven while her naughty body lay deep below on earth with him.
Where she belonged.
Gavin wasn’t quite sure which form he inhabited, and it really didn’t matter. As he panted, entwined in Lilah, all sleek heat and rushing blood, he felt completely integrated. Synthesized.
Whole.
Like butterflies with wings of steel, her heart fluttered in her chest against his ear. Her tantalizing juices were stretched across his lips, the carved out muscles of his hips, his thighs, as if she’d branded him with her scent and taste. If he could roll himself in her, he would. Perhaps that would come next, though he’d prefer a soft bed over the rug on the stone floor they currently occupied. He nuzzled his nose against the sweet spot of her neck, just below the hollow of her throat, and inhaled deeply. He was so far gone that he actually imagined he could smell shifter blood in her. Under his fingers, her long blonde hair felt thick as a wolf’s pelt.
Mine.
His muscled quads slid against her soft thighs, the contrast alluring.
“You make me feel as if my heart is too small, Lilah,” he murmured against her chest, pressing his head against it, letting his fingertips drag against the rosy pink of her nipple. It tightened, as if answering an unasked question.
“I love you so much, Gavin. I’m so sorry. I... When you changed at the ranch, when Webb attacked me, I ran away.” She sat up, and he reflexively lifted, seeking constant contact with her through touch and looks. “I didn’t know what to do. I’ve never... well... Wolves that change into humans are something in the movies, you know?”
He laughed softly, caressing her cheek with the back of his hand. “I know. To you, this is mysterious and frightening. To me, it’s all I know.” She smiled in response, and his heart grew. Maybe that was how this worked.
Love made your heart expand to contain all that you received from your soul mate.
If so, he needed a bigger universe.
Lilah’s long, blonde hair blended in with the long, shaggy strands of the thick carpet they rested on, stretched out naked before a roaring fire. If Gavin weren’t in the secret chambers of the Novo Club he would be more relaxed. Something in him prickled, though he tried to focus on the succulent soul mate in his arms.
“Is this a bearskin rug?” she asked. “No, it’s too light. Polar bear?”
Gavin laughed, a deep chuckle that warmed him. “Derry would kill us if we put a bearskin rug here.”
Shock covered her face, and she started. “Oh! He’s not a wolf? He’s a bear?”
Gavin nodded. It was strange to speak so freely about the family.
“Yes. And we would never hear the end of it from him and Sophia if we used a bearskin—”
She sat up suddenly. “Sophia?” she said in an incredulous voice.
Gavin pinched the bridge of his nose. Oh, boy. “Yes. Sophia. She’s our sister. Well, my half sister. She and Derry are full siblings.”
“You sent your sister to play nursemaid to my mother?” Lilah squeaked. Her lips parted in surprise, and he snatched a quick, tasty kiss.
“Yes. No. Not quite. It’s a long story.”
“Why would Sophia and Derry be upset by a bearskin— Ohhhh,” she said slowly. “They’re both bears?”
Gavin nodded.
She closed her eyes, took a few seconds, and then said, “I can see it now. They’re both big and powerful, my mom says Sophia is a ‘big girl,’ and they— Wait a minute.” Her eyes flew open. “And you and Asher are wolves?”
“Yes.”
Her head gave a little shake, and she laughed. “This is a lot to understand.”
“I can only imagine.” He stroked her arm as she thought, his eyes feasting on the glow of the firelight against her skin.
Her eyes met his. “Edward?”
“A mountain lion.”
“Your family is a regular zoo.”
A booming laugh came out of him, so loud she clapped a hand over his mouth. He nipped at it, then suckled her finger. She gave him a hot, sultry look that made him crave being in her again.
“I don’t understand. How can you all be different animals?”
“We share the same father but have different mothers. My father was married three times in his lifetime.” A weary sort of pain filled him. Explaining this to an outsider was surreal. He could only imagine how it seemed from her standpoint. And yet, he had no fear. No worry. Just an uneasy feeling.
“Your... your father was human, and all the wives were shifters?”
He chuckled. “I can see how that would seem to make sense, but no. Father was a wolf shifter. All three of his wives were humans. Shifter genetics is still quite complex. Recessive genes can come together to produce anomalies.”
“Bear, wolf, and mountain lion from the same male wolf shifter?” She tried to keep the incredulity out of her voice but wasn’t succeeding.
He shrugged with one shoulder. “Time and plenty of research money will help us to understand.�
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This was unbelievable.
“What... um, what kind of child might we... uh...” She blushed, her face turning to flame.
The brush of his fingers on her chin made her smile. “Might we produce? I do not know. He or she will appear to be human when born. The shift takes place later. When we learn the animal spirit.”
Appear to be human?
She shoved that thought aside and got back to an easier topic.
“You sent your own sister to take care of my mother, huh?”
“That was not my idea,” he said, bristling. “Sophia can be meddlesome.”
“My mother absolutely adores her.”
“Let’s hope your mother feels the same way toward me when we meet.”
Lilah’s face lit up like the sun. She kissed the end of his nose and flattened her hand against his chest, stroking the line of his pecs, down his breastbone, flat against his navel. He quickened, ready to be inside her again. To let go of this disturbance within.
She dipped her head down, long eyelashes dark against her pale skin. “Are you always in control? I-I have a lot of questions.” Lilah caught his eye and moved along his forearm, then squeezed his hand. “I hope you don’t mind.”
Blinking hard, he tried to contain his emotions. “Questions are fine. You should always ask. I’d rather answer an awkward question than see you flee out of fear.”
Her expression changed to a pained look. “I’m sorry.”
He held up a palm toward her. “No. No more apologies. I’m sorry, too, for my role in this. I should have trusted you.” He reached up and cradled her face in his hands, loving every second of this. Of access to her. Of just being together.
“Gavin, I—”
“Let me finish.”
She nodded, her hand running along the tight cords of his forearms, the stress and tension flooding his flesh as he struggled to say what he knew he needed to communicate.
“This is about more than love, Lilah. This is about trust. And a deep knowing of you. I want to know you. Possess you. I am yours now, and you are mine. My duty is to protect you. To cherish you. To adore and appreciate and to make you feel like the most beloved creature known throughout all time.”