by Jessie Wolf
I think I might have lost control a little bit, because the P.P.C. in my right arm was deployed. One look was all junior needed to run like hell for the hanger door. As I take a deep breath in to calm myself and retract the offending weapon, I hear something very strange. Looking around at the others in the room I see that they're clapping. I swear I blush clear down to my toes. I've never been so embarrassed for losing my temper in my life.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, please forgive me for that unladylike display of temper.” I ask with all modesty.
The Major from Intel. Security gave me a look of total respect, and then smiled at me. “Cmdr. Owens. Ma'am, I can safely say on behalf of all those here, that you can lose your temper like that any time you want, as long as the target of your anger richly deserves it, as Vic. Lord Blackstone did. He had no reason for screaming or challenging you the way he did.”
“Excuse me. But did you say his name was Blackstone? As in Kiel and Blackstone shipping? Duce Blackstone of the Royal Family Blackstone?” I ask, with some excitement in my voice.
“Yes ma'am, I believe so. Why?”
Great, just great. Now I know how General Stonewall got his posting of Lord High Marshal here, as well as why. For years I've wondered how, after that disastrous operation on Haven Mist, he was not pulled in for a summery inquisition and courts marshal. By all rights he should have been hung by the neck until dead for that mistake. But now I know. I also know who was behind the cover up. Finally after all this time the murderer of my child and her husband is within my grasp.
“Do not let that son of a bitch get off this base. That is a direct order. Do you hear me Maj?”
She might not know what is going on but she did know that, at that point in time, I was the supreme authority in this system. So with a quick salute she raced outside to Cpt. Howard to pass along my orders.
“Excuse me ma'am. But can I ask you a question?” It was the Head of Space Port Security.
“Yes sir. What it you would like to know?” I can tell he is trying to figure out what’s going on right now, and has no idea of how to ask. Smiling, I say, “Go ahead and spit it out as blunt or crude as you like, sir. Trust me. In my past I've said or heard just about every foul word there is sometimes even used to describe me, to my face.” I have to giggle at the look on his face.
“Ok ma'am, you asked for it. For those of us who aren't part of the High Command, how in the Name of the Nine Gates of Hell can a Battalion Commander, who has been retired for more than 50 years, just walk in here and relieve the Lord High Marshal of a planet, along with his Vic. Lord without a trial? Especially one with ties to the High Families.” I can tell the poor man had to know the truth along with everyone else here.
It must be the new type of hormone mixture running through my blood system. Or maybe the Reboot did something to my brain. Even the Secondary Configuration Protocol rearranged my neural pathways. But whatever it is, it’s screwing with my ability to make rational decisions, because I'm about to break all Opsec. Rules and Regulations in the book.
“Alright folks, here is the skinny. My real rank is, or I should say was, First High Lord of the Death Dealers Divisions for the Delta Sector. In other words, I never fully retired; I've just been on inactive Reserve.” From the number of gasps I can tell they weren’t expecting that. “But all that aside, I still... no let me correct that... WE still have a massive problem to deal with. Because let’s face facts, I no longer look like Mr. James J. Owens, 97 year old grandfather, let alone one High Lord James J. Owens. So let’s get to work making me a real person on paper again, please.”
With several loud and motivated Ma’ams, yes Ma’am’s, everyone got down to work creating a back ground for one Maiha Mana Steel Heart. Meaning, yours truly. While everyone was busy working on my new back ground I went back to the hanger office for some privacy and more coffee.
“Ok Dee De. I am pretty sure we'll have a few moments to ourselves so we can have a nice little talk with no one butting in.”
If you want total privacy I suggest that you lock the door there kiddo.
“That's just one of the things that we are going to discuss, that kiddo crap, but I really can't lock the door because the coffee pot in this place is in here. I know that one of those youngsters in there will want a cup sooner or later. Besides after I get this refill I’m going outside to see if I can bum another smoke off of Cpt. Howard and his team.”
Well if you want a cigarette there are two packs and some matches in the last cabinet on the right behind some Tec manuals.
“Just how do you know that, you old biddy?”
The first time we come in here the C.O.B.R.A. O.S. was still operating remember. Well it scanned the entire area and cataloged the contents of all the cabinets. What it found I know. All that info in cataloged, sorted and stored for later retrieval. So there you go it’s that simple.
“Whoa that is just too cool. What the Hell over? Can you explain to me why I'm thinking, acting, and talking like some idiot teenager now, or better yet, why I'm like, checking out all the cute guys and gals round here?”
Damn it! I did it again! What is going on with me here? I mean I’m letting my emotions over rule my reasoning and judgment. I’ve never allowed that in the past. Why I am I doing it now? For some reason I started to cry. At first just one or two tears then all of a sudden the dam broke and the flood waters came pouring out. With my back against the door I slide down it until I was sitting on the floor crying my eyes out for no reason.
Hey, hey, calm down Maiha, calm down honey, you can get through this.
“How do YOU know? You're not losing YOUR mind, you tin plated bitch!!”
Because you're not going crazy, or losing your mind, so calm down get a hold of yourself and use your head girl. Think! You have over 87 years of life experience at your disposal. You just have to relax, calm down and think, honey.
After about 15 minutes, I wipe the last tears from my eyes, breathe in deep, and count to 100 in Croatian. Did it again three more times before I was back in control of my emotions. As I sit here on the floor I finally understand what Matsu Me always meant by 'Having a good cry.”
Getting up off the floor, I go over to the cabinet that has the cigarettes hidden in it and dig them out. Yup, my luck is still going strong. Black Hawk Kings menthols no less. A fouler tasting cigarette you'd be hard pressed to find. Now I know why nobody has bothered to steal them. But beggars can't be choosers, as the old saying goes. I get a fresh cup of coffee, grab the two packs and head outside.
Spotting Cpt. Howard over by his suit, I head over, hoping to trade the two Hawks for half a pack of Gold’s.
“Excuse me Cpt. Howard; can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Sure thing ma'am. What can I do for you?”
“I can't talk you into swapping me half of your Gold’s for two whole packs of Black Hawks, can I?”
Looking down at me, with a wondering look on his face, he asks quietly. “Did you get them out of the last cabinet on the right?”
“Uh, yeah, I did. Why?”
“Oh no reason, but the going rate for those packs is 2 for 1, little lady. Something must have crossed my face, because the next thing he says is. “Oh My God ma'am, I'm so sorry! I didn’t mean that 'little lady' comment, it just slipped out. I mean, with the way you look and all, I forgot I was talking to an officer. I would never be disrespectful of any fellow officer, but with you looking so cute and all..... The poor man turned white as a sheet as he realized what he just said.
I can't help it, I start laughing. I mean the whole situation is so bizarre that it is almost total slap-stick in a way that is beyond belief. After a few more seconds, even Howard is laughing, himself. Once we calm down and get control of ourselves we get back down to business.
“Would you care to tell me why the exchange rate for these packs is 2 to1, Cpt.?” I say.
“That’s simple ma'am. Only the truly desperate would smoke those. They've been in that same spot for
over seven years, ever since the last maintenance Chief put them there, and back then the swap rate was 2 to 1. It’s kind of become a tradition to keep that rate in honor of the Chief. So if you'll give me just a sec, I'll get you a pack out of my suit and then you just put those back where you found them.”
“Sure, no problem Cpt. I'll be right back.” I say, as I run back inside to return the two packs to where they belong. Once back outside, Cpt. Howard hands a pack of his E.P.G.s and some matches.
“Oh ma'am. I know that you're really a lot older than you look, but I think that you might want save these cigarettes.”
“Why do you say that?” I ask.
“Its simple ma'am. No T.A.B.C. store clerk is going to sell to someone who looks like they aren't old enough to drive yet.” He said with a straight face.
Oh hell. Everyone and I mean everyone, from this point on, will only see me as a teenage girl, not as a grown man of almost a hundred. Shit! Bite me! I have to grow up all over again. Thanking the Cpt. I head back inside to drink my coffee and talk to Dee De.
“Dee De did you realize that I am going to have too grow up all over again?”
Are you finally ready to talk to me again?
“Yes, I am, and by the way, sorry about earlier. I don't know what came over me. I have never been that emotional before. Do you have any theories as to what is going on with me?”
Maiha I think I do know what is going on but I don’t think you’ll like the answer. So I’m going to ask you if you really want to know.
“Dee De I want you to do me a favor. I want you to look back at the 20 years that we had together, but before the higher ups put you into sleep mode. Have you done that hone?”
Yes.
“Ok now. Did I ever order you to withhold any information for me or the troops under my command?”
No. you always wanted the truth no matter how good, bad or ugly it was.
“That's right, and if you will dig back into that outdated file cabinet you call a data base, you'll find the one order that I never rescinded was for you to never lie or withhold the truth from me, correct?”
Outdated filing cabinet I call a database?!! Listen here, you pint sized, unholy terror! Just who do you think you’re calling outdated? You will pay for that comment!
“I believe you my dear sweat Dee De.” I giggled. “After all, right now you are the oldest, still operating D.D.AI out there. I know that all of those from our class, and those before it, along with their hosts, have passed on to the happy hunting grounds. So that does make us both outdated and a bit antiquated, my dear. But would you really hold a grudge against a sweet and innocent little girl like me?”
SWEET! INNOCENT! You are no such thing!
D.D.A.I.: PROSSESSING
*
D.D.A.I.: TOTAL NUMBER OF FIRST GENERATION OMEGA / ASSULT CLASS 1
D.D.A.I.: TOTAL NUMBER OF NEWER AND CURRENT CLASSES OF A.I.4 NEW CLASSES ONLY 1 IN USE
Now that is a sobering bit of data. We really are the last of the best aren't we?
“Yes my dear, we are. The High Command found out how truly powerful all of the Omega classes Dealers were by the end of the War with the Din Bowen Confederation. The power that was held by the Omega class is truly frightening. Even you must acknowledge this, Dee De.”
Ok, I'll give you that. Hell, the fact that I was able to reactivate, plus reboot and reconfigure into the secondary configuration, is proof of that. Which brings us back to the original topic. When I was looking for the off switch for the C.O.B.R.A. o.s., I found that one of the things it does, is it gives the host the ability to not only have hyper quick reflexes, but to act in the same manner as the populace in which the host is seeking to hide. This is done through a behavioral modification program, based on the targeted populaces behavior and customs. That is down loaded directly into the hosts’ brain.
“Are you saying that, during the Secondary Reconfiguration and Reboot, that piece of backyard garage software brain washed me to act like a teenage girl, because the largest part of Hades is populated by Asian teenage girls?!”
In a word, yes.
Great Just Fracking Great! Any more good news about what those two pieces of shit programs did to me?”
Well seeing as how the majority of the teenage girls of Hades are Bi-Sexual no not really I think that about covers everything the Reboot and Secondary Configure did.
“Dee De, did you just say that I am most likely to be Bi-Sexual?
Hum... Yes, I believe I did. Is this a problem?
“Dee De you just don’t...Oh never mind. I'll deal with it when the time comes, but it does answer quite a few questions that I had.”
I get up and get myself a refill from the coffee pot over on the counter. While I’ve been having this conversation with Dee De, several of the former Lord High Marshal’s staff have been in and out, getting a cup themselves, so I decide to make a fresh pot and go back to talking with Dee De, but before I do, I get me another smoke out and fire it up. After taking a long drag I exit here and get back to Dee De.
“Alright Dee De, I think I can deal with all the weirdness that the reboot is going to put me through, but there are a few things I need to know and you are the only source on this topic. Seeing as how I don't have an owner’s manual for this new body, let’s do a full run down on each system, shall we?”
Give me a few moments to compile the data into a readable format for you, and then we'll go over each one individually.
D.D.A.I.: PROCESSING...
*
D.D.A.I.: COMPLETE
D.D.A.I.: UP LODING
*
D.D.A.I.: FULL PRINTOUT OF SECONDARY CONFIGURATION
WEAPONS:
PARTICLE PROJECTION CANNON
PLASMA LASER RIFLE
CLOSE QUARTERS COMBAT CLAWS L&R ARMS
ANTI PERSONIEL LASERS L&R INDEX AND LITTLE FINGERS
SONIC DISRUPTERS L&R UPPER CHEST
ARMOR:
ARMORED SKIN COVERING CLASS 5 PROTECTION
COMMUNICATION ASSETS:
COMBAT CONTROL COMMUNICATION CENTER ACCESS LEVEL 5
INTER NET ACCESS UNLIMITED
RADAR DETECTION AND TARGETING 360 DEGREES
C.O.B.R.A. O.S.
PHYSICAL UP GRADES
JUMP ASSIST JETS L&R LOWER BACK
TRACTION ASSIST PADS IN BOTH PALMS OF HANDS AND SOLES OF FEET
STRENGH ASSIST UP TO 4500LBS
SPEED ASSIST 85MPH CRUSE 110MPH BURST
END OF LINE.
Ok Maiha this is what I’ve got on all of the modifications to our basic configuration. For starters the P.P.C. and P.L.R. can be configured to be both the primary weapon, but not both at the same time.
“Are you telling me that I have a choice between using a battering ram or cannon for my primary weapon?”
In a word, yes.
“Alright let’s give priority to the P.L.R. I know that it will recharge quicker and, if I get into a firefight that can mean the difference between life and death. Ok, on to the next big bit. The C.Q.C. claws and anti-personnel lasers. Just what the hell are those?”
The claws are 8x2 inch combat blades stored in your forearms that can be extended for use in C.Q.C. or the silent removal of an opponent .The a.p. lasers are just that. Lasers in the index and pinky fingers of each hand. You are able to target up to four different opponents at one time.
“So if I am facing multiple opponents then I have a chance to win... is that what you’re saying?”
Basically, Yes. Now for the sonic disrupters in the chest. They produce an ultra-high frequency sound wave that attacks the nervous systems of anyone within range, rendering them comatose.
“Holy shit! You mean to tell me I have a shatter rock band in my chest?”
Not quite but that is a good comparison, honey. (Giggle)
“Hey, I know that is not what you meant, but you know how much I hate shatter rock. Ok, what’s up with the C3 suit and radar tracking stuff?”
Well, wh
at I can figure out is this. In our current configuration you were meant to operate on your own using the local populace as rebel troops. Now because of this fact you were not meant to be on the front lines, but act as more of a command and control adviser.
“Now that makes the most sense of anything else you’ve shown me or told me in the last 30 minutes. Now, I can basically tell what all that physical upgrade stuff is, but what are traction assist pads?”
Those are for climbing walls hills and cliffs my dear. They will give you a much better grip on whatever surface you have to climb.
“Cool! That can come in real handy. Now, is there any way to turn off or disguise this armored skin covering? I really don't feel like walking around as a teenage boy's anime wet dream all of the time.”
I've been working on that and I think I have figured it out. There is a command file for controlling the armor skin. All you should have to do is say out loud, 'disengage armor.' Now while the skin armor your weapon will still be accessible if needs be.
“Alright! I can get out of this cat suit. Disengage Armor!” With that I feel a tingling sensation all along my body where the armor was. I look down and get the shock of a life time. I was naked as the day I was born. YYYEEEIIIKKKEESSS! I have to admit, not one of the finer moments in my life, nor graceful for that matter.
“Frack it all to Hell!!! Dee De you should have told me I would be naked as the day I was born Dagnabit! Don’t tell me that you didn't know about that either, you tin plated ass clown.”
(Giggle) I told you I would get even, love. Now you know the first rule when it comes to being a woman. Don’t get mad, get even... and when possible, one up! (Giggle)
Now any intelligent person would have thought to revise the previous command at that point right then and there. Unfortunately for me, I was a little distracted by getting mad at Dee De. And of course my luck being what it is. Basically if I didn't have bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all. So here I am, butt ass naked, and who should come waltzing into the hanger office but my favorite male officer and A.P.S. Pilot, Cpt. Howard. Excuse me ma'am. But there’s a Mr. Randal Reed here to... Woah!!
The poor man stops dead in his tracks and mid-sentence upon getting a good look at me. He turns beet red and quickly does an about face. Me, I try to cover up and find a place to hide all at the same time. Of course Dee De just has to get in one last dig before letting me reengage the skin armor to cover up my body.