* * * *
The fire crackled in the stone fireplace in Ascher’s room at Bonheur. Shauna sat on the floor, her legs crossed at the ankles, her mind in another place. She wondered if Katy was in pain then sniffled in an attempt to thwart another cry fest.
She glanced at Ascher, giving him a slight smile. He was stunning in any light. With the soft glow of the fire upon his face, he was even more striking. She watched while the flames lit his face, casting dark shadows across his perfect features. So many things made more sense to her now—his perfect, unmarked body, his lack of appetite, his overly symmetrical facial features and his lovely, ethereal blue eyes.
He was too quiet and his smiles were forced, but she saw past them to the unrest lying just beneath the charade. He stared into the fire without blinking, a blank expression veiling his face until his gaze became more distant. His mind was somewhere else and she didn’t want to disturb him, so she went to lie down.
Lying there, her mind went to twenty different places. She missed Gypsy. Now would be about the time that she’d hop into bed to rest along the bottom, at her feet. Gypsy was gone, and Katy might be gone, too. The tears came slow at first, increasing when she thought about her sister so far away.
The next thing she remembered was feeling his body next to hers, and she rubbed her eyes. Sleep was clouding her vision but she noted the clock read that it was two in the morning. His arms were tight around her, but he wasn’t sleeping. She angled her head up, so she could look him in the eyes. His pale stare pierced her, sending her heart into nervous sprints.
He smoothed his hand across her face, moving the hair from it. “I’m sorry if I woke you. I can’t sleep.”
Shauna sat up on her elbow and stared him squarely in the eyes. “You want to talk about it?”
“Not really.”
“I’ll talk and you can listen to me.”
He nodded.
“If Katy is dead, I want you to change me. I hate feeling helpless and being human makes me weak and vulnerable to Ursula. How do we even know that Katy was her intended target? Maybe she meant to take me.”
* * * *
Ascher was suddenly grateful that she couldn’t read his mind as he did hers. He’d lifted the contents of the darkling’s vile words from Quinn’s mind during the ride home. Their malicious intent pulsed through his head causing it to throb with rage. This is just a warning. Don’t ever threaten us half-blood. The human will lose more than her cat now, and you can blame yourself for that!
“As long as I’m human, she’ll come after me with everything she has. You can’t protect me all of the time, and your family can’t shadow me every minute. Although, I know that they would, I would never ask them to do that for me. I need to be able to stand on my own and have my own back. So what do you say, Ascher, will you change me?”
He gazed steadily into her eyes, his expression unchanged and his stare still piercing her. “No.”
“So you want me to die?”
“What kind of question is that? My brother is down stairs fighting for his existence. They almost killed me, and Quinn risked himself as well. I don’t think that constitutes the actions of people who want you dead!” He released her from his arms and felt her body stiffen. The frustration and fear brought the acid into his voice.
Shauna was quiet, except for an occasional sniffle.
Ascher turned his back to her and listened to her quiet sobs, until she fell asleep.
Sixteen ~ Sentience
The bright, morning sun burned at Shauna, just as his insensitive tone had the night before. She was awake, but she lay very still, contemplating a way to get from the bed to the bathroom without waking him. Shauna had no idea he could be so coldhearted. It was as if a stranger had somehow inhabited his body for a brief second. She expected to find a pod and empty shell underneath the bed.
Unbelievable! He’d hurt her feelings. Jerk! He never apologized, and he'd turned his back and ignored her. If that was what it meant to be a vampire, she’d pass. He was awake. Well, screw him! She was getting her things and going back to her apartment. He wasn’t the boss of her. Maybe getting back together was a bad idea. Shauna sighed. The only problem was, she loved him and knew he loved her too. She squirmed as his pale arm draped over her, preventing her from leaving the bed. They would have to hash things out before she could leave.
If he thought she’d make an apology easy, he had another thing coming.
“I’m a jerk. My reaction was inappropriate last night. If I might, I’d like to explain it to you.”
Silent, she avoided eye contact. There was no way he was using his vampire mind control on her.
“When I think about you being changed, it frightens me. I’m a half-bloodling. I’ve never changed anyone, so we can’t be sure what you’d become. Vampires make other vampires. We don’t know what someone like me will make. If you took my reluctance as anything other than fear, I’m so sorry. I need a little time to figure things out and to make a plan just in case.”
“Just in case?” She had to admit it was a valid concern.
“If I attempt to change you and you become a vampire, I want to be changed with you. I’m sure Quinn or Tristan would do it, but my father would be furious. He takes joy in my differences. I imagine because it makes him remember my mother. But there is no way I could stay a half-bloodling if you were a vampire.”
“I don’t see why it matters. You were going to seal to Ursula, and she is a vampire.”
“I know, but I love your warm skin and the way you feel. I don’t want to give that up. If we were both vampires, we’d feel the same to one another.”
“So what do we do?” Keep control. “Wait for her to come after me again—maybe next time she’ll get me. She can wipe out the next generation of McCutchins in one fell swoop.” Hold it together, Shauna. No tears. “I’m sure that would make it easier for everyone involved! No more human to complicate things!”
She lost it.
Ascher tried to grab her, but she squirmed away and ran to the bathroom. Once inside, she stood by the window, loud sobs pouring from her lips as tears streamed down her hot face.
He knocked on the door. “Shauna please, let me in. We need to talk this through.”
No way! “I just want to be alone. Please, Ascher—just go.”
“Please open the door, Shauna.”
She waited, never dignifying his plea with a response. After twenty minutes of listening to him shuffle about in his room, the bedroom door shut. Slipping out of the bathroom, she grabbed an old pair of jeans out of a suitcase. After getting dressed, she found her way downstairs. She’d asked to see Tristan many times since the incident on the mountain, and each time there was a new excuse. Today, she was in no mood to hear it. She wanted to thank him for saving her life, and no one was going to stop her.
Locating the back stairs to the basement, Shauna crept down them, stopping when she heard Ascher and Quinn talking about Tristan’s condition. She pressed her ear to the heavy door, but could barely make out their voices.
“He’s better, but something is troubling me about his progress,” Quinn said in a sullen tone.
“What is it?”
“His strength is returning, but the poison is still in his system.”
“Antibiotics?” Ascher questioned.
“Didn’t work.”
“Metal injections?”
“Only made it worse.”
“What if I—”
Quinn’s voice became angry. “No Ash! That is not a possibility. I won’t let you do that!”
“You won’t let me—Quinn he saved me, kept Shauna and I safe. It’s the least I can do.”
Shauna’s heart stopped, as she wondered what he was considering. Whatever it was, Quinn didn’t approve. She was sure that she wouldn’t, either.
“What happened to my free will? No fate other than the one I choose. I’m choosing to save our brother, because he chose to save the woman I love! We know it will work. Why
not just do it and get it over with?”
“Think about what you’re considering.”
“No! His fate will be no different than mine!”
The loud sound of a door slamming came next, followed by silence. She stood outside, contemplating what to do. After nerves and curiosity forced her decision, she crept through the heavy door and stood right outside the infirmary.
Tristan was still, his shuddering and convulsing minimal, his pale eyes saturated with weakness. Ascher was rolling up his sleeve. What was he doing? Quinn’s expression looked furious, the disapproval heavy in his features. A glimpse of something metal caught her eye and, quick as a flash, she saw the dark blood spurting from Ascher’s arm. A loud gasp slipped from her lips.
All eyes shifted to the outside of the door—where she stood. She couldn't hide anymore, so she stepped around the corner.
A low growl came from behind the curtain, and Ascher dashed in front of her as Quinn stood in front of the curtain. The growling continued until a pale figure appeared.
Kara’s eyes glowed red with anger. Quinn scooped her up, securing her body as she struggled and wiggled, attempting to break free. “Get her out of here! It’s her fault my Tristan is like this. Go back where you came from, human. Leave us alone!”
Ascher snarled. “Enough, Kara. Weren’t we kind to you when Tristan chose you? I risked my life for you in Italy. I let you drain me dry, until I damn near died! Don’t talk to her that way. She’s my true mate and I love her, so you’d better learn to accept it. I expect you to welcome her into this family, just as you were welcomed! Besides, she isn’t going anywhere!”
Kara growled some more, but her posture softened. Quinn gave her a cold stare, a warning growl escaping his lips. She glowered over at Shauna, before disappearing behind the curtain.
Ascher gave Shauna a mystified glare. “What are you doing down here?”
“I wanted to see Tristan, and I’m tired of hearing excuses about why I can’t.” She glared back before shifting her eyes over to the bed. “May I?”
Ascher pointed his hands towards Tristan, allowing her to approach.
Shauna sat in the chair by the bed, as another low growl came from Kara’s direction. Grasping his cold hand, she shivered as waves of iciness coursed her body.
Tristan’s eyes were more vibrant than the last time she’d seen him. Like his siblings, he had the same pale eyes but that was where the similarities ended. His hair was flaming red and his complexion sprinkled with tiny freckles—the highest concentrations being along the bridge of his nose. He was undoubtedly not a direct blood descendant.
“I’m glad to see you are well this morning,” he greeted with a polite and inviting tone.
“I wish I could say the same to you,” Shauna replied.
“It’s not as bad as it looks.”
“I don’t believe that, Tristan.” She rubbed his cold cheek. “I want to thank you for risking your life to protect me. I’m nothing to die for, but I thank you all the same.”
Tristan squeezed her hand with a weak grasp. “I beg to differ. My brother loves you more than his own existence. To me, that makes you worth the fight.”
“I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you for what you’ve done.” She turned to Quinn. “You either.”
Tristan sighed. “The only repayment I need is my brother’s happiness. If you want to repay me, make Ash happy.”
Shauna glanced over at Ascher. The expression he wore on his lovely face was a sweet mixture of love and complete confusion. She stood up, tears streaming from her weary eyes as her gentle hands rubbed Tristan’s pale arm once more. “I hope to see you again. That is, if they’ll let me come back down.”
Tristan smirked. “I’m sure that won’t be a problem, will it, Kara? She isn’t as tough as she appears. She only wants to protect me. I apologize for her behavior.”
“If it was Ash, I’d feel the same way. Good-bye, Tristan.”
“Take care, Shauna and don’t worry about Katy. The guys are leaving tomorrow night for Romania. They’ll bring her back safe and sound.”
Shauna went back to stand beside Ascher, and he encircled her waist with his arms immediately. She leaned over to him and whispered, “I’m so sorry about earlier. Can you ever forgive me?”
“I’m sorry for shutting you out last night. I let my fear consume me.”
Tristan smiled at the pair. “You kids get out of here! The day is so beautiful. Show her Bonheur, Ascher. Drink the wine. Make love.”
* * * *
Shauna sat at the vanity in Ascher’s room. Brushing her hair seemed pointless and painful—everything reminded her of her sister. The very brush she raked through her head was a gift from Katy. She couldn’t shake the feeling that Katy was in pain. She dreamed of her in the dark, scared, holding on to what was left of her sanity.
“She was going to be Valedictorian.”
“Was? Why are you talking about her like she’s already dead?”
“I’m so afraid that my sister is gone. There’s no way to know what those maniacs have done to her!”
“Shauna, Katy has a support system waiting for her when she gets home. Tristan and I will treat her. With love and support, she’ll heal. I believe in that. She needs you to believe in it, too. ”
He reached for her, but she refused to let him hold her, stepping away from the comfort of his embrace. She didn’t want it. “No! I’m tired of this pain,” she blurted out. “I just want it to stop! Everything is just so screwed up right now. I’m poison, bad for everyone who loves me. Stay away from me!”
“Calm down. This isn’t good for you.”
“Good for me? I don’t even know what’s good for me, anymore. So how can you pretend to know?”
Ascher disappeared from her sight, reappearing closer to hug her into him. She fought against his embrace, sorrow’s river streaming down her face.
“This isn’t your fault, Shauna.”
Her body tensed against his warm touch. “I just want to be numb. Feel nothing for a little while,” she whispered. “Know what I mean?”
“That isn’t you. You face things head on. You’re so strong.”
“I don’t feel very strong.” Her eyes shifted away from his face. “Look at this. You’ve fixed this room to suit me, but this isn’t my home. I don’t have one. My parents hate me so much that my sister has to lie to see me. I can’t go to my apartment because it’s not safe. Gypsy’s dead. Katy might be dead. I don’t belong here, and I don’t even know where I belong anymore.” She sobbed, while pounding her fists onto his chest.
“You’re hurting. That’s the thing about having a heart. It breaks and yearns for things.” His eyes caught hers, love pouring from them, stunning her with their sincerity.
“What does your heart yearn for, Ascher?”
He didn’t immediately answer her.
* * * *
Ascher held her even tighter, gripping her with the need to protect her from harm. She brought the warrior out of him, that fierceness he’d witnessed in his brothers but never thought he’d ever possess. His hold now mimicked the desire to shield her, shelter her, but mostly the overwhelming need to possess her, completely.
“You’ve never been more wrong, about anything, in your life,” he murmured, his eyes sweeping hers. “This is exactly where you belong, with me and my family—the ones who care about you. I can’t tell you I know how it will all turn out, but I will tell you this. I’ll be there for you as little or as much as you need me to be. If you want to talk about Katy, or anything else, all you have to do is talk because I’m always listening.”
Ascher pulled her to him with possessive arms, an aching in his lips, hungering for the touch of hers. This was what his heart yearned for. His gaze scorched her, smoldering intention into her.
She froze, her gaze fixed on his pale stare.
He guided her back toward the bed, her feet stepping with his, their hearts beating eerily in sync.
Shauna fell ba
ck against the bed, while his arms directed her to the center. She continued staring, her gaze unmoving, her lips an equal participant in the passion playing out between them. Ten seconds was all he needed to undress them, leaving their bodies heated and grinding against one another.
The crimson blazed in front of his vision. He wanted her and was ready to cement their love, to make her his.
Trepidation was a thing of the past. She knew what he was and somehow still wanted him. He dropped his head onto the pillow to conceal his blood red gaze.
His voice was rough and husky—he’d never imagined such a sound could come from his lips. “I know you say this is what you want, but are you sure? I want you to be so sure about this. Once I’ve made love to you, I can’t take it back. I want you. I swear to you there is nothing else I want more. I don’t want you, if you’ll regret this tomorrow. I couldn’t live with myself if you ever regretted this.”
“I’ll never want anyone more. The sky could crash down around me and I wouldn’t care, so long as your arms were the last things I felt before I died.” She tightened her arms around his neck. “I’m not disillusioned about what I’m doing and I can deal with the consequences of my actions. I want you, more than I want to live or breathe.”
He grazed her neck with his tongue, picking up traces of her delectable essence. His lips deluged her soft skin with careful kisses, his finger exploring her with a gentle urgency. Her opening was tight and only allowed the tip of his finger entrance.
Shauna moaned, her neck craning back and exposing the constant thump of her carotid.
The craving sparked in him, his fangs paining beneath the gums. He wanted another taste of her. No. You can’t bite her again. Get control of yourself.
“Do it,” she moaned.
“What?”
“If it pleases you, then do it.” She brought her neck back to his mouth. “Bite me, Ascher. I want you to.”
“No.”
Shauna smoothed her hands along his chest, his stomach—stopping before they reached his shaft. She seemed unsure.
After his curt reaction to her exploring his body, the night before the blow up, he didn’t blame her. Craving her touch, he grabbed her hand to place it on his steel stiff shaft. He wanted her to discover every part of his anxious body. The softness of her warm hand felt good—too good as it stroked, played with and explored every inch of him.
The Progeny (The Progeny Series) Page 18