Foolish

by Anna Black

  Her head started to feel dizzy, and she had to sit down. The baby was moving frantically, and it scared her, so she knew she had to calm down and take a breath. She moved out of his embrace and damn near fell onto the love seat. By the look of terror on Tracy’s face, she gathered he was finally listening.

  He knelt in front of her with tears in his eyes.

  She lifted a hand and caressed his cheek. “You have to stop, Tracy. I’m miserable, and you have to stop treating me like this.”

  “I want to, but I just don’t know how to stop. I don’t know how to trust a woman completely, and I hate who I am, Novey. I hate that I’m ruining this marriage. Baby, I’m so sorry. Please calm down, baby, and breathe. Take a deep breath,” he instructed.

  He ran and got her a glass of water, and she took a couple sips and wiped her face. She took several deep breaths and began to relax. She had to, for her baby’s sake.

  “I can’t do this anymore,” she whispered.

  Tracy went back to his knees in front of her. “Forgive me please, baby, please. I’m so fucking sorry, Novey. Please don’t leave me. I’m begging you not to leave me. I’m gonna get some help, baby. It’s not your fault. None of this is you; it’s me. Please, I swear to you on my life, I will change. Just don’t leave me,” he pleaded.

  November wanted to believe him, but she had heard that song before.

  “I never meant to hurt you,” he continued. “You gotta know that. You and my son are the only two things on this planet that I love more than anything. Please, Novey, I’m begging you.” He looked sincere, but she still wasn’t convinced. “I’ll do anything to save our marriage. I will get some help, I promise. Please, baby.” He put his head in her lap and sobbed.

  She hated that she loved him so much at that moment because she truly wanted to tell him to kick rocks. But she rubbed his head and breathed out a sigh, hoping he would do what he said this time.

  He looked up at November, and she wiped his tears. “Novey, I’ll give you your keys. From now on, you can go wherever you wanna go, whenever. No questions. I know you are loving and faithful, and I’m sorry. Can you please forgive me for being an insecure fool?” he asked.

  “Tracy, I love you, and I am trying to be patient because you are my husband and I want this marriage, but you’ve got to promise me that you are honest this time about getting some help. You’ve said this so many times before, and I can’t continue to be here for you and love you if you can’t do what you say you will do.

  “I’m gonna trust you again, and I have faith that our marriage is gonna be fine, but please be a man of your word. I’ve heard the ‘I’m gonna change’ speech too many times, and I am ready to walk away to be happy and never look back. Please do what you say,” she said looking into his eyes. She wanted him to know that it was time for him to get his shit together.

  “I hear you, Novey. I hear you. You’ll see. From here on out, things will be different,” he said and stood up. He went into the kitchen, reached over the fridge, and got her keys out of the hiding place he had them in. “Here, baby.” He came back and handed them to her. “Go out and get some air. Take all the time you need. I’ll be here waiting for you.” He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “I love you so much.”

  “Thank you,” she said, holding her keys tightly in her hand. She stood up and got her coat. She was serious about getting out of the house, and although they had talked, she was still leaving for a while. “I love you too,” she said and headed for the garage. He sat down on the sofa and didn’t try to stop her from leaving.

  The baby had finally stopped moving like crazy, and she felt better already. Relieved, she got into her Denali and let the seat back another notch. She hadn’t driven in a while, and she had grown more since the last time she drove. She cranked the engine and pushed the garage door opener. She sat there for a few moments waiting for the engine to warm up.

  It was May, but the weather was still cold. She slowly backed away, thinking her cell phone was gonna ring or he’d come running into the garage to stop her, but neither happened. She drove down the block and smiled and thanked God for answering her prayers to get through to Tracy. She jumped onto the expressway and headed to see her parents. She hadn’t seen them in a couple of months, and she knew they were going to be shocked to see how much bigger her belly had gotten.

  When she pulled into the driveway, she saw her sister’s SUV. She was happy because she hadn’t seen April in a couple weeks. The usual family roaring was coming from the kitchen, so she walked in.

  “Hello,” she said, smiling from ear to ear. It was so good seeing them.

  “Hey, sissy,” April said, hopping off the stool and hugging her.

  “Well, hello, stranger,” her daddy said.

  “Oh my goodness, look at you,” April said, helping her out of her coat.

  “Oh, my grandson sho’ gon’ be a big boy,” her mother said, giving her a big hug. “Where is Tracy?”

  “At the house. He was tired and on the couch napping. I was bored, so here I am,” November said.

  “Well, tell him we miss him too. Come on in and sit down. Let me fix you a plate,” her momma said.

  November took a seat next to April. She let her family fuss over her, and she enjoyed herself. To her surprise, her cell phone didn’t ring one time.

  Later in the evening, she was getting tired, so she got ready to head home. It had felt so good to get out to visit with her family that she smiled the entire ride home.

  Tracy’s Benz was in the garage, but his Infiniti was gone. She wondered where he was, but she didn’t panic. When she got inside, she called him. His voice mail picked up. A couple minutes went by and then he called her back.

  “Hey, baby,” she said softly.

  “Hey, my love. I see you made it in.”

  “Yeah, I got in about ten minutes ago. Where are you?” she asked for the first time. That question usually came out of his mouth.

  “On my way. I ran out to get a bite, but I’ll be there in about ten minutes. I will be honest, I was afraid you wouldn’t come home.”

  “If I wasn’t, I would have told you,” she said, going upstairs so she could undress. She was full and tired and couldn’t wait to get into bed.

  “Yeah, I guess, but I was scared. I won’t lie,” he confessed.

  “Well, I’m home,” she said, stepping out of her pants. “And I can’t wait until you get here. My lower back is killing me, and I need you to give me the magic,” she said, talking about a massage. Tracy was good at giving them.

  “I’m almost there, and when I get home, I’ll give you the magic, babe,” he said with a smile in his voice.

  “Oh, okay. Ouch,” she moaned. “Ooohhh,” she said and stood still.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I just had a . . . Ooohhh. Awwww, Tracy, something ain’t right.” She moaned again.

  “What is it, Novey?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe TJ didn’t like the spices in the food I had at Momma’s. Awwww. Oh, Tracy, I think my water just broke.” Warm liquid ran down her legs. Glad I’m in the bathroom, she thought distractedly. This would have made a mess of the carpet.

  “Hold on, baby, I’ll be right there,” Tracy said.

  “Baby, I need to call April. I don’t know what to do,” she cried.

  “Okay, but I’m on my way.”

  “Just hurry. I’m scared, Tracy,” she said, panicking. She hung up and dialed April.

  April tried to calm November down, but she was so scared and wouldn’t listen to April because her contractions started coming on strong and fast.

  Tracy was there within minutes, and he helped her put on a robe and her coat. He drove to the hospital holding her hand and telling her to relax, but it was hurting so bad she couldn’t get comfortable in the seat. She moaned and cussed the whole ride. By the time they got to the hospital, she was contracting every three minutes. It wasn’t long before little Tracy made his way into the world.

&nb
sp; “He is beautiful,” Tracy said, holding his newborn son.

  “Thank you,” November said jokingly.

  “What do you mean, thank you? I’m talking about the baby,” he joked back with her.

  “I know,” she said smiling.

  “I’m so happy right now, Novey. You did real good, baby. He is perfect. He looks just like you.”

  “You think so? I think he looks more like you.”

  “No, look at his eyes. He has your eyes.”

  “And the rest of him is you,” she said.

  They couldn’t stop smiling. This was the best day of their lives. November had had a major breakthrough with Tracy, and her son was born. She smiled to herself. I’m not doing too badly.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Going back to work was hard for November. She had been off for almost a year, and going back to the company was not what she really wanted to do. She wanted to venture into her own thing, but Tracy had insisted that, if she worked, she could only do part-time at the agency. Although he wanted her to be a full-time mom instead, he compromised by letting her go back part-time. She had a hard time leaving her baby, but she felt at ease because he went to April’s daycare center, so she knew he was in good hands.

  Tracy was busy with other avenues of business. He had opened an auto repair shop, and he was busy and gone most of the time. She was so proud of him because he was a changed man. Her cell phone calls from him were normal, and there were no more prison stories. She was finally living a normal life, and she was happy. Her little boy was going to turn six months old that November, and he was their joy.

  She had lost a few pounds and was actually a bit smaller than she was before she got pregnant, so she was on cloud nine. When she left the office, she called April to let her know she would be late. She wanted to stop by the grocery store to get a few items. When she was walking to her new Escalade, she got a weird feeling that someone was following her.

  She turned and saw a man a few feet away, so she loaded her bags as fast as she could and pulled out her cell phone to call Tracy so she could have someone on the phone in case the stranger was someone she should worry about. She wasn’t in the mood for anyone trying any funny business, so she wanted to let Tracy know exactly where she was, just in case she came up missing.

  She was disappointed when she got his voice mail, but she started talking like she was carrying on a conversation until she was safely inside her vehicle. She pulled out of the parking lot and took a deep breath, but she looked in her rearview mirror and could have sworn the same car was following her earlier. She drove to her sister’s and went inside. She was a bit shaken from the parking lot experience, so she sat and talked to April for a while before she left.

  At home, she put the baby in his swing and changed to start dinner. She cranked the music and poured herself a glass of merlot. She had missed drinking wine and any other liquor while she was pregnant, and now she was no longer breastfeeding, so she sipped her wine like it was the best-tasting liquid in the world. Less than an hour later, her loving husband walked in and greeted her with a nice kiss.

  “Hey, baby. Ummm, you got it smelling good up in here,” he said, opening the cabinet. He took out a glass and poured himself some scotch. “Where’s my little guy?”

  “Over in his swing. Dinner will be ready in a few minutes,” November told him.

  Tracy moved to TJ. The baby was excited to see his daddy for sure because he talked up a storm. November knew he was happy to be coming out of his swing and moving around. It was hard for her to cook with him sometimes because he’d cry for her to hold him. She’d give him animal crackers and his favorite toy to occupy him while she fixed dinner.

  Tracy walked back into the kitchen, and she realized he wasn’t in his towing uniform. “Hey, where have you been in those nice clothes?”

  “I had some other business to take care of. How was work for you today?”

  “Hard. I still haven’t adjusted to being back or being away from TJ.” When the words left her mouth, she wished she would have just said that things went fine.

  “I told you, you don’t have to worry about working, but you insist that you wanna work.”

  “No, I insist I want to open my own agency, but you’re not trying to hear that,” she said.

  “Novey, please. I just got home, and I don’t wanna discuss that right now.”

  “Why not, baby? You have all these good things going on, and you are opening businesses left and right, but for me, you won’t.”

  “I never said I won’t. I said not now.” He got up and kissed her. “Come on, baby, let’s not get into it. I’m in a good mood, dinner smells wonderful, and my son is ready for his daddy to get outta this suit and play airplane with him.”

  “Fine,” she said, dicing tomatoes for a salad. It was no use trying to talk to Tracy about her business. She hated that he didn’t take her seriously.

  “And please drop the attitude, because I’m not going to change my mind. Our son is too little for you to take on your own advertising agency.” Tracy walked over and picked up the baby. “I’m going up to change. I’ll take TJ with me.”

  When they came back down, Tracy put TJ into his high chair, and they sat down and ate dinner. The conversation was light, and November knew it wasn’t a good idea to bring going into business for herself back up. She didn’t want to cause another argument. She was just relieved that they ate dinner in peace.

  She cleared the table and cleaned the kitchen and got the baby bathed and down for the night. Tracy was comfortable on the sofa with the remote in his hand. Their relationship was superb now that Tracy acted like a normal person instead of a jealous lunatic. She hadn’t had to visit the jealousy conversation anymore since the night her son was born, and all she wanted now was for him to understand how much starting her own company meant to her.

  “Hey, you want some company?” she asked, joining him on the sofa.

  “Yeah, come and keep me company,” he said.

  She walked over and straddled him. She had come to give him a little more than company. She leaned over and kissed him softly on the lips.

  “Aww, that’s what time it is?” he asked, smiling.

  She lifted her shirt over her head and undid her bra. “Oh yes, baby, this is what time it is.”

  Tracy reached up and cupped her breasts and massaged them gently. He sat up and took one of her nipples into his mouth. The warmth of his breath felt good, and she wanted him to suck harder. It hadn’t been long since she had stopped breastfeeding, and she knew that’s why he didn’t suck as hard as she craved him to.

  They kissed passionately, and she remembered why she had fallen in love with Tracy. He was a fantastic kisser and lover. She always got wet just from kissing him. He twisted her nipples, giving her the pleasure she couldn’t get from him sucking on them so lightly.

  He rubbed her ass while she ground against his crotch. His erection was like a pipe covered in cotton. She pulled his shorts down and pulled away his boxers and took him deep inside of her mouth. His groans and the pulsation of his body let her know that she was pleasing him the right way.

  She enjoyed taking her husband’s thick, smooth pole inside of her mouth. She clenched her jaws and carefully bobbed up and down, careful not to let her teeth get in the way.

  He moaned and groaned, cheering her on to suck his dick right. He rubbed her hair. “Yes, baby, that’s so good.” Her spot ached and throbbed for him to be inside of her.

  She stood and allowed her husband to pull her panties down. He put his fingers between her legs and rubbed her clit gently, causing her to become even wetter than she was.

  “Oh, shit, girl,” he whispered.

  She pushed him back onto the couch, slid down onto his erection, and bounced up and down. When he pulled her all the way down on it, she rolled her hips.

  Even after the baby, her silky tunnel was still a perfect fit for her husband’s nine-inch instrument. She enjoyed the sounds of his mo
ans as she rode him. She arched her back, allowing him access to her breasts, and he didn’t waste any time taking one of her hard nipples into his mouth. It felt so good her moans were louder than his. He grabbed her ass and pushed up to get as deep as he could.

  “Aww, yeah, Novey. Ride that dick, baby.” When she exploded, he said, “Oh yeah, baby, that’s it.”

  She rolled her hips harder, and after a few minutes of her giving him her best performance, he made her turn over. He laid her on her back and got on his knees in front of the couch.

  Her ass was hanging off the sofa, and he put her knees over his shoulders. He plunged into her wet pocket, and she could hear the juices popping as he stroked her. His pumps went from steady to a fast, thumping pace. Their skin slapped, and she moaned and screamed from the pleasure he was giving her.

  He leaned forward, putting his mouth on one of her nipples, and he sucked as hard as he could. His hot juice squirted out of his manhood, and he pushed it deeper inside of her. She rubbed his head and listened to his heavy breathing. He rose up and kissed her softly.

  “Damn, that was good,” November said. She was exhausted. She crawled up the steps, following her husband to their bedroom, where she collapsed onto their bed. As soon as they shut their eyes, the baby started to cry. She turned and looked at Tracy. He smiled and kissed her and went to see about his son. November was asleep before he made it to the door.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “‘Love, love, love, love, love, love. Gimme that love,’” November sang with Jill Scott. She was feeling so good that she had pulled out Jill Scott’s first CD and was listening to it in her truck. She and Tracy were in love, and they had been making love two or three times a day. She worked fewer hours at the office and made more love at home. Tracy was coming home in the middle of the day, hitting it, and going back to work. He would come in after work, and they’d get it in before dinner and again in the mornings before he left for work.

  They were acting like sex-crazed teenagers, and November loved it. She got out of her Escalade and went into the mall to get some new lingerie. She had worked every number she had, and she wanted to keep it exciting. As she walked through the mall, she had that weird feeling again that someone was following her.