by Kristie Cook
" What? What are you saying…?" I shook my head, knowing already.
"Lucas is your…"
Whop! The breath flew out of me. I felt like I'd just been punched in the stomach.
"I…I…I'm Daemoni ?!" I choked on the words. A heavy weight pressed down on my chest, making my breaths shallow. Tristan's words from long ago echoed in my ears… pure evil … real demons … soldiers and followers of Satan himself. It flows through my blood? I jumped up and paced the living room, shaking my arms out, as if I could throw the hideousness off of me. "No! No, no, no !"
" You are Amadis , through and through. Do not forget that!" Rina's voice thundered in my head. I stopped and glared at her through the tears in my eyes. She spoke aloud with calm surety, "Alexis, you are not Daemoni. You have Lucas's blood, but you are completely Amadis. All of your powers, all of your qualities, everything that makes you one of our most powerful descendents yet, are all good and righteous."
"How do you know that? How do you know for sure ?" I demanded, throwing my arms up in emphasis.
"We evaluated you as a baby. I felt it again when you first walked in…when I took your hand, I assessed you. The evil is fully suppressed; I can hardly feel anything."
I didn't feel any better. The questions flying through my head panicked me.
"And what about when I change over? Do you know for sure I'll be like you ? That I'll be good ? What if I don't change? Or what if the evil strengthens with the Ang'dora ? Do you have those answers?" The thought of being anything different than myself or Mom…anything evil …terrified me. I choked on the idea as if it were a physical object lodged in my throat.
Rina shook her head and admitted, "No, we do not have those answers. You are unique. But your powers are so strong, we are confident you will be perfect… magnificent ."
" You might not be here otherwise ," she said in my head. I recoiled, startled.
They would have killed me.
" Quite possibly ," she answered silently. I stared at her, not realizing she could hear my thoughts, and she nodded. That put things into perspective. If I was evil, I would've been a threat to them, but they didn't feel that. In fact, they expected me to lead them in some distant future.
I fell back into the loveseat and dropped my head into my hands. Tristan rubbed my back. Why isn't he mortified? Then I remembered he'd already known and still loved me, even came looking for me. I realized why he'd been so adamant about telling me he loved me no matter what. Of course, he was Daemoni. I turned my head toward him.
"Ha!" I barked hysterically. "I guess we really are perfect for each other."
He rolled his eyes.
I tried to tell myself I was physically no different than I'd been twenty minutes ago, just more knowledgeable. I closed my eyes, focused on that thought and tried to control my breathing and pulse.
" There you go ," Rina's voice soothed in my head.
"Can we take another break?" I finally asked when I felt control.
I refilled my glass with ice water and chugged the entire glass, though the cold made my head hurt, then I escaped to the bathroom. I splashed cold water on my face and caught my reflection in the mirror. Do I look any different? I couldn't help but wonder. I stared into my brown eyes, looking so much like Mom's and Rina's, but wondering if they really were. As I studied myself in the mirror, looking for signs of Daemoni, my stomach heaved and I barely caught the toilet as I vomited. The water mixed with the red wine looked like blood swirling in the white porcelain bowl. I wished it was the Daemoni blood pouring out of me.
I sat on the floor, breathing deeply. I really wanted to take a hot shower, thinking soap, scalding water and a lot of scrubbing would remove any evil from my system. I'm being irrational. I'm no different than I was. I just need to get over this. Someone knocked on the door and before I could answer, it opened and closed as Mom squeezed into the bathroom with me. I scooted against the bathtub and she slid down to the floor next to me.
"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.
"I think so," I whispered, a half-truth.
She put her arms around me. "I would say I'm sorry, but I'm really not, because I have you."
I didn't know what to say, so I just hugged her back and we cried on each other's shoulders for several minutes, until there was another knock on the door. It opened slightly, catching against Mom's foot, and Rina slipped in. She closed the door behind her and leaned against it. She studied our tear-soaked faces.
"You two have a very close relationship. I am glad to see that," Rina said. She smiled sadly at Mom. "I am sorry we never had that."
"Me, too," Mom said, but she waved her hand in dismissal. "It was a different time then. We had different challenges to deal with."
"Well, we all face the same obstacles now." Rina eyed us appreciatively. "Together we can overcome them. Nothing can thwart the power of the three of us together."
She held her hands out to us and we each took one. She was surprisingly strong—it shouldn't have startled me but it did—and she lifted both of us to our feet. She put her arms around us. "We are Amadis ! All of us."
An unusual, powerful sensation charged through her arm into me. I instinctively knew at once it was Amadis power. And my body reacted positively to it, absorbing the warm and potent feeling into every cell. Yes, I AM Amadis. Rina smiled at me with that thought.
We stood there, three generations arm-in-arm, until someone else knocked on the door.
"We still have a lot to discuss," Stefan said from the other side.
We all sighed, our moment over. Mom and Rina stepped out while I quickly rinsed my mouth with water and gargled with mouthwash. When I caught my reflection in the mirror again, I saw a new strength in my eyes. The same strength as in the eyes of my kin—Mom and Rina. Amadis power.
Chapter 20
Tristan caught me in the hallway when I came out of the bathroom. He took my face in his hands and searched my eyes. I smiled.
"You're okay." It wasn't a question.
"I'm perfect. You?"
"Perfect." He brushed his lips against mine. I hoped the mouthwash did its job. "I told you. I love you no matter what."
"I know. I love you, too."
Solomon studied my face and Stefan briefly looked at me as I sat down again. I smiled at them both and their expressions relaxed. Solomon, especially, intimidated me, but I knew he was good. And Stefan emanated power, a good power, nearly as appealing as Rina's. It still bugged me, though, how he felt familiar. And, even more, how he had a hard time bringing his eyes to mine.
He picked up where we left off…before I got punched in the stomach.
"As I was saying, the Daemoni believe it would be useful to have both Alexis and Tristan under their power. With Lucas's blood and Amadis royalty, Alexis will be nearly—if not equally—as powerful as Tristan. They believe there is a chance Alexis could come to their side and Tristan would follow her."
"Which I would do," Tristan muttered.
"No, we will not let that happen," Rina said. "Tristan, what do you see as the best solution?"
He stiffened and his jaw clamped audibly. Repeating what he'd told me earlier, he said through gritted teeth, "It is not an option."
"If it is the best, then we must know it so we can all consider it," Solomon said.
Tristan glared at him. His voice held that steely undertone as he spoke. "The best solution for Alexis's safety and long-time survival of the Amadis is for me to go back to the Daemoni. They'll leave you all alone for a long time. Alexis will have to find another mate."
" NO! " I cried.
"Absolutely not!" Rina said.
"Not an option," Solomon agreed. "What is the next one?"
Tristan chuckled grimly. "Definitely not an option. Alexis and I both go to them. They leave the Amadis alone. There's a chance we can still be together, have a child and possibly escape."
Mom and Rina gasped.
"Not an option," Solomon repeated harshly. "Give us something
we can actually do ."
"You wanted to know." Tristan took a deep breath. "Besides those two, I really can't come up with anything except protect Alexis and fight if and when necessary. If they go with any of their options, I believe it'll be the last one. That one serves their purpose the most."
"I agree," Stefan said. "We need to ensure they cannot even get close to Alexis. It will be much easier to abduct her than to kill her."
"Then that is what we will do," Rina said decisively. "We have Tristan, Sophia and Owen here. Solomon, make arrangements for at least one more protector at all times. Stefan, continue your recognizance and stay on top of their plans. And keep watch on everything here."
"I do not think they will act immediately," Stefan said. "It will be a difficult maneuver, very risky for them. They may never follow through on it."
"There are always rogues," Tristan said.
"And Vanessa," Mom added. The name ringed in my head as if I should know it, but I couldn't place it.
"Vanessa could become a problem," Tristan said, "but the rogues are a bigger threat. It's their nature to disobey and do their own thing. And they may take one of the other options."
"You need more protection, too, Tristan, in case they do take another path," Rina responded. "You are planning on marrying Alexis, no?"
"Yes," Tristan answered.
"You should do it soon," Solomon said. "Marrying royalty will bind you closer to the Amadis. You will become a member of the royal family and they cannot attack royalty."
"That will be done on our terms," Tristan said firmly, squeezing my hand.
Solomon narrowed his eyes at Tristan. "The sooner the better."
"It just needs to be done under Amadis power," Rina said. "You can delay your legal wedding if you need time to prepare, but marriage vows should be exchanged before the Amadis sooner rather than later to strengthen that bond."
"Let's do it now. I'm ready," I said.
"Alexis!" Mom gasped.
Tristan glared at me. "We'll discuss this later."
"Yes, we'll discuss it first," Mom said.
"If it helps you…," I said to Tristan.
"That is not the reason we'll be getting married," he growled. I knew that tone and decided we wouldn't argue this in front of everyone.
"We will discuss this," I promised and added, "sooner, not later."
"Alexis, you need to thoroughly understand this," Rina said, changing the subject. She didn't have to hear Tristan's thoughts to know he wouldn't budge at the moment—his body language made it clear. "I know it will not be easy, but you must not ever be alone. You are their primary target and you are also our most vulnerable. Until the Ang'dora , you will not be able to defend yourself. Do not worry about Sophia or Tristan or any of the others. We can all protect ourselves and you. You focus on keeping yourself safe, which means staying with one of us at all times."
"I understand." I swallowed hard when I thought about the only activity I did alone—write. I mumbled it under my breath…I thought. "I guess my book is out of the question now."
"That's absurd!" Mom said. "You will finish that book and we will get it published."
"Yes, you need to move forward with that," Rina agreed. I stared at her in disbelief. "Your writing and story-telling ability is one of your special gifts, Alexis, and we would never ask you not to use a gift. We know it will be used for good."
"She should use a nom-de-plume," Tristan said. "It probably wouldn't do any good, but it could divert attention from her."
"No, we want the Daemoni to know," Solomon said. "They will feel threatened by the boldness."
I felt uncomfortable with the way they spoke. I felt a layer of meaning that I wasn't grasping hovering under the surface. Tristan didn't help.
"I don't like it," he said. "It's too risky."
"It is necessary," Rina said with finality. She spoke in my head, " Your purpose, for now, is to write your stories. They will help us. That is all you need to know right now. "
I nodded. Although completely confused, I could easily accept that writing was my purpose. In fact, I'd always felt it in my heart. And I was glad I had a way to serve them, even if I didn't understand how—that I could do something besides sit around with a babysitter.
"She will continue with school, too," Mom said firmly.
"Whatever is a part of her normal life, yes," Rina agreed. "We cannot show any fear."
"So we can stay here?" I asked hopefully.
"Yes, you are safe here, at least for now," Stefan answered. "Tristan, keep your house. It is built for protection from the elements and it will be a safe place should we need it. We would prefer you kept Alexis there with you."
"We'll work that out," Tristan said. "We shouldn't push anything too soon. She'll be safe here with Sophia and protectors keeping watch."
"Nonetheless…the sooner, the better," Solomon said pointedly.
"If we act too quickly, they'll only assume we're pushing forward with the plan and they'll feel threatened by that," Tristan said. "The more natural we are about it, the more time we take, the more time they think they have."
"You should proceed in secrecy," Solomon said. "The sooner there is a child…"
"Solomon, she's too young!" Mom interrupted. "At least allow her to finish college."
Solomon grunted.
"It is only a couple of years, darling," Rina soothed, reaching back to pat his hand. "That is nothing to us."
I squirmed in discomfort as they discussed plans for my future— my marriage, my child—as if I weren't there. Though nearly everything about the Amadis was still as murky as the Everglades swamps, I saw a few things with perfect clarity. A future I didn't like flashed before me, showing me as a puppet. I decided I better speak up now or I would be handing them the strings forever.
"Tristan and I will know when it's time to take each next step. We will determine that," I said clearly and firmly. "On our terms."
Everyone stared at me in mild shock. Except Tristan. He grinned widely. A smile eventually spread across Rina's face, too.
" Yes, you will be magnificent ," she said in my head.
And that was it. We said our good-byes, then Solomon hooked Rina's arm in his and they disappeared into the night—early morning, actually—returning to wherever they came from. I wondered where that was and I wondered if they were mates. Despite how much I'd learned tonight, I still knew so little.
"Stay together tonight?" Tristan asked me when we had a moment alone. I nodded. "Here or my place?"
I felt physically and emotionally exhausted and didn't want to go anywhere, but I remembered my broken bed and frowned. "Your place, definitely."
As we pulled out of the driveway, I watched Stefan and Mom on the front porch as they turned to go inside, still discussing plans for my protection, I assumed. Stefan stroked his square jaw and chin thoughtfully. In a strangely familiar way. In a matter of two seconds, it all came back to me.
Sheffie!
Sheffie who took me to the park, to the zoo and out for ice cream. Sheffie who drank my invisible tea, sang lullabies at bedtime and made the best French toast in the world. Sheffie who took me for a carousel ride when it was closed and somehow made it go, playing lively carnival music, my horse sliding up and down as I squealed with delight and he stood next to me, making sure I didn't fall off. Sheffie who loved me. Loved me like a dad. Or so I'd thought.
And then I remembered I had seen Mom cry before. Once.
"Stop! Tristan, stop!" I smacked his shoulder. He looked back at me. "Stop! Now!"
He stopped and cut the engine at the bottom of the driveway. Somehow I managed to scramble off the bike and nearly run up the front walk to the house. Mom and Stefan stopped just inside the door and turned toward me.
"You son of a bitch!" I screamed. And before I knew what I was doing, my hand slapped Stefan's face with a loud smack ! "That's for what you did to my mom. And this one's for me!"
I raised and swung my hand again, but it wa
s caught in mid-air.
"Alexis, what the hell?" Tristan asked with bewilderment.
I stared at Stefan as my chest rose and fell with anger.
"You want to know why I had such trust issues?" I fumed through burning tears. "You want to know what started it all? Ask him!"
"Stefan?" Tristan still sounded confused.
"Yes! But he was Sheffie to me. And he was the first one to leave and break my heart."
And I knew it was true when Stefan lowered his head and sighed sadly. That's why he couldn't look me in the eye all night. That's why I could feel his guilty conscience.
"You left us! You left me ! You were the closest thing I ever had to a dad and you left me!"
"Lexi, my love," Tristan pulled me into his arms and I cried against his chest. "I think you're confused…."
"No. No, she's not," Stefan said, his voice full of quiet grief. "She remembers right."
I looked at him through my tears and remembered him clearly now, although I had only been four or five years old the last time I saw him.
"You were the only boyfriend who cared about me. Who really cared . Not just because I was around and fun to play with. Not just to impress Mom. Or so I thought. I thought you really loved me."
"Alexis, I did love you," Stefan said quietly. "I still do."
"But you left ! And you never came back!"
"I am so sorry." And I could hear it in his voice. My anger broke and all I felt was the sadness renewed.
"Honey, Stefan was never really a boyfriend. He was our protector then," Mom said. "Eventually, he had to move on to a new assignment. He had to go."