It had to be her choice.
Quinn rushed into the room with six bottles of type O blood then set up an I.V. to administer fluids. Like most of the Rousseaus, Quinn held several medical degrees. Ascher held two of his own, but couldn’t emotionally detach himself to treat Shauna as a patient.
“Sit her up for me,” Olivia demanded. “We have to stop the internal bleeding first. Does Quinn need to take over, or can you handle this?”
Ascher sighed. “I’m fine and I’m not leaving her. Tell me what you need me to do.”
“Prop her head up,” Olivia ordered, pressing on Shauna's stomach. More blood gushed from beneath her. “She’s miscarrying for sure.”
Ascher saw red as he growled, “No!”
“Quinn!” Olivia shouted. “I need you to grab my bag and give her some Pitocin to stop the bleeding. Ascher.” Olivia turned to him now. “Put her legs in the stirrups.” Gloving her hands, Olivia quickly checked her and surmised, “She’s going to need a D&C tomorrow morning.”
With the bleeding under control and Shauna floating on a morphine cloud, Ascher decided to occupy his mind by cleaning the blood-splattered mess in the infirmary. He transferred Shauna to another bed to clear the soiled sheets.
Quinn appeared, immediately grabbing a sponge to help disinfect the surfaces. He looked up and caught his brother’s anguished stare. “I just came back from Gabe’s room. Katy seems to be doing a little better.”
Ascher continued mopping the same spot on the floor.
“Ash, are you okay?”
Devastated, mentally exhausted and barely holding on to his sanity, Ascher stopped mopping. “If she dies, I’ll die, too. Simple as that.”
“She isn’t going to die, but you still have a dilemma. What are you going to do about Ursula? She’s not going to stop coming for her. She nearly killed her this time. Next time, Shauna might not be so lucky. Why didn’t you kill that bitch when you had the chance?”
Ascher’s vision blurred bright red. “Ursula’s days are numbered. I only let her live, so she can feel the pain of having to grieve for her father. If she comes at us again, there’s a silver spike with her name on it. For what she did to Katy, she deserves to die. For what she’s done to Shauna and my child, she will surely suffer—before she dies!”
Two days passed. In those two days, Ascher and Olivia kept vigilant watches. Each day, Shauna’s complexion warmed, the flush in her cheeks attesting to her growing strength. Worried about his human love, Ascher’s family visited from all over the world to check on Shauna’s recovery.
Olivia assured him that Shauna would conceive again. Each member of the family was livid and agreed that Ursula should pay for what she did, pledging their full support when the time came. Considered innocents, the covenants protected Shauna and the baby.
On the evening of the second day, Ascher sat in the lone chair by his bed—writing and watching Shauna’s peaceful slumber. He focused in on her as she stirred, rousing from her deep sleep. Cupping her face with his hand, he whispered, “Hey,” as a wide smile brightened his exhausted face. “Welcome back, sweetheart. How do you feel?”
* * * *
“Like a truck hit me, and then dragged me for miles,” she replied. Every muscle, bone and joint in her body ached. She lifted herself and groaned. “Ascher, where am I?”
“You’re at Bonheur. We’re home.”
It was the first time he’d called the manor her home. “What happened to me?” A ripple of pain seized her stomach and she asked, “Is the baby okay?”
“You passed out. Don’t you remember?”
“I don’t think so.” Disorientation clouded her memory. “I only remember seeing Katy. She was weak and frail, but she was alive. I told her to run from Ursula. Where is my sister? I want to see her.” She attempted to raise herself up. “Is Katy okay?”
Ascher pressed her back against the pillow. “We’ll talk about it when you’ve rested.”
Shauna regarded him suspiciously. “What are you hiding from me?”
Ascher’s eyes evaded her inquisitive stare. “I don’t want to upset you.”
“I thought we were going to be truthful and keep no secrets.” Shauna arched her brow at him. “You’re not keeping up your end of the bargain.”
His quivering hands held hers, his eyes cautiously searching. “Katy is awake, but she’s medicated for her pain. She lost a lot of blood and was pretty battered and bruised. Gabe and Quinn are taking great care of her. Do you trust me?”
Shauna nodded.
“Then trust me to know what’s best for you right now. I promise you that she’s fine. Everyone is more worried about you right now.” His eyes creased as an uneasy expression arose from the concern.
Shauna didn’t like that look. Her heart hammered in her tightened chest as a swell of pain concentrated below. She gripped her tummy. “I feel so weak. Why am I so weak, Ash?” Her eyes shifted downward. “Why do I hurt down there?”
“You lost a lot of blood, too. Olivia transfused you four times.” Ascher squeezed her hand. “Sweetheart, the baby passed. I’m so sorry, Shauna. Olivia says not to worry, because you are perfectly healthy and we can have more kids. Quinn even helped to save your life in the infirmary.”
“No!” she shouted at the top of her lungs, as her picture of the Eiffel Tower fell to the ground. “I don’t believe you! Why would you say something so awful to me? He isn’t gone—he can’t be!” The windows rattled. “Tell me, it isn’t true.”
Ascher lowered his head.
“No! She doesn’t get to take anything else from me—I want my baby. He can’t be gone!” Her vision tinted gray as she balled her fists, punching him until her arms hurt and her eyes flooded with tears. “I hate her! That bitch, I’ll see her dead!” Her body drooped, as her hysterical rants became anguished sobs.
He sat in the bed, next to her, cuddling her against his chest. “I’m so sorry. I’ve had some time to let it sink in. I put on a brave face, but I’ve been so miserable, worrying I’d lose you and wondering if I could’ve saved the baby. I’ve wanted you to wake up just as much as I’ve dreaded it—I didn’t want to tell you.”
“I’m sorry, Ash. If I was stronger…” She traced her hand down along his face. “That baby was our future.”
“No, Shauna. Don’t go blaming yourself. You didn’t do this!” He smoothed his hand along her face. “The baby was an extension of our love. As long as we have each other, we have our future. We’ll try again in a few months...when you’re better. At least we know that it’s possible.”
“I can’t believe Quinn helped save me.”
Quinn appeared seemingly out of nowhere. “It’s true. You were very cooperative, too. Not at all how I expected you to be. How are you feeling?”
She stared up at him, forcing a small smile. “I still feel weak, but I’m so grateful. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you for saving my life so many times.”
“We don’t keep score around here, but in case you do, know that you’ve saved a couple of lives yourself.”
“Me? I haven’t done anything. What do you mean?”
“It was the combination of your potent blood inside of Ascher’s that saved Tristan. We know he bit you right before I knocked on the door that day. So, no more of that repaying us crap, because you’ve done your fair share of saving.” Quinn smiled at her as he lightly smoothed a cool hand over her forehead. “If you need anything else, let me know.” He turned to Ascher. “I’m going down to the gardens. There’s a bit of a situation down there.”
* * * *
Ascher’s blood boiled as a low growl slipped from his lips. After a second, he evened out his expression and turned back to Shauna. He channeled Quinn as he left. I’ll let you handle that. I’m not leaving her side.
“What do you think is happening in the gardens?” Shauna asked.
Ascher grinned, the rage hidden underneath. “It’s nothing to lose sleep over. My family will take care of it. I only want you to conc
entrate on getting better. Are you hungry or thirsty? I’ll bring you something up.”
“Okay.” She stared into his eyes and looked as if she would drift off again.
Stroking her arm, he watched as her eyes closed. Kissing her, he whispered, “Sleep now, love. You’ll grow stronger in your slumber. Never forget that I love you.”
Ascher kept a watch on the developments in the gardens, via Quinn’s mind. Ian was there. What a masochist. Surely, he understood that he’d never make it out of the compound alive. Maybe, he didn’t care.
Ascher read Ian’s mind, seeing Ursula giving the orders for him to come to Bonheur to kill him. Was there no end to her wickedness? How stupid to attack three days after the confrontation, when they were on high alert and expecting it. She had much to learn about battle and with Clive and Skylar both dead, she’d be alone in her feeble mastery.
He didn’t feel sorry for Ursula. How could he, when his love lie grieving their precious baby and recovering from the wounds inflicted on her, by Ursula?
Ascher’s vision flashed to crimson, a smirk materializing on his face as he channeled Quinn impaling Ian with a silver javelin. He and his family wouldn’t tolerate any more attempts on Shauna’s life. He’d impale, dismember and incinerate anyone who breathed even a harsh word her way. Showering quickly, he made it back to the bed just as Shauna woke.
“Are you okay?” he asked, smoothing a hand across her forehead.
“I want to talk to you about something,” she whispered, her eyes fluttering.
“I want to talk to you about something, too. You go first.”
Shauna propped herself with a pillow. “I love you.”
“I know you do. My love for you transcends my heart. What I feel for you will last for an eternity, but I'm willing to sacrifice my happiness to give you everything you want.”
She looked baffled. “You’ve already given me that.”
He gently curved his hand across her face. “No, Shauna, you don’t understand. If you stay with me, you’ll be denying yourself a chance at happiness. I can’t let you do that.”
“I only want you, Ascher.”
Ascher knew what he planned to do and what he was about to say, made no sense. He needed to give her one last chance at a normal life. “I’m not enough! You should have everything you want. Being with me will limit what you can do, where you can go, how you live your life.”
“Don’t give me the brush off, Ascher. Just say what you mean!”
He loved her enough to set her free, if it was what was best for her. His heartbreak was nothing compared to the thought of her living an unfulfilled life. “I want you to live your life and forget about me. I’m poison, Shauna.”
“I never thought of you as a coward, but that’s exactly what you’re being.” She swiped away her tears. “When I gave myself to you, I wasn’t sure if I’d ever see you again. My virginity wasn’t something that I took lightly. I wanted you to be the first and you were. More than that, you’ve been my first love, my first heartbreak and my first lover. I want you to be my only lover for the rest of my life. I want you forever, Ascher. Not just for a lifetime. I want you for the rest of eternity.”
Ascher placed his hand over her mouth. “Shauna, please. You can’t know what you’re saying.”
“My sister loved me and for a long time, she was the only person who I knew, without a doubt, loved me. Now she’s clinging to her life! Our baby lie innocent in my womb, but Ursula did away with him. She’s infected every part of my life and hurt those close to me. She and her minions have to pay for what they’ve done! I’ll never forgive her, no matter how long I live.” Her lips pursed as her eyes burned with anger. “As long as I’m human, Ursula will come after me. I hate her! As long as I’m mortal, you’ll be conflicted by your need for my blood and your love for me. It doesn’t have to be that way. The solution is so simple.”
“No, Shauna. Nothing about this life is simple. You don’t know what you’re asking for.”
“Yes, I do. Change me, Ascher—make me like you.”
“No, I can’t. I won’t bring you into a life of bloodlust and cursed damnation!”
“So, what do we do? Sit and wait for me to die? I’m older now, than I was yesterday. I’ll be older tomorrow, than I am right now. Sure, you enjoy my mortal flesh now, but what about when I’m older. What then?”
He ignored her tantrum and waited patiently for her to finish. When she was done, he knelt down beside the bed, kissing her hand then her lips. “Are you finished?”
“Only, if I’m getting through to you.”
“I’m getting you loud and clear. It’s my turn to talk.”
She nodded.
Ascher channeled her mind and saw how sure she was about wanting him forever. She wasn’t just saying the words. She really wanted it. Her thoughts were the answer to his fears. He’d heard how Alex reacted to having his choice taken from him. He didn’t want that for Shauna, no matter how much he loved her. The decision to become an immortal wasn’t an easy one, and Shauna had the option to stay human without losing him. Still, she wanted it and she wanted him.
“An immortal’s existence isn’t plagued by the constant awareness of aging, but I’ve died a little every day since the first time I laid eyes on you. I’ve tortured myself with worry about the things I desired and the impossibility of those things. Now, it’s all clear to me, Shauna. The most beautiful part of my existence only came the day you walked into my life. I want to spend the rest of my existence with you. I don’t know how we’ll make this work; I only know that we have to.”
She parted her lips, attempting to speak.
Ascher smiled and shook his head in disapproval. “Please, let me just get this out.”
She returned his smile and nodded her head.
“In the beginning, I was so careful and determined to guard your heart, fearing what being in love with me would do to you. Now, I’m so selfish. For me, it isn’t a matter of if you love me enough to want me forever. Now, the urgency lies in the fact that my heart won’t survive without you. I can’t live without the blood that sustains me, but I’ll die a greater death, a more excruciating one, without you. I’d rather have the heart ripped from my chest than to spend my existence without the love that you’ve given me. Shauna, my mortal heart beats for you. My lips ache to kiss yours, but most importantly, my weary soul yearns to be with yours forever.”
A tear fell from her eye.
“I’m immortal, but your refusal will mortally wound me.”
“Refusal?”
“There are some things that are as constant as the moon—the flow of the river into the ocean, life, death and my undying love for you. Shawnette Reagan McCutchin, make me the happiest man alive—seal to me for eternity.”
“What?”
Ascher froze. He’d planned for this, believing that he knew her mind, yet he braced himself for the possibility that she might say no. “In human terms, I’m asking you to marry me.”
Shauna stared at him, her dark eyes brimming with more tears. “You’re serious?”
He nodded.
“Yes!” she cried out.
“Good, now I can give you this.”
Ascher opened his hand, revealing a ring. He held it up to show her a perfectly round, blood red stone with baguette shaped diamonds flanking either side.
Her eyes widened before a look of wonder lit her smiling face. “Ascher, it’s so unique and beautiful.”
“It’s not the traditional diamond, but if you want one, you can have it. I’ll fly you to New York in the morning. You can have any ring you want.”
“That isn’t necessary. This ring is gorgeous.”
“Remember the story I told you about my grandfather?”
She nodded.
“The center stone is his, and I want you to have it.”
Shauna glanced at his neck. “Your necklace is gone. You took your stone and made it into a ring for me. That stone is part of your family’s history. W
hy would you do that?”
“Sweetheart, you’re my family, too. If you’re going to spend eternity with me, you’ll need this stone to protect you. I’ll get another bloodstone.”
She gave him a perplexed stare before the breath caught in her throat. “What did you just say?”
“If you’re going to join me, you’ll need this stone.”
“You’re agreeing to change me?”
“Ursula won’t stop coming for you. Maybe if you were immortal, you'd stand a better chance of survival. Shauna, I can’t lose you. My heart wouldn’t survive it.” He stroked her awed, stunned face with his hand before giving her the softest flutter of a kiss.
“What changed your mind? You were so against changing me before.”
Ascher let out a forlorn sigh. “Before I found you in that room in Romania, I thought I’d lost you and the baby. There was nothing left for me. I ran down the corridors hoping for the best, but preparing myself for the worst.” He held her hand up to his heart. “When I tell you that I want you forever that’s just what I mean. I don’t believe there is a heaven for someone like me. I’m cursed, an abomination of nature. Any hell that I deserve could never equal the torture of living a life that doesn’t include you. I’ll protect you with my last breath. If it meant my life for yours, my death is a mere formality.”
“Damn it, Ascher. Promise me that you’ll live out your existence, no matter what happens to me. I couldn’t stand it if—”
“You’re crazy if you think I’ll live my life without you.” He placed the ring on her finger. “This makes it almost official.”
“Almost?”
“We have one more thing to do and it might be a little difficult.”
“What is it?”
“Custom says we need my father’s blessing to seal.”
“And let me guess, he doesn’t approve?”
“He’s fond of you and he seems happy that we were able to make life, but I’m still not sure. We’re being summoned to the great hall.”
The Progeny (The Progeny Series) Page 28