by Vanessa Vale
These were the questions Nix and I asked ourselves every day because there were no answers.
A waiter came by with a tray loaded with hot drinks. Nix stopped him, handed one to me, kept one for himself. “Tonight we have fun. Tomorrow we deal with the mayor.”
He clinked his glass with mine.
“The party’s a hit. Your work is done. What should we do?” he asked Kit.
“Ice skate,” she replied almost gleefully.
“Come on, Kitty Kat. Show me what you’ve got.” Donovan wrapped an arm around Kit and led her toward the frozen pond, offering us a little wave as goodbye.
“You okay?” Nix asked me, studying my face.
I was tall, five-nine, but I still had to tip my head back to look at him. I nodded.
He angled his head toward the benches where Donovan and Kit sat to put on skates. “You good on your own if I catch up with them?”
I loved that he and Donovan were dating Kit together. They knew their minds, didn’t give a shit about what anyone thought and went for it. Kit looked like a very happy woman, and I envied her.
That made me think of Shane and Finch. I didn’t want a relationship, not anything like the solid one Nix was building with Donovan and Kit. It didn’t mean I couldn’t have that smile on my face like Kit’s, which looked like she had been well fucked, and recently. And often.
I didn’t need a relationship. I looked out toward the pond, saw Shane and Finch talking with Poppy. They’d offered.
All I had to do was accept.
I looked to Nix. “I’m fine. Go. Have fun.”
“You, too.”
“I plan to,” I murmured after he walked off. I’d been hot for two cowboys for hours, ever since I pointed my gun at them in Poppy’s living room. Shane’s dirty talk… God, that had been hot. It had made my nipples hard, my panties wet. I wanted what they offered. Why shouldn’t I take it? No strings. Only orgasms. It was insane, but… yes, please.
I walked over to join Shane, Finch and Poppy. “Hey! Having fun?” she asked.
“Great party,” I said, glancing around. The band was playing. People were dancing. Skating. Drinking.
“Thanks.” Someone shouted Poppy’s name, and we looked toward the dance floor. A small group waved her over.
“Gotta run!”
She dashed off, leaving me with Shane and Finch.
“I accept your offer,” I blurted out before I could change my mind.
Finch’s hand froze, the beer he was drinking halfway to his mouth. “Sugar,” he murmured, and I watched as his gaze heated. He handed the beer to a passing waiter without looking away from me.
Shane took a step closer, tucked my hair back over my shoulder. I shivered even though I wasn’t cold at all.
“I want to sample the goods first,” I said.
“What?” Shane asked, a crease forming in his brow.
I shrugged. “You said no relationship, so you’re offering a service of sorts. I want to know I’ll be satisfied.”
“That’s right. You don’t have to buy the whole cow. You’ll get the milk for free.”
My mouth fell open at Shane’s words. Processed, then rolled my eyes. “Wrong analogy. A woman has no interest in buying the whole pig when all she wants is a little sausage.”
Shane’s deep laugh had people turning to look our way. “Fine,” he replied. “Only the sausage.”
“And they’re not little,” Finch added with a wink.
“I still want a sample first.” I shrugged, tried to sound casual. “I mean, a woman’s got to know if a man’s worth taking to bed.”
Finch grinned. “Challenge accepted.”
Shane took my hand, led me around the side of the barn. “You don’t have to worry your pretty little head about that.”
“Wait, where are we going?” I asked as the glow from the fairy lights disappeared, the sounds from the party faded. We were alone.
Finch was right behind us.
“You want a sample, we’ll give you a sample.” Shane moved in, pressed me against the wall. Kissed me.
Holy shit, could he kiss. A big hand cupped my cheek and held my head right where he wanted me. I moaned when he nipped my lower lip, then angled us so he could go deep, his tongue tangling with mine. My nipples hardened. My core ached to be filled. My body went soft, pliant, and between the barn at my back and the hard press of his body against my front, I remained upright.
The temperature hovered well below freezing and I should have been a block of ice standing outside away from the heat lamps, but I was burning up. I was surprised the snow at our feet didn’t melt. The zipper on my thick down jacket slid all the way down. His lips brushed along my jaw to my ear.
“Fuck, you taste so good. Are you this sweet everywhere?” Shane asked.
I whimpered at his question. His tongue flicked the very sensitive spot behind my ear, then moved down the side of my neck.
I gripped his coat, held on for dear life.
“This is crazy,” I said, my eyes opening to look up at the sea of stars across the inky-black sky. My breath came out in little clouds of steam.
“Not crazy. Perfect. You wanted a sample, sugar.” Finch stood directly beside me. His warm hand slid under my sweater, over the bare skin of my belly to cup my small breast. “Fuck, you’re so soft.”
I could barely see his face—the bright moonlight was shielded by the wide brim of his cowboy hat—as his other hand joined the first beneath my clothes and played with my nipples through my bra. My back arched instinctively into his calloused palms.
“I… wow, this is intense. Maybe we should talk some more?” I asked. I’d never felt like this. So hot, so needy. So quickly. I was out of control. Hell, I had no control over my body, how they were making me feel. Both of them.
I was making out with two guys, and that was why this was insane.
I was crazy. I didn’t go to parties, drink, make out with strangers. Hot strangers. This was so unlike me, telling two guys I wanted no-strings sex. Wanted a sample.
Okay, I’d kissed guys before, but one guy at a time. And it had been a long time. Loooonnnnnggg. My self-imposed ban on men had held for years. Until now, until Poppy’s party. Until them.
The asshole I’d been with in the past hadn’t gotten me this hot in all the time we’d been together. Looking back—because I hadn’t recognized it at the time—it was the demeaning and cruel words that had never gotten me wet, and no wonder. I hadn’t been loved. I hadn’t even been lusted after. I’d been a “thing,” and I’d been made to feel worthless.
These two? I felt desired. Wanted. Safe. Finch and Shane were already to second base, and I could probably come if they kept it up.
I blamed this insanity on the hot rum flowing through my veins. On Poppy. On my desperate need for a break from the Mills murder case that had taken up all my time and brain power. Poppy had wanted me to have a night off, to forget about everything, even for a little while.
I was definitely doing that with two handsome cowboys. One dark, the other darker. One tall, the other broader. Both gorgeous. Virile. Manly. I was here willingly with them in this secluded spot. I’d asked for it. I’d wanted this, but God, it was hard to give in, to let go. My brain and my libido were at odds.
“You want to talk?” Finch murmured. “Sugar, we can talk all you want. Should we chat about politics?”
Shane huffed out a laugh but didn’t stop licking and nibbling at my neck.
“God, no,” I practically moaned, then angled my head to give Shane better access.
“You want to talk about how responsive you are?” Finch gave my breasts a gentle squeeze. “I want a turn with her mouth.”
I laughed at that. Finch, who was the size of a Viking, sounded like a toddler not getting his fair share with a toy.
Shane growled against my collarbone. “You’re feeling her up and you want her mouth, too?” That was a sound of possession, and it sent a thrill through me. He didn’t want to give me up
.
“Fine. She’s got other places to kiss.” The cowboy dropped to his knees in the snow. His big body pushed the other guy to the side, but Shane didn’t stop kissing me. “Don’t you, sugar?”
Finch’s hands went to my jeans, opening them and pushing them over my hips, taking my panties with them. My breasts tingled and I wanted my nipples tugged some more, suddenly lonely without his hands on me. The freezing air rushed over the bared skin of my hips, butt and wet center.
“Oh my God,” I breathed, glancing down. Finch took off his hat, set it beside him as he looked up at me. His eyes were dark, and I couldn’t miss the desire I saw there. He wanted me.
Shane lifted his head from my neck, his breath fanning against my damp skin. “You wanted a sample of what it would be like. Want him to eat your pussy?” he murmured. “Or did you get enough? We can go back to the party and talk, leaving you all wet and needy.”
I nodded, then shook my head, confused as to how to answer. Did I want a big, brawny cowboy to put his mouth on me and make me come?
Yes. Yes, I did.
Did I care that he was practically a stranger? Did I care I’d only talked and flirted with them for the past thirty minutes? That I’d forced him to Poppy’s floor and handcuffed him?
No, I didn’t care. My pussy didn’t care. I had no doubt he knew what he was doing, that I was going to get the most epic sample of his prowess. That he could give me the first man-induced orgasm I’d had in years.
Standing behind a barn.
I looked around but saw only darkness. I heard the soft sound of music coming from the party, the murmur of voices. A glow came around the corner from the strings of fairy lights. Anyone could find us. “Please don’t stop,” I told him.
Finch grinned. “Step nice and wide so I can get in there.”
I did as he said, although with my jeans around my thighs, I couldn’t move too far.
He took a deep breath. “Fuck, you even smell sweet. If you still feel like talking, you can tell me how you like it.”
I should have been embarrassed by their dirty talk, but I wasn’t. I was turned on. Wildly.
“I… it’s been a long time. I don’t know.” My breath escaped in hot little pants.
I could see his wicked grin. “Just grab hold of my hair, sugar, and I’ll figure out what you like when you start tugging.” He didn’t wait a second longer. Leaning forward, he licked up my seam. I gasped and did as he said, tangling my fingers in the soft strands. “You’re dripping wet. You love this, don’t you?”
I could deny it, but he knew the truth. They both did. I could barely focus as the cowboy ate me out with a diligence that was impressive. Tongue, lips, the graze of teeth, even fingers got into the action.
Shane tipped my chin to look at him, and I got lost in his black gaze. “I love your little sounds of pleasure, but I’m not sharing you with anyone but Finch.” He covered my mouth with his, swallowing all the gasps and moans.
Finch. The guy whose tongue was flicking across my clit. Whose finger was curling over my G-spot, which I hadn’t even known I had. It was like he’d hit a button that had me close to coming.
Two men. I’d never had such an assault on my senses. Four hands. Two mouths. And they still had their clothes on.
I had no idea I was so easy to arouse, but I came ridiculously quickly, ridiculously hard, my hands in Finch’s hair, holding him in place, my hips rocking into him as I reveled in the most incredible pleasure. Ever.
Shane kissed me, swallowing my cries.
“Fuck, that was hot,” Finch said as he kissed my thigh. “Sugar, you can let go of my hair now.”
My fingers unclenched, and I laughed as Finch stood. “Sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry about.” He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, and I could see my arousal glisten on his lips and beard. The two of them worked my panties and jeans back into place.
Someone came around the barn, breaking the spell between us. All we could make out was the guy’s silhouette against the party lights, but he paused when he saw us, mumbled an apology and turned around.
It was enough to make me realize I was getting chilled, that the rum had worn off some. Holy shit, that had been some sample.
What would it be like if we were actually indoors, in a bed? Naked? That while I’d had the best orgasm of my life, I realized how insane it was. Crazy.
There was that word again.
“We should get back to the party. It’s too cold to take things further,” Shane said, tucking my hair back over my shoulder. I wore a knit hat, but I had left my hair long.
“I want a bed for what I want to do to you,” Finch added, taking hold of my hand and kissing the knuckles. “If you liked the sample, that is.” His grin was of self-satisfaction, knowing his oral skills were incredible.
As we came around the old barn and rejoined the party, I worried everyone was staring at me, that they could tell what we’d done. Ridiculous, unless they’d heard me come. No, impossible, or at least I hoped.
I did a quick scan. Poppy was dancing. Nix and Kit were with Donovan skating.
It was obvious how tight they were, how in love. I’d never said a word about any relationships with him. Being cops and partners, we were close, but not that close. Besides, I didn’t have any kind of love life to share. I still didn’t because what Shane and Finch had done to me wasn’t love. It was sex. Almost sex. A sample. I’d made it clear I wasn’t looking for a relationship, and they were fine with that. Hell, they’d offered themselves to me.
And had certainly done so. I’d gotten off. They hadn’t.
I wasn’t a prude. Obviously I was fine with my sexuality if I let two guys have their way with me, but it wasn’t me. I hadn’t slept with a man in years. Four, to be exact. And not just sex. Kissing. Making out. Whatever we’d done behind the barn. I’d been man-free all this time. One party and a little liquor and I was close to changing that.
From what I could tell, Shane and Finch were nice guys. While Shane was Poppy’s brother, they seemed to really get along, to have a close relationship. She seemed to like Finch, too. I had no doubt she’d give us getting together two thumbs-up. Still, nice or not, I didn’t want a relationship—not that I thought an orgasm constituted one—on top of everything else right now. Murder and multiple men in my life didn’t mix.
“I… I should go.” I’d gone a little wild. Forgotten about work. About the case. About steering clear of men. Even though my body hummed and my muscles felt like pulled taffy, I had to keep my head on straight. One incredible orgasm and I was considering more.
Shane and Finch turned to face me, to block out the party with their big bodies. “What? Now?” Finch asked.
I could see him clearly. The light brown hair that peeked out beneath his cowboy hat. The tanned skin, the strong jaw that was covered in a closely shaved beard. The concern and lingering heat in his eyes. I tilted my head back to meet his eyes.
“This isn’t me,” I practically pleaded. “I don’t tell guys I’ll go for a no-strings fling.”
Shane and Finch glanced at each other, then back at me. “This is you,” Finch said.
I pushed at him because I wasn’t going to be patronized, but they wouldn’t let me by. They didn’t know me, know what was in my head.
“With us, you’re like this. Hot, responsive,” he added.
“It’s fucking incredible that we could see you like that, that you trusted us enough to give in to what’s between us,” Shane said.
Had I? Had I given in, submitted? Handed over every thought and worry to them?
I had. Shit.
“There’s nothing between us,” I countered. “I told you, there can’t be.”
“There can, if you let it,” Shane added.
I studied them. They were so handsome. So… nice. And sexually skilled beyond anything I’d ever experienced, and they hadn’t even gotten naked.
“Why?” I asked. All of a sudden I remembered how it had f
elt with Chad, my asshole ex. The feelings of inadequacy. Of shame. Of feeling less.
“Why what?” Finch asked, running a hand over his beard.
“Why do you want me so much? Is it because you didn’t get off?” I asked, glancing down at the fronts of their jeans. We were back under the strings of fairy lights, and I couldn’t miss the thick outlines of their dicks straining against the material.
A couple walked past, and Shane waited to respond until they were out of earshot. He took a half step closer. “Don’t insult us or yourself. We want you because you’re smart. Funny. Hot as hell. Sexy.”
“You got all that from the, what, the half hour we talked?” I was lying to myself. I’d learned a lot about them in that amount of time. I wouldn’t have gone off with them otherwise.
Both shrugged.
“You come like a dream,” Shane said.
“When you know, you know,” Finch added.
When you know, you know.
My heart thudded at those words because they were dead-on. Shit. I felt different with them, like I was everything they said. That I was more than my badge, that I wasn’t just a woman to fuck. They intrigued me. They made me hot. Hell, they’d made me come, and that scared me. They scared me.
Yeah, I was afraid of how they made me feel, but I’d learned it was safer for my heart to keep men at a distance, not on their knees with their faces between my thighs.
I’d been stupid thinking I could do simple. It was what I wanted, but I couldn’t pull it off. One orgasm didn’t mean forever. It couldn’t.
“I told you no strings. I can’t have more. All I know is… is, I have to go.”
This time, when I tried to get past, they let me. I tracked down Poppy and said goodbye, then fled. From feeling, because it hurt too much. Alone was better than broken.
4
FINCH
“We shouldn’t have let her go like that,” I said, keeping my eyes on the road.