“What about Peder?”
“He’s fine. I saw him before I went in after you.” He caressed her head, waiting for her to stop trembling. “It was awful, Elsa. But the worst is over. You’re safe, sweetheart. You’re safe.”
For a moment it was as if no one else existed. In her relief and gratitude, Elsa wanted nothing more than to be close to this dear friend who had saved her. To concentrate on his loving eyes, not the evil beyond. He was her strength, her shield. She turned her head and looked up at him in the soft moonlight. “Thank you, Karl.”
His eyes closed for a moment, then he opened them to look at her from under heavy lids. “Elsa, Elsa,” he groaned. She frowned at his tone, wondering if he was hurt. Then, cradling her head in the crook of one arm, Karl laid her down on the forest floor and kissed her before she could say a word.
Peder sensed that the fight was waning. They were slowly gaining the upper hand over the marauders, and it was a good thing. Many of his crew were injured or dead, and the Sunrise had sustained damage from the fire and the melee. The thing that concerned him most, however, was that he had not seen Elsa since she emerged from the smoky cabin. He had tried to get to her, but was unable to free himself. After Karl had tackled Dutton, Peder had glimpsed his friend diving over the edge. Had Elsa escaped? Was Karl going after her? Was she all right? His hands grew damp with fear. It infuriated him that he could not free himself long enough to see to her safety himself.
When the fury evolved into energy and renewed vigor, he turned toward Dutton, who was once again on his feet. Peder picked up a saber from a fallen sailor and, although he was no fencer, went after the rogue captain like a madman on the warpath. Dutton backed off, warding off his clumsy blows with a surprised look on his face. He managed to hold Peder off at swords’ points for a moment.
“You think you can eat my food, ogle my ship?” Peder said, tense with waiting for Dutton’s next move. They each panted, chests heaving, worn from the effort of sustained battle. “You think you can burn her to the waterline and pillage my cargo?”
Dutton moved left, returning his gaze but saying nothing, breathing hard.
“But above all that, you think I will simply disregard the way you looked at my wife, the way you spoke to her?”
“I will make you a bargain.”
“What?” Peder asked with a laugh. “What can you possibly offer me?”
“Let me go, and your wife will live.”
Peder froze. “What are you talking about? Elsa is safely ashore, hidden from you and your scurvy crew.”
“No. If they value their lives, my men have taken your Elsa and hauled her aboard the Lark for safekeeping. She is valuable, you know.”
Peder gritted his teeth and, moving suddenly, shoved Dutton’s rapier aside and broad-shouldered him to the ground. They ended up on the deck, Peder on top, his saber against Dutton’s neck. He battled against the urge to slit the man’s throat right then. He leaned closer to the pirate. “You had better pray that she is unhurt.”
“Isn’t that your prayer?” Dutton asked insolently.
In a rage, Peder hit him. Dutton quieted as he cradled his head.
Peder looked up to see several of his men surrounding them. “All clear?” he growled.
“They’ve turned tail and run, Cap’n,” Stefan said.
“And the first mate?” he asked.
“Over the side, Cap’n,” put in another. “He went after the two louts who were chasing Mrs. Ramstad.”
Peder swallowed hard. So Elsa had gone overboard, chased by Dutton’s men. Was she all right? Had Karl gotten to her in time?
“You there, tie up Dutton and make sure he does not leave,” Peder ordered. “Stefan, come with me. You’re unhurt?”
Stefan nodded. The second mate was not overly tall, but stocky and broad-shouldered. If Elsa and Karl were still in danger, Peder would need someone by his side. “You are an able swimmer?”
“Aye, Cap’n, one of the first in this afternoon.”
“Good enough. Let’s make sure my wife and first mate are safe and sound.” Peder did not wait for Stefan’s agreement. He picked up a large bowie knife from another fallen sailor, placed it in his clenched teeth, and dove overboard.
The salt water stung against Peder’s cuts and grazes as he hit the surface and began swimming, but its sting served to revive him. O God, he prayed silently as his arms and legs propelled him smoothly and swiftly through the water. Let them be all right. Please don’t let me be too late.
Two shots rang out from the Sunrise, and Peder grimaced as shouts carried over the water.
“Cap’n!” Stefan shouted. “It’s Dutton and his men! They’re getting away!”
“Let them go,” Peder grumbled, treading water. “First things first.” He had to see to his wife, then quickly get back to his ship.
Before long he and Stefan were stealthily walking ashore, wanting to gauge the situation before making their presence known. He nodded to the two bodies on the beach, and Stefan went to ascertain their condition. Looking one way then the other, Peder moved closer to the tropical forest. The Lark was a good quarter mile from shore. Were the two sailors lying prone on the sand the only marauders who had given chase? Maybe Karl had killed them and hidden Elsa away! He knelt as Stefan joined him, listening for anything more than the breeze in the palms. Nothing.
“Elsa!” he whispered loudly. Before him, visible in the moonlight, he could see where someone had trampled their way into the underbrush … or where someone had been chased …
“Elsa!” he tried a bit louder, his heart pounding in fear. “Karl!”
It was a long moment before Karl realized that Elsa was pushing him away. He was so convinced that her feelings were similar to his, so carried away by the closeness of the moment, the sensual pull of damp, cool fabric over warm bodies, that he ignored all else. All thoughts of Alicia Hall … of Peder … flew from his mind. When he came to his senses, he leaned back, and Elsa used the moment to push him away. Stunned, he watched as she stood and shook her head, as if to erase what had just transpired. Through the shadows and shafts of moonlight, Elsa backed away, looking at him as if he were one of the pirates.
He hopped to his feet, his hands out, beseeching her to understand. “Elsa, Elsa, forgive me! It was just too much! You could have been killed! I’m sorry I kissed you. I wasn’t thinking. I was only so glad that you were alive, unhurt …” He shook his head and studied her. They were making no progress, just advancing across the small clearing in a desperate dance. Elsa still looked stunned. Surely she had suspected! Surely she had wanted the kiss as much as he had wanted to kiss her!
“Elsa, you must understand by now. Surely you’ve known. I’ve tried to forget it, to shove it away. But each time you come near, I can’t, Elsa. I’m in love with you!”
“No—”
“Yes! I’ve been in love with you since we returned to Bergen last year and I saw you waiting high on the hill. But you never looked my way. It was always Peder, Peder. Why? Was it his money?”
She looked at him with an incredulous expression of outrage.
He ran his hand through his damp hair, feeling the grit of sand. “How can I make you understand?”
She kept shaking her head as if to awake herself from a bad dream.
“Please understand, Elsa. I did not want these feelings. I begged God to take them away. But I cannot rid myself of them. I’ve come to believe that God wants us together because—”
“Stop!” she commanded.
Karl froze, waiting.
“Don’t say another word. You simply make it worse.”
“But surely—”
“Elsa! Karl!” Peder burst into the clearing behind him, but Karl did not turn. He could only stare at Elsa and watch her expression turn to one of relief at Peder’s arrival. It was as if he watched her being pulled away from him forever, like an iceberg out to sea.
“You’re safe!” Peder rushed toward Elsa, and she ran into his
arms, her face already turned away from Karl’s.
Peder hugged her then held her away, seeing the dark stain of blood on her dress front. “Elsa, are you all right? Are you hurt?”
Elsa shook her head and looked toward Karl.
“Are you all right, man?” Peder asked in concern, looking at Karl’s chest.
For the first time, Karl noticed the wound that bloodied his white shirt. But he knew that the worst wound he bore was deep inside him. At that moment Stefan arrived, but Karl barely looked at him.
“Thanks, brother, for protecting my wife,” Peder said soberly, taking a step across the clearing to shake Karl’s hand. But Karl stepped back from his friend’s proffered hand, staring into Elsa’s eyes.
It was over. It was all over.
There would be no going back.
His actions had changed everything.
Elsa paused, her pen poised over the blank paper. For a moment she allowed herself to think of Karl. It had been over a month since the attack on the Sunrise, Dutton’s escape on the Lark, and the revelation of Karl’s feelings. Had she known all along, or had her own naiveté made her blind to the warning signs? Kaatje had even commented on it. Did she just not want to hear the truth? Had she hurt Karl more in being so stubbornly blind to the truth?
She agonized over it, but could resolve nothing in her own mind and heart. Perhaps writing would be cathartic, she thought, picking up her pen again and dipping it into the inkwell.
29 April 1881
Dearest Kaatje,
I pray this finds you well and nursing a healthy baby. Do I have an honorary niece or nephew? Mail has not caught up with us yet, though we hope to find a package awaiting us in San Francisco. Perhaps then I shall discover your news. Let us see … The little mite must be near to four months old by now? It seems impossible that you could be a mother for as long as that, and I have yet to meet the little man. Or is it the little woman?
Elsa paused and thought about Tora. Was she truly an aunt by now? She felt a brief twinge of guilt for not remaining by her sister’s side, but then quickly repeated to herself why she had left: Innocent or not, the girl had to learn, and it would be painful lessons that might shape her into a woman. Then her thoughts naturally turned to the recurring question of who the father could have been. Tora always refused to say, and Elsa, embarrassed over the whole mess, had not pressed her. An image of Soren entered her head, but she dismissed it, feeling terribly sinful even imagining that such an affair had transpired. No, better to forget recriminations and marry her sister to someone respectable, someone who would care for her and her child. Perhaps the whole experience would force Tora to grow up and marry Kristoffer, as she should.
I, on the other hand, am still without child, despite my desperate hope for one—and not for want of trying. I suppose that God has insight that I do not, and the child will come when it is right. In the meantime, I am traveling with Peder to Washington Territory, the first voyage on which he has allowed me along.
Once again Elsa thought about the attack, but decided not to mention it. Kaatje would only fret if she thought Elsa in danger. And the danger was long past. The Sunrise had been repaired and was ready to face the Horn, just a month behind schedule.
We were given the opportunity to remain here in the West Indies this last month and a half, and I have completed a painting of which I feel sure Fergus Long would be proud. I love it because it will always remind me of this—Elsa paused, reflecting on word choice—idyllic cove and the adventures encountered here. The only sadness in it is my memory that it is here that we parted ways with our dear friend Karl.
Feeling claustrophobic as first mate, Karl has left us, unexpectedly opting to move to Saint Paul, Minnesota, to accept an offer to pursue his own steamboat enterprise with some railroad baron. This came as some surprise, as Peder had planned to build Karl’s steamboat after this next schooner. But apparently he was decided and so eager, he could not finish our voyage west. Instead he hopped a merchant vessel heading toward New York. He should arrive in Saint Paul within a few weeks. I do hope that his new venture goes well. I fear we will see precious little of him in the future.
“But that will be our saving grace,” she whispered, staring at her words. What kept her from spilling all of the story onto the page? Why keep it a secret from her best friend? But Peder did not even know what had transpired, she concluded. He had looked at her with some suspicion after Karl had left in such a hurry. But he was simply casting about, trying to find some reason for Karl’s irrational decision and behavior. Peder’s countenance had turned from bewilderment to anger when they had returned to the ship and he discovered Karl’s plan to leave. Elsa shivered as she remembered their heated argument in the sitting room. She had huddled on the edge of the bed in the next room, listening, unable to tear herself away, terrified by what was transpiring.
“What has happened to you?” Peder had roared in frustration. “Something monumental must’ve happened for you to behave so!”
“Nothing has happened. I simply feel I am on the wrong track. That God has a different path for me to follow. John Hall has offered me this opportunity—”
“As have I! Why not remain with friends and build your business alongside us?”
“You do not understand. There is more to it. John will have my steamboat done by the time I get there, not in another year. I can begin my own enterprise now.” His tone sounded half sure.
Peder was silent for a moment. Elsa could almost picture his face. “I do not understand, man. In our yard, you will have your own vessel in a year, built to your specifications. Why do I get the feeling that you are running from something? Why come all this way just to turn around? Is it money?”
“No, no. How many times do I have to tell you? I wanted to make sure you were going to be all right, that the Sunrise was shipshape. Surely you won’t encounter anything worse than the Lark’s attack. The Sunrise is almost repaired, and the injured or dead seamen replaced—”
“With men I doubt in some respects,” Peder interrupted.
“They are sound. And so is the Sunrise. You will be fine without me.”
Peder hesitated, then spoke. “Why do I feel like something has changed between us? You are … distant.”
“I do not know what you’re talking about. Look, the William Jeffries sets sail for the States at sunrise, and I intend to board her tonight if the captain will have me.”
“Why are you running out on me?” Peder asked, his voice rising. “There is an aspect to this story that is hidden from me. Never in the ten years we’ve traveled together have I seen you act this way. Why are you not telling me all of it, Karl?” He sounded exasperated.
“My business is my own,” Karl said sharply.
“Your business? Your business? Is not your business also mine? Aren’t you intertwined with Ramstad Yard?”
“I was, once,” Karl said, his voice rising to meet Peder’s. He changed tactics. “Was it ever going to be ours, Peder? I mean, really ours? Were you ever really going to get to my steamboat, or would there always be another schooner you wanted to get into the works first? Were you just playing me along, using me?”
Peder sputtered, and from her bed, Elsa could imagine his enraged face. “Do not take this path, Karl,” he warned. “You will regret it.”
“I already regret it,” Karl returned. “I regret ever planning a business with you. I’m leaving, Peder. It is better for both of us. I’m tired of living under the Ramstad umbrella like my father before me. I’m tired of competing with my best friend. Can we not part amicably?”
There was only silence in response.
“I wish you could see my side in this, Peder, I really do.” From the other side of the wall, it sounded as if Karl was walking toward the door. “You may send my shares in the Sunrise to an address in Saint Paul that I will forward to you.”
“Fine. If that’s your stance,” Peder said, “I am better off without you.”
There was si
lence for a moment. Then Karl spoke one last time, his voice low. “Yes. You are better off without me. Good-bye, Peder. God be with you. Bid good-bye to Elsa too.”
And with that he had gone. Elsa had not even glimpsed his face again, which left her feeling both relieved and uneasy. Was she supposed to go to him? Try and make amends? Find their footing in friendship again? She shook her head, staring blankly at the letter before her. There were no easy answers. And life seemed to just grow more and more complex. Please, Father, show me your path, she prayed, suddenly aware of her need.
Peder entered the cabin, glad to leave the glaring heat of the tropic sun. He found Elsa at the desk in the bedroom, her head in her hands, apparently in the midst of writing a letter.
“Hoping to get a letter off to Kaatje before we leave?” he asked, sitting on the bed. He closed his eyes for a moment. The dizziness was getting worse.
She turned in her chair to look at him, and he dimly registered the alarm on her face. “Apparently I look as bad as I feel,” he mumbled.
“Goodness, Peder, how long have you been ill?” She rushed to his side and eased him to his back, then bent to take off his boots.
“Since yesterday. But we must get going, Elsa,” he said, trying to rise.
She laughed. “Why now? We’ve been here well over a month. What’s another few days?”
“Cargo. Every day we lose is less money we will earn for the year. The Sunrise will need several voyages to pay for herself.” He wanted to moan with the effort of speech. “Of all the times for Karl to leave.” Peder lifted his hand to his head. Silently Elsa followed suit.
“You have a fever. Are you dizzy?”
“Yes.”
“What do you think it is?”
“Probably malaria. I’ve had it several times. That’s what it feels like. I’ll probably be indisposed for the next few days, love.”
“How can we sail if you are ill?”
“We’ll leave on the morrow with the first mate in command.”
“You have not named a first mate. Or are you promoting Riley?”
“No. Stefan, as second mate, is the logical choice. He will be my first mate. I’ve come to find out,” Peder managed, feeling the effort of every word, “that he is an accomplished sailor. He will see the Sunrise out of this harbor and to sea.”
Northern Lights Trilogy Page 23