Missing You, Missing Me

by Paige, Tylor

  The girl batted her eyes at him, but he didn’t see her. He was still holding eye contact with me. It was hot. I bit my bottom lip, and I felt my heart pick up pace.

  “Yeah, of course, over there next to the costumes,” she replied. He looked away and with a flick of his hand motioned for Christian, the redhead with the lumberjack beard to go to the dressing room. With a grin, he hurried to change into his new bottoms.

  One by one, they filed in and came out wearing only the elephant undies and their socks and shoes. The other customers were staring and laughing. Some took pictures. Spencer had bought a cowboy hat earlier to go with his new cowboy boots. The sunglasses completed the look. Mark was pale as paper with a farmer’s tan. Seth had been wearing long socks with his keds. Ethan was the last to come out, and even with his dick in an elephants trunk he still looked sexy with his black converses on. My eyes followed down his thin dark happy trail to the underwear. Who knew elephant undies could be sexy?

  The cashier stood behind them all, damn near panting. I swear she would have to wipe up her drool when we left. I had to admit, not one of them was ugly. They were all cute in their own ways. Adrian, the only naturally tan one took a step forward and began going through the lingerie racks and held up a few pieces that were almost nothing. The guys cheered or booed as he showed everybody his choices. Finally, he came to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

  “I think it’s only right that the guy taking it off should be the one to pick what you’ll be wearing tonight.” What? No.

  “Tonight?” I squeaked, my eyes wide. I shook my head, and they all turned their mouths up in evil smiles.

  “You’re looking at our costumes for tonight’s show, baby,” Adrian said. “Alright, Ethan step up and pick Cleo something good!” Ethan raised his eyebrows. After a second he got over the surprise and changed his face back to the sexy, confident man from before and started going through the racks. He finally found a black lace teddy. No, I couldn’t wear that out in public! It was padded on the breasts so you couldn’t see my nipples but still, the rest was lace. He handed it to me, and the guys all cheered.

  “You can keep your shorts. That’s it. If we’re wearing these,” he gestured to the elephant, “Then you can wear that,” he smirked as I snatched it out of his hand and stormed into the dressing room. I understood a deal was a deal, but I was still married. Chris would kill me if he saw guys picking out lingerie for me. But he would also kill me for fooling around with someone else. Maybe wearing this wouldn’t be as bad as I thought as I clipped the tights to the rest of it. Why did I even care about what he thought? We were done. He could have his girlfriend. I eyed myself in the mirror. I looked good. Really good. I was quite comfortable in the lingerie I was shocked at how natural it felt. I didn’t feel the need to cover myself up. This could work.

  I shimmied back into my jean shorts and came out with my arms raised. I spun around for them and handed the tag to the cashier who kept staring at Ethan's crotch. The guys went outside for cigarettes while I finished up. Before I gave her the cash, I spotted something dark red and fluffy. I grabbed it and finished my purchase.

  I had her keep the receipt and hurried out with the other guys. My clothes were in the bag that should have held the underwear I was now wearing on the streets of Dallas.

  The guys ran around, lunging, doing cartwheels. People stopped, some honked their horns. They were eating it up. Halfway back to our bus I stopped and grabbed Ethan. He paused, and I pulled the blood red feather boa out of my bag. It was just like the one from the drag show. He took a step back in surprise. Grinning ear to ear he wrapped it around his neck and ran to join the rest of the guys. Tonight’s show was going to be crazy. The fans will be in a frenzy once they see us. Suddenly an idea popped into my head. Oh, this was going to be fun.

  Adrian pulled back a bit and walked with me. “How does it feel?” He asked. I shrugged, flipping my hair behind my back to expose my bosom.

  “I think I’m going to get a weird tan, but there’s a nice breeze.” He laughed and shook his head.

  “I wasn’t talking about your teddy. By the way, how come you never wore one of those for me?” I punched his forearm.

  “If not my clothes, then what?” I said, ignoring his little quip.

  “Being in love.” I stopped and looked at him. I wasn’t in love. Was I? I’d admit my relationship with Ethan was nice. He was perfect for me.

  “I’m not in love,” I stated and started walking faster. He kept pace with me. He wasn’t letting this go apparently.

  “Don’t lie to me,” Adrian hissed. “Or are you lying to yourself? Cleo, he is crazy about you. Like over the moon. He’s doing everything he can to show you. Why don't you see it?” His face was angry. I turned away.

  “I have five weeks left before I have to see Christopher. I don’t know what to do, Adrian,” I said barely above a whisper. I didn’t want to think about going home, but I had to face him eventually.

  “Screw Chris. Just let him go. We have been best friends since I got caught stealing your newspaper off your porch. That was what, ten years ago now? Have I ever steered you wrong? Don’t be stupid Cleo. I love you. Please, for me. Let him in,” he begged me. I sighed and reached out to hold his hand.

  “I love you, Adrian. Thanks,” I told him, and we finished walking to the bus in silence away from the rest of the crew. Adrian's words never left me. I tried to push them out of my mind, but every time I looked at Ethan, I knew he was right.

  Ethan pulled me aside when we got back to the bus and thanked me for the boa with a hug and kiss. “You are seriously awesome.”

  “Keep it to remind yourself of me,” I said with a smile. He frowned.

  “Five more weeks,” he reminded himself, his voice suddenly serious. I nodded looking away guiltily.

  “Yeah, I know,” I said and dropped his hand. Somethings were better left unsaid. The countdown to the end of this was one of them.

  * * *

  Before the show, someone brought out baby oil, and the guys all insisted someone lather them up. Only Adrian and Ethan had any real muscles, so they all looked kind of ridiculous. What had me in tears was that I refused to help them and they couldn’t get anybody else to do it, so we had seven awkward guys in elephant undies and tube socks rubbing oil all over each other. I curled my hair and did my makeup but other than that I didn’t have much prep for the show.

  I didn’t tell any of the guys about my plans. I wanted their reactions to be genuine. I kissed Ethan quickly before our names were called. We decided we were going to march on to the stage in a line. That way we could each show off our costumes. The screams when the audience saw Adrian right behind me were deafening. Earlier I had asked the band to start playing as soon as we could, so we started our set pretty fast.

  I enjoyed the rush of wearing next to no clothing on stage. A tiny bit of me felt trashy, but after a few drinks I was kind of okay with it. I needed the courage for sure. I was completely exposed, there was no hiding any flaws tonight. Halfway through, while the guys were playing softly, I took the time to talk to the crowd.

  “Alright, Dallas! We have a treat for you tonight. I have right here on this stage three hot, single, men looking for love. They are all oiled up and ready for a nice girl, or guy in Adrian's case, he’s not picky, to take home tonight. So, let’s do this!” I shouted and jumped over to Derek who had the deer in the headlights look. Which I knew he would since none of them knew about this. I put my arm on his shoulder and moved the mic to my mouth again.

  “Derek here tells everyone his favorite movie is The Nightmare on Elm Street, but it’s really The Princess Bride,” I told the crowd. The fans screamed. “He’s looking for a tall drink of water with a thirst for his bass.”

  Derek’s eyes grew huge, and he shook his head. His face was growing red fast. He tried to hide his face behind his blond curls, but his new mohawk make it difficult. “The first girl to buy us a round of Jager bombs gets this sweet ass,” I c
alled as I spanked him hard. The crowd began to laugh at us.

  Derek jumped and grinned ear to ear as a pretty redhead brought us a tray of his favorite drink. I knew once the shock wore off they’d have fun with it. Security pulled her up, and Derek kissed her on the cheek as she was led backstage.

  I moved on to Mark. He was laughing hysterically but stopped short when I moved closer. While he was shaking his head no, I said, “Alright, now we have sweet, sweet Mark. Come on Mark and stand up. Let’s see that elephant.” He jumped up and sat back down quickly.

  “Mark once tried to convince a girl that he was the lead singer of Coldplay.” Laughter and screams filled the room. “Now, who’s going to buy us a round of fireball?” I asked the crowd and watched as a pretty caramel-colored girl with bright brown eyes was let through with a tray of Mark’s drink of choice.

  “I hate you!” Mark yelled my way, trying to be heard above the crowd. I winked at him and saw him crack a smile.

  Mark’s new date for the evening made it onto the stage. He kissed her on the cheek. Finally, I sauntered over to Adrian who was flexing and putting his leg up and asking fans if they wanted him. By this time, my words were becoming slurred. The adrenaline plus the alcohol was a buzz like no other. This was the best feeling ever.

  “Alright. I saved the best for last. Now, this hot piece of ass is worth more than just a round of drinks. Adrian, my dearest, most bestest friend,” I started, but Adrian grabbed his microphone and grinned.

  “Oh, I need no introduction. Ladies, gentlemen. I like tequila,” He said low and sultry. I had only heard that voice when he was working his powers of seduction on someone. I gave him a raised eyebrow.

  “Thanks, babe, but I got this,” he added, and we looked back at the crowd. They were going ballistic. I saw about twenty people running to the bar. Adrian pulled his guitar back around and went swiftly into a solo as we waited for a tall, cute guy who reminded me of Tarzan with his muscles and dreadlocks brought us all tequila shots.

  Adrian was so excited, he put his instrument down and hopped into this guys arms. Planting a huge kiss on his lips. It was adorable. Tarzan put him down, exiting the same way the others did. We resumed our show. Someone shouted they wanted to buy me, but I shook my head and winked at them.

  We staggered off the stage pretty damn drunk. It was a great show. It took me a minute to catch my bearings, but finally I found Ethan standing off to the side. I smiled at him and took a step to go to him, but his face was severe. He shook his head just ever so slightly it made me halt. He was standing in front of a table with a tray of rum shots and cups of ginger ale to chase it. He was going to buy me, I realized.

  “Wow, what a show!” The familiar voice made me freeze. No wonder Ethan was acting strangely. I turned around to be face-to-face with the man I had been dreading to see. The one who I had spent my summer hating. My husband was here.

  “Babe, you look smoking!” He grabbed me, squeezing the air out of me. I wanted to throw up. Why was he here? I looked into his face and only felt disgust. I pulled away and just stared at him, dumbfounded. The alcohol in my system was starting to come back up. Did he think I forgot about his naked ass in the air as he plugged that pretty redhead in our bed? He looked concerned. I was feeling sick. Was he upset? Did I hurt his feelings? Was I supposed to feel bad?

  “Hey, I rented a room about ten minutes away. Why don’t you stay with me tonight?” Chris asked me. “I’ve missed my wife,” he whispered in my ear seductively. Did he forget why we weren’t talking? Was he that delusional? I shook my head, but my drunkenness made me dizzy. Christopher grabbed my waist hard to steady me. His fingers dug into my side. I felt like I was going to pass out.

  “I have to stay to finish the show,” I mumbled. He scoffed, putting his hands up in exasperation.

  “You just played. Let’s go,” he repeated, but I pulled away.

  “No, Chris. I have to go back out to sing my new song. That’s how we end the show,” I told him, eying his reaction carefully. His face revealed nothing.

  “Fine. I’ll wait here with you,” he said. We went to the lounge to join my bandmates. They were hanging with their dates. Mark was flirting with his girl, while Derek’s new friend was sitting on his lap. Adrian and Tarzan sat on the other side of the room drinking beer and just talking. They looked like old friends.

  When I walked in with Chris, the room grew silent. My husband nodded towards them and went for a bottle of water out of the small fridge. He gave me one, and we stood around, feeling slightly awkward as we waited for the cue to go back to the stage. When it was time I asked him if he wanted to watch and he glared at me.

  “I’ve heard the song,” he said coolly. Guilt hit me hard. It was cruel for me to flaunt it right in front of him. I nodded and went to finish the show.

  Tonight the chemistry between Ethan and I on stage was terrible. We were both tense and aware of who was behind the curtains. Our kiss at the end was passionless, and we moved away from each other as soon as we could.

  I rushed to find Chris as soon as I finished. He was standing right behind the curtain tapping his foot. He looked furious.

  “Can we go now?” he asked, irritated. I looked over at my crew. They were preoccupied with their dates.

  “Yeah, sure,” I said before anyone stopped us.

  We started towards the exit, where Ethan happened to be standing. I tried to pull away, but Christopher held my arm tight. He stopped at the table where Ethan, still clad only in his elephant underwear, was holding drinks just watching us. Christopher was in a sharp gray suit like he had just come from a meeting. The stark differences in the two men made my stomach lurch. My husband picked up one of the shots and downed it quickly.

  “Thanks, bud,” he told Ethan, slamming the glass back down with a clink. He looked Ethan up and down, smirking. I couldn’t help but feel embarrassed for him. This was not the greatest time to meet. Ethan looked uncomfortable. He shifted his body and gulped. Oh no, this was not good, I thought. “You’re the guy from the video,” Chris said to Ethan. Ethan nodded.

  “Yeah. Uh, Ethan. You must be Chris,” he said eventually. Putting the other glass down Ethan extended his hand. Christopher glanced at it, but refused to shake it. Ethan was beneath him. I knew how he thought.

  “You’re a good actor. People are eating it up,” he said. The words were innocent enough, but the look in his eyes when he looked at Ethan was deadly.

  Ethan nodded again, crossing his arms and leaning against the table trying to seem relaxed. “The fans love it,” he said. Chris scoffed, raising his eyebrow to Ethan.

  “That’s who you’re doing it for, right? The fans. They dreamed up this whole fantasy romance between you two, and you’re just giving them what they want.” His voice was losing its control. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.

  “Look, man, I don’t know what you…” Ethan started, but Chris put his hand up.

  “I don’t need to hear your excuse. I feel like I should remind everyone that I’m the man she married. Not you. Do what you need to do to feed that crowd, but remember at the end of the day, she’s my wife,” Chris said with a finality that said the conversation was over.

  Ethan kept his eyes on Chris. After a moment, he nodded and looked away. Chris pulled me out the door before I could argue. I stumbled over my feet to keep up. I looked back, but Ethan was gone. It was Chris and I alone now. The cold air hit my face, helping my stomach. I was able to think for a second. Pulling away from my husband’s grasp, I glared at him.

  “What are you doing here Chris? I can’t deal with you right now!” I started walking away from him, going nowhere in particular. He caught up to me and snatched my arm twisting me around. I gasped in pain. He was using a lot of force.

  “Why can’t I visit my wife, huh?” he said. “I had business in Dallas and figured you’d want to see me. It’s been two months. I know you can’t go that long without me.” He pulled me close and planted his scorching hot lips on mi
ne, pressing hard on them. I couldn’t breathe. I fought his grip and finally got away.

  “No, I can’t do this Chris. Where’s Holly? Why don’t you go spend time with her before I come back for my stuff,” I snarled as I wiped away his spit.

  He looked like I had slapped him. Surprise was in his eyes. A shadow passed over his face.

  “I ended it with her the day you saw us. It’s only you, Cleo. I can’t lose you. Please, I’ve changed. I swear. Come with me and we can talk,” he pleaded.

  I couldn’t think. There were too many thoughts swimming around in my head. Ethan, Christopher, Holly, Adrian, Duchess. Everyone was screaming at me and telling me what to do. I opened my eyes again and saw my husband’s face. He looked like he was telling the truth for once. His gray eyes were soft and seemed genuinely sorry for what he had done.

  Despite my anger, I had missed him, I realized. With a giant sigh, I followed him to his rental car. I let him help me in, and I watched out the window as the band came out and looked my way. I shrugged, giving them a weak smile before I turned away quickly. They had their dates with them, so they wouldn’t say anything about it until morning. We liked to keep things like this private. I didn’t want to read about it on the internet or a magazine later.

  Chris drove us to a restaurant. He helped me out and to a table where he ordered for me. Typical Christopher. I didn’t like salads. I’d much rather have some nachos or a burger.

  “I need you by my side right now,” he started, “Don’t end our marriage because of something stupid, Cleo.”

  “What do you consider what you did?” I retorted, ready to leave again.

  “An innocent mistake. Men have little affairs all the time. But that’s it. They never leave their wives for their mistresses,” he smiled. I stared at him blankly. He couldn’t be serious right now. Seeing that I wasn’t rushing into his arms, his eyes grew small, and his face turned hard.

  “I’ve given you everything. You wouldn’t have the house, the car, or your studio without me. You have access to my bank account, and I don’t complain. You have it good with me. Don’t throw us away because of this. We can make it work if you’re willing.”