by Cleo Jones
Nia met his gaze and sighed. “Blake, Come on,” she whispered. “This isn’t working anymore and you know it…”
“We can make it work.”
“Right.” Nia gave him an incredulous look. “Look…as much as it pains me to admit this, Karen isn’t in the wrong for having a problem with me. There isn’t a woman on the face of the earth that would be happy with her boyfriend living with his ex.”
“Karen’s gone,” Blake protested. “I ended things with her.
Nia fell silent then, taking a moment to inspect Blake’s face for any sign of how he was feeling. She couldn’t tell whether or not he was angry with her. “I’m sorry,” she said in a guarded voice. “I didn’t mean for that to happen…are you alright?”
Blake shrugged. “Yeah, I mean…it’s not like we were dating or anything. It wasn’t serious and I never intended for it to be. You and Noah…that’s what’s really important to me. That’s what truly matters.”
Nia’s heart skipped a beat. “Still,” she whispered, studying the ground. “What’s going to happen when you find someone you are serious about?”
“That won’t ever happen,” Blake said, failing to explain that it already had happened…with her.
“You can’t know that,” Nia said, shaking her head in frustration. “Sometimes feelings are really strong. They can be polarizing.”
“Are we even talking about me anymore?” Blake hedged. “Because it kinda sounds like we’re not…”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Oh come on, don’t play dumb,” Blake said, looking past her out the window. “I overheard you talking to Deidra about some guy…”
“A guy?” Nia frowned in reflection, obviously not following.
Blake sighed. “Look…I was open with you about Karen wasn’t I? Don’t I deserve the same courtesy?”
“Blake, I’m serious, I really don’t know what you’re talking about…”
Blake tore his gaze from the glass to look at her then, returning her frown with one of his own when he realized that she wasn’t lying. “You’re seeing someone,” he said again, this time with more uncertainty. “Right?”
Nia shook her head and failed to stifle a laugh. “Good Lord,” she said in between breaths. “Is that why you’ve been so mean lately? Because you thought I was seeing someone behind your back?”
Blake gave her a dumbfounded look. “So you’re not?”
“No,” Nia confirmed, reaching for his hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. “The only thing I was talking to Deidra about was how I’m going back to school to get my Masters.”
A wide smile broke across Blake’s face then. “Seriously?” he questioned. “Nia, that’s amazing!”
Nia returned his smile, allowing him to pull her into a hug. It had been quite some time since someone other than her sister seemed genuinely proud of her, and she couldn’t help but relish in it.
“So…we’re okay then?” Blake questioned, pulling back to look at her.
“Yes, but there is still one issue we need to discuss here…”
“I told you, Karen’s long gone...”
“I know, but trust me, there will be other Karen’s,” Nia said, speaking firmly. “You’re a great guy. It sort of comes with the territory. I just don’t want to be blindsided again when it happens.”
Blake hesitated. It took everything in him not to convey his true feelings to Nia, and he was sure that everything he was feeling was writing itself across his face. “That’s really not something you need to worry about,” he finally spoke up. “I promise.”
Nia inhaled a sharp breath when she noticed the way Blake was staring at her. It made her feel on guard, and she could tell that their conversation was about to take a turn in another direction. A direction she wasn’t so sure she was ready to deal with. No matter how many days passed, she couldn’t pretend not to remember the night she and Blake had spent together at her old place. Even if she could, the absence of her period wouldn’t allow it. “Things happen,” she whispered, looking down at her hands. “Women like Karen happen...”
“I told you,” Blake whispered, brushing a stray curl behind her ear and forcing her to meet his gaze. “She meant nothing...”
“Then why were you with her?”
Blake recoiled a bit then, hesitating for a moment before responding. “Do you really want to know?”
Nia nodded.
“I wanted to distract myself,” Blake said, speaking honestly. “I thought you had fallen for someone else…and it…it killed me. I thought spending time with Karen would help me get over you, but all it did was force me to come to terms with something I’ve been avoiding…”
“And what’s that?”
Blake licked his lips, and swallowed hard. “That I’m not over you,” he admitted. “Not even close.”
Chapter twenty-nine
Blake awoke the following morning to the sound of Noah screaming, and he found him sitting on the lid of the toilet in the bathroom with Nia posted above him combing through his curls. “Maybe it’s time for a haircut,” he suggested, making his presence in the doorway known.
Nia looked up at him like he was insane and shook her head. Her son’s hair was one of his best features, not to mention one of the only things he’d inherited from her instead of his father. She wasn’t quite ready to bid it adieu just yet. He could hop on the fade express in his teen years if that was what he wanted, but right now, she called the shots.
“What time are you leaving?” Blake questioned, changing the subject. He was referring to the carnival Noah wouldn’t stop talking about, and it was obvious by the look on his face that he was fishing for an invite.
“About a half-hour,” Nia answered, focusing her attention on the curl custard she was sifting through Noah’s hair. “You can come, but hurry up and get ready. We want to be on the road before traffic gets bad.”
Blake smiled at her and hurried to get dressed. The trio left the house shortly after, making the drive across town to the mall parking lot where the carnival was being held.
“Are you alright?” Blake questioned when they were about halfway there, briefly glancing away from the road to eye Nia for a response. Something wasn’t right. She was being far too quiet for comfort, and he couldn’t help but think it had something to do with their conversation the previous night.
Nia nodded. “I guess I just have a case of the blues about Noah going back to school next week,” she explained, keeping her voice low so as not to pull their son’s attention from his Game Boy. “I can’t believe he’s nearing in on the end of elementary school. Makes me feel old.”
Blake offered her an understanding smile. “I’m sure you’re not the only mother who feels that way,” he said, reaching across the middle console for her hand and giving it a light squeeze.
Nia’s demeanor softened then, and she was talkative and relaxed throughout the rest of the trip. Today was Noah’s day, and as melancholy as she felt, she was determined to make it count.
“Can I play?” Noah questioned once they’d entered the carnival ground and had stopped in front of a ring tossing game to consider their next move. It wasn’t the game that had caught his eye, however. It was the wall of prizes behind it that really had him interested.
“Ten for three tries at a prize,” the teenage carnival worker announced, speaking in a voice that was anything but enthusiastic.
Nia exchanged a look with Blake. “What a rip off…”
Blake shrugged and pulled out his wallet. “These things usually are, but if it’ll make Noah happy, it’s a pretty good investment don’t you think?”
Nia smiled to herself as she watched Blake hand the money over to the carnival worker. If she let him have his way, their son was going to be a full-fledged spoiled brat by the time he reached his 13th birthday. She wasn’t about to sit back and let that happen, but easing up a little bit for the sake of letting them have some fun today didn’t seem completely outside the realm
of question.
Nia was so caught up in watching Noah play the game that she didn’t notice Blake staring at her. She looked beyond beautiful beneath the soft neon lights bouncing off each ride, but it was the look of pride on her face that really tugged at his heartstrings. Noah had squandered his first attempt at tossing the ring, followed by his second, but it was his determination that left her feeling proud of him nonetheless.
Nia finally looked over at Blake when she felt her fingers brush up against his, and her breath caught in her throat when she realized just how close they were standing. She quickly looked away when she saw that he’d noticed too, but he took the leap anyway, proceeding to casually stroke the small of her back with his index finger. Without a word, she latched hold of his freehand, and there they stood until their son broke through them letting out a high-pitched squeal of joy.
“I won! I won!”
Blake and Nia shifted away from each other at the same time, complimenting Noah on his good work and regaining their composure long enough to watch him accept his prize. He chose the biggest one there was, an overstuffed elephant, and it proved exhausting to have to drag around the carnival throughout the rest of the day.
Nia was just about ready to call it quits when she looked down at Noah and noticed that his eyes had become heavy lidded. The trio decided to call it a day after riding one more ride, and they made it home about an hour later.
“I’ll carry him,” Blake offered when he looked in his rearview mirror to find Noah sound asleep, interrupting Nia’s silent deliberation as to whether or not she should wake him.
Nia thanked him, and Blake found her in the living room flipping through a magazine when he finally emerged from his son’s bedroom. He wanted so badly to remind her that they’d yet to finish their conversation from the previous night, but he didn’t want to risk saying something that would mess up the afternoon they’d just spent together.
Blake cleared his throat in an attempt at making his presence know. “They really don’t make those with men in mind, do they?” he spoke up, nodding at the front of the magazine.
Nia frowned and flipped back to the cover to see what he was talking about, feeling mildly embarrassed once she noticed the overtly sexual headline. “Noah had a blast today,” she said, changing the subject and tossing the magazine back on the coffee table. “It was nice…”
Blake nodded, stepping forward to take a seat beside her on the couch. Nia was well aware of his body in relation to her own, and she wasn’t surprised when she looked up to find his face just a few inches from hers. Before she could process what was happening, he was kissing her, and a months worth of buried emotions burst fourth from inside of her.
“What’s the matter?” Blake questioned when Nia shifted away from him, pulling his hands from her curvaceous form to look her in the eye. His breath was ragged and uneven, and it was obvious that he wasn’t ready for the moment to come to an end just yet.
“We can’t do this,” Nia whispered. “What if Noah were to—”
“Noah’s asleep,” Blake interrupted, continuing to kiss her neck.
Nia let out a soft moan, but she pressed a hand against his chest to hold him back. “Yeah, but he could wake up at any moment,” she rationalized, feeling her mind work itself into overdrive. “What if he came down and found us like this?”
“So we’ll go into the bedroom then.”
Nia let out a frustrated sigh. “No, I mean…we literally can’t do this,” she said, waving a hand between them. “I…I’ve been thinking about it…and I think it would be best if we continued just being friends.”
Blake sat up then, shaking his head in disbelief. “What, you mean like how we were ‘just friends’ when you started working for my father?” He let out a humorless laugh and rubbed his face. “Get real. You know as well as I do that there’s no just being friends with us.”
“We don’t have a choice,” Nia whispered, forcing the words out. “When you’re a parent, you have to think about your child’s needs before your own. We have to think about Noah here. Do you have any idea of the toll it would take on him if he were to lose you a second time?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Blake insisted, trying his best to keep his temper at bay. “How many times do I have to tell you that before you believe me?”
“It’s not about words, Blake…”
“You’re right, it’s not,” Blake damn near shouted. “This is about you punishing me for leaving, and you’re never going to stop, are you?”
Nia failed to stifle a laugh. “So me not fucking you is punishment in your eyes?”
“Don’t do that,” Blake spat, pointing a finger at her. “Don’t go putting words in my mouth. You know exactly what I’m talking about here. You’re toying with me and you know it. “
Nia was just about to respond when Blake paced out of the room and grabbed up his car keys along the way. “That’s right!” she called after him. “Do what you do best! Run!”
Blake didn’t grace Nia with a response though. Instead he squared his shoulders and made his way outside, making a point of slamming the door shut behind him.
Chapter thirty
Nia could count the number of times Blake had spoken to her in the past week on one hand. Whenever she tried to engage him in conversation, he’d clam up and promptly make some excuse to leave the room. Wanting a distraction from the newfound tension between them, she threw herself into her coursework, but she was surprised to find him waiting for her in the kitchen when she returned home from class one morning shortly into the semester.
“I have an old friend dropping by this weekend,” Blake informed her, keeping his gaze focused on his phone. “It’ll be an overnighter. I just wanted to give you a heads up.”
Nia’s blood pressure spiked a few notches, but she tried her best not to seem fazed. “Where are they going to sleep?”
“The guest room,” Blake said, conveniently glossing over the fact that it also happened to be Nia’s current bedroom. “I’ll take the couch, and you’ll take my room.”
Nia scoffed at that. “Seriously? You’re just going to offer up my room to someone?”
“Oh don’t get all riled up,” Blake said, sliding his phone shut and offering her a condescending smile on his way out the door. “You have an entire day to hide your valuables.”
Nia watched him make his way upstairs and sighed. She spent the rest of the afternoon transferring her belongings over to Noah’s closet for safe keeping, and she was in the process of doing laundry when Blake stuck his head in the room to let her know that he was going to pick Noah up from school.
“No need,” Nia told him, stuffing the last of the pile of linens beside her in the wash. “I’ll get him. I have some errands to run anyway.”
“Well how long are you going to be?”
Nia gave him an annoyed look. “However long it takes...”
“Nia, come on,” Blake sighed and leaned against the doorframe to get a better look at her. “You know I told Noah I’d take him to see that movie after his first full week of school.”
“And you still can,” Nia told him. “It’s not like we’re going to be gone all night.”
Blake sighed in acquiesce, taking one last look at Nia before making his way back down the hall. She let out a breath of relief as soon as he was gone, and she left the house to go pick up Noah after turning on the washer. They returned home from running errands shortly after the streetlights came on, but Blake’s car was no longer in the driveway, and he still wasn’t home when Noah went down for bed.