by Fiona Gibson
The pack zooms ahead. Are they on steroids or what? They must have taken some kind of drug. If I survive this I’m insisting on tests. Right now, though, a sharp pain is spearing my side, making my breath come in agonising gasps. ‘Go for it, Laura!’ cries one of the dads, in the way that people cheer on the unfortunate child in the sack race who’s staggering behind, swathed in hessian, and finally makes it to the finishing line streaming with tears and snot after everyone else has gone home.
There’s cheering, and I glimpse Naomi punching the air in triumph at the finishing line. My bra straps have slipped down, and my boobs are boinging obscenely as I thunder onwards. I glance down to assess their bounceage, and when I look up something’s terribly wrong, because Jed is standing there. Jed, who should be at his own school, not witnessing the ritual humiliation of his wife. Worse still, he’s standing next to Celeste, that new teacher with whom he’s clearly besotted, although he acts all blasé (overly-blasé, I’d say) whenever her name pops up. Gorgeous, honey-skinned Celeste who, to top it all, is half-sodding-French.
I keep running, telling myself that they can’t be here, laughing and standing all jammed up together. It’s just some terrible vision caused by over-exerting myself. And they say exercise is good for you. No one mentions the fact that your chest feels as if it could burst open and you start hallucinating.
I glance back to check. Celeste is gazing up at Jed and fiddling with a strand of hair at her face. Anyone would think she’s his cute, doe-eyed girlfriend in her polka-dot skirt and sweet lemon cardi. She reaches out to pick something – a stray thread, perhaps – off Jed’s top. Grooming him, like a mating monkey. It’s sickeningly intimate. He smiles tenderly at her. Whenever I try to pick something off him, he bats me away as if I’m a wasp.
I charge on like a heifer, boiling with rage, my boobs lolloping agonisingly as I try to recall the last time Jed smiled adoringly at me. I can’t remember. It’s so horrifying to see him looking at her that way that for an instant I forget where I am. I lose my footing, skidding on the muddied pitch and lurching forwards with arms outstretched, belly-flopping with a splatter onto the ground.
Dear God, kill me now.
I lie still, waiting for my life to flash before me. A lump of dirt, or possibly a live bug, has worked its way up my nose. With my eyes squeezed tightly shut, I’m poised to transcend to some heavenly Celeste-free zone, where no one is ever forced to take part in a mums’ race.
FIONA GIBSON · MUM ON THE RUN
The dreaded mums’ race at school sports day – every mother’s worst nightmare.
Laura Swan hopes to wriggle out of it – but her daughter’s not taking ‘no’ for an answer. Racing against the super-fit mums is bad enough. What Laura hadn’t bargained for was spotting her husband Jed, smirking on the sidelines with his delectable colleague Celeste …
Laura decides it’s time for drastic action. She steals her son’s trainers, drags herself around the local park – and gets a lot more than she bargained for when she finds herself a cute new running buddy in Danny …
Is Laura falling hopelessly in love? And is it normal for a mother of three to buy saucy lingerie in the supermarket? Mum on the Run will have you cheering Laura on as she desperately tries to rediscover her true self – and her pre-motherhood, wobble-free tum.
From the bestselling author of Mummy Said the F-word and Lucky Girl.
£6.99
ISBN: 978-1-84756-249-4
Copyright
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
AVON
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A Paperback Original 2012
1
First published in Great Britain by
HarperCollinsPublishers 2012
Copyright © Fiona Gibson 2012
Fiona Gibson asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
EPub Edition © February 2012 ISBN: 9780007461714
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