Sweeping the hair away from her face, he wanted to read her mind but didn’t. It was time for him to read her with his heart, instead of his gifts. “Shauna, I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”
“Neither have I.”
“I really enjoy spending time with you.”
“I enjoy spending time with you, too. Honesty is a big thing with me, Ascher. It can make or break this. I always want you to tell me the truth, no matter what.”
Ascher sighed, as the weight of his deception pressed down on him. There was so much he needed to say, but couldn’t. He looked into her eyes and thought about breaking things off. A lump formed in his throat as he gave her his reply. “I understand.”
Seven ~ Closer
Ascher hurried home, anxious to see his father. He was confused and desperately needed answers, because the woman he was in love with might be a witch. “Father, I need to talk to you.”
Tristan stood, but Ascher motioned him to sit. He might have valuable insight, considering he’d already been through this with, a once human, Kara.
Taking a deep breath, Ascher declared, “Father, I’ve made a decision about the sealing. I can’t do it. If my existence is truly mine, I should be able to choose who I love.”
“No fate other than the one you choose,” Jonas uttered with what looked to be a smirk.
“Maybe we can find a loophole in the covenants or something in the by-laws to invalidate the agreement you made with Clive. Is it possible that Klaus was wrong about us?”
Jonas shrugged. “Anything’s possible, but Klaus is sure that your sealing to Ursula is your destiny.”
Tristan cleared his throat. “But is Ursula really his destiny? Ascher no doubt will seal, but maybe there is another meant for him.”
“A human, perhaps.” Jonas raised a brow at his sons. “Don’t think I don’t know about her, Ascher. Is she worth the raining of Clive’s fury on the family? Are you ready to war with Clive’s inbred bunch of darklings?”
“If I have to fight them, I will,” Ascher replied.
“And she’s worth that?” Jonas asked, surprised.
“There’s something there, Father. I can feel it. I need her more than I need blood to feed.”
Tristan glanced at Ascher and smiled.
“You loved my mother?”
Jonas nodded. “Very much.”
“If anyone told you that you couldn’t be with her, what would you have told them?”
Jonas groaned, gripping the edges of the table until his knuckles strained white with rigidity. “Clive will retaliate, but we’ll be ready for it.”
“There’s something else.” Ascher tortured himself about his existence, and Gabe’s cold words only worsened his insecurities. “Gabe said I was the product of your fascination with science and an obsession with my mother. I know it isn’t true, but I have more questions about her.”
Tristan stood, slipping out of the room without a word.
Jonas’s face beamed an uncharacteristic expression of warmth. “Gabriel was angry, Ascher. I loved Bea very much. Had she lived, I planned to seal to her. You are a very special reminder of that time in my life. Our relationship was by no means conventional, and she endured great pain because of me. She was adamant that you be born, no matter the consequence to her well-being. She was very brave.”
Ascher’s middle name, Westridge, was his mother’s maiden name. His father seemed content to lock that part of his life away. When he was five years old, Jonas gave him an old photograph of her. Ascher glanced at her picture inside his amulet. The years spent without a mother never bothered him. Olivia had pitched in to help raise him. She was the closest he’d come to having a mother. Curious, he’d asked ten years ago, and his father finally opened up about the details of his birth. Gabe’s evil rant had made him question what he already knew to be true.
Ascher sighed.
“What is it son?”
“When you met mother, did you know she was the one?”
“Your mother was so different than anyone I had ever met. Her brown eyes exerted such a strong life force. Her smile pierced every chamber of my cold heart. She was lovely, intelligent and so giving. After she died, the prospect of another seemed pointless.”
Raw emotion showed on Jonas’s face. “I see so much of her when I look at you. I am most proud of your human qualities. You needn't worry about what Gabriel said. You aren’t my bastard from a warm-blooded whore. You aren’t just some science project, either. You’re my son—my miracle from the woman that I will love eternally. Never forget that.”
Ascher stared at his father, absorbing everything he’d said.
The vampire coldness returned to Jonas’s eyes in an instant. “Now if we’re finished here, I’ll be going down to the gardens. It’s a beautiful night.” He raised a scolding brow at Ascher. “And you, my half- blooded son, should be preparing for bed. You’ve not been resting well.” Pointing to his head, he uttered, “Your brothers and I hear you tossing and turning at night.”
Ascher nodded.
“Goodnight, Ascher. May your slumber be peaceful.”
“Goodnight, Father.”
* * * *
Sheridan, Massachusetts
Shauna flipped to her side, kicking the covers to the floor. Sleepless nights were her unfortunate reality, and the incident in the park was the catalyst spurring tonight’s bout of insomnia. Silence now blanketed her fifth floor apartment. No closer to sleep, than an hour ago, she went over to her window.
The brilliantly starred sky and full moon reminded her of nights spent on the overhang of roof outside their shared bedroom window. Stargazing was a childhood past time of the McCutchin sisters. A tear escaped Shauna’s eye as she thought of the mental torture her sister was enduring still living at home. She finally called Ascher after loneliness and depression got the worst of her.
Answering the door an hour later, she whispered, “I hope I didn’t bother you. Sometimes, I get lonely—depressed might be a better word for it.”
He gave her a focused stare. “I was worried, because you hardly said two words in the car. Then you ran into your apartment without even saying goodbye.”
“I’m upset about what happened today. It reminded me of these awful dreams that I have.”
He shifted his weight closer to her. “What dreams?”
“I sometimes dream of demons, fire, and magic.”
“What do you think it means?”
“I’m not sure I’ve had them since I was ten. They’ve gotten worse the last three months.”
“They’re only meaningless nightmares. You should cut out some of those horror movies. I’m here, and I’ll stay with you tonight...if you want me to.”
“I don’t want to be a bother.”
“Always the tortured soul, aren’t you? I thought I made myself clear about my feelings for you. Obviously, I didn’t.” He pulled her into his arms, kissing her.
Hot flashes of heat swept over her body. Twisting her hands into his dark hair, she pulled him dangerously close, the depression changing into longing.
* * * *
Getting physically involved with her might be a bad idea, but Ascher couldn’t help himself. He wanted her too much to deny the sensations she stirred in him. The insatiable need to bite her was just as prevalent as the burning desire to get closer. It was something he wasn’t sure he could control.
He pried his lips away from hers and stood back. “Shauna, maybe we shouldn’t be doing this. You aren’t in the right frame of mind, maybe you don’t know what you want.”
“I know exactly what I want, Ascher. I’m old enough to know what’s good for me. I want to be closer to you, and I want you to be closer to me. “Can you tell me,” she spoke against his lips, “that you haven’t wondered what it would be like? Can you honestly tell me you don’t want me?”
He couldn’t deny that he thought about what it would be like to have her warm skin against his. He also imagined what her blood would ta
ste like—that didn’t mean he should indulge his curiosities on that subject, as well. He clutched his head as his desire for her body blurred with his thirst. Pulling away, he moved to the opposite end of the couch.
“I understand if you don’t want me,” she whispered with a stunned look on her face. “You could do so much better than me.”
Shifting his body towards her, he took her into his arms. He couldn’t believe his ears. How could this woman’s interpretation of herself be anything but positive? She was beautiful beyond words, loyal as the day was long and unselfish to the point that she often overlooked her own needs for others. He kissed her again, this time with a desperate urgency and dangerous edge toward the point of no return. He was losing control. Fire burned his body. An inferno blazed in his throat. All the reasons they shouldn’t make love melted away with each touch of her lips.
She clutched him, refusing to release her grasp. “I want you, Ascher. Don’t you want me?”
He grunted, “Shauna,” because his eyes now burned with lust. He closed them hoping to hide the telltale crimson glaze. Continuing the kiss, his mind sought a good reason to stop them, but he couldn’t find one. Lust trumped common sense, and his desire wasn’t the only thing growing.
“Take me to the bedroom, Ascher. Make love to me.”
His vision saturated with a heavy red film tainting his eyesight. He panicked. The pulsing in his mouth increased, fangs begging to break free of their gummed sheaths.
She grabbed him, forcing him against the couch.
His abruptly broke the kiss. “Shauna, no.” He wiggled away from her. “We shouldn’t do this.”
She silenced him with another kiss.
“We should wait.”
“Why, when I want you so much? I want you now, Ascher. I’m tired of waiting.” Tracing the contour of his lips with her tongue, the erotic outline continued along his neck.
His fingers flexed against her back as intense sensations gripped him, sending heat to his throbbing shaft. Needing only a swift movement to land her in his arms, he strained her shivering body against him. He kissed a heated path from her jaw, over her throbbing carotid and down to her ample cleavage. Clutching her shirt in his fist, he listened as it tore, scattering the buttons on the floor.
Ascher carried her to the bedroom, her legs coiling around his waist. They were both lost in an aggressive, relentless locking of their lips. He lowered her to the bed, ripping the shirt from his shuddering form.
Moonlight flickered off his amulet, reflecting red sparkles against her warm complexion. He sighed with frustration as he channeled thoughts about his necklace. He constantly heard her questions about his eating habits and strange eyes, via her curious brain.
* * * *
The breath caught in Shauna’s chest, the low light of the moon glimmering off a strange necklace around his neck. Its triangular shape held a brilliant round ruby inside a white metal setting. It was mesmerizing and dazzling. She ran her fingertips along its smooth lines, curious about its significance. “That’s a pretty charm.”
“It’s a family heirloom. My brothers and I all have them.”
Observing his reluctance and unwillingness to discuss the bauble, she decided to drop it, rather than upset him. His unblemished skin was extraordinary, given its pale appearance. She expected freckles or a childhood scar, anything to mark his past. The absence of markings made his skin seem even more unusual.
Childhood gave her many physical mementos to carry into adulthood. Endowed with a tomboy heart, she’d fallen out of trees, been catapulted from her bike and skinned her knees more times than she cared to remember. Did he not do any of those things as a child?
She kissed and curved her hands along his quivering, tightly muscled stomach and its thin trail of dark baby soft hair. The happy trail disappeared under his black slacks. She didn't need to see his eyes to know that he wanted her. The spike in his heart rate and tight hold on her back affirmed his desire. Curiosity gripped her, as she wondered what his naked body looked like. Her eyes widened and a trembling hand cupped the massive bulge in his pants. This can’t be right. Maybe he has socks stuffed in there. There’s no way all of this is just him.
Fascinated, Shauna’s breaths quickened with anticipation. She had to see it. Touch it. Hold it in her hand. Only then would the experience be real. Reaching down and unzipping his pants, she attempted to free him, needing a closer look.
* * * *
Ascher groaned, “Shauna no—we can’t…not right now.”
“And why not? Why are you stopping me? Don’t you want me?”
Narrowing his eyes to conceal the crimson blazing in his stare, he half glanced at her. “Baby, my wanting you is not a good enough reason for us to do it. Your first time is such a big deal, and I want you to be sure. Your virginity is precious. Once it’s gone, you can’t get it back.” He could attest to the truth of his last statement, as losing his virginity to Ursula was one of the biggest mistakes he’d ever made. Meeting Shauna only deepened his torment.
The heat exited his body and the crimson left his eyesight. Taking several shallow breaths helped to return his eyes to their normal pale shade. Fully glancing at her, the sight of her teary eyes alarmed him. “Hey. What’s wrong? Did I say something to upset you?”
“No.”
“Why are you crying, if you aren’t upset?”
“I feel like you don’t want me. I’m grateful that you’re considering my feelings, but I really want you. I’m curious about the odd feelings I get when you’re this close to me. How can you stop yourself so easily? Am I so repulsive that you don’t want to make love to me?”
“Shauna.” He placed her hand over the throbbing bulge in his pants. “This is not repulsion. I’m so turned on right now. You wouldn’t believe how turned on I am, and if I weren’t so cautious we’d be in the bed. We can’t make love until I’m sure you’re ready. Sex isn’t something to do just because you’re curious.” He sat on the bed, placing her in his lap. “Can I explain something to you?”
Cuddling against him, she nodded her head.
“I’m smarter now about my heart and the choices I make. The physical act of sex is so easy. Anyone can make body parts match up. True lovemaking—the kind that pierces your heart and knits you to another forever—is more difficult. I can’t wait to experience it, and I’m willing to bet it’s so worth the wait. My next time is going to be with someone I’m in love with. I don’t just want a casual roll in the hay. I want my soul mate, my other half.”
“That doesn’t exist, Ascher.”
She seemed jaded, unbelieving of happily endings. Shaking his head at her, he said, “Aren’t you curious to find out for yourself?” He cupped her chin with his hand. “You're so special—like no one I’ve ever known. You’re just the type of woman I see myself falling in love with.”
Her expression grew puzzled. More questions were coming. “What was she like?”
“Who?”
“Your first.”
He didn’t expect that question so soon after he’d poured his heart out. Sifting through his thoughts, he hoped to construct a convincing answer that diminished Ursula’s importance, while not making him sound capricious about the experience. The last thing he wanted was to upset her. “Oh her. She was a childhood friend. When you’re young, you grow curious and you experiment when curiosity gets the best of you. We just did it. We weren’t in love and after it happened the first time, we just kept doing it because we’d already done it.” He faux scolded her. “See what I mean about curiosity?”
“So, you didn’t love her?”
“I cared about her, but I never felt about her the way I feel about you. It makes me wish I’d waited to have sex with you.”
“I’ve never felt this way about a man before. It’s kinda scary.”
“What scares you about it?” He was interested in what made her tick and often found himself studying her like a case in psychology class.
“I feel so not
in control with you, and I’m far too aggressive. Way too uninhibited.”
“That isn’t a bad thing. It only means you’re comfortable with me. That makes me very happy.” He made a deal with himself to stop channeling her so much, but he couldn’t resist a glance into her mind. She, of course, was confused about how she felt. He expected that, but he never expected to hear, I’m falling in love with him. I can’t believe this is happening so fast. He was falling for her, too.
She gave him a serious, no-nonsense stare as the confines of her mind shut down.
“What does that look mean?”
Her dark eyes narrowed. “Did you two use a condom?”
He struggled to keep the laugh from blurting out. Vampires didn’t need condoms or birth control. No disease known to man could touch them. “We were both virgins, so we weren’t afraid of catching anything.” He told the truth.
“What about pregnancy? Weren’t you afraid of that?”
“She was on the pill.” He lied.
Ascher wanted to say more, he wanted to tell her to run away from him just as fast as her legs could carry her. He wished he hadn’t heard her mind say that she was in love with him. Now it would be almost impossible for him to leave her. Either way the pendulum swung, someone would be unhappy. If he left her, to give her a future, he’d be heartbroken. Staying might mean that her life would be childless.
He should have said many things but couldn’t will himself to do it. Instead, he did exactly what he wanted—kissed her until they both burned hot with desire.
As they drifted off to sleep, he thought about how alive she made him feel. He then thought of how being in love with him was going to ruin her life. He was somewhat of a miracle. Maybe there was another one for them, but it did no good to worry about a future that may never come.
In three days, Clive was free to exact his revenge. This unexpected love had breathed new life into him—while that same love might be the cause of his death.
The Progeny (The Progeny Series) Page 8